.

Delay the pregnancy in what manner, once is not abortion, drugging etc that will harm the baby, its not a crime or formation of the baby or withdrawal method or condom, Allahu alam

Oh sorry, brother, I only saw this now. And am unfortunately signing off. Tomorrow inshaAllah.

Bismillah wa sallallâhu ala Nabiyy wa salam.

The issue is basically on permissibility or otherwise of refraining from having children after one’s Nikkah.

We must first note the following:
One, that one gets married, when one is qualified, is a practice of the Prophet (sallallâhu ’alayhi wa sallam) there is no room for celibacy (at-Tabatul) in Islam. ‘, Nikkah is my tradition whoever frowns at my tradition is not part of me,’ so said the Prophet (sallallâhu ’alayhi wa sallam) [as reported by Bukhaari and Muslim].

Two, why do we get married? We get married for the following purposes:
To restrain our glances at strange women and to guard our chastity (Bukhaari and Muslim).

And to add to the number of Muslims: the Prophet (sallallâhu ’alayhi wa sallam) said: ‘Marry the loving and productive women, for I will use you to have much number among the Prophets on the Day of Resurrection. ’ [Ahmad reported it, and it is authentic.]

From the hadith shortly mentioned, we can conclude that prospective spouses must be productive ones. That is why some of the scholars, namely Shaykhul-Islam Ibn Taymiyyah declare in ‘Majmuu Fatawa’ that it is haram for any person who cannot produce to go into a marriage.

Therefore one of the urges for Nikkah is to have one’s children, in fact to love that.

However the Asl (the basis) of a Nikkah is to have Istim’taa (enjoyment) with one‘s spouse. This is reflected in the hadith first quoted.
But both the Istim’taa and having children can be combined. In fact, it is like that. No scholar has ever said that a couple should have children will affect their enjoyment of each other. Children are even part of enjoyment of a marriage. Ask me.
So the brother’s fear that having children immediately after his Nikkah may make him not to have enough enjoyment of his wife, this notion may not be correct. Why? You have not had the experience. Ask those who are married whether that is how it is. Rather it is the contrary. In Yoruba land, for instance (I do not know your tribe, but I think universality aspect of culture can justify that), if a wife after the first six months of marriage with her husband has not shown any sign of pregnancy, people will begin to wonder if there is no problem with either of the couple. This is why this unislamic practice of pregnancy before marriage is on the increase around the place.

And the second aspect of the fear that he is not ready to run around for marriage challenges is not well-placed too. One, having children is not the only challenges of marriage. Do you think it is? What if after your marriage your wife falls sick in a terrible way (in Allaah we seek refuge from that), what will you do? You will divorce her? Because you have not planned for all those ‘wahala.’

Brother you should rather have your trust in Allaah and go ahead with your Nikkah, and have your beautiful kids, Insha Allaah. Allaah will suffice you.
As for the issue of using contraception, it is generally permissible. The evidence for that is that Jabir said they (the Sahabah) used to do Azl (coitus interruputus) while the Qur’ân was being revealed. What that purports is that if it were wrong, the Qur’aan would have prohibited it. And that does not obviate the fact that it is a ‘Wa’d Khafiyy,’ (a mild infanticide), especially when it is abused or when it is done for every flimsy reason.

The scholars however used the Jabir’s story, among others, as the basis for making the use of contraceptives permissible.
And scholars have advised that advice of qualified Muslim medical practitioners should be sought as regard this. Some contraceptives impair the health, you should know that.

And Shaykh al-Uthaymin (may Allaah have mercy on him) clarified in ‘the Natural Blood of Women’ that it is permissible when the health of the woman or the foetus is in danger. That is, it is not used for every flimsy reason.

As for the permissibility or otherwise of your intended action, that is for scholars to settle. I am a learner. What I have given can only serve as advice. Insha Allaah if you permit me, I shall post your question around and see if there is any other beneficial thing on the matter.
I just hurriedly put this together lest I forget.
All perfection goes back to Allaah.

May Allaah forgive me for any shortcoming therein.

I am your brother Ishaaq bn A. (abulbanaat1427@gmail.com).

Abuzola:

Delay the pregnancy in what manner,  once is not abortion, drugging etc that will harm the baby, its not a crime or formation of the baby or withdawal method or condom, Allahu alam

Salam,

May Allah, the Exalted, bless you, abdulbanaat, for such an erudite posting.

@Arkison,

What method do you specifically prepare yourselves to employ in delaying the child birth/pregnacy? I think thats the case in point now.

.

Arkison:

@ Muhsin

I don't know yet, we are still discussing it, I want to know that what I am doing is right first. I am not religiously learned, but I do not completely believed with what our Malam told me.

I am not also that reliously learned; but a common student.

I just want to get married. I am tied, I just cannot continue like this. . .

This is very good, at least that will help you protect and guard your gaze, movement with other girls and the likes.

What is the purpose of marriage? Is it to produce children only? What about stopping fitna?

