You can't blame him. He doesn't have the means right now doesn't mean he won't tomorrow. My brother GOD would siprisr you befor the 1st half of the year.

Cutehector:
At 30 u are stayin with ur sister and her family..



Pray for urself bro.

Hmmmmm first and foremost I see an element of pride here. You trying to make us understand you re a graduate.
2; you are angry that your inlaw is not doing anything now only depend on your sister.

You have also made us to understand they don't have children.
Which also means you only have few plate to wash.
By the way if you are not rude and arrogant, do you expect your sister and her husband to be washing your plate And apart from that he is older than you. You are in ur thirties why he is in his forties. Which means he gave you a solid 10 years.

Now hear this, this man decided to make that request intentionally when he discovered you don't have a single respect for them, and therefore two captain can not live under the same roof.

My brother if there is anybody that need Jesus here, you should be the one.

Thank you.

Cutehector:
At 30 u are stayin with ur sister and her family..



Pray for urself bro.

lol,choi nairaland.this ur comment errh.lwkmd

Op,is either u keep washing dirty dishes n keep recievn d 'insults' or u leave the house for dem.afterall uar more lyk a squatter.u eat der food n sleep in d@ same ause. lol.uar even complaining when dev nt included Washing of clothes n general cleaning of d ause.Op,dey need der privacy most especially nw d@ dey ar lookin up to God for the fruit of d womb.Is bera u xcuse dem.

the OP has even abandoned his thread. nairalanders are mean o. all he wanted was an advice o!

@ 30 wen u are suppose to marry,u are there arguing in anoda man's huz who shld wash the dishes.oga go and hustle and let that family be @ peace.

Walahi!!! U no get shame at all, wetin make u bring this kind story to NL? By now, I know u wud be ashamed with all the responses and suggestions u have received. Because u are 30 now, we no go hear word again, if u still need to be reminded to wash the dishes, only God knows how your own house go dey if u eventually rent one.
Na ur type go dey tell ur wife to come bak home to wash the dishes after going to work. From 7-10 and u have been home since 6pm, ur type no go fit help do anything at home, only to come back from work, watch TV, eat food,press phone and Bleep. SHAME ON YOU
U are the only useless person in that house,at least ur BIL. Still dey enter kitchen dey cook for d family even if no be in money, what do u do to help at home? Eat food?
Ur brother inlaw dey nice sef, if not, na one day wen us sister has gone to work he for treat ur Bleep up.
All these dey happen cos ur BIL never get job, wait till he gets a job den u go know who be the head of d family and who decides on who stays and who leaves. M*M*

The op neva said anytin to me dat depicts pride, he was only tryin to explain in detail, the nature of tins. Personally I think askin a fellow man like me to wash plate is a big insult and I stand to be corrected. People talk as if renting a house is easy when the know fully well wht is involved. I will advise the op to endure or better still move out of the house, as it is obvious his inlaw is having some issues

This OP no know anything. I'm sorry for you. You're terribly close-minded. Better go and find the woman who will go and work for you while you also stay home as a king, commanding everybody. When you try, you'll quickly learn to respect your in-law for the feat he's pulled off. You neva know anything. Better go back to your mother's house and there you can prove right and wrong

As a man u r expected 2 undergoes some stages after which u can be able 2 answer a complete man...I personally have nothing against ur inlaw...he own d house and have right 2 act in his house as he wish...focus on ur job hurt and never disregard ur inlaw....all d best

Don't wash any plate jare. Plenty accommodation dry Oshodi under bridge

Addicted2Women:
Why are you so concerned about him being an unbeliever ??
You are a believer and you ain't a virgin, you have been having sex.
He is way better than you.

Secondly, you have to show him the appreciation for allowing you stay in his house by washing the dishes and toilet.
Do you wanna wake up every morning, eat,bath and sleep all day ??

Thirdly, you said he doesn't work ??
Why ain't you working and have your own apartment ??
When i was 25, i was a millionaire.
Now, tell me how useless and lazy you are.

U were a millionaire @25? Seriously? Do u need 2 announce 2 d world dat u where once a millionaire? So what happened? U went bankrupt I guess dats probably because of ur showoff. Bros dats really staled look 4 something else 2 brag about Jare. Mtcheeeew

Naomite:


U were a millionaire @25? Seriously? Do u need 2 announce 2 d world dat u where once a millionaire? So what happened? U went bankrupt I guess dats probably because of ur showoff. Bros dats really staled look 4 something else 2 brag about Jare. Mtcheeeew

I just checked your profile.
You look like my maid.
Go find your mates.

