How to Talk to a Girl You Like.

Talking to someone you're attracted to can be nerve-wracking, especially if you have no idea what you're doing. If you're having trouble communicating with your crush, read on and learn how to find your voice on Palmchat.

Develop your interests. You don't need to be a brain to find things to talk about, but you do need to have passions and interests. A person who can talk naturally about things he's interested in is always better conversation than someone armed with pre-written prompts and a vague hope of getting a date.
Make a short list. List everything you're interested in. Go for more detail rather than less. For example, instead of “music,” write “playing classical guitar, going to concerts, collecting old funk LPs.”
Expand the list into topics. Using the example above, you might think about what brand of guitar you own or rent versus the brand you wish you could have, what concerts you've been to, and what funk bands you enjoy.
Make a mental note of your opinion on each topic. This will help you to know yourself better. When you talk about any subject you have an interest in, you'll be able to speak confidently about it and explain why you're interested in it, which makes for good conversation.

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Talk to girls. Wherever you interact with women on a regular basis – work, school, clubs, or elsewhere – make an extra effort to engage in small talk with them. This will teach you that there is nothing to fear about talking to a girl, even if you have a crush on her.
Start with people you already interact with a little bit, like coworkers. Ask them how their week has been going, and use short questions to encourage them to talk more. Most girls will be glad to talk with you for a moment.
If a girl asks about your week after she's told you about hers, do the polite thing and tell her, in about the same level of detail she used when talking to you. (Leave out the fact that you're trying to get better at talking to girls.)
Be friendly with project partners. At school or during community service, you will often be paired with a partner. When your partner is a girl you don't know very well, a little geniality will go a long way towards making things comfortable for both of you.
Try talking about the project rather than asking about her. If she responds well, continue on, and mix in small talk and simple questions as you go along.
Don't ask her about herself or her life. Instead, ask her what she thinks of another person, such as the teacher, or an upcoming event you both know about.
Don't talk too often. Show that you're primarily interested in being helpful and completing your project together. Speak as thoughts come to you, rather than pushing the conversation along.


Make your approach. Whenever you see a good opportunity to speak to your crush alone for a moment, even if other people are around, step up and do it.
Get her attention. Call her name and wave at her while smiling. Look happy to see her.
Meet her. Start walking up as soon as she's acknowledged you. Don't wait for her to come over to where you are. Show you're proactive and confident by closing the distance yourself.
If she looks upset or bothered by your greeting, or tries to pretend she doesn't hear you, she won't ever be interested in you. Cut your losses and move on. You deserve someone who will be glad to see you.

How to Find the Best Topics to Talk About With a Girl

Step 1: Let Her Do the Talking

Even though a lot of guys try to impress the women they are dating with all kinds of things, that they don’t really want to hear, the truth is that women don’t want men who are constantly talking. On the one hand, it is far more attractive to be together with a guy who reveals a little bit about himself, while maintaining the image of a mysterious gentleman. The other reason why women don’t want you to talk all the time is because they absolutely love to talk about themselves.
When a woman sits next to a man who encourages her to tell him her whole life story she will do it.

The only problem is that a lot of women are afraid of scaring you away by talking too much. We all have seen the annoying chatterboxes in movies. She doesn’t want to appear like one of them. That’s why it is so important to tell her directly that you want to find out more about her and that you want her to talk.

The huge benefit of this approach is that you will have more potential conversation topics by listening to her for ten minutes than other guys by studying whole books.

“I really want to know what kind of person you are. Tell me a little bit about yourself.”

Even if you ask her to tell you a little bit about herself, she will probably tell you a lot. Some women use their monologues to tell you exactly what they like and dislike. Others need a helping hand to reveal those things.

Step 2: Find Out What She Likes
How do you find out what a girl likes?

Use the information she gives you and ask her deeper questions according to that topic.

