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How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by GodnGold: 12:34am On Feb 20, 2016
Marxxx,you want help but you already served yourself a bowl full of help by being too smart...

Pay attention brother,that's how to get help.

Now,you say you guys are good with the break up,right?

Give yourself time.

I say time cos each time I loose a loved one,I give it time.

Time heals physical wounds,it sure heals emotional wounds.
Time is what you need.

Work on your attitude too...
You sound egocentric...I could be wrong and please correct me if I am.
no offence.

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 1:40am On Feb 20, 2016
ahnie:
Sup cherrymum?how z my lil2 baby Lam dooyin?my dear,easy with the wordinz.

Mama Zino. we good. missed out on thursday. this is juat a tiny bit of how i feel. i wish there was a "life undo" button. I'll be fine someday....very soon I pray.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by poshestmina(f): 4:20am On Feb 20, 2016
You are intentionally hurting yourself and you know it
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by ahnie: 5:19am On Feb 20, 2016
I understand...pls take it easy okay?kisses tu my hello bae.
cherrymum:


Mama Zino. we good. missed out on thursday. this is juat a tiny bit of how i feel. i wish there was a "life undo" button. I'll be fine someday....very soon I pray.
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by RiloKiley: 7:39am On Feb 20, 2016
Marxxx:
Jeeeezzzz....dude seems like you know just what is in my head....i mean exactly how I feel...but you didn't put up any prescription....?hello
My prescription is in the last paragraph. Give it time before your next relationship. Be careful not to jump headlong into a new one. Wait for the emotional void you are experiencing to disappear (although it never fully does) before u start any "serious" relationship.

If u r waiting for a prescription to remove these emotions u r feeling right now, honestly I don't have an answer to that except for u to ride it out.
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by cococandy(f): 8:34am On Feb 20, 2016
Only time heals emotional pain.
If your psychologist hasn't been able to help you, I doubt there's much we unlicensed folks can do to help.

I was against your decision to leave her but hey it's your life and as it stands now you've to live with the consequences of your decision which includes feelings of emptiness for a while.
But it won't last forever. that I can promise you.

Almost Everyone has been there once.
You may yet find someone else who you'll fall deeply in love with and begin to wonder why you felt the world was coming to an end when you broke up with this one. The human heart is resilient. You can survive without anybody.

Just give it TIME.

P.S I hope you settled her sha. according to your initial plan. Na my own be that lipsrsealed

Best of luck.

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 8:42am On Feb 20, 2016
GodnGold:
Marxxx,you want help but you already served yourself a bowl full of help by being too smart...

Pay attention brother,that's how to get help.

Now,you say you guys are good with the break up,right?

Give yourself time.

I say time cos each time I loose a loved one,I give it time.

Time heals physical wounds,it sure heals emotional wounds.
Time is what you need.

Work on your attitude too...
You sound egocentric...I could be wrong and please correct me if I am.
no offence.

The guy would never take feedback. You can see ego written all over his posts. You point it to him and he goes all defensive. They only learn by burning their hands and experience. Wish him well.

2 Likes

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by SSpeter(m): 4:41pm On Feb 20, 2016
Mr marxxx, just go easy on yourself. You will do great....That is life for you bro. if relationships were taught in classroom or offices am pretty sure you won't be in this mess....we can't have it all...

1 Like

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by SSpeter(m): 4:42pm On Feb 20, 2016
x240:


The guy would never take feedback. You can see ego written all over his posts. You point it to him and he goes all defensive. They only learn by burning their hands and experience. Wish him well.
dude is a great guy just that he is wired a bit differently...
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 11:51am On Feb 21, 2016
I'm not aware of your previous thread but it really does sound like you're entering into a state of depression cause you miss her terribly. Perhaps, one more attempt can still salvage this beautiful relationship with prayers, providing it's the will of God for you guys to be together. However, if nothing changes, just know there's someone out there for you but take it slow and steady - don't rush!
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by tymsplash: 12:29pm On Feb 21, 2016
It gets better with time. Just keep your mind busy get occupied and if you don't have a hobby find one. Working out helped me alot too. Lastly, never underestimate the power of prayer, it makes the healing process faster. Goodluck!

1 Like

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Allwility: 4:05pm On Feb 21, 2016
Marxxx, don't lose your diamond because you've got your eyes set on a glittering stone. You wanted a posh lady now, I hope you know most of them can't even boil an egg properly. Humble yourself, and take that lady home to mama.
My last advice to you. Settle whatever difference you have with your family members too. Cos he that has family, has everything.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by DonTim1: 6:59pm On Feb 21, 2016
"The human heart is resilient. You can survive without anybody." Coco candy.