Goodbye, sweet heart

Tell them brother...... All of them are just commenting shit as if life is easy...

Not supporting wat he did tho. He's meant to do almost all d wrk in d house cos he's d youngest. But telling him to get a job as if its easy or asking him to move out or even insulting him because he's 30 shows dat all of u are wicked.....

Wickedness dey una blood aswear... I hva many frnds dat are above 30, struggling to get a job or a place to live in lagoshey could not. Does it make them lazy?

D fact dat u are lucky to graduate and get ur dream job at a younger age doesn't mean dat u would insult men dat are struggling to survive....

Even ladies follow d bash d guy. I guess if he has pusy like u, he wud hav gotten a job and a place at his age by now....cos he would hav used d p***sy 2get himself an apartment and a job d way sum of u did....

I'm above 30 and m still xpectin a gud job. M an engr with a gud result, bt I'm hopeful cos job wud com soon.. Just moved out and got into my lil apartment dis jan. So I knw exactly wat he's passing tru now. All we need to do is to advice and encourage him and not insult him...


Op, my frnd, b prayerful and also hopeful, a job would com. Start any lil tin u see so dat u wud b d house every day. Maybe start a factory work just to keep urself busy. B humble and do anytin he ask u 2do. If u hav to wash his bom bom wen he poo, do it. Its for a short time. It will pass. Most of us hav experienced such ugly situation.

DonUjay:
.Do you need to tell Him to Pray for Himself? Because you had it easy in Life you think its like that for everyone. It's People Like you that succeed in Life and start Looking at other Poor People as Lazy

uyiekpenm:
Oga please try to get your own place. What do you expect. At your age you are living with your sister. Smh.
Pls respect yourself and leave that house.

Ah Han. That was mean. Someone's plight.....

Mekzmoney:
Tell them brother...... All of them are just commenting shit as if life is easy...

Not supporting wat he did tho. He's meant to do almost all d wrk in d house cos he's d youngest. But telling him to get a job as if its easy or asking him to move out or even insulting him because he's 30 shows dat all of u are wicked.....

Wickedness dey una blood aswear... I hva many frnds dat are above 30, struggling to get a job or a place to live in lagoshey could not. Does it make them lazy?

D fact dat u are lucky to graduate and get ur dream job at a younger age doesn't mean dat u would insult men dat are struggling to survive....

Even ladies follow d bash d guy. I guess if he has pusy like u, he wud hav gotten a job and a place at his age by now....cos he would hav used d p***sy 2get himself an apartment and a job d way sum of u did....

I'm above 30 and m still xpectin a gud job. M an engr with a gud result, bt I'm hopeful cos job wud com soon.. Just moved out and got into my lil apartment dis jan. So I knw exactly wat he's passing tru now. All we need to do is to advice and encourage him and not insult him...


Op, my frnd, b prayerful and also hopeful, a job would com. Start any lil tin u see so dat u wud b d house every day. Maybe start a factory work just to keep urself busy. B humble and do anytin he ask u 2do. If u hav to wash his bom bom wen he poo, do it. Its for a short time. It will pass. Most of us hav experienced such ugly situation.

Well written to point. *doffs hat*

Pls ur definition of corrupt songs den 2 yu can't be at home and ur broda in law wud be washing plate naw, weda ur sista works 7 to 7 and d hubby sits at home it's none of ur biz. If yu tired n can't wash plates pack ur bags n leave.

Addicted2Women:


I just checked your profile.
You look like my maid.
Go find your mates.

Goodbye, sweet heart

Seriously dude, I feel so sorry 4 commenting on ur post. I never knew u kinda have a serious mental challenge until I view ur profile, and what I saw is really sympathetic. Guess u just return from rehab. May God heal ur conditions "addicted2women"? Dats a serious problem that only divine intervention can cure. Sorry pal

byvan03:
Who are you expecting to do the dishes? You Are the youngest so you have to do it or move out.

Honestly, I do not get it

Must the OP be told to do chores before doing them? Even if he was contributing to the finances?