Let’s say she tells you that she loves to have fun, but that she is also a very caring person. I think I don’t have to tell you that this information is extremely superficial. A girl who wants to have fun can have this feeling during a Group Intimacy party or while she is feeding her hamster Freddy.
You want more details and the best way to get those details is by asking the right questions:

“What are the things that you like to do for fun?”

“Is fun for you more about excitement or about contentment?”

“Is there someone in your life who you take care of right now?”

“What does it mean for you to be caring?”

The answers to those questions will reveal what she likes and why she likes it.

Congratulations, now you know how to find topics to talk about with girls. All you have to do now is to make sure that you won’t Bleep it up.

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Very educating and informative.

9 Secrets To Wooing A Girl The Right Way

1. Hold the door for her.

Whether it’s the building door, elevator door, car door (big one), or even the revolving door; YOU HOLD IT. You put your strong, firm man hands on that door, back up your cute, toned butt and instruct her to enter. Say, “After you,” or “Come on in,” or “You may enter, sexy sugar mama,” or don’t even say anything at all. Stand there, look at her, and smile like you wouldn’t rather be doing anything else but standing there, looking at her, and smiling while holding that door open for her. This moment right here is often one of the first opportunities you have to show a girl what a gentleman you are. It seems so obvious, yet many men either forget that this rule exists or feel as though it’s too pretentiously courteous to actually do it. But take my word: this says SO much about you, and as you walk around to the driver’s side to join her, she will sit in your car bubbling over with joy. You will have set the tone for the entirety of the date.

2. Act happy.

Nobody likes a moody sourpuss. Unless both parties are moody sourpusses (sourpi?), because misery loves company and all that stuff. Males often believe that girls like mysterious, brooding men, so they speak very little and talk mostly with their eyes and seductive half-smile smirks. This works if you’re pursuing a one-night rendezvous, but anything beyond that requires your true personality to shine through. Smiling is contagious, and people gravitate towards those with upbeat, joyful personalities. Act like you’re happy to be with your girl (which is much easier if you actually are happy to be with her) so that she absorbs your happy vibes and projects them back onto you. You will be a blissful couplet of smiling faces prancing around glowing with delight.

3. Pay for her.

I took my boyfriend out for a congratulatory dinner one time because he got a new job. I told him I wanted to pay. I begged him to let me pay. Guess who ended up paying? “It’s just how things are done. You’re my girl,” he said, signing the check, and then I fainted into the breadbasket.

This causes many fights in many relationships. It’s hard when two people who don’t have the means to spend a lot go on dates that require spending. But, guys, if you can afford to pay for the date, do it. It is such a sweet, genuine gesture that shows her that you care about her. It tells her that money isn’t something that she’ll have to worry about with you, and that spending time with her is such a delight that no amount of dollars and cents can lessen the happiness it brings you. If you end up marrying the girl, it’ll all be worth it; if you don’t, it’s worth it for your reputation as a Really Great Guy.

It is such a relief for the girl knowing that he’s probably going to pay, and there’ll be no awkward “So, about the bill…” moments. Not because she can’t afford it, or because she told him to, but because he wants to treat her — because he thinks she deserves it.
Now girls, this doesn’t mean that you’re off the hook. Offer to pay sometimes; it’s only fair. If he’s like my boyfriend and actually refuses to let you pay, make up for it in other ways later, like buying him a package of double stuff Oreos, beef jerky or some other #ManFood. Don’t let his chivalry go unnoticed.

4. Put your phone away.

This cannot be stressed enough. If you want your girl to be with you, act like you want to be with her. Checking your phone throughout the date is a nonverbal way of saying, “I am more interested this little box of false reality than looking at your face.” Make sure she knows that’s not true; put your phone in your coat, man purse, shoe, what have you. Just get it out of your face and look at hers. Be engaged in the moment.

