josju:
Good day all, I really want your sincere views or experience on the issue of dating a lady in her early 20's. I met a girl aged 20 has finished OND and just going for internship two months back and she seems to be the right person for me, her maturity, concerns and love shown have been commendable. Am 28 and would love to have her as a wife but my fear is if she wouldn't change from this good,homely responsible girl as she grows older.
I on my part will never cheat on her as I strongly uphold the one boy one girl relationship.
Question now is has anyone experienced or seen people that dated a girl of that age and age difference that work out well?
To mature older ladies how many of you are still with the lover you met at your early 20's?
From age 20 can a lady really be sure of what she wants in a lover and stick with a loving, faithful and caring partner without the urge to explore at some point in time?
Your mature and sincere response would be appreciated.

.



You better read books and invest in your mind the reasons for marriage
Then go and propose if you want her to be your wife and mother of your children.

Let tomorrow take care of itself.
Even Jesus in the Lords prayer said" give us this day our daily bread"

Water101:
in addition to what i said it my husband who deflowered me,though i cant say much 4 some one dat has been to bed wit mutiple partners,they might keep to dat habit of exploring.Some dat are materialistic cannot be trusted either...they might just go off with a wealthy man this type if d fear of god is lacking can double date.

wowww....that's great
I tried severally wit older ladies but
the more frustrated I get ..I still don't understand a lady you just meet...and trying to express your feelings towards... will be telling you of her desire to get married....these same year.
so sorry to say...this...a lot of older ladies are so desperate to get married..many turned me down reason because I told them ...I will be getting married 2 years time...
it is sickening

My broda don't think her up as a wife yet o. Wait till d pressures of sex and yahoo boys start falling heavily on her den u will knw if she's truly loyal or not. I will always go for 24 and above.

emmaadigun:
presently, in the same dilemma, I'm actually 30 n she's in her early 20s also. since she gained admission, all about her change towards me, her keeps assuring me that all will be well. at 30, a graduate, still managing though, with a job at hand. my concern is this tread concerns, do I va hope of getting married to her.

sorry Bro.... school life is getting to her... most babes I know do that....cheers

Op come make I burst your head.

Am much sure you know Tiwa savage, Funke Akindele, Tonto dikeh and likes of others. They all married at a well matured age but what happen?

Omotola Ekeinde got married at the age of 18 and the marriage is still moving on fine.

Age is nothing when comes to relationship/marriage. What matters most is trust and understanding.

My dad married my mum@the age of 17.
Now the marriage has clocked 40yrs.

Just make sure you take your time to study her very well. Cause she's much better than dos tokubo out there.
Wey dia pus§y don over expand with numerous of abortion.

Humility017:

wowww....that's great
I tried severally wit older ladies but
the more frustrated I get ..I still don't understand a lady you just meet...and trying to express your feelings towards... will be telling you of her desire to get married....these same year.
so sorry to say...this...a lot of older ladies are so desperate to get married..many turned me down reason because I told them ...I will be getting married 2 years time...
it is sickening

if u are a christian i advice that u pray for a wife..a virtuous one,read proverb 19:14,may God help u mk rite choice.

[quote author=pocohantas post=58047510]People change because they want to change and some don't have the right guidance. Not just because they are getting older.

The thing you should have in mind is, contrary to what you read on NL, not every young girl in her early twenties is very enthusiastic about getting married at that age. Lots of them acshuali want to explore and experience life...this isn't always sexual. So, what you should do is carefully observe her and find out her type of girl.

Use your senses in the relationship. Don't overdo...
Don't go footing all her expenses in the name of love.

Most importantly, long relationships is totally unnecessary most times. That's what leads to lots of issues. Most ladies left their first love because they were most times of the same age and marriage didn't seem to be in the picture. If you observe her and she is perfect, marry her as soon as it's convenient for you both. No need fukceen each other for 6years and counting in the name of relationship.

