I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease - Family - Nairaland
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| I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 7:40am On Oct 12, 2016 |
I have tried so hard to convince myself that maybe it's just my environment, maybe there are faithful married men in other parts of the country. 95 % of married Nigerian men cheat on their wives atleast once, while from the 5%, 3% have not cheated because the opportunity has not presented itself yet, and only 2% are actually faithful to their wives. I often hear statements like "men are naturally polygamous", a nairalander once said "if you can't bear your husband cheating on you,then don't get married", but I ask myself just how much do you have to bear?, a distant relative lost her life because her husband infected her with hiv, she knew he was philandering, but what could she do?,now both her and her husband are dead, it's been years, sometimes I see the kids and i just feel awful, if a man cheats, women have always have that big heart to forgive and move on,but when a man gives his wife disease, it means that man not only lacks self control but is STUPID as well 51 Likes 3 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Newbeginnings(m): 9:42am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Most men cheat... because the women allow it.... simple... If a man loves a woman dearly and she does not allow him to cheat, he will never ever ever cheat 58 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by TheArchangel(f): 9:47am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Are you going to wait for him to give you disease? Cheating can ead to someone contracting a disease. They are both unacceptable. 35 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by misspicy(f): 9:59am On Oct 12, 2016 |
The best thing is to go into marriage with an open mind and also know who you are getting married to. Some women due to pressure and poverty will marry just any man to be called a 'mrs' even if they are very aware of his philandering ways,then start complaining after a few years. I go with OP on this though,cheat all you can,na you get your d*ck but don't bring diseases to me. Women are adviced to forget 'society factor' and do what makes them happy,recipe for living long 26 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 10:17am On Oct 12, 2016 |
TheArchangel:they are both unacceptable, but considering the Nigerian factor, what else can a woman do than to keep forgiving, or you think the 95% of the cheating husbands don't know about their husband's exploits?, maybe an introduction of condoms on the part of the wife for her own protection will be better but watch it as the Nigerian man will call family meeting on your head and turn it around in his favor, and trust Nigerian culture to favor him too 13 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 10:32am On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged: One of the reasons why men cheat is that they can get away with it. And with the title of this thread, you encourage it. 34 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 10:42am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mindfulness:I am not encouraging it, but can you tell me exactly how society has discouraged it?,a man cheats on you,as a woman you move out with your children only for the same society to tell you that you are over reacting and that all men cheat.In Nigeria a man can cheat on his wife,when she speaks up she will be the one to get thrown out with her children, with nothing, maybe if divorce laws were reviewed to atleast cater for the woman as obtained in developed countries that could curb it,but for now, both our culture and religion has placed the woman at a disadvantage 31 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 10:59am On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged: Don't wait for the society to change, be the change yourself. Get an education before even thinking of marriage so that you are independent and tell prospective suitors that adultery is an absolute deal breaker to you. Say what you mean and mean what you say. I am tired of women complaining all the time. If they want changes, they have to make them but instead of getting involved or at least interested in politics (where laws are made and passed), they will rather watch Telemundo. 81 Likes 7 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 11:08am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mindfulness:and Mr man did I tell you I don't have an education?, even PhD holders still get cheated on, it's a Nigerian factor that has got nothing to do with education, after all one can imagine that with all the education in this country, in some regions child bride is still common while in some regions the girl child doesnt have an inheritance, so what education are you talking about?, stick to the topic and stop delving into what you know little about 42 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 11:26am On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged: I wasn't talking about you not having an education. I was talking about women who accept cheating and therefore maintain the status quo. You said that society tells them to stay and I say so what? If you are independent, the decision is yours to stay or to leave. If you feel that you can forgive cheating, fine but if you accept it you risk infections and diseases. 33 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 11:34am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Mindfulness:do you also know that in some tribes, women are not allowed to return back to their fathers house after marriage?, do you also know that society tends to shame a woman who leaves her husband for what ever reason?,it's not about being independent, down here, most women are the bread winners of their family, but end up putting up with nasty husbands because culture/religion has made it seem like husband is the crown of a woman, another reason why you see people quick to shame unmarried ladies as if it's a medal, and when one decides to speak against it,she is tagged a feminist 24 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Sirmuel1(m): 11:44am On Oct 12, 2016 |
Disease ke  |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by TheArchangel(f): 12:10pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged:To me, marriage is a business with plans. What will you do if plan A fails? Do you just sit around depressed and hoping for what could've been instead of checking out plan B and C.? Honestly I have my plans in place as I have realised that i won't leave if he cheats especially if there is excess money to swim around in and no affection between us but conjugal relationship will stop cos I value my life. Nice gadgets will replace and we will carry on until one of us is tired of the charade. If he is ' Nigerian' poor then c'est la vie. 2 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 12:17pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
TheArchangel:but I doubt he will agree that a ni man will over look denying him sex,even if he knows it's his fault he will still call family meeting on your head, and accuse you of denying him of what he paid bride price for, at the end of the day don't be surprised if both your family and his family blame you for his philandering, that's the Nigerian factor I am talking about, I don't know how it plays out in other countries in Africa but down here,it can be twisted to even favor him in the end, especially the condom part, he can even say it's an opportunity for you to use condoms for other men 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by missjo(f): 12:21pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged:Whatever you choose to forgive OR choose not to,is your decision and yours alone. 5 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by TheArchangel(f): 12:26pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged:I don't know who you are associating with or talking to or discussing with but all this your ideas and fears are too farfetched and paranoid. Are you living your life by the dictate of the society? All this you listed can only happen when you have a low self esteem and overly dependent on the man. When you are self sufficient and your impacts are felt my all and sundry whatever family members that attends any of the said meetings being called will be threading on the side of caution. 14 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 12:28pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
