OluDare01:

my NL crush has spoken

uvalued:
hmm humility of both will make no one hear them

Bruh, so you want to tell me a wife who want his hubby to do the following even before marriage will be humble enough not to make the fighting public??

WHOcarex:
And many many years on, the people in the neighborhood speak while no one give a fvck.

Lol, that's true because the neighborhood will eventually get tired of the cat fight and no amount of _fucks will be given anymore...

PatriotTemidayo:
A Jobless, Flairless or Visionless woman is a burden to a man, irrespective of the love between them. To be clear, Love becomes sweeter and bonds get tighter if a woman brings something to the table, other than her face, curves and what's between her legs.

The reason most men treat their wives like grandmas after one child or two children is because those "assets" they take as their selling point would have lost their first-hand values. At such point, Na Double wahala for the owner of them body.

Wise women know these things.
They know that a man has a special place for a hardworking and supportive wife, one who refused to be a hang-on in his journey of life.
And while many slug the phrase "Real Love is or is not" out, let me throw this pragmatic bomb in the middle:
"True Love exists, only as a condition"
The man that fell in love with you saw something.....he heard something.....or felt something. If not, why didn't he woo Shade instead of Laide.

I read a Lady's new year prayer that "God should frustrate men into marriage this year", and in Olamide's Voice "that kind prayer la fin Shey tissue".
That was the first prayer rejected in heaven this year believe.
Instead of her to pray that God Help them build marriageable Characters and Self-Control from all useless, senseless and unprofitable Flexing, she's asking for a frustrated man as a husband, Shioo!

Love is a beautiful thing.
My opinion.

LegalBaby:
all your threads are always against ladies

paulavon:
@Toks2008,thanks for a great post,it is normal for certain group of people to criticize the points you listed because they challenged certain of their warp thinking and fantasies. They are quick to claim you want them to settle for less or lower their standards.

Please create threads that will challenge men and make us better.

misspicy:
Rules rules and rules everywhere.
Your first point is very flawed,if it takes been very careful to make the right decision I will do that,who wants to end up with a dangerous man or worst still a murderer or rapist?

There is no crime in marrying late.
So y'all need to chill on using that phrase as a threat.

I have nothing more to type,this rules have been over flogged especially by Toks,are there no new topics to talk about?
You keep recycling the same sh!t since 2015,I remember giving myself headache cos of your threads,now all I see in them is a joke.

I will pass on this

makydebbie:
No 5 annoys me the most. And most times, they want big wedding to spite their peers.

LegalBaby:
all your threads are always against ladies

Toks2008:
I will be as blunt as i can in addressing these ignorant notions some Nigerian ladies have towards marriage.

1.Being too careful about her choice of man:

OK I understand you are the type that is so scared of venturing into marriage so you want to be very careful in choosing that man you will likely spend your life with..but I'm sorry to be the carrier of BAD NEWS..."No matter how careful you may be,every marriage is filled with uncertainties...even if you marry an angel,he could turn to a demon so just take the risk and be ready to confront any uncertainty you find else you may remain scared and single for a very long time.
Infact the more careful you are the greater the possibility of making a mistake.

2.I want a man who will love me for real:

I'm very vast in English language but when it comes to this sentence,the more I try to understand the more confused I get..."love you for real" like seriously!

You better get this fact now,if loving you for real means loving you with your imperfections then i might agree to an extent else...NO MAN CAN LOVE YOU FOR REAL except that real is substituted for many things like love you for your curves,intelligence,manners.....so stop using this ackward sentence and try to develop something a man can desire you for...no man wants a woman for nothing.

3.Wanting a made guy or financially OK guy:

I honestly have nothing against this except the fact that being financially OK is relative and we don't ever get to know the definition of "being financially ok"

But then I kinda wonder why ladies fail to understand that most guys in their late 20s and early 30s are still trying to find their feet which means a lady who wants a made guy is inadventedly saying she wants a married man or sugar daddy because most made men in Nigeria are in their mid or late 30s and in their 40s and would have been married.

However,the few younger ones who are made can not have more than one wife.

Ladies should try to be financially independent so that they can be disciplined enough to start a life with a guy rather than struggling with several ladies to be with a "made" guy or ending up as a side chic of a made guy.

