PREVIEW
My name is Kenneth, my story is about life in a typical naija university as a young and smart young man trying to make a little dough while in school. Since I no get money as capital for business or special skill to use make d money, what else could I have used to make money? Guts and plenty luck, yes my friends, the hustle is real and as jungle don mature, only the fearless will make it.
Journey with me, lemme tell you about the intricacies and complexities involved in been a full time IMPERSONATOR (our English people go sabi this one) or what we call in local parlance "MACHINERY"......
Cc
Swann, Leigh, bibijay123, veekid, skarlett...
Pls invite others, thank you

I am here ride on

Leggo there

Leggo

Nobody invite me....carryon, we dey wait

Tanx y'all for coming through, would try to update as frequent as possible...
Please criticize xonstructively o, I still dey learn

INTRODUCTION
Growing up, I always thought of myself as ordinary, I am a quiet and reserved guy, not much of the friendship kind, always enjoyed my own company (with my headphones)... Finishing secondary school brought a huge sigh of relief and I was looking forward to university education but it took a couple of years after jamming with jamb and overcoming dire financial crisis for me to finally get admission to study computer science in Nnamdi Azikiwe university, Awka, Anambra state.
I always had it in one tiny corner of my mind that "oboi na wetin u know,u go take make money for skul o", how I was gonna achieve this, I really didn't know, it was just there. On the day of my post ume exam, I noticed two things, while queuing outside beautiful gate, d guys who were controlling us (prospective students) were heavily built and carried pump action assault rifle....mehn make I no lie,my mind begin cut from that point o cos I wondered how these guys could carry this kind of weapon with ease.
I later found out those guys were members of the dreaded Anti-cult group/ security personnel, and we were told by old students that its in our best interest to stay away from them and not do anything that will attract their attention because once you are in their bad books,its DOOM....
How was I going to make additional money to compensate for the meager pocket money I got from home?...i asked myself this question everyday but the answer came in the weirdest way........
TBC

Been trying to post the next episode but I keep getting error message. Would keep trying till it goes thru

RIDE ON BRO

I tire o,already typed on my notepad,na to copy and paste remain o. If I paste am here,click submit,it shows an error message,nawa
Bibijay123, creeza, Leigh, veekid, I need yna help o

Gabbyraze:
I tire o,already typed on my notepad,na to copy and paste remain o. If I paste am here,click submit,it shows an error message,nawa
Bibijay1 23, c reeza, Lleigh, vee kid, I need yna help o

do u have a Word processor app?

If none, download wps.

So u can save after typing... It enables editing later if u wish.

And use chrome or maybe uc browser. Hope this helps

Creeza:


do u have a Word processor app?

If none, download wps.

So u can save after typing... It enables editing later if u wish.