Ignore people that will tell you to leave her alone, they are the same people that will tell you not to go for an older one because she will most likely have high bodycount. One would wonder what they want[/quote



this your name get as e be

pocohantas:
People change because they want to change and some don't have the right guidance. Not just because they are getting older.

The thing you should have in mind is, contrary to what you read on NL, not every young girl in her early twenties is very enthusiastic about getting married at that age. Lots of them acshuali want to explore and experience life...this isn't always sexual. So, what you should do is carefully observe her and find out her type of girl.

Use your senses in the relationship. Don't overdo...
Don't go footing all her expenses in the name of love.

Most importantly, long relationships is totally unnecessary most times. That's what leads to lots of issues. Most ladies left their first love because they were most times of the same age and marriage didn't seem to be in the picture. If you observe her and she is perfect, marry her as soon as it's convenient for you both. No need fukceen each other for 6years and counting in the name of relationship.

Ignore people that will tell you to leave her alone, they are the same people that will tell you not to go for an older one because she will most likely have high bodycount. One would wonder what they want

you make sense die....love your comment. keep it up.

NLProblemChild:
Picture of you and the girl or i don't belifffffffffff

Are u serious?

ikp120:
That's if she doesn't have at least 3 boyfriends already.

Bro leave that girl alone. I sense you're a very serious human being. 11 out of 12 of them are not ready for real life.

Only date her if she loves you like crazy.

This is it

Water101:
if u are a christian i advice that u pray for a wife..a virtuous one,read proverb 19:14,may God help u mk rite choice.

amen...thanks
I am a Christian... I will do what u just said
thank you

Benekruku:
Send me her contact details!

Let me help u interrogate her to know if she will change!

Will do for you free of charge!

My little way of helping

Baddoo!

kilokeys:


Bro.. I am 29. Dating 21.. Older isn't necessarily better.
The older chic I dated wanted us secret. Meanwhile I speak freely with the family of the 21 year old.

The question here is.. Why is she dating you and not someone in her age bracket.?

Keep being that thing she wants.. And she'll stay.

Mine has a million reasons.. And that's good enough for me.

My brother forget that talk.You better marry her now before you come back to this platform to tell stories that touch the heart.Girls of that age always wants to explore,its natural.

Secretario:
Dating a girl who is not experienced may prove risky.

At that age, she is yet to explore and one day she may tell you she is feeling caged in the relationship.

Let her know your intentions but don't let it override your senses.

She is just getting exposure and that will be your undoing, so do not rush her.

With due respect to all ladies, At that age, they have the "hotcake mentality" even the ugliest ones, so I will advise you seek another outlet for your joy or find an older lady.

Sometimes, if they have not gotten heartbroken, they will not know that all that glitters is not gold.

If you are the first boyfriend, just know that the relationship will not last.
If you force her, you will regret it much later.

She may be an exception, but are you ready to find out.
Bumpy ride ahead!

Here is a quote
"Birds fly definitely, but someday it will perch,
any perch then becomes gold to a weary bird!"

How to survive the Buhari recession in Nigeria (6 Tips that gets you more money)

Disclaimer: this is my opinion
Lalasticlala, Mynd44

That quote of yours is amazing. Nice piece of advice too

alexialin:
If u are ready for marriage ? And ready to scoop the bills surrounding wedding ceremonies and all, although her parents too will also assist likewise yours ?
Then go ahead and marry her

Its better to court for a short period of time and get married , than court for so many years and stil expect her to be the same .. Kolewerk like that.

At that age ? If she truly loves u? She will abide to everything u say
And if u marry her ? U can groom her to yur taste with care ,love and attention.

When I was 20years ? I wanted to get married and I was almost done from Uni. I had this impression of bn full housewife
Lol
But as destiny would have its upper hand . I got mixed up with a guy ,whose parents felt I was a gold digger , the guy sef no help matter . and he was like 34 then, and I was 21. Mehn those people frustrate my life sha!

I had to call it quits by running before two months to wedding day.

U can me everytime am a gold digger and u still bent on marrying me. Won't u call the guy a sadist? So i had to free myself and run away. Then focus squarely on making it .! So u can see the difference .

