benedictac:

I can see where the agony is coming from. Is either there is no man to marry u or u are a divorcee or u are presently passing thru hell in that marrriage

If it makes you feel better my dear, assume away

benedictac:

Dont give up Dear. Let's learn to say the truth no matter how hurt it is. Are we still friends?

This thread is not about me or you but about a woman in an abusive and mentally hurtful marriage, i understand your logic of trying to save her marriage but i think its unfair that you advocate that she suffer mental torture just to please someone who obviously does not love and respect her. I love to see people happy and married but she is in obvious pain, think about her first, how bad she feels. Do you know what it feels like for a man or a woman you love and trusted enough to stand before God and take a vow to turn around and beat, ignore and mistreat you? Think about that. All am saying is that she should take time off and clear her head, before she goes crazy. She is going through the worst moment of her life right now thats why she came for help, she can not be suffering and smiling, it will make her go crazy.

@ OP - you have the most importanat thing job that makes u self sufficient . things can only go downhill from here if u decide to stay with your husband. forget all that noise about praying etal - best to damn the societal stigma and leave. you are still young - just accept that it was a bad decison and move on


at least there are no kids(?)

all the best

Didn't you noticed some of this behaviour before you married him, you must have noticed some.

If a man beats his wife for any reason he is a COWARD, its a tough one and my only advice is to cry out to God for solution

Benedict you need to repent. Stop pulling out the scriptures that benefit your selfish and wicked ideas. The same Bible you quote says that faith without works is dead. If she likes let her pray with sack cloth and ashes from now till tomorrow. She needs to take action or her faith is completely useless. If a man is hitting her then a trial separation is the way to go. The same God that is powerful enough to answer her prayers in that house will answer it even if she is in an igloo in Antarctica.
Most men who kill their wives do not plan it out. In a fit of rage they hit her and she falls just the right way and dies or they punch her in the head and a few hours later she is dead. You have the mentality of someone that is very capable of inflicting injury on a woman. I am married so do not think that you can pick on me like you are picking on Aisha because you assumed she is not married. You do not have to be married to have common sense

Thank you guys 4all ur contributions. For those of u that thought this story was framed up, i dont blame una cos its really ridiculous for a man to do all this to a lady he claimed to love n took 2d alter. All things bin equal, i have  resign my faith to God. Maybe he has better plans 4me. Let me wait as time roll by n c wat God has in stock 4me. But if d kitchen becomes too hot, then will have no other option than leaving before i get burnt to ashes. Pls 4d guys out there who treat their wives d same, or even in anyway dat will hurt dem, pls desist 4rm d act.  it gives us women psychological problems. I dont really blame women who beat back/ fight their husbands cos i believe men really fear n repect d hardened ladies rather than d soft ones.

AgoT:

Thank you guys 4all your contributions. For those of u that thought this story was framed up, i dont blame una cos its really ridiculous for a man to do all this to a lady he claimed to love n took 2d alter. All things bin equal, i have resign my faith to God. Maybe he has better plans 4me. Let me wait as time roll by n c wat God has in stock 4me. But if d kitchen becomes too hot, then will have no other option than leaving before i get burnt to ashes. Pls 4d guys out there who treat their wives d same, or even in anyway dat will hurt dem, pls desist 4rm d act. it gives us women psychological problems. I dont really blame women who beat back/ fight their husbands cos i believe men really fear n repect d hardened ladies rather than d soft ones.

AgoT,
U still dey promote this your M&B story?
I thought u said u were going to take ur drugs and calm down?
Was the drug not effective? Pls u may wanna try something stronger to calm ur nerves oh.

BTW, u may try publishing your book. Gudluck.

@ Poster, I am sorry about your situation ,how come you dated him for 2 good years and didnt seem to know him well enough? its sad if he was good during courtship and then changed just 2 months into your marriage.

I personally can not live with any man that lay his hand on me. i think your husband is cheating period . he probally was seeing the lady before he got married to you and still continue´s the afair.

Every marriage has its ups and downs its not a bed of roses ,if you truelly want your marriage to work you have to get closer to God,i think consuelling could help but if that doesnt work then a trail seperation would be good if its possible to go and stay with your parents for a while and during that time use it and go for prayers and deliverance for your husband and marriage ,there is nothing God cant do or change.

Or stay in your matrimonial home and go for prayers and deliverance from there to avoid him bringing another woman in while your gone,during this period do everything in your power to avoid argument with him and dont question his movement.

If you´ve tried all this things and they prove abortive ,then you can now decide if you want to live your marriage or not,no one will make that decision for you but yourself but let it be that you´ve tried your best to make it work.

The day my loving husband of over 10 yrs lays his hand on me is the day i will have his name replaced with my father's name. I have seen a man beat his wife and mistakenly killed her, arrested by police, went to court and bla bla bla and guess what? He is actually married to another lady now though a changed man but the lady is far gone, no be me.

wakagirl:

The day my loving husband of over 10 yrs lays his hand on me is the day i will have his name replaced with my father's name. I have seen a man beat his wife and mistakenly killed her, arrested by police, went to court and bla bla bla and guess what? He is actually married to another lady now though a changed man but the lady is far gone, no be me.

wowzers! 

@nezed, u feel ds a sort of M&B story? ds is one tin i dnt like in pple. smbody bin serious n he/she will b taken 4 granted!!!!! n d best u wld ve done nezed was 2go to anoda topic wen u knew u had nothin 2contribute. ur contributions wld ve bin invalid anyway, Benedictac am proud of u. tnx 4 sacificing ur time to locate me. God bless u. N 2all who gave me d genuine advice i needed, God bless.

he desnt respct you. if you wantto stay then you are goin to need 3rd party help. counseling or evn speak to his parents for help

Christianity is at it again by benedicta the wrong adviser,brainwashing people to eternal dammnation all in the name of keeping a marraige,so benedicta is saying the poster should risk her life all because of that BEASTY HUBBY all in the name of JESUS,I wonder when people will learn, fine Almighty GOD hate divorce but at the same time not when your life is at stake,the best thing is to defend herself by divorce,cos she may lose her life in the process of trying to save that already broken marriage

@poster, i really do feel for you o, sorry, but pls dnt listen to wrong advise,use your brain and discern well,leave the marriage and give a better man a chance in your life when you find one, THIS LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO GET SAD, If you like, follow that your sister BENEDICTER'S ADVICE let her ruin you o

@ Poster,

Did you father and mother consult this guy before they concieve you?

You owe no one your life.

I am relatively young, not married yet, but I will soon get married. In few months time. And I told my gf, over the years people change. Nothing is permanent. Life change, attitudes change, even love change. You might love me for who I am today, but I will not be that person tomorrow. I might love for who you are today but you wont be that person tomorrow. Courtship is completely diferent from marriage. You have seen my good side. But my bad side will only be conspicious to you when we are married. Your life and happiness is more important than your love for me. Therefore at any material time in our marriage if you think you cannot cope with living with me, move on. If I die before I marry, you will fall in love with someone, probably who have the same name with me, and tell him all the nice things you are telling me today.

Why do people cling to impossiblities? For Godsake we make friends and change them depending on the condition of life and necessities.

U owe no one your life. Nor your father, mother, brother let alone a stupid stranger that didn't know when you use to shit in your pampers, phelm following on your nice pink shirt and crying all night.

If you were my sister and you tell me this story, I will lock you up in a room and give u a beaten of your life. It seems you enjoy the beaten.

Men are fickle. If somebody beat you today and you forgive him, nothing can stop him beating you again. Once the forbidden line is cross, it can be crossed, and crossed and crossed again.