LOVE ME AGAIN

Written by: Loudest Thoughts

“Time is Everything in Marriage”
EPISODE 1

Gosh its 6: 00 Am already, I stretched my arms towards my alarm and managed to say; D--n it Babs why didn’t you wake me up, I asked my sleepy wife struggling to get out of her sleep. I ignored her and quickly rushed to the washroom, within some few minutes I was out of there and on my way out with my briefcase and my car keys.

Darling am sorry but breakfast would be ready in 5minutes, I ignored her once more and off I drove away. I felt guilty treating her as such this morning but am beginning to think she’s getting too lazy lately, at least that was the only way I could defend my actions towards her lately.

FAST BACKWARS TO 3YEARS AGO
“Feelings of the first day is like buying a new something you can’t do without”


My wife Barbara and I got married two years ago in a small congregation in San Francisco where I met her during one of my business trips. With all the nice stories about how couples meet, ours was different.

A very awkward one for that matter. After business one evening, I decided to go out for a walk, along the way, I felt the urge to urinate, as I entered I met this African lady in the males washroom who didn’t even notice I entered, her door was left ajar, I quickly took out my phone and on the shutter sound of the camera, she came out of her absent mindness forgetting she was yet to pull up her “pant”.

There the fuss begun, she threatened to kill me if I do not delete the picture, I also threatened to put it on social media.

She got furious and we started exchanging words in the washroom. I couldn’t tell why I was pissed but then I convinced myself probably because she was at the wrong place which of course didn’t make sense as to why I should make a big deal of it. For some couple of minutes, someone else entered and we pretended we were fine.

Until I heard the guy say; gosh get a room. Barbara stared at me and for a second I saw something else in her eyes. She walked out and I followed forgetting what I came to do. I said please wait, she kept walking and I kept closing the distance, until she got to what seemed like her car, about to open and I shouted don’t you want your picture anymore.

Then I thought I caught her attention but she looked back and said keep it for all I care. She got into her car and tried driving off which I nearly got hit because I was standing in her drive way.

I could see her fuming in the car and finally got out, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT, and I replied I think I like you, at least let me apologize for what happened back there. Okay fine, can you get out of my way now she said. I got out of her way instantly having mixed feelings.

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Love Me Again © 2017 By: Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 2

“when you feel its’ right go get it”

A week after, I met Barbara on my hotel corridor. I actually went to see a business partner at that particular hotel, I instantly forgot what I came to do even though it will cause me the main reason of my trip I quickly rushed to her because since our encounter I have been longing to see her again, I don’t know why but that day I had goose bumps all over me.


"That does not really explain my eagerness to see her again, but I know I like her."

This time around she was not so tensed but smiled to my greetings. Hey you again, yes me again I said and reached out for a handshake, we talked and she told me she was on her way out and gave me her room number.


After she left, I told myself that was easy. In the evening I went to the reception to put a call through to her, she gave the go ahead to see her. I knocked on her door and she came out, OH you are the Clyde guy. I nodded my head simply because I was dumbfounded of the beauty staring me in the eyes. I was jolted out of my reverie when she said come in.


I was nervous but then the night went well, until I realized I was extending my stay in San Francisco because of Barbara. We became best friends and later got to know when we met in the urinal she was angry with her dad who was bent on marrying her off to another family friend.


She sounded like her Dad was so fearful, well families that have money to book a hotel for a whole year must be so rich and powerful, "I thought Barbara is a beauty to behold", it took me some time to win her heart, close to a year, among all the closures, the s-x, romance, stories, fights and when the parents had to leave her life for her because she didn’t want to go back to them in London.

Though I travelled from Nigeria to San Francisco for business, I found love, so I went back home and came back with some of my family to marry her. Since the Dad Mr. Wilson was bent on marrying her to another they did not honor our invitation to the wedding.


Barbara left home and was staying in San Francisco for close to a year so she made some few friends that made it easy getting married. She was contemplating on going back until she met love and since then we got back to Nigeria.


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Love Me Again

By: Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 3
“A little patience to listen and understand why things happen won’t kill you”

FAST FORWARD TO THE EARLIER MORNING

I was in my office after storming out of the house without breakfast when my secretary rang me, my wife was around, before I could say let her in, Barbara was already in my office with a sad face and lunch box.


Clyde am sorry it happened again, but I brought you lunch. I asked her to leave it on the table and I was on my way out leaving her in my office confused, when she asked where I was going as if she is my boss.


Am sure she didn’t see how I looked at her, because she was still expecting an answer, I responded in a very sarcastic manner; this is a working environment not a kitchen or a restaurant, if you don’t mind I have a meeting to attend, don’t wait up for me, I might be late.


I walked out without turning back. I must admit in the past, Babs brings me food and I never complained, but today I did. We have never had big arguments which would lead to me being rude as I did today but am guessing its just about the food.


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Love Me Again

By Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 4
“After spending an eternity with that someone, there would still be the little stuffs you would need to learn about them over time”


This is how it has been after about 3years of us living together, I suddenly get offended over every little thing i used to laugh at when we were still newbies in our marriage, and I couldn’t help but conclude after 2years of tieing the knot, I out grew those feelings I had.

Barbara and I dated for a year and got married in our second year and after the second year, I realized the love is replaced by hatred.
So basically 3years of living together, I now think we weren’t meant to love each other.

I didn’t think marriage was this much a baggage, you think you know someone well enough to spend your whole life with, but then there are little things you might get to adjust to later.