So op be kind ,protect her and love her sincerely , then marry her on time .
She will always be that ideal homely wife

Best of luck !

Very true, I have a friend who married a girl just out of Secondary school then, we make jest of him and his wife that very soon he will get tired but for the past 10 years now they are perfect lovebirds.
Our own wives are our mates with no respect for us but his own was very respectful and sincere. Infact we always envy him. They are like friends or brother sister sort of married life. Her understanding surpasses our wayward ones, who always are worldly wise.
While our own are very jealous and nagging. She never exhibit any and seem matured than our wives which are older and sophisticated. I told my friend one day that he is the luckiest among us and he said we have different choices - that no woman can control him and rather he would like to be in control else there will ruckus in the family.

Please, OP let her trust you and love you and I promise you will have the best life partner you can ever have.

Our great grandfathers marry younger girls, as wife and they are dutiful, honest and trustworthy. They serve their family diligently.

First of all, what do most of you even mean by "explore"? I"m in my early 20's(22 to be precise) and the only "exploration" i would like to engage in is travelling, furthering my education, getting a good job and attaining a level of success/comfort hopefully before i get married. The truth is that a lot of young people now are actually much smarter and mature for their age. Yes, there are some who are still childish and immature, but obviously the OP's girlfriend isnt in that category as he speaks highly of her, the only problem/fear he has is if she'll change her attitude as she gets older. Personally i"lld say if you think she's worth the risk, then continue with her and be upfront with her about your plans for the both of you so she"ll know where she stands with you on time. If she still goes ahead to change her attitude later on, then sorry in advance, but if she doesn't, please marry her. Good girls are rare this days. Bottom line is, maturity isnt by age. There's an igbo proverb that says "someone's height doesn't determine how mature he/she is". Same goes for the age as well, there are a lot of ladies in their late 20's and early 30's who are still immature and childish and don't even know want they want in life. And in the same vein there are a lot of ladies in their early 20's who already know what they want in life and are mature to a T! Just be with her, pray about it(the relationship and impending marriage) and leave the rest to God. C"est fíniś. Ayaf talk my own finish biko. Lemme go and watch my POWER.� #AngelaValdezIssaWomanScorned#�� .Who else is feeling this their soundtrack; Monster? Happy Sunday Guys.

josju:
Good day all, I really want your sincere views or experience on the issue of dating a lady in her early 20's. I met a girl aged 20 has finished OND and just going for internship two months back and she seems to be the right person for me, her maturity, concerns and love shown have been commendable. Am 28 and would love to have her as a wife but my fear is if she wouldn't change from this good,homely responsible girl as she grows older.
I on my part will never cheat on her as I strongly uphold the one boy one girl relationship.
Question now is has anyone experienced or seen people that dated a girl of that age and age difference that work out well?
To mature older ladies how many of you are still with the lover you met at your early 20's?
From age 20 can a lady really be sure of what she wants in a lover and stick with a loving, faithful and caring partner without the urge to explore at some point in time?
Your mature and sincere response would be appreciated.

IAMNOTALONE after all
To be successful in it.
You must be a father, brother, friend and a role model to her. You must give her and maintain the impression that you have class(not cash) more than the people she possibly comes in contact with, but must be financially reliable to an extent. Don't rush to her skirt especially if she is still a virgin because she might still be guarding it with pride and at all cost, thus bringing in sex at this time might spoil the show(depending on the personality)
Above all, who loves more? If she loves more, maintain it. If you love more then be vigilant and don't take put in anything you cant forfeit cos She is liable to adventure.
But don't be afraid, mine is moving successfully, your will be successful too.

whyman:


Very true, I have a friend who married a girl just out of Secondary school then, we make jest of him and his wife that very soon he will get tired but for the past 10 years now they are perfect lovebirds.
Our own wives are our mates with no respect for us but his own was very respectful and sincere. Infact we always envy him. They are like friends or brother sister sort of married life. Her understanding surpasses our wayward ones, who always are worldly wise.
While our own are very jealous and nagging. She never exhibit any and seem matured than our wives which are older and sophisticated. I told my friend one day that he is the luckiest among us and he said we have different choices - that no woman can control him and rather he would like to be in control else there will ruckus in the family.