MARXXX, come what may, you will end up being fine in time, you may have a void or memories that refuse to go away though.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 7:25pm On Feb 21, 2016
Best way to get over someone is to replace them.

Go out there, meet new people, have sex. . . . Get a hobby, join a club.

Don't curl up and cry, go out there and live your life!

1 Like

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by taiwoti(m): 9:28pm On Feb 21, 2016
Marxxx:
I can't express how I feel right now. Early this month my friend and I ended our relationship that started aeons ago. Although I made efforts to salvage the relationship but it didn't work and we resolved to go our separate ways

For the past two weeks I have not been thinking straight. I do things and then I will ask myself did I just do/say this. Last week I made an error in one of my reporting and that would have landed me a grade 1 query. When by boss alerted me about the mistake, I tendered a resignation letter instead of getting a query but he refused to accept the letter and advised me to take a week leave. I guess it's obvious that I am out of shape.

My decisions are clouded I mean I can't think anything for sure. Even when am correct I doubt and my feeding habit is deteriorating.

I enjoy being alone but now I am beginning to feel lonely. I mean I use to stay for months without my ex and I don't feel it but now I don't know why.

And I discovered recently that I am acting weird like I am now "Vulnerable" I mean...ok let me explain....The lady prepares food for me is from an agency and last week she brought food and I was "staring" at her and she stared back at me too smiling. This is someone that I had not noticed for a year. I had to contact the agency that I will be travelling so they shouldn't expect my order till next month. And now I realise my account officer at the bank has dimples. I have been acting unlike me lately.

I have contacted a psychologist and he is saying these feelings are normal then I asked him if he had being in a long relationship that ended abruptly and he said No. Although we are still communicating but I want to hear from someone with experience.

Pls I need an advice from someone who have had similar experience. How did you cope? And I want to ask again are these feelings normal? What do I need to do to get back on my feet quickly because I don't want to resume work in this state?

I have visited new places like my psychologist advised although meeting people and initiating a conversation is hard but I am bending....is there anything else I can do?

I will appreciate ur advice





I have read all your post about the said lady, but I will say something to you Mr Marxxx, I know you are a smart dude, but from experience even a smart person can be totally foolish when it comes to emotional situations, you are too stiff and drawn back towards reality, maybe its because of your job or the people you hang out with. This young lady in question is a rare gem that can stay with you during your worst state, and let me remind you that a GOLD is always ugly at first, but it takes patience to hit, smash, and beaten into something precious.

That said, my advise for you is to be patient and not to run into any hasty relationship just to fill her void.

Cultivate the habit to hang around with friends, create time for comedy shows or watch enough comedy on Youtube.

And lastly pray and pray for God's guidance, it seems to me you are trying to work everything out with your strength and its obvious its weighing you down brother. Seek God.

1 Like

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by jashar(f): 9:32am On Feb 22, 2016
your ex really did a number on you huh!!!

Pele dear.
Take one moment at a time.... it gets easier with time. You need to focus on each task that's before you. Pour all your concentration and energy to get your work done. If you have good friends, hang out with them.

But it's also good for you to learn the art of being alone and happy truly with yourself and God.

This is not the time to have flings ooo, cuz you might end up making costly and life altering mistakes.

Oh... you're the guy with the girlfriend who no wan upgrade... ehyah... so you've called it off...
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Amhappy(f): 5:51pm On Feb 22, 2016
I don't think coping should be much of a heartache to you since you are not an emotional person. Even for the emotional sensitive ones Time is the greatest healer. Being more aware of the people around you is natural and will be on the increase. My only advice to you will be to mend fences with ur family (I read ur posts) and learn to make friends. No man is an island. Cutting yourself off from the world especially for a perfectionist like you has greater tendency for depression and sucide.
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 10:26pm On Feb 22, 2016
please can you pm me her contact. Email is bemmanuel834@gmail.com I will be very grateful. I remember advising you but if break up is the best please send her num. I dont need her polished. I like her already

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 2:13pm On Feb 23, 2016
I hav experienced something worse than urs... My relationship of three years was ended by her... I was so down dat I told a girl dat claimed to love me to give me love portion to eat so dat I will love her but she refused cos she wants d love to b normal... While I was in another relationship, I had to imagine making lobe to my ex just for me to ejaculate while making love to my girl then... Anyway at d end it was God dat helped me.... I started desirin God to be free...
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 2:52pm On Feb 23, 2016
Dyt:


cheesy cheesy cheesy

Marxxx I am a good dresser A good cook and sometimes a terrible cook I am lazy I can't clean I like to live all in luxury I am too serious a woman Extrovert too Loves to party
I guess I have all you want to make you complete Pls let's collabo
omo see marketing... we ladies dey try ooo..lol
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Dyt(f): 3:04pm On Feb 23, 2016
namedonfinish:


omo see marketing... we ladies dey try ooo..lol

Yes na
Make he come check me out
The guy don go sef
Shior
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 3:48pm On Feb 23, 2016
Dyt:


Yes na
Make he come check me out
The guy don go sef
Shior

grin grin grin
wait first make I call am.. Marxxx marxxx abeg show.. dis babe already submitted application ooo, pls consider her ooo.. grin

but wait oo, am I dt wicked .. someone is in pain n here I am pokin fun... hmmm, it is well o my broda..
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Dyt(f): 4:14pm On Feb 23, 2016
namedonfinish:


grin grin grin
wait first make I call am.. Marxxx marxxx abeg show.. dis babe already submitted application ooo, pls consider her ooo.. grin

but wait oo, am I dt wicked .. someone is in pain n here I am pokin fun... hmmm, it is well o my broda..


Are you interested?
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Nobody: 4:18pm On Feb 23, 2016
Dyt:

Are you interested?
intrested in wat pls?
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Dyt(f): 4:29pm On Feb 23, 2016
namedonfinish:


intrested in wat pls?

In me
kiss kiss
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Marxxx: 5:02pm On Feb 23, 2016
taiwoti:



I have read all your post about the said lady, but I will say something to you Mr Marxxx, I know you are a smart dude, but from experience even a smart person can be totally foolish when it comes to emotional situations, you are too stiff and drawn back towards reality, maybe its because of your job or the people you hang out with. This young lady in question is a rare gem that can stay with you during your worst state, and let me remind you that a GOLD is always ugly at first, but it takes patience to hit, smash, and beaten into something precious.

That said, my advise for you is to be patient and not to run into any hasty relationship just to fill her void.

Cultivate the habit to hang around with friends, create time for comedy shows or watch enough comedy on Youtube.

And lastly pray and pray for God's guidance, it seems to me you are trying to work everything out with your strength and its obvious its weighing you down brother. Seek God.
Thanks!!!
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Marxxx: 5:03pm On Feb 23, 2016
jashar:
your ex really did a number on you huh!!!

Pele dear.
Take one moment at a time.... it gets easier with time. You need to focus on each task that's before you. Pour all your concentration and energy to get your work done. If you have good friends, hang out with them.

But it's also good for you to learn the art of being alone and happy truly with yourself and God.

This is not the time to have flings ooo, cuz you might end up making costly and life altering mistakes.

Oh... you're the guy with the girlfriend who no wan upgrade... ehyah... so you've called it off...
Thanks......
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Marxxx: 5:06pm On Feb 23, 2016
Amhappy:
I don't think coping should be much of a heartache to you since you are not an emotional person. Even for the emotional sensitive ones Time is the greatest healer. Being more aware of the people around you is natural and will be on the increase. My only advice to you will be to mend fences with ur family (I read ur posts) and learn to make friends. No man is an island. Cutting yourself off from the world especially for a perfectionist like you has greater tendency for depression and sucide.
I thought so too....i am recuperating...thanks..."perfectionist"....
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Marxxx: 5:07pm On Feb 23, 2016
abi20:
please can you pm me her contact. Email is bemmanuel834@gmail.com I will be very grateful. I remember advising you but if break up is the best please send her num. I dont need her polished. I like her already
Funny you.
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Marxxx: 5:10pm On Feb 23, 2016
DonTim1:
"The human heart is resilient. You can survive without anybody." Coco candy.


MARXXX, come what may, you will end up being fine in time, you may have a void or memories that refuse to go away though.
yea...I think am feeling a bit better
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Marxxx: 5:14pm On Feb 23, 2016
namedonfinish:

grin grin grin
wait first make I call am.. Marxxx marxxx abeg show.. dis babe already submitted application ooo, pls consider her ooo.. grin
but wait oo, am I dt wicked .. someone is in pain n here I am pokin fun... hmmm, it is well o my broda..
Dyt:


Yes na
Make he come check me out
The guy don go sef
Shior
seems both of you are having fun at my expense.........ok....
Re: How Did You Cope When You Had A Failed Relationship? by Dyt(f): 5:52pm On Feb 23, 2016
Marxxx:
seems both of you are having fun at my expense.........ok....

I thought you are better
Are you still bitter?
undecided

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