And use chrome or maybe uc browser. Hope this helps

I use uc browser and I will definitely download wps sharp sharp, thanks

Dedicated to Leigh, creeza, ASBEE, and jojosweet

THE STEP UP
After 100 level, I had just one friend in my class of about 185, and we had a very smart ass ibo/benin guy as our class rep, his name was chizzy. I hardly talked to him but little did I know we were gonna be partners in crime....
In second semester of yr 1, we did a course, mat102, it wasn't too difficult, just an extension of some topics in further mathematics but ehn the lecturer was a crazy old man who should have retired. After making threatening remarks during lecture days(which I attended just twice), where he said, more than half of us will fail the course (sadistic fellow, he was), time came for exam, I was seated amongst people who I wasn't too familiar with, in utility building, i sha did the questions I knew (N:B: We had over 5 different types of question papers, so your neighbor might not have same questions with you), I used ogboju,(common sense) to answer the rest, submitted and walked away, fairly satisfied.
Fast forward yr 2, I was still my reserved self, always with my headphones blasting rap music, walked into class one morning and met my classmates having a meeting which was heralded by chizzy himself, long and short was that, Mat102 result is out and half the class had F,for my mind I say chei,this winch man don do wetin talk,aniways sha....my friend Becky came to me and said "congrats Ken", I was like,shey I win lottery ni,she just kept smiling like person wey dem dey totori,after the meeting concluded, chizzy approached me and said,"na u b Ken abi,with reg no ****", I said "yea", the he goes "bros how u take do am, who run am for you", I just smiled in ignorance without any inkling of what he was talking about and then he goes, "bros na u get highest for 102 o", I just went blank for a minute and for my mind ehn,I begin cast the lecturer onto say e just make person mind dey cut,after all said and done,chizzy knew I did it myself and as per say we b old bendel people,naso we take become paddy o.
Timetable came out for second semester exams and as i was trying to prepare i got a call from chizzy requesting to see me after class, he asked if I could write phy102 for someone, I told him point blank,"bros I never run this level b4 o" and he said, "forget,na small thing, we go dey together".
I was calm since my guy was gonna be there,and that's how the journey to the land of taking different identities started......
TBC
..

Badoo sneh.
Just blast mth 102 like that ni-
Even with tim bom tim bom style.

I bet that Chizzy is fair and all that sharp, nah fyn fine boiz be doing course rep things.


In my class ,each dept under the faculty ,come and see fine fyn boiz '' Course rep.

WE NOH FINE NAH"

nice 1 Gabbyraze

Creeza:
Badoo sneh.
Just blast mth 102 like that ni-
Even with tim bom tim bom style.

I bet that Chizzy is fair and all that sharp, nah fyn fine boiz be doing course rep things.


In my class ,each dept under the faculty ,come and see fine fyn boiz '' Course rep.

WE NOH FINE NAH"

nice 1 Gabbyraze

Hahaha,d guy fine small but na cunny man and na d kin man wey dey sabi ginger...thanks for stopping by,gracias

Gabbyraze:
I tire o,already typed on my notepad,na to copy and paste remain o. If I paste am here,click submit,it shows an error message,nawa
Bibijay123, creeza, Leigh, veekid, I need yna help o

Here we go

Gabbyraze:
I tire o,already typed on my notepad,na to copy and paste remain o. If I paste am here,click submit,it shows an error message,nawa
Bibijay123, creeza, Leigh, veekid, I need yna help o

Present ..... Niccur

Done typing,would update soon....make I sharply arrange house

This is a great story Gabbyraze. ..

Following. ..waiting for the next update

Hope you managed to sort your browser issues.

Merry Christmas to you and your family

Lleigh:
This is a great story Gabbyraze. ..

Following. ..waiting for the next update

Hope you managed to sort your browser issues.

Merry Christmas to you and your family

Thanks ma'am, u are my inspiration. Same to u, next update coming before 12 hopefully

THE GAME
***************
On the day of the said exam,which was for 3pm, I got to the exam venue(physics lab, science village) around 2:45pm,lo and behold I saw about 10 guys from my class partaking in same exam, for my mind ehn,I was like "so all this guys now na machinery dem b o" cos they are fairly intelligent and we had very few F in our own phy102....

The students who were gonna take the exam were almost 300,so we all went in,seated and waited for the question paper and answer booklet to be shared. Mah no lie, I was prepared bookwise but I was kinda scared because if you are caught, well....the exam started around 3:45pm, and me, chizzy and my other classmates colonised two seats, as per machinery colony.. The checks for id card and school fees receipt wasn't too serious because of the crowd, at some point tho, one of the invigilators who is a yr2 physics student saw us (machineries) and raised an eyebrow,like " see this men o" but chizzy as per leader spoke with him and the guy bone, naso my mind sweet like, oboi c confirm level, little did I know it ain't always rosy.

The exam went well, I pocket my 4k afterwards and went home grinning like a kid who just discovered porn.