Please, OP let her trust you and love you and I promise you will have the best life partner you can ever have.

Our great grandfathers marry younger girls, as wife and they are dutiful, honest and trustworthy. They serve their family diligently.

True but secondary school is too small o

He's lucky and he's a good man.

When man treats a good woman well, even if she's younger or older . he will receive the best out of her .
Especially during courtship which then progress into marriage . Am telling u that man will not regret his choice .
One cannot expect an abusive and mean man to have a good wife ? Even if he was lucky to marry a good wife ? One day? She will either leave the house for him or become mean towrads him.

Men who married older women should try and be loving, caring and good towards their wives , especially if shes a GOOD WOMAN ? they wil be shocked at the outcome after some weeks .

I can't believe the trash I'm reading here. Age has little or nothing to do with maturity.

I met my husband at 17. We got married when I was 18.
He is 20+ years my senior.

We've been married for 13years now and I've never thought of cheating or "exploring" with another man. God forbid!

Why??
1. He treats me well: one of the first thing that made me fall for my hus was how he treats me like a queen. He loves me with every bone in his body.
2. I'm a God fearing Christian wife and mother.

With a combination of the two qualities above any woman despite age will be a good wife.

degelinglacis:


That's how you people will not let us see husband with your yeye analysis . Your age does not determine if you will be responsible. I'm in my early twenties, I was never involved in previous marital sex and I have only dated a guy. I have never double date.

Please op, if she's responsible go for her

����

degelinglacis:


That's how you people will not let us see husband with your yeye analysis . Your age does not determine if you will be responsible. I'm in my early twenties, I was never involved in previous marital sex and I have only dated a guy. I have never double date.

Please op, if she's responsible go for her

you need to groom her the way you want her to be
she still young not too late to try

All the "men" telling the Op that ladies of that age are still exploring and are not ready to settle need to explore new environments. I have friends who got married at 21 and they are fine. Op just make sure marriage is what she wants. it also depends on her belief system. Was she born into a family that expects early marriage or the family that wants her to PhD before settling down.
Look before you leap. I have met girls that age that are very mature and not interested in "exploring" the way everyone is saying.

mayormick:
Hmm...seriously like someone said, they will still want to explore life and dat is when u will be having issues with them. Unfortunately base on their level of experience, trust me u will always be miles ahead of them in d relationship. The funniest thing is if they do anything dat look too childish and u correct them, they will see u as someone dat has too much policy. In short, they are just too raw, 'they are like crude oil, u just have to refine them somehow. However, the most painful aspect of it is after spending about 2-3 yrs training them(refining them), they will follow another person comot giving one rubbish excuse or the other. Walai, trust me av been there b4 and not sure I can date a gal in her early twenties for a serious relationship. No be profitable business jare

Bro, you deserve a very cold drink for dat piece
I've been dere too. She was 21, we dated for 3yrs and she started giving strange excuses like why was her other number stored with are name [on my phone], etc. As you've rightly said it's such and unprofitable venture

Svelte98:
First of all, what do most of you even mean by "explore"? I"m in my early 20's(22 to be precise) and the only "exploration" i would like to engage in is travelling, furthering my education, getting a good job and attaining a level of success/comfort hopefully before i get married. The truth is that a lot of young people now are actually much smarter and mature for their age. Yes, there are some who are still childish and immature, but obviously the OP's girlfriend isnt in that category as he speaks highly of her, the only problem/fear he has is if she'll change her attitude as she gets older. Personally i"lld say if you think she's worth the risk, then continue with her and be upfront with her about your plans for the both of you so she"ll know where she stands with you on time. If she still goes ahead to change her attitude later on, then sorry in advance, but if she doesn't, please marry her. Good girls are rare this days. Bottom line is, maturity isnt by age. There's an igbo proverb that says "someone's height doesn't determine how mature he/she is". Same goes for the age as well, there are a lot of ladies in their late 20's and early 30's who are still immature and childish and don't even know want they want in life. And in the same vein there are a lot of ladies in their early 20's who already know what they want in life and are mature to a T! Just be with her, pray about it(the relationship and impending marriage) and leave the rest to God. C"est fíniś. Ayaf talk my own finish biko. Lemme go and watch my POWER.� #AngelaValdezIssaWomanScorned#�� .Who else is feeling this their soundtrack; Monster? Happy Sunday Guys.