Later in the evening, while driving back home I kept asking myself why I am so furious over just a little thing.
Was it because it’s becoming a pattern or because I felt she was never like that and might become a problem when we finally start having kids.
Yes! Kids, we’ve been trying since we got married.

We planned on adopting but wanted to give it a little time.
By the time I realized I was home, instantly greeted by my wife.
Darling welcome, how was your day.

I replied fine. She quickly dropped my suit and bag. Rushed to the kitchen to get the dinner table laid whiles I sat there watching TV. Darling food is ready. She knows I like to eat before taking my bath.
We sat to eat and just for her to keep starring at her food.

I ignored once more, and rushed down to the washroom to throw up Barbara what is that! I fumed, she came rushing to the room.
Clyde what is it, are you okay Are you asking me? Ask the food you cooked.

Clyde am sorry, I just…. You just what huh I dashed out and luckily, I was still in my work attire, I took my car keys and left.
I went to a restaurant closer to our house and ordered eba and agushie stew, as I was eating I thought to myself; Barbara is a good cook, never has she cooked such a food for me.

Though I would admit we’ve been having some issues for the past year regarding our feelings for each other, where we barely talked anymore, she knows I don’t joke with my food.

I can’t remember the last time I touched my wife, though she always seemed not to be bothered, I just prayed it wouldn’t come to the time where I had to resort eating outside or beating her up.

But today it has! Well she might have been tired or something is bothering her.
I saw her stare at the food during dinner. She gets that way when she has something bothering her.

At least I know her to that extent. And I always end up being the one to find out everytiime.
I hope she is feeling okay, I asked myself, Aaah Clyde what do you even care.

Yes what do I care, but then it got to a point I get worried when she’s not looking cheerful.
I hurriedly ate and drove home, I saw Barbara sleeping on the couch, there and then I knew she was hurting, old feelings came rushing back in.

I quickly remembered when we were in love and decided to get married.

What happened for me to suddenly feel am falling out of love with my wife.
I carried her upstairs, one thing about Babs is she is cute and easy to carry, while on the way she clinched to my shoulder and slept off I was awoke half of the night starring at her while she slept peacefully beside me.

I felt some adrenaline rushing through my body while I runned my hand through her silky hair that once our happy days makes me droll all over her.
I then cast my mind back to what once was love now hatred.

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EPISODE 5

“Trust is like a pencil, when the edge gets broken, you can sharpen it to a point, but once it gets to the extreme where there is nothing left to sharpen; you lose everything or you tell yourself I got to keep trusting”


I remember I came home one evening and I yelled!

Me: Babs where were you today.

Babs: Darling I have been home doing your laundry all day.

Me: Are you lieing to me right now.

Babs: For Christ’s sake Clyde, have I ever lied to you? And where is this coming from.

Me: I saw you at Mr. Biggs today with Dr. Livie, your gynecologist.

Me: how many times have I warned you not to see him again, not as a friend or your gynaeo?

Me: Answer me Babs, Come here! I dragged Barbara by her hair to my face.

Babs: Clyde you are hurting me, besides, I already told you I was not out today, neither do I have anything doing with Livie.
Ask Mrs Ibe nextdoor, she was doing laundry outside as well.

Me: Oh you guys are now on an informal name basis.

Babs: You are reacting for no reason, call Livie and ask him when was the last time he saw me and Clyde what point of I love you and you are my husband so I see no other man do you not understand.

Every day you seem to have all sort of allegations about Livie and me, to the point of changing my number.

What’s wrong with you? Is this what I travelled so many miles for?
Am pretty sure this is not only about Livie anymore.

Until you are ready to tell me what it is about, I will be waiting but for now do what pleases you.

I am fully aware, am still so much in love with my husband, his grunts, and sense of jealousy these days I must admit make me feel I am losing him slowly but I also knew I have to let it be.

Time will reveal and heal everything.

Me: Are you talking to me like that.
We exchanged words for a while and I ended up not eating that evening and I took over the guest room for a week.

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Love Me Again

By: Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 6
“Egos are deal breakers, don’t carry them with you everywhere”

In the second week, i heard a knock on my door in the middle of the night and it was Barbara.

Babs: Clyde please open the door.

Me: What do you want, am not in the mood for s*x. We can talk in the morning.

Babs: Look am sorry about what happened out there last week, I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way.


And I want you to know I love you so much and if I had to cut off my male friends because of you I will.

Besides I did the last time you saw us over a friendly dinner, just to save my marriage.

That was the last i saw or heard of Livie, so whoever you saw with him recently wasn’t me.

I kept quiet for a long time and since I wasn’t hearing her voice anymore i assumed she had left.

I made it a point to avoid her that morning like i have been doing for the past week, hence skipping breakfast.
From then, we were always at each other’s throat, well basically I was always at her throat.
I do eat what she cooks, but we barely communicated.

I then decided to move back in our bedroom when my mum informed me she was coming over but couldn’t make it.
I know my mum wouldn’t hesitate to take my side when she comes.

My mum, Mrs Obi is the best mum ever, not because she takes my side but even as the only son she knows how and when to rebuke me.

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest thoughts

EPISODE 7

FAST FORWARD TO PRESENT
“Appreciate even the worse character of your partner, don’t try to change it you might lose them, its better you point it out sometimes”

It was Saturday so I knew she might oversleep like she does these days, but was surprised to wake up and Barbara was not beside me, i thought I was watching over her when I carried her