Today, I went to that church again. It’s been years since I have been there and so much has changed, I just feel like you should know too.
It was close to your house, your mother’s house, it still is and we used to come there from the other side of town every time we had service. Then, my father would drop us with his ash BMW and pick us up after service. But I particularly remember one service he did not have to drop or pick us for us to go, all three of us; my sister, my brother and me(The Three Musketeers). We did not miss a day of the 21 days of Power Must Change Hand. We were early every morning, from the other side of town and we would hang around with you guys in your mother’s compound until the service would start. Do you remember that?
I remember looking forward to church, because you guys were going to come too; all four of you; your two sisters, you and your younger brother.
I used to have a crush on your younger brother and you had a crush on my elder sister. She was the quiet one, you know. The one that stared and smiled but never said much, the one that wore the long skirt and long sleeves with scarves that could never totally cover her curly hair. I don’t know if you ever noticed that but we all had curly hair. I remember standing beside her and giggling myself silly because you were both at opposite ends of the church hall yet stole peeks at each other and smiled. I was the observer and I had watched with stupid, childish relish as both of you ogled at each other all day but yet too shy to say hi. I was not shy at all, I was already friends with your sister. We exchanged jotting notes and she had a nice writing.
You were fine and all the girls said it but my sister would sit among them and say nothing about you until one day, I saw the two of you, away from the rest of us talking and laughing like you were best friends. The day you invited her over, she was so shy that when your sister asked her if she would mind a cup of tea, she stuttered, “ No. I ate before coming.”
She was so happy and I remember feeling jealous. The other girls were unbelievably envious.
And you sent her a card on Valentine’s Day, the one with red blinking lights that sang and you wrote on the top left corner, “Jesus Loves You.” I laughed at you that day, how cowardly that was but you will never know I ever thought of you that way. But you learnt to get bolder and daring. She was in the church choir so you sent her a message on her tiny Motorola, “I call you my diva, my priceless treasure, a jewel of immeasurable worth….” Do you remember that?
Because of you, she bought a text message pamphlet, the one with Genevive and Ini Edo in front and we would compose messages to you like, “if hugs were water, I would send you the ocean and sail away with you forever…” she swore she would marry you, she even carved it on the wall, October 5th, 2005.
I went away to school but you kept in touch, many, many, many years after, you both still spoke.
Those days were so innocent, so blissful. I was a child and I was not in a hurry to grow up. You used to tease her that her best song was, “Al donna, we worship you….” I admired the both of you, you were both so fine, I was already envious of your children in the future. You were just a year older than she was but you finished early and left for school. She missed you, I don’t know if she ever told you that.
But we grew up, you, her, me, your brother , my brother and your sisters. Yours both was the only story that was worth telling. We made so little fuss about my crush on your brother so I gave up on him. We all left; your sisters and brother too, my sister and brother too. Now, there is nobody left anymore.
So, today, I went to that church again and there was not a face I could remember anymore. Those little babies that used to run around with running nose are the ones now singing in the choir, their mothers are looking unrecognizably old and their fathers have beer bellies now. In those days, the roof was not completed but now, the ceiling is white and instead of wooden benches, there are plastic seats and the children seat at the back.
I know what is now but I will always remember what used to be; how we were children and nothing else, when we did not over think issues because we were afraid. I remember because things are not what they used to be and I don’t know if they will ever be again.
I remember, and I won’t ever forget.

O.Kitanaa @’17