What season of POWER are you watching?

alexistaiwo:
My girlfriend is 20 years old.
Been with her since she was 17 and I can tell that though people can change but that doesn't mean if you assess her with an open mind (no love sentiment).
You will be able to at least forecast ahead the worst she is capable of becoming in the future. If you think you can cope with the result. Go for it.
Regardless whether you are getting married to a girl of 20,30,40years. Marriage is all about hoping for the best and expecting the worse.

Typed this in a hurry.
Hope I made sense?

I always look forward to your comments. Trust me when i say she is lucky to have a matured guy like you

curiositymaster:


Bro, you deserve a very cold drink for dat piece
I've been dere too. She was 21, we dated for 3yrs and she started giving strange excuses like why was her other number stored with are name [on my phone], etc. As you've rightly said it's such and unprofitable venture

Hmm..na so bro, very unprofitable. Imagine, after dating someone for 3yrs of which ur emotions must av been played with. Seriously, I can't do it again o!

They are mostly immature. Met one recently; said I was acting and talking like a 40 year old Me wey still de for 20s. And this one is a final year university student. I loved her happy and care free spirit. But then, her psyche and mine were too far apart. I just jejely leave am. I cannot come and kill myself.

missfadesola:
All the "men" telling the Op that ladies of that age are still exploring and are not ready to settle need to explore new environments. I have friends who got married at 21 and they are fine. Op just make sure marriage is what she wants. it also depends on her belief system. Was she born into a family that expects early marriage or the family that wants her to PhD before settling down.
Look before you leap. I have met girls that age that are very mature and not interested in "exploring" the way everyone is saying.

Which environment are you from? I know Northern Muslim girls are different. But apart from them, most ladies in that age will run away once you want to get very serious with them.

The guys are actually right. It's experience talking.

lefulefu:
just carry on with her but understand she might change.she"s still quite young.

of course she will change ,she has not seen enough of life . .

Secretario:
Dating a girl who is not experienced may prove risky.

At that age, she is yet to explore and one day she may tell you she is feeling caged in the relationship.

Let her know your intentions but don't let it override your senses.

She is just getting exposure and that will be your undoing, so do not rush her.

With due respect to all ladies, At that age, they have the "hotcake mentality" even the ugliest ones, so I will advise you seek another outlet for your joy or find an older lady.

Sometimes, if they have not gotten heartbroken, they will not know that all that glitters is not gold.

If you are the first boyfriend, just know that the relationship will not last.
If you force her, you will regret it much later.

She may be an exception, but are you ready to find out.
Bumpy ride ahead!

Here is a quote
"Birds fly definitely, but someday it will perch,
any perch then becomes gold to a weary bird!"

How to survive the Buhari recession in Nigeria (6 Tips that gets you more money)

Disclaimer: this is my opinion
Lalasticlala, Mynd44

One day she cud feel caged, but that doesn't apply to every young lady. Some do not even want that kind of an exploration especially if they've met someone they love truly. Its a 50 - 50 thing. Girls even at a tender age already know what they'll like to do as young ladies, so she may or may not want to explore. Btw, the age difference ain't bad at all, in fact its perfect. Some people get married to their first guy without stress, but it takes the smart guys to know who will or won't stay till the end.

TheLastIdiot:
Many Naija babes below 25 years never still get fully developed brain. Na wen babe reach 25 she go knw say life no be Aladin and the princess story!

You spoke my mind...!