5. Introduce her to your best friends.

After you’ve been on a few dates and you’ve covered the background bases (where she’s from, what she likes, what she does for work/school), take her over to meet the guys. If she’s a guy’s girl (S/O to my fellow tomboys), she will LOVE meeting your friends. She’ll want your friends to be her friends. She’ll leave thinking that if guys who are that cool hang out with you, then by association, you must also be cool. This is a pretty subconscious thought but it definitely runs through her mind. If she’s not a guy’s girl, it’s still a good idea. Meeting your friends will show her what you’re like with your buds, what your personality is like in a different context, and (most likely) your true sense of humor. And it’s a great warmup for #6.

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How to Talk to Girls You Don't Know

Every guy has been in the same position at some point in his life: He sees an attractive girl and wants to strike up a conversation, but he's just too afraid or nervous to waltz up and jump right in. The more beautiful the girl, the more difficult it is. Yet for many men, just talking to any girl he doesn't know can be an ordeal worse than giving a public speech. This need not be the case, however, because once you know a few rules of thumb, there is no girl in the world you can't approach.

STEP 1
Approach the girl armed without fear of rejection. If you are rejected, depending on your taste, there are still other potential dates. Rejection does not mean the end of your dating life, but staying focus on the fear of rejection can limit your confidence Don't fear rejection -- embrace the possibility of acceptance.

STEP 2
Learn the secret of confidence. When walking up to talk to a girl, exude confidence. Walk with your shoulders back and look her in the eye as you approach. Talk without fumbling and mumbling, no matter how nervous you are. Confidence shows that you are assured in yourself, but also sends the message that you are certain that you're interested in a girl you're approaching.


STEP 3
Make a girl laugh -- if you do so, you can get her to talk to you all night long. Many women admire a man that can make her laugh. Making a girl laugh is more about peppering the conversation with witty observations than telling jokes. You must learn to integrate your humor into the flow of conversation by making funny remarks about what she says and humorous comments about your surroundings.

STEP 4
Give an original compliment to spark interest. Be creative. Approaching after you have heard her laugh gives you the perfect opportunity to tell her what a great laugh she has, but be sure to have something funny to follow it up with so you get her to laugh again. Comparing a girl to a great beauty can be dicey, so you don't want to tell a girl she looks like a certain celebrity if she thinks that celebrity isn't attractive.

STEP 5
Act like a gentleman. While it is true that there's a girl out there for every guy and deviant behavior is all around, the odds are in your favor if you act like a nice guy instead of a total jerk. A gentleman isn't crass or crude, and he treats a girl with respect. The odds are also in your favor that a healthy helping of the guys who have approached this girl in the past were less than classy, so you have that going for you.

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6 Best Topics to Talk About With a Girl

1. Books, Movies, Music and Art

Let’s face it. You’re not going to have a woman bearing her soul to you and sharing her hopes, dreams and deepest fears with you from the get go. You’ll need to build a whole lot of comfort and rapport before you get there. This is why you need a few conversational topics that are low effort and still engaging to get things started. Getting a woman talking about her favorite books, movies, music or art is a great way to do so.

The trick here, however, is to not ask for too little. For example, if a woman tells you that she loves music, don’t just ask her what her favorite band is. Ask her for two songs from her favorite band that she thinks you should listen to and ask her what those two songs mean to her. Or if a woman tells you that she loves to read, instead of just asking her who her favorite author is ask her to recommend a book to you and get her to tell you what it’s about.

Not only will this allow you to coax her into putting more conversational effort into your interaction, but it’ll also help you find out things that you both are into.

woman reading

2. Relationships

I swear to God, relationship related topics are like conversational crack for most women. And if there’s one thing that women love more than hearing relationship stories, it’s coming up with solutions to relationship problems.

So the next time you hear about your little cousin’s problems with her boyfriend, or hear about your roommate complain about his overly possessive girlfriend, make a mental note of the story and use it in conversation. You’ll be surprised with just how into these topics women can get.

3. The People Around You

Sometimes I hear a lot of guys complain saying that they run out of topics to talk about when they’re with a girl that they’re interested in. But here’s the thing. If you pay close attention to your surroundings the chances are that you’ll find more than enough conversational ammunition to last a whole day.

