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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Religion / Islam for Muslims / I Need Help. (866 Views)
I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 4:53am On Dec 24, 2016 |
Asc first of all... I'm not the one that needs help, it's one of my friends. Long story short, she likes this guy, the guy likes her back,been talking for a year now, wants to get married but her parents told her they want a guy from the same race.... he's not black. I know that's haram, that in islam what matters most is the deen and how strong the iman is but they won't budge. Hell my parents tried talking to them but they won't listen. Do they have another option? |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 4:59am On Dec 24, 2016 |
Try talking to another trusted family member or someone else that her parents respect to try to convince them. Is it only because of the race or do they have other reasons to be concerned? |
Re: I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 5:05am On Dec 24, 2016 |
snapscore: I personally know the guy and he has all the good qualities. They don't know him. Her family has mentioned her marrying her own race before. She has her aunt coming this weekend to talk to her mom but it's unlikely that she'll change her mind... they're very stubborn. But I heard that if your parents refuse to let you marry someone for stupid reasons like this, that you can have your uncle approve of it? Am I wrong? |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:06am On Dec 24, 2016 |
well if there is no shareeah reason why thry are preventing her from marrying then after begging them and they still insist, the wali role should be transfered to another person in the family, the grandfather for instance. The wali does not have the right to prevent a woman from marrying on the basis of his own whims and with no shareeah reason. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 5:08am On Dec 24, 2016 |
lexiconkabir: Yah that's what I thought but her grandparents live in Africa and this girl is in the USA... |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:09am On Dec 24, 2016 |
if all her guardians prevent her for no shareeah reason, then the leader of that community(who should be a muslim) will be her wali. |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:09am On Dec 24, 2016 |
HayatH: how bout her uncles? |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:13am On Dec 24, 2016 |
HayatH: Yes you can. An uncle from the paternal side. If they haven't met him, how can they refuse him? Maybe he should pay them a visit. It not like they will chase him out of the house would they? I would also strongly encourage that istikhara should be performed. |
Re: I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 5:13am On Dec 24, 2016 |
lexiconkabir: Yah, they're both here. |
Re: I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 5:13am On Dec 24, 2016 |
snapscore: They don't even want to be see him.... as soon as they heard that he's not black, their answer was "hell no" |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:15am On Dec 24, 2016 |
HayatH: Oh really? Then I don't know. I ask Allah to soften their hearts. |
Re: I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 5:19am On Dec 24, 2016 |
snapscore: Me too. |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:22am On Dec 24, 2016 |
HayatH: then, one of them can do the job, i hope they agree tho. |
Re: I Need Help. by Nobody: 5:26am On Dec 24, 2016 |
HayatH: You know, tell your friend not to worry about it. This is probably a rough time for her but everything will workout the way it's meant to. If her parents refuse and she decides uses her uncle (from paternal side) as a guardian, then I would still strongly encourage isthikhara. Ask her if she knows about it. I would try searching for some links about it. Some of them are already here on NL. In the meantime, just tell her not to worry much. |
Re: I Need Help. by HayatH(f): 5:27am On Dec 24, 2016 |
snapscore: I will InShaaAllah, thank you for your help |
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