The sister better sends him away before he causes a friction between herself and hubby.

bukatyne:


Honestly, I do not get it

Must the OP be told to do chores before doing them? Even if he was contributing to the finances?

The sister better sends him away before he causes a friction between herself and hubby.

Even has the guts to complain that the man that has harboured him rent free is jobless. I can't believe he expects to eat free food and live in a free house but can't wash plates used by his older inlaw. Pride is his problem.

GMartyns:
Hello, I have to share this with you simply because I want to have you suggest and advice on what to do.

After my graduation, It's over a year now that I've been staying with my Elder Sister and her husband. No kids yet.  Believing God for a job. So I could be independent of anyone.

The issue is, I wonder how on earth my sister could marry him- an unbeliever. Him and my sister are just like two opposite poles. She's a believer, but the husband claims to be a christian but not ungodly so to speak. At a time, he stopped going to church for a period of 3 to 4 months.

He listens to corrupt songs, and at a time told my sister her parent would burry her soon. What transpired between them I could not tell.

He suddenly becomes rude, demanding that, I,  his brother in-law should wash every plate he uses to eat the food he cooks and dishes out by himself in the presence of my sister.

This is a man who stays at home all the day doing absolutely nothing. He is 40. I am 30.

Each time I return home, the kitchen is always messed up. And deliberately, leaves the kitchen in such a mess, so I could clean them up for him, since I'm staying with them. Yet, he could cook the food by himself, dished it by himself and sleep all all day or probably watch the TV .

My Sister works 7 to 7 daily, and most of the times, she would have been tired , returning from work.

We don't eat together. I wash every plate I personally use. Most times, I cook the food, and have him and my sister eat first. And then I dish mine later.

Lately, I have been observing some fastings, and I rarely go to the kitchen to cook nothing. Yet he demands that must wash every plate he uses to eat whether or not I eat on that day.

My question is, Is it right for my Sister's Husband to be demanding for such, asking me to wash his dirty plates? when he doesn't even care whether I have eaten or not.

He said and I quote " I can't be washing plates in this house, neither is my wife going to do same, you must wash every plate used in this house  henceforth"

To me, it is the hottest insult I have ever received. Not even my own mother would demand for such a dirty request...

Now, I resolved to not eating anymore in the house, probably that would put a stop to the ridicule.

U have no choice it is his house, at 30 u shld b living in ur own house. Go n hustle hard n pay for ur own apartment even if it is one room in a face me I face u apartment. U r a man for crying out loud. I give u six months to leave dt house n dts wat ur brother in-law is telling u but ur thick skull won't understand.

Leaving with ur sister at ur age n serving them is unacceptable, it make u look like a zombie let it push u harder into making it

Miami11:
As long as you leave under their house you have to follow their rules

Most brother in laws have problems taking care of another man in their house

You are absolutely right. Your Inlaw has even tried, probably because of the love he has for your sister. With your rude attitude, no man will want to have you in his house. At 30, you should be able to marry and maintain your own house

byvan03:



Even has the guts to complain that the man that has harboured him rent free is jobless. I can't believe he expects to eat free food and live in a free house but can't wash plates used by his older inlaw. Pride is his problem.

I guess different strokes for different folks...

Must he be told to do the dishes before doing them? Abi which mouth would he use to eat the food his BIL cooked and expect the BIL to wash the plates...

Elder BIL?

Na wa

I hope he doesn't ruin his sister's marriage.

Buhahahahahahahaa
Nice to see man vs man for a change.
If it was the wife now we for no hear word.

Op funny enough you are in the same boat as your inlaw(unemployed), you'd better reduce your scorn before you end up suffering the same fate.

The man is probably not happy to have a witness to his domestication..as per his cooking and cleaning of the home while your sister brings home.the bacon and ontop.of it they are TTC. He shouldn't be ashamed o jare,its called stay at home.husband and he's obviously keeping up his end of the bargain by tending to the home.

Don't go and destroy happy/semi happy home my friend.I see his unbelieving corrupt music listening personality is giving you sleepless nights..Pele o.
As long as you are there,you have to pitch in or get out.2 of you should ensure your sister comes back to a house that is clean and welcoming, all.this power tussle won't be helping her state of mind at all.

Please, respect yourself and wash the plates.