For example, there’s a fun little game that I love playing with girls that I’m out on dates on. I call it the “what’s their story” game. When you’re out on a date with a girl, pick a stranger at random and talk about what you imagine what their story must be like. And then ask your date to tell you her version. Once she gets the hang of it start getting more and more imaginative and ridiculous with your stories. I guarantee that you’ll both have a blast.

4. Travel

Whenever I’m interacting with a woman I always try to direct the conversation in a direction that’s fun and imaginative. I hate conversations that drab and uninteresting. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned through my experiences with women is that talking about travel always gets them feeling happy and excited.

You see, people love to travel, and those who aren’t able to travel daydream about having either the time or the money to do it. The key here, again, is to ask for more than just an impersonal list of travel destinations.

Ask her where the most exciting place she’s travelled to was and what she loved about it. Or ask her where she would go if she could disappear for an entire month without having to worry about her work or any other responsibilities. These types of conversations will get her imagination firing on overdrive and put her in an uplifted emotional state; both feelings which she will start associating with you.

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5. Observations About Her

There’s a school of thought among some men who teach attraction skills that a guy should never compliment or show interest in a woman. I disagree. I believe that to truly attract and seduce a woman you need to make her feel as if she’s won you over. To do this you need to find out things about her that are unique and appreciate them. Being curious about women can significantly improve your dating life!

You see, a woman’s observational skills are often much more keenly tuned than a man, and being with a man who notices things that other men usually don’t will have a powerful effect on her.

Does she have a fashion sense that you hardly ever get to see on other women? Does she circle words that she thinks sound cute when she’s reading? Let her know that you notice these things and ask her about them. And when she tells you these stories let her know that you find these things attractive about her.

6. Her Passions, Her Dreams and Her Goals

Do you remember the last time someone showed genuine interest in your dreams and goals? It’s always such a nice feeling to talk about things that you are passionate about with a person who’s genuinely interested in these things. And here’s the cool thing. Once you’ve built up a certain level of trust and rapport with a woman, all you need to do to find out these things about her is to ask.

You see, sometimes being a great conversationalist is like learning to become a mirror. The point isn’t to grope about blindly in search of things that your conversational partner to talk about.

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How to Talk to a Beautiful Woman
By: Chris | Get free more on Palmchat: www.palmchatnow.com
How to Talk to a Beautiful Woman

[Thanks to reader and Fierce Gentleman Chris Behrens for submitting this guest post! – Andrew]

We’ve all been there in the moment – looking at her as she’s looking at you, and not having the slightest idea what to say next. You smile, she smiles, and then – nothing. The moment passes, someone else captures her attention, and the moment is lost – the opportunity to connect is lost. Connection is what we want, whether it’s as simple as a meaningful conversation, or as grand as a lifetime together. This connection is why we endure the rapid heartbeat, the dry mouth, the stuttering and the awkward silences.

This desire to connect is what you must focus on – when you focus on the connection, what should happen next becomes easier. Imagine if, rather than being at a party or another social situation, you were HIRED by an eccentric millionaire to walk up to a woman and connect with her – connect with what she does for a living, what she’s passionate about, maybe just what kind of movies she likes. What would you do then?

Of course, the millionaire paid you to CONNECT with her, not merely interrogate her, so this involves offering something up of yourself. Once you find this point of contact, then you can share a little bit of yourself and deepen the connection. So, the first problem you’re solving when talking to a beautiful woman is:
FINDING A POINT OF COMMON CONNECTION. . . THAT SHE CARES ABOUT

This is the premise behind pick-up lines, and while they generally fail so spectacularly, unless they’re played for a laugh – the premise is that the point of connection is the woman’s vanity: I recognize that you’re attractive, and I’m going to assume that that’s something you’re really caught up in. It’s a big lose-lose – a pick-up line won’t work on the woman you want to connect with, and the woman that it WILL work on, you probably don’t want to connect with in the first place.
ASKING QUESTIONS

Only she knows what she’s passionate about, and you need to find it out. You find out by asking questions…but what questions?