I think brother abdulbanaat has answered this. It encompasses all these reasons and even much more.

I know the prophet said for those that cannot afford to marry, they should fast rather than castration.

True. But doing the marriage is more encouraged.

For me, at the moment I can afford the marriage expenses and base on my current income I can provide for myself and wife for the moment. Any additional expenses will put too much pressure on my finances, accommodation and other things. I am working and studying at the same time, while I want to enroll her into school immediately ASUU resume strike.

Sincerely don't fear children will make you poor. Allah, the Exalted, says:[center]
"Do not slay your children for the fear of poverty. We shall provide for them and for you." (Qur'an 17:31)[/center]

Even in a case where one is already poor, the Qur'an insists that Allah, the Exalted, will provide sustenance for us and for our children, and furthermore that Allah has made human life sacred. (See Qur'an 6:151).

Also, if it is about children, what can you people say about the way our people marry and just give birth to many children, while, logically, you know a man cannot afford to feed them, cloth them and pay for their education. Kawai, you see people going from one house to another house beging. This is very common in the North. Haba!

This is wrong. The Prophet, may Allah exalt his mention, would only be proud of his people if these people were on the right path. Begging is greatly denounced; its even disallowed in Islam.

I mean can't somebody plan the way he want his life to be? Is it again Islam for somebody to have a long term planning, with regard to how he want to live his life.

As I said above, that depend upon how you wanna do that planning. There is whats called AZALU, i.e. a practice done by the Prophet's Companions to "prevent" their wives from getting pregnancy. Will elaborate on that, inshaAllah, shortly.

And Allah knows best.

Salam,

Here is one nice book I got for you titled THE ETIIQUETTES OF MARRIIAGE AND WEDDIING
by Sheikh Muhammed Nasirudeen al-Albanee.

*Edit*

It can't be uploaded, for its too large, the system says. Let me get your e-mail so that I can send you the book.

@Arikson.

Yes a Muslim ought to plan his life; he ought to know how he spends the days of his life.
But a fact remains that whatever plan we might have for ourselves, Allaah has another. It is the fear of the Unseen that often haunts us. As I said in my earlier post, if we put our trust in Allaah, Allaah will suffice us. Allaah says:
“, And whosoever fears Allâh and keeps his duty to Him, He will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty). And He will provide him from (sources) he never could imagine. And whosoever puts his trust in Allâh, and then He will suffice him. Verily, Allâh will accomplish his purpose. Indeed Allâh has set a measure for all things.” [Talaaq: 1-3].

Trust in Allaah does not mean one should not make effort; but it is trust in Allaah that often brings blessing to our efforts. None of us is perfect except he that Allaah gives a tip of perfection.
You are working and schooling. That is an effort, just pray to Allaah to bless your effort. The tone of your comment suggests you want to doubt the Might and Power of Allaah (in Allaah we seek refuge). Brother, never you feel so.

In fact the condition you are, that is, whereby you are desperate for a Nikkah, is such that you can beg Allaah with, and Allaah will grant your supplication.

Allaah has said;

“And marry those among you who are single (i.e. a man who has no wife and the woman who has no husband) and (also marry) the Sâlihûn (pious, fit and capable ones) of your (male) slaves and maid-servants (female slaves). If they be poor, Allâh will enrich them out of His Bounty. And Allâh is All-Sufficient for His creatures' needs, All-Knowing (about the state of the people).” [Nuur: 32].

And the Prophet of Allaah has said, on the authority of Abu Hurairah:
‘There are three categories of people that Allaah has taken it up as a duty upon Himself to help: He that gets married because he wants to remain chaste, a slave who has entered a contract of manumission (al-Mukaatabah) with his master and who is will to fulfil the term of the contract and a Mujaahid in the Path of Allah.’ [Reported by Imam Ahmad, Trimidhi, Nasai and Ibn Maajah. Imam Al-Albaani said it is Hasan (sound)].

Abubakr was reported to have said: ‘O people hearken to Allaah in what He has commanded you as regard Nikkah and He will fulfil His Promise (of enriching you).’ [Tafseer Ibn Kathir, Vol III p.420, DaarulArabiyyah].

And Ibn Mas’uud said: ‘Seek enrichment through Nikkah’ [Tafseer Ibn Kathir, Vol III p.420, DaarulArabiyyah].

But everything goes down to Faith – Imaan. If you sincerely believe in the Word of Allaah then go ahead. But remember to keep your duty to Allaah, by obeying His Commandments and shunning His prohibition.

If not to take much of time, I would have shared my own personal experience as regard Nikkah with you. It is no big deal anyway, we thank Allaah.

May Allaah assist you.

Your brother in Islam, Ishaaq.

.

@Arkison,

You are welcome. And may He bless you too.

You'll receive my message very soon, inshaAllah.

You are most welcome too, Arikson.

@Muhsin, Yaya Mutane Kano? Sanunku.

LOL I only saw this reply now, abdulbanaat.

Muna lafiya.