*********************
About two weeks later, we had our own course phy202 (Electronics), its an easy course and the lecturer was a clown who uses his lecture time to crack jokes and yab students, according to exam regulations, any department that borrows a course from another department must send at least one invigilator on the day of the exam. It so happened that for phy202, statistics and computer science departments were borrowing and after we had seated, fully prepared for the exam, the lecturer came in, saw the crowd and asked for representatives of the other departments, unfortunately there was none and the man cancelled the exam, oboi naso we begin beg o,promised him we weren't going to make the exam hall a rowdy place,we were going to coordinate ourselves,yada yada yada, even the class reps tried convincing the man but he didn't budge o,mehn I was disappointed and angry cos my head don full with calculations and formula wey i wan download give am.

Coincidentally, a yr1 exam was going on same time, in the same vicinity (science village), STA132 (statistical method), almost 35% of my classmates had this course carry over but due to the clash in schedule,they already forfeited the sta132,omo as d man cancel the phy202, they started running towards the building of the sta132, praying for luck and hoping for the best since God has smiled on them. For me, na house sure pass, had a Manchester United game I wanted to go and watch since exam don cast,then i heard my name,"ken howfar", it was chizzy accompanied by another guy, and I had a feeling like, "this ain't gonna be good"

Bibijay123, veekid, Leigh, jojosweet, creeza, ASHBEE, xaviercasmir, freesinzu......
Merry Christmas in advance o, abeg make Una tell me where I dull o, corrections will be welcomed with one bottle of origin and plate of asun

MORE PLEASE!!!!!!!

My Christmas gift to everybody who is reading this story, thank you....
Cc veekid, bibijay123, Leigh, creeza, xaviercasmir

Continued
**********
He came towards me with the guy, didn't recognise him tho, pleaded that since phy202 has been cancelled, I should help the other guy write sta132, I was like, "bros me no open that course at all", the guy spoke up and said he had faith in me and believe I could do it for him even if I didn't read the course at all. Naso plans change o, I quickly took his last 3 digits (reg number) and memorised his full names, collected my 4k (no time to waste), hit the venue of the statistics exam which was already in full force. Lo and behold, I saw Lotta classmates who didn't pass the course the first time and others who were machines like me, naso I block one babe (Cynthia) and I was like, "how far, u dey write this course as c/o", she replied in the affirmative and even mentioned she prepared for it adequately since the phy202 isn't too difficult. Oboi my belle sweet o,chai but as per sharp delta man, I quickly asked her to remind me of some major formulars in the course and she did so flawlessly.

We were finally ushered into another class since the first hall was filled and i was lucky to sit behind her (God loves me), question paper and answer booklet was shared and also attendance sheet, which I filled accordingly but with fear since the names and reg number on the attendance dosent correlate with the details on the school fees receipt and id card i had with me. Exam started and i was carefully answering the questions and waiting for the babe to fill her answer booklet b4 i began spy,all of a sudden, she stood up, went to the invigilator and submitted, I was like WHAT!!!!!, see hearbreak. Hope lost, or so i thought.....

Keep it coming bro

keep it rolling bro.

On Behalf of the READERS UNIT OF NAIRALAND (RUON) i am hereby task to give you the necessary go ahead needed.

We are in support of ur quest, hope you make us proud.

Yours Reader.

Thanks y'all for the comments,would try to update today hopefully. Before highness take over, merry Christmas people

Nice1 bruh....carryon we gat ur back

**********
Continued 2

The invigilator was surprised as well because we had spent like 30 mins in the hall and its impossible to finish all the questions in such a short time, the guy called the attention of the lecturer incharge, and when the lecturer came, she recognised the student (they have had an unfortunate meeting in our year1), the lecturer ordered the girl back to her seat with her answer sheet, since the answer sheet was empty. Naso the girl begin cry o,knelt down and was begging the lecturer because she didn't want to get another F apparently she skipped writing her name in the attendance sheet as well, i guess her brain reformat inside exam hall and she forgot all she had read (cramming things,not advisable).