So i had to come back and set sumthings straight. To all dose that think we re attacking d OP wrongfully, let it be known that there are certain ways you portray ur problems to people nd they will want to encourage or help u with kind words, nd der re oda ways u portray ur problems nd people juat want to hit u on d head. The OP started very wrong, his entrance was dat of a very proud nd boastful young man. Topic- My BIL is becoming too rude for MY LIKING (seriously?? Sorry bt to me, dats pride) den he went ahead nd stated his BIL's joblessness, how his sister provides for d house nd blah blah (dats uncalled for cus dats between husband n wife). If he simply came on here to explain his personal hardship nd solicit for assistance (not monetary) i know a number of NLanders will gladly help him. His approach is wat got him d bashing.

And to the OP: may God help you secure a good job so u can leave ur sister's house bt till den, be humble nd work in d house. Wen ur BIL sees that, he might just be d one to help u put ur case b4 ur sister so she can help u secure a room of ur own. Goodluck

freshvine:
Bros even if you're working and contributing in his house, you must still do the dishes.

Don't scatter your sister marriage ooo.

Devil is just ministering to you and you're mistaking it for the voice of the Holy Spirit.

Lol. you are a clown. my ribs don scatter.chai!

I've been very submissive washing the dishes ever since, even those times I didn't eat, except for these few days I've been fasting...(cos i wasn't even going to the kitchen at all) . Not that I'm that comfortable staying with them, even if they ask me not to do a thing in that house.

At times, I had felt like living that house, but couldn't , so it won't look like I didn't want to give a helping hand.

I do a lot of chores in that house, and run a lot of errands too , including cutting of grass on empty stomach, which i decided not to share in the story.

The truth of the matter is, I hardly eat breakfast and lunch in that house, because most times I could be busy out there to make ends meet, in the name of my sister's enterprise that we manage together. Meanwhile, the attitude has always been like that before I moved in with them. My sister comes back from work to meet all the dirty dishes he alone used for the day after a tiring day.

Nonetheless, many people who have made those fantastic comments here, have done so simply because they are yet to get the clear picture of things here and i don't blame them.

They wouldn't have made those comments if I had not naked my mind here.

Thanks All The Same. It's Always Darkest Before Dawn!

God Is At Work , I strongly Believe...Surely I shall leave shortly, because I Cant stay with them forever...And I shall surely come back here very soon to share with you, My Success Story.

OP, i i won't condemn you because that's unfortunately how many Nigerians treat people that stay with them. Just do what they ask and let that anger in you ginger you to get your own place. Even if you have to get a room mate and share the place, even if its a BQ its better than that place. Better to be your own Master in a hut than a Slave in a mansion. Try and find a business or take up any job no matter how small and save money to get a place. Use his disrespect as inspiration, make up your mind that very soon that man will be the one asking you for favours. Sometimes we need such people to push us to our destinies. You know what;s called righteous anger abi? let him motivate you to your sucess, in the meantime just try and spend as much time out of the house as possible. Leave early in the morning and come back at night and when home stay in your room so at least the disrespect will reduce till you get your place.

GMartyns:
I've been very submissive washing the dishes ever since, even those times I didn't eat, except for these few days I've been fasting...(cos i wasn't even going to the kitchen at all) . Not that I'm that comfortable staying with them, even if they ask me not to do a thing in that house.

At times, I had felt like living that house, but couldn't , so it won't look like I didn't want to give a helping hand.

I do a lot of chores in that house, and run a lot of errands too , including cutting of grass on empty stomach, which i decided not to share in the story.

The truth of the matter is, I hardly eat breakfast and lunch in that house, and meanwhile, the attitude has always been like that before I moved in with them. My sister comes back from work to meet the dirty dishes he used for the day after a tiring day.

Nonetheless, many people who have made those fantastic comments here, have done so simply because they are yet to get the clear picture of things here and i don't blame them.

They wouldn't have made those comments if I had not naked my mind here.

Thanks All The Same. It's Always Darkest Before Dawn!

God Is At Work , I strongly Believe...Surely I shall leave shortly, because I Cant stay with them forever...And I shall surely come back here very soon to share with you, My Success Story.

Abeg ignore those insulting you, i know there's no way you are staying there by choice and of course its hard to see that guy lazying around and taking advantage of your sister. As i said earlier use all these for motivation, it's Nigerians all people respect is money. That same guy and many of them talking her will be kissing your feet once you make it.

I think its a way to tell you that you have overstayed your welcome in that house.