TheArchangel:and let me guess PhD holders, masters holders that get cheated on are not self sufficient and have low self-esteem abi? your assumptions are flawed 14 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by TheArchangel(f): 12:33pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged:Whatever you choose. As I do not know the bases of your arguments. Shalom. 3 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 12:35pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
TheArchangel:shalom 1 Like |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by danbrowndmf(m): 12:40pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
[quote author=misspicy post=50130922][/quote]babe Ki L'oun Sele Na? Mo Ri Diary E, Se Ki Se Pe Bobo E Tin Fvck Up? |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by nnamdibig(m): 1:18pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
95% of married men cheat, out of the remaining 5%, 3% have not seen the opportunity to cheat and 2% are faithful........Pls if I may ask you, these cheating married men, do they cheat with animals or men or women? . Will like to know how you come to this your conclusion. 19 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 1:38pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
nnamdibig:show me a Nigerian married man that has never cheated on his wife first 4 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by nnamdibig(m): 1:46pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged: How can I do that? . I know lots of them, happily married and don't look like they will cheat anytime soon. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 1:55pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
nnamdibig:so that means they fall under the 2%,simple |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by nnamdibig(m): 2:00pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
2dugged:. My statistics from here shows that faithful men are way more than 2%. They are about 80% - 90%. So stop this your assumptions. Or may be give us the statistics of cheating wives. 5 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 2:04pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
nnamdibig:Abeg, e don do, nor let me vex for you o,what is 80 - 90%? we are talking about Nigerian men here,that same ones who always say they are polygamous in nature and that cheating is their inborn trait and they can't help it,so where did 80- 90% come from?, definitely not the Nigerian men in this country 11 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 2:24pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
Why are people acting as if 2dugged is talking nonsense? Are they foreigners or they don't have experience with Nigerian marriages? Why she said is plain truth and what obtains in Nigeria unfortunately. I know a woman personally, my aunts husband whose husband was cheating on her with the female students in the universities he lectures. He even had the audacity to receive phone calls from the girls in the presence of the woman. What didn't she do to change him? She complained to his sister who was the relative he was closest to in the house, told her to talk to the man. She became superwoman with two jobs taking care of finance and housework to prick the man's conscience, she became sullen at home, gave him silent treatment, tried sexy dressing (anytime we went to her house we would meet her wearing small shorts and handless tops and this was an old woman with five children o) she ended up being frustrated and constantly complained at home for him to stop cheating, would even bring herself down to the level of calling the girls to warn them off but the man just continued sleeping around like a shameless dog without caring about the woman's feelings. When she finally called family meetings to report the man and say she wants to end the marriage he started feigning remorse and they told her the same thing they tell all women, that please forgive him, he will change henceforth. Go home and be a good wife to him don't let Satan ruin your home. After the meeting they went home and the man went right back to cheating on her. She gave up and asked for a divorce and he refused saying if she wants to leave she will have to go without the kids because he didn't want to end the marriage she was the only one that wants separation. Today they are living apart and the kids are living with the man but occasionally visit her. All the members of his family are blaming her for the separation saying she is a heartless mother and she could have stayed for her kids. She. She's the heartless one. Not the useless dog of a husband that was exposing his wife to STDs. No. She is the heartless one. During her kids last birthday which was held at the man's house everybody shunned her because they see her as a bad woman that used her own hands to destroy her marriage and abandoned her kids afterwards. This is just one case I talked about here. There are others that I won't write. Leaving a cheating husband in Nigeria will most likely spell humiliation and loss of respect and even children in some cases that's why many women stay in marriage with cheating husbands not because they are not educated or independent. And this trend isn't going to change anytime soon because Nigerian men don't respect women enough to be faithful to them and because many women have refused to fight for themselves and stick together. They would rather fight each other than face the men that cause them difficulties. 43 Likes 4 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by Nobody: 2:31pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
fellis:thank you, this is the Nigerian factor I have been hammering on,in the end society will still find a way to blame the woman for her husband's philandering 12 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by aureen: 2:46pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
The best thing for you to do as an Africa woman is to become very rich like TIWA Savage so that when your hubby decide to cheat and infect you with either STD OR HIV you can leave because you have lots of money starting from 50 million naira upward and the court will grant the custody of the children to the partner that have the financial power. Money answereth all things. Money is a defense. 17 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by misspicy(f): 2:46pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
danbrowndmf:LOL so na boy matter I go carry for head dey do single update for ehn  I just typed how I felt at that moment,thats all,you sha want him to fvck up. Bad belle  2 Likes |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by aureen: 2:51pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
thank you, this is the Nigerian factor I have been hammering on,in the end society will still find a way to blame the woman for her husband's philandering. Why care about a society that does not care about you. Any society that does not care about me, I will never care about that society as well. 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: I Can Forgive A Man That Cheats On Me But Never A Man That Gives Me Disease by danbrowndmf(m): 3:05pm On Oct 12, 2016 |
misspicy:simple question i asked o. Smh. 1 Like |
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