The Effect Of Patience - Romance - Nairaland
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| The Effect Of Patience by honour99: 5:30pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
hey guys I wanna post a poem |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by honour99: 5:40pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
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The Effect of Patience In the majesty of her glory She lifted up the veil Behold the most fabulous woman on earth I said in my mind Oh! What a beauty! She approached me and talked to me It felt like I was talking to an angel I felt her presence like the Holy spirit I said again in my mind Oh!what a beauty She talked to me I anticipated our wedding(in my imagination) Her scent was like a memory wipe I forgot all about my past life And focused on her lips like my life depends on it Then I said once again Oh!what a beauty! I breathed in her scent And I was intoxicated by her love I so wanted her now and now I told her What a beauty How disappointed was I when she revealed to me That she was taken I became aback Wondering why beautiful ladies always have guys I said in a dejected disappointed tone Oh No! What a beauty! I felt elated once more after three days When she told me that she and her guy were not in good terms I felt a ray of hope shinnin across my face once more Planning and scheming I decided to wait till d followin day So it wont look like I was waiting fr dem to break up The second day came I texted her and greeted her like every other day We chatted normally and I asked her about her guy................... Hmmmmn,her reply was devastating,heartbreaken,jaw opening and anger creating She dropped it like a grenade I caught it bfr I knew what it was Oh my God! She was back wit her guy.........oh.........so bad I instantly felt cold shivers on my skin I became really upset and uptight with my self Thinking about the devastating news If only had I known her guy would come back......... Now, I couldnt help but say it out loud That the effect of patience isn't always good. THE END By Olowosoyo Honour... |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by honour99: 5:42pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
honour99: |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by Presh900(m): 7:49pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
lemme encourage you with a comment |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by bamisepeters(m): 8:26pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
Presh900:seconded with a LOL... |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by Presh900(m): 8:37pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
. |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by DavidTheGeek: 10:42pm On Oct 08, 2016 |
Well done. Next time space it. It looks like a story. (NOTE: I understand the use of run-on-lines) ....When she told me that she and her guy were not in good terms I felt a ray of hope shinnin across my face once more Planning and scheming I decided to wait till d followin day So it wont look like I was waiting fr dem to break up Really? You no even give her some space make she heal from the break up, you don wan rush am! Haba bros! She'd have rejected your proposal anyway. Point is: Next time, make it more realistic. Something like 6months - 1 year would be better to show "you waited for too long". Hence "too much patience is bad". Comment: Your poem is good. I enjoyed reading it. Take time to improve on yourself. The more you write, the better you get. Also read other people's poems. I'm a poet too  |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by honour99: 11:27pm On Oct 10, 2016 |
Presh900:thanks for the corrections,I will work on them. |
| Re: The Effect Of Patience by Presh900(m): 6:41am On Oct 11, 2016 |
honour99:Which Correction?? No be me correct you abeg |
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