4.I can not suffer with a man because he could dump me latter:

This is one of the dumbest notion many Naija ladies have and anytime I hear a lady says this I just give her that stupid look of a looser.

Are you doing any guy a favor by dating him when he is broke? For Petes sake you have every right to walk away from any affair if you dim fit and staying with a struggling guy is your choice and not a favor. ..if he latter becomes rich and he dumps you,just walk away rather than use those words to blackmail him.

5.My wedding will be the talk of the town:

I totally agree that a grand wedding is the dream of most ladies and I also share in this dream but the question is this; "Is it a do or die to have a grand wedding"?
What is wrong in having an intro and registry wedding and latter plan for the grand one when the funds are there?

Don't be deceived. ..8 out of 10 grand weddings in Nigeria are sponsored.

I think this is one area many ladies are destroying their lives because a guy will do you like a wife and enjoy all the wify benefit while telling you he is not ready for a grand wedding and you will continue to foolishly play along until he dumps your overused ass for a younger lady when he is finally ready...biko receive sense.

6.GOD has not confirmed him or my Pastor said he is not the one:

Like seriously! OK get this straight. ..it is good to listen to the word of GOD or to follow your pastor's advice but hello! when it comes to choosing a spouse GOD has clearly made it our duty to look for a spouse and he will gladly give us his favor ...Proverbs 18:22:
"Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD".

The best you can do is to pray to God that a good guy finds you and when next a prophet or pastor tells you a certain guy is not for you...simply ask him with humility to tell you who your man is..his name,house address,complexion....

7.I can't marry a man I have no feelings for:

Your feeling is very important when choosing a man but pray he also has feelings for you else you will end up in tears no matter how deep your feelings for him is.

This is a hard nut for many ladies but the sincere fact is that your feelings is not as important as the guy's feeling towards you.

Getting married to a man may be hinged on your feelings but staying married to him is primarily dependent on how he feels towards you.


8.Marriage is a beautiful and wonderful institution:

I'm so sorry to tell you another bad news...."marriage is very turbulent and you will feel like running out"

At the intial stage it will seem like its so beautiful and made in heaven but that is the initial gragra stage. But when the reality stage sets in you will come to know the true picture of marriage but the good news is that you can make yours always beautiful if you can learn to tolerate, forgive,forgive and forgive because only two forgivers can make a beautiful marriage.

9.If my husband truly loves me,he will never cheat on me:

I know this issue is over-flogged and many ladies will never agree to this fact..."YOUR HUSBAND CAN HAVE EYES FOR ONLY YOU AND IN FACT COMMIT SUICIDE IF YOU LEAVE HIM YET CAN STILL CHEAT ON YOU"...sounds stupid I guess but that is just the truth..

Just warn your husband that if he must do let him go far far away from you and must use protection...I always say...only a foolish lady will hinge her marital happiness on her husband's sexual faithfulness to her.

I'm not supporting philandering but this is just how the cookie crumbles.

10.I want a tall cute rich romantic sexy....

Habba sister just negodu there...only you one...please there is a difference between real life and Telemundo. .you can not have all you want in one man and if you think you have then kudos to you. Many ladies cheat on their hubbies or fiance because they can't help comparing...

Tade is good in bed but not rich enough...Richard spoils me with money but very boring in bed and Seun is so caring but.... so you run to Richard to get money,you remember Tade when you feel like having a good time and Seun comes to mind if you want to feel loved..YOU ARE A SORRY CASE.

Just go for a man that has the average qualities and settle down...no man has it all.

As long as a lady is ready to face these facts then she will definitely have no problem in her marriage but if you find yourself totally uncomfortable with one or more of the points listed above, i will advice you remain single until you are mature enough to accept them.

My humble opinion

makydebbie:
Crush

Toks2008:


Chai! see wisdom...abeg if you be woman and unmarried then I must say GOD bless that man that will marry you and if you be man abeg just pick any of my sisters...I train them well.

Very insightful comments.

OluDare01:
yes na, I been dey follow you bumper to bumper

LegalBaby:
all your threads are always against ladies

makydebbie:
Lol...stalker

Toks2008:
I will be as blunt as i can in addressing these ignorant notions some Nigerian ladies have towards marriage.