Start with, Hi, I’m Joe (shake hands), and then:

So what’s your story?
I’m here tonight because (single sentence explanation that requires no follow-up). What brings you here?

That’s about as broad a net as can be cast. Ideally, you have a common social context from which to take a cue, such as being at the same school, or place of work, or church.

Pro-tip: Be careful not to ask “Do you come here often?” There’s nothing inherently wrong with that question, but that specific formulation is a very tired pick-up line. You can express the same sentiment with “How long have you been coming here” or something similar.
PROCEED FROM THE GENERAL TO THE SPECIFIC

It’s important to not box yourself in too early in a conversation. If you have that specific social context to work from you can use that, but be careful. For example, in a coffee shop:

You: Hi, I’m Joe (shakes hands). What are you drinking?

Beautiful woman: Uh, it’s a cappuccino.

You: …uh, those are great. (Silence)

Beautiful woman: (Smiles) Well, gotta go…

What might have gone better is this:

You: Hi, I’m Joe (shakes hands). I’m grabbing a coffee in between classes. Same with you?

Beautiful woman: Actually, I just got off work.

You: Ah…where do you work?

Beautiful woman: I actually just started a job at this law firm…

And there you go.

Here’s another example of the wrong way to do it, and the right way to fix it:

In the lobby outside a movie (afterwards)

You: Hi, I’m Joe (shakes hands). I really love the films of Wes Anderson. What did you think of the Royal Tenebaums?

Beautiful woman: I just came here with a friend…is that the director of the movie?

You: Yeah, the writer and the director. He’s got a really idiosyncratic, hand-crafted style…

Beautiful woman: (no idea what you’re talking about) Sure. Well, nice talking to you…

And better:

You: Hi, I’m Joe (shakes hands). Did you enjoy the film?

Beautiful woman: It was kind of out there for me.

You: Yeah, this filmmaker can be pretty wild, I guess he can be kind of an acquired taste. I’m pretty into film…how about you?

Beautiful woman: A bit, I guess. I really liked Rio 2.

You: You like animated films?

And so on. You’ve now moved from the general to the specific, but on terms that she cares about. She is more likely to be willing to contribute the effort required to make the connection now.

You might notice that in the both examples above, we had kind of a false start – we both saw the same movie, you enjoyed it, and it wasn’t her scene. What happened was that we started too specifically (which, of course, was natural – it would be weird to walk out of a movie and ask “uh, do you like movies?”). The fix is to tack back to the general.

Pro-tip: As you can see, I prefer going straight for the handshake. It’s a little bold, but it prevents you from starting with a line that will turn her off. If it feels too bold for the situation, you can save it for later.

Bonus pro-tip: This is a tough one to pull off, but if some time has passed, and you’re feeling a connection, you can storm the castle with:

“So we’ve talked about your job, your x and your y…what are you really passionate about?”

The big risk here is that she’s really passionate about her job, x or y, and you’ve missed that, and it comes off as dismissive. But if it works, it works big. Don’t even consider using this until the second hour of conversation.
SLAYING NEEDINESS

There’s a great line in the movie Broadcast News where a lonely man asks “Wouldn’t this be a great world if insecurity and desperation made us more attractive?”

It’s a powerful observation because it illuminates the nature of what psychologists call “social proof”. A financial corollary to this is “banks only lend money to people who can afford to pay it back”. If we enter into a conversation sending the message that we desperately need to connect (even though we do – every single one of us, though maybe not at the same moment), this is a sign to others that we have trouble connecting. So while our need to connect is true, that time when we’re forging that fragile first connection is not the time to share it.

