My name is Jennifer. I was born in the suburb of Lagos state. After several attempts on child bearing, my parents had giving up when I was 5; hence I became a loner; an only child. I have been lonely all my life. While growing up, my dad left by 5am to work every morning and my mum was always attending to church businesses. I didn’t haven’t friends so I just stay alone; all by myself. We have never lived alone, like a nuclear family; one relation or the other was always in the house either living with us or paying a visit.

My cousin had come to live with us when I was 5; he quickly became my “brother”.. I was happy, finally am not alone. I was free with him, played with, could confide in him. Then the day came, the day I dread the most; the beginning of my troubles, my dirtiness. My parents had gone out and it was just the both of us in the house. He told me to lay down cos he wants to tickle me… then he said, “open your legs”; then his finger went in between my legs. I didn’t understand what was going on.

Fortunately, and unfortunately, my mum had come home early. while he continued “tickling” me, my mum kept knocking at the door, then she peeped through the door hole and saw what was going on. There was a loud scream and I was quickly asked to dress up. My cousin opened the door; my mum gave me the beating of my life. That was the start of my abuse even as a child.

I became so withdrawn. No idea what the “tickle” meant. I was spanked thoroughly but still don’t know what was wrong about it. So I carried on with my life, avoided my cousin and continued in my lone, solitude life. My mum wasn’t there to talk to me… All I ever wanted was to be truly loved, truly cared for, truly wanted.

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