1.Being too careful about her choice of man:

2.I want a man who will love me for real:

3.Wanting a made guy or financially OK guy:

4.I can not suffer with a man because he could dump me latter:

5.My wedding will be the talk of the town:

6.GOD has not confirmed him or my Pastor said he is not the one:

PatriotTemidayo:

My Brother and Friend, Plenty Thanks.
Wait a minute! are they your sisters truly?
Omo Your home is full of beautiful Damsels.
Well, am a man. Single........ However, I like to choose My poison myself.

fellis:


1. Men can also be too careful with their choice of woman: this isn't a bad thing because marriage is a lifetime commitment you can't be careless with your choice so why is it n avenue to attack women again?

2. Men can also want women to love them for real and again I fail to see how this is such a terrible thing for women to do.

3. Men these days want a financially OK woman as a wife. Even millionaire men look for rich women to marry.

4. Same applies to men. Nobody in their right senses will put in effort to please a person that will not appreciate them and dump them in future.

5. Not all women want this old man. Maybe the ones you have been toasting that kept turning you Dow and making you so hateful of women.

6. You honestly think men don't go to church or mosque to 'confirm' their intended spouses? You really need to get your head out of your arse.

7. Same applies to men. Why enter a lifetime contract with someone you feel nothing for? How is this a bad thing?!??

8. Women don't believe marriage is a beautiful institution. We know what's up. We know the rubbish women have to put up with after marriage in the name of being humble and submissive.

9. Not true. We are well aware of men's inability to remain celibate or sexually faithful. We know what time it is. We don't expect you to remain loyal because your ain't shit asses cannot pull such a feat.

10. Everyone wants a good looking spouse old man. Nothing wrong with that.

I should probably start following you so that I can see your stupid_ posts immediately you write them and cut them down before they reach front page.

catlova2:


Mayb all of them are always against u

Toks2008:


Oòoooooh GOD which kain wahala be this for Saturday morning...you abuse me I no talk then you still choose to discuss the thread but still included insults...

Abeg if you want die on top another person opinion just carry go...not my business.

fellis:


Ohhh, when you write epistles of the apostles for others to read it is not wahala but when other people write it then its wahala abi?

Better read that post and learn. You go write nonsense come insult women on top then start crying victim when people call you out on your bullshit.

fellis:

1. Men can also be too careful with their choice of woman: this isn't a bad thing because marriage is a lifetime commitment you can't be careless with your choice so why is it n avenue to attack women again?

2. Men can also want women to love them for real and again I fail to see how this is such a terrible thing for women to do.

3. Men these days want a financially OK woman as a wife. Even multi millionaire men look for rich women to marry.

4. Same applies to men. Nobody in their right senses will put in effort to please a person that will not appreciate them and dump them in future.

5. Not all women want this old man. Maybe the ones you have been toasting that kept turning you Down and making you so hateful of women.

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6. You honestly think men don't go to church or mosque to 'confirm' their intended spouses? You really need to get your head out of your arse.
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7. Same applies to men. Why enter a lifetime contract with someone you feel nothing for? How is this a bad thing?!??

8. Women don't believe marriage is a beautiful institution. We know what's up. We know the rubbish women have to put up with after marriage in the name of being humble and submissive.


9. Not true. We are well aware of men's inability to remain celibate or sexually faithful. We know what time it is. We don't expect you to remain loyal because your ain't shit asses cannot pull such a feat.

10. Everyone wants a good looking spouse old man. Nothing wrong with that.



I should probably start following you so that I can see your stupid_ posts immediately you write them and cut them down before they reach front page.

sarahade:
This toks guy can rant nonsense. And you are trying to justify yourself because you are not man a enough.

I want a real man who will not cheat on me.
My happiness is solely based on it if i can't have that i will pack my bag and leave he can have another woman of low self worth.

If a man can't be faithful then what is his function ? P*SSY masagger i can get that from anyone.

A man is the leader in any relationship, so his wife is watching and learning from him. If he can't stay faithful then she should expect the same from his wife.

What do men take women for? You think we don't get tired of the boring sex and sleeping with the same man?
You will be surprised.

Toks2008:


Lol! of course they are...

Yes o..just choose the one we please you and face the consequence of your decision.

PatriotTemidayo:
Can I point? Cuz am beginning to see vision o Lets follow each other.

Toks2008:


Na point and kill?

PatriotTemidayo:

I didn't include "Kill" Na
But now that you have said it , can I??