We've been living together for 5 years now. Recently, my allergies have been severe that I had to see a doctor. I'm allergic to cats, dust mites and pollens. One Sunday morning while he had to work, I re-arranged our apartment and put down some wall decorations including his sports frames and other picture frames. I moved things and trying to minimized our clutters at home. One- because I wanted a more relaxing apartment, less decor and more space to move around. Second- I wanted to minimize our decorations and furniture so it won't attaract dust etc, which I'm allergic to.

He came home that afternoon and he didn't like what I was doing. We got into an argument and I left our apartment for few hours. He didn't bother calling me or even care where the heck I was. I came back home and he asked me to put back the things to it's original place. My boyfriend loves to do interior decorating, he gets a lot of recognition from family and friends from his ideas. But I don't like that there are too many small figurines, frames and wall frames, too heavy too look at and our place is small.

I returned all to it's original place. Today, I saw a nice mirror on our way home. A neighbor is throwing it away because it has cracks on each side. But I figured it can be fixed by a heavy glue. I brought it home and again, he did not like it. We got into another argument. I ended up throwing the mirror. All furnitures, decors, appliances in our apartment are mostly his. I am not fond of decorating so I don't buy, but lately, because of my allergies. I felt like we need to minimize things in our place.

What should I do? I have no say in this place though I live in here too. How to handle this type of situation? and yeah, we've been living for 5 yrs but he doesn't have plans to get married yet

You feel like reducing things and yet you brought a mirror into the house, and a mirror that someone was gonna throw away for that matter?

Why do you live with your BF?

Lack of communication seems to be your major problem. Maybe you should talk some more. Don't just do things alone, do it as a couple. Let him know you want to do it, ask of his opinion, discuss it, it's good to talk!

love6238:

Today, I saw a nice mirror on our way home. A neighbor is throwing it away because it has cracks on each side. But I figured it can be fixed by a heavy glue. I brought it home and again, he did not like it. We got into another argument.

Just listen to yourself!

u guys shd not be living 2gether in d first place,thats a recipe for disaster.And 5yrs?

Ujujoan:

Why do you live with your BF? 

She's trying to be an American.

mama-gee:

She's trying to be an American.

Lol

@ poster

it's been 5 years living together and you both have not developed a balance in your shared space situation. i think you both need to sit and talk about the arguements and what really is causing it because it sounds to me like there is some passive aggressiveness going on. Figure out what is really going on and talk about how much it's your home too. Also never just move things around in your shared home because you want to because you are living with someone and the rules of playing house it that you must talk out decisions that would affect the two of you before you make a move.

Communicate= answer

omega25red:

@ poster

it's been 5 years living together and you both have not developed a balance in your shared space situation. i think you both need to sit and talk about the arguements and what really is causing it because it sounds to me like there is some passive aggressiveness going on. Figure out what is really going on and talk about how much it's your home too. Also never just move things around in your shared home because you want to because you are living with someone and the rules of playing house it that you must talk out decisions that would affect the two of you before you make a move.

Communicate= answer

They need to go separate ways.
5 year and no understanding of one another?
The guy seems to be tired of the relationship and the babe dont seems to be getting the message, cos for him not to give a hoot where she went, it is a clear message.

Fhemmmy:

They need to go separate ways.
5 year and no understanding of one another?
The guy seems to be tired of the relationship and the babe dont seems to be getting the message, cos for him not to give a hoot where she went, it is a clear message.

u have a point there

5years this is one of the disadvanteage of co-habitation
you two need to work things out now or go your seperate ways

all i can say iw WHOA! you been living together for five years and he has no plans to marry you?well he got what he needed who pay for extra right?shine your eyes young lady,he will never marry you and he's totally wasting your time and worse of all he's controlling and doesn't want you to do anything in the house even though you like there too. sheeee, you're in trouble my sister

Please get out of there. Why move in in the first place, wrong move,

@ Poster

Damn it, u are in deep shit. he will get rid of u very soon. its just too obvious.

he does not have to spell it out to u before u know that he is tired of u and does not want u to contribute anything into the apartment and does not want u to feel as if u belong in there. so girl, if u know what is good for u, u had better get an apartment to urself before he surprises u by throwing u out of his apartment when he feels he has had enough.

^^^ Lol
U mean to tell her that the handwriting is all on the wall, and she just refused to see it