She came back and sat down,sniffling and cleaning her eyes, my heart started beating hard because the lecturer might use that scene to start checking everybody's answer booklet and attendance sheet to make sure all is in place, naso i do the one wey i remember and i jejely go submit after counting the ceiling multiple times (joblessness).
Thank God it went well, i called chizzy and told him it went well and am out, naso he begin hail me for phone, "baddest ken", "i believe your ministry".........

**********
I told my cousin who also happens to be my roommate about the game and he was impressed, a few days after, his friend came to visit us and asked if I could write mat102 for another friend of theirs who didn't pass the course, my cousin was in building technology 300 level (faculty of environmental sciences), aside writing for the friend, they wanted me to pass the solutions to three other guys in same hall, that's like killing 3 birds with one stone....

I agreed but billed them 8k since na multiple people and the risk go plenty, i met with the guy i was writing for, we spoke extensively and had an agreement. The downside of this particular deal was that, building department in my school don't have much crowd compared to other departments, so the possibility of the lecturer recognising every student was high, coupled with the fact that each level in the department have a standby invigilator aside the lecturer in charge. My cousin's friend (obyno) assured me that most of the lecturers don't have wahala except few and they can easily relate with their year 3 invigilator about my presence so that i will be comfortable, naso i gree and the upside was that, they don't really do credential checks since everybody knows everybody.

On the day of the exam, we got to the venue (stat hall, science village), arranged ourselves according,my two attaches were arranged in such a way that one was behind me and the other in front of me, obyno sat adjacent to me as per moral support and back up (incase yawa gas). Exam started, things were going well, my mind was settled and a man came in midway,went to the lecturer and invigilators in front and was chatting with them, obyno called my attention and said, "guy this man wey enter so na troublesome man o, just dey on low-key till he go", in my mind, i was like, "Kai naso my mind go dey cut everytime for this business", i quietly faced my question paper and didn't raise my head till the man left.

Is u that want to do mercinary nah . Lol IF THE MAN CATCH U EH?

************
My mind was beating fast and i was scared because i have heard tales of how people who are caught impersonating are made to face a panel and most are suspended for 2 academic years, after like 25 mins, the man left and the exam went accordingly. Obyno was proud and praised my calmness (little dis he know my mind don cut tire), the other guys took my number and thanked me profusely for the ease with which i could solve the questions and pass the answers to them.

My main exams went smoothly and during that period, i started thinking of the path am taking and the risk involved, so am per say i b man of my words, i made rules which will act like an ethos for the game and they were

1. Never accept chicken pay (less than 4k)..... Am a businessman and i give guarantees.

2. Never take a job without sufficient time for adequate preparation.... He who fails to plan, plans to fail.

3. Whoever am going to write for must not be a popular person.... A popular face will be missed in class and that might put unnecessary need for scrutiny of the people in the exam hall.

4. I must get sufficient information about the course, lecturer, past questions, if they did quiz or not..... Some lecturers can be crazy and will start asking you questions especially if your face isn't a regular one.

5. I must know the course rep of the dept am writing..... Back up is very very important.

***************

Chizzy found a way of preparing fresh id cards, no matter the department because without a form of identity, a machinery is not protected. There is this shop in unizik junction where we do it (N700) for both school fees receipt and departmental id card for any department.

Fast forward, 300 level, I started coming out of my shell little by little, mingling with people in other departments, guys and girls alike, but i was careful because i needed to always keep a low profile for my game, a popular and well known face is a recipe for trouble when impersonating.

Exam time meant business time, chizzy had spread his tentacles to almost all the departments (baddest course rep), the week time table came out, he called me to come to his hostel for an important discussion..... When i got there, man looked busy making phone calls (customer service things) , he had copies of our year 1 and year 2 results and a notebook where he was scribbling records of different people (names, reg no, courses failed and missing result), then he said "ken business don show o, we gats hammer for ds level"..... I knew i was in for a more different and deeper level of the game

TBC