Just as you move from the general to the specific, share yourself in the same way, a piece at a time. Treat your vulnerability as a prize that she has to earn, just as you have to earn hers. Don’t, unless the social context emphasizes (and maybe not, even then) talk about politics or religion. Don’t spill your heart out to her in the first ten minutes you meet her – that part of your self is too valuable to be traded so coarsely. Treat the interaction as an opportunity to explore whether, when and how much of yourself you’re going to share.
PLAY IT SMART

A lot of communication with a woman is non-verbal. If she’s wearing headphones, if she’s talking on the phone, if she’s in the middle of a conversation with a friend, it’s probably not the right moment. If you’re nervous, you will tend to speak more and faster than you would ordinarily…slow down, and allow there to be space in the conversation. A pause need not be an awkward one, and it can give her the opportunity to contribute energy to the interaction.

Finally, if the connection just doesn’t happen, conclude the conversation gracefully and count the interaction as a skill-development exercise. Keep in mind that a woman can be socially awkward (or downright rude) in how she handles this – just let it go. You don’t need to set her straight – you don’t need anything more from her. Here are sample conclusions in ascending order of terseness:

Her: Well, I’ve got to get going.

You: It’s been a pleasure talking with you. Have a nice night.



Her: I’m sorry, but I’m dating someone…

You: Fair enough. It’s been nice talking with you.



OR, if you didn’t have any romantic intentions:

You: I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to give you that impression. I won’t take up any more of your time.

Her: Who the hell are you anyway? My boyfriend is going to…

You: (chuckle) Goodbye.

The key takeaway here is that there is no “zinger”, no snappy insult. Who cares? The ultimate victory is to not need to salvage your wounded pride. Even if it’s not true, even if your pride IS wounded – the most graceful, elegant way to handle it is as if it weren’t.

Pro-tip: Eye contact is a thin line between connection and coming off as a staring psychopath! Look into her eyes long enough to make a note of their color of her eyes, a second or two, and then feel free to unlock.
SPEAKING WITH HEARTFULNESS

Everything I’ve talked about so far has been relentlessly tactical, so we need to step back for a moment and recognize that we’re employing these tactics for the higher purpose of actually establishing the connection. That is to say, we’re not trying to manipulate her, we’re trying to find what it is that we share, and what of ourselves we can share with each other.

A man, once married, instantly becomes better at talking to women, I think. It’s tempting to attribute this to simply having the pressure off, but it’s more complicated than that. The most important thing is that now the man (assuming that he’s a decent and honorable man) has no agenda. The reason why a married man can do this better is that he’s not carrying the additional emotional baggage of trying to get something from the woman.

Have you ever had the experience of slowly realizing that the person you’re talking to is not at all interested in the conversation, but is trying to sell you something? How did that make you feel? No one likes to feel that they’re being manipulated, or being used.
FOCUSING ON HER

A big mistake that men make is trying to impress. Of course you want to impress the woman, but it has to happen organically – if you reel off your resume (or worse, your bank balance), you’ll either fail catastrophically or connect in a problematic way. The key is to try and keep the focus on her. The number one thing that you need to communicate is that you’re interested in her.

You might ask, “didn’t I communicate that by walking over to talk to her?” Not at all – you might be interested only in yourself, and merely using her as a platform for that. You might be interested only in going to bed with her. You might be interested in using her to get over your last girlfriend. It’s complicated – women pick up baggage the same way that we do.

Imaging the coolest, most interesting person you can think of, living or dead – and imagine the general flow of the conversation. How much would you want to talk about yourself, and how much would you want to talk about that person? If I were to have cigars with Winston Churchill, he would leave knowing next to nothing about me.

Pro-tip: don’t take this too far and rebuff a question – remember that this isn’t an interrogation; it’s an attempt to connect. It’s all about energy – share enough of yourself to connect, and focus on learning about her.

On the eve of the election in Great Britain in 1886, a woman dined with the two men vying for the post of Prime Minister, William Gladstone and Benjamin Disraeli. When asked her appraisal of the men, she replied, “After dining with Mr. Gladstone, I thought he was the cleverest person in England. But after dining with Mr. Disraeli, I thought I was the cleverest person in England.” Which would you rather be?