The other day I was talking to a guy and he said, “girls don’t need to call guys, the guy will do the calling’. This was supposedly his opinion as regards the duty of calling in a relationship. It got me a bit annoyed as I thought “is there a law that makes it a guy’s duty to call a girl?” The chauvinistic view of people (even of both genders) is quite annoying. I told him plainly ‘the work of calling is for anyone’. Some guys believe that girls are out to spend their (the guy`s) money. I do not even blame them as people of gender have contributed to the demoralization the gender faces by not being independent and making it a guy`s duty to spend on them.
Sometimes, I like to argue like a feminist, but I may or may not necessarily be one. I am a girl who admires the idea of equity (which in law is equality) and thus would love to see it in the gender role, responsibility and gender based occurrence s. It annoys me most times when people say stuffs like, “so you can’t cook and you will soon get married o. What will you give your husband?”. This question annoys me simply because the reason people think I should be able to cook is for my future husband. It would have been better if they had said something like ,”so you can’t cook? How do you eat, how do you survive?”
The world is fast becoming an enlightened one both in ideology and behaviour; it would not be a bad idea if my husband can cook and his cooking skills aid our eating experience in the course of the marriage.
And even as regards marriage, the phrases “husband material, wife material “are terms that also annoy me. You cannot tell me that what would make me suitable for a marriage is that fact that I can cook, wash clothes and tend babies well. That’s so ridiculous! How do you then term widowed husbands or single fathers that have to take care of their children singlehandedly? You definitely don’t call them wife materials but they have and exhibit the attributes that we have termed as that of a wife material.
Likewise, you do not tell a guy he is husband material simply because he is a breadwinner, has a car and a great job and can discipline children. Ladies fit into these roles these days.
Some people condemn feminism on the grounds that ladies want to play the role of guys. But it is not so. We are aware that biologically, we are not equal in the sense that the biological abilities and features we have are not the same. Nevertheless, feminism preaches that the societal roles that govern us should not be rigid. Every gender should be treated with the sma e amount of dignity and esteem.
Tradition may have made the ultimate head irrespective of his age. However, we can balance this by treating every woman irrespective of her age with respect. As a man can eat the gizzard and head of a chicken, so should a woman. If a woman is to learn to do chores and cook, teach a man to do the same. If a man can foot the bills of a date, it is not an avenue to demean his ego and pride or manliness, when a woman pays for them. If a man can earn the highest pay, a woman should be able too.
All in all, just as my beliefs are in synchronization with the ideas of feminism, I believe that there can be equity in gender- and a maxim of equity says that ‘equity is equality’ and vice versa. Therefore, gender equality is very achievable. Let the society stop chunking male dominance down our throats- the throats of women, and allow the prevalence of a gender equal society.
Read the other side of the coin on http://terrabuz.com/the-coin-of-feminism/.