i keep praying that i find the perfect man for me but whenever a man says he likes me and asks me to be his girlfriend i start losing interest pretty fast.If am asked out i give excuses.am i scared or what is wrong with me.I dont understand why i keep praying to have a boyfriend and yet when i find one i get disillusioned.What on earth is wrong with me?

Maybe you are scared of being hurt, especially with the stories we hear everyday. I think you should let your guard down a little and see what happens.

guess we are jst d same see wat u need do is to be calm patient dnt anticipate wats a guy will do 4 me u are already judging b4 it happens dat no way

Some more help b4 the new year abeg

Not every man can settle down and commit to a woman. Some mates I know walked out of their relationships because as they told me, they did not want such responsibilities. I got this mate who has been with his woman for about 11 years now but will not commit to her. She is about 12 years older than him, divorced and her kids are all grown up and left home. He does not see himself marrying or having kids. On reflection, I concluded that there are some men out there who genuinely cannot commit to a woman and who actually have commitment issues. I guess the same may apply to some women out there too and I suppose there is a variety of reasons for this behaviour.

there is nothing wrong with you
Could be the way you were raised as in maybe deep down you fear that your family would disapprove of you having a boyfriend and not someone who is looking to marry you. Or maybe you have been hurt many times and you are now gun shy. what ever the reason is you alone can answer that question

Its simple; maybe u were cut-out to be a dyke or,

mimon79:

Its simple; maybe u were cut-out to be a dyke or,

wow lol

more views please

Me dont fink nuthin's wrong wif u. where u grew up or previous experiences or of those close to you made u like this.

being xtra careful bout relationship/guys is a good thing so long as its not in d extreme.

so tell aus. have u had any bad break-up?

not very bad ones,coz i am the one who ends my relationships if i sense its not taking the right direction.am so afraid of being dumped.It can hurt me real bad

mindeh:

not very bad ones,coz i am the one who ends my relationships if i sense its not taking the right direction.am so afraid of being dumped.It can hurt me real bad

Dats ur problem rite there. U are projecting/imagining hurt even b4 it shows up. U are preparing urself for flight and so u take measures to run even b4 u saw anytin.

U need to stop doing this. We are humans hurting is part of our world, u can't let dat stop u from enjoying all dat life has to give. Relationship is meant to be enjoyed. Imagining horrors b4 any happens will only put a damper on ur emotions and convert dem into unhealthy fear stopping u in ur tracks.

Let go of this and u will see urself moving on in ur relationships.

I know it may not be easy to stop behaving this way but u have to give it ur best shot or else u will end up frustrated and lonely.

The relationship between one's parents could have an influenceon a person's relationship.

i agree that the environment in which you were raised, particularly your parents' relationship, could be subconsciously causing you to shy away from serious relationships. it's a psychological thing really, you need to find out what exactly your fears are, what's holding you back.

anything worthwhile comes with some amount of risk, so you need to be willing to take the risk of getting hurt. just remember that if one relationship doesn't work out that's not the end. you have to learn to step out of your comfort zone; if you give an excuse to avoid going on a date you call/text the guy and reschedule. since you made the move it would be difficult to back out.

one thing that might help is trying to build up friendships with guys so you would learn to trust them, before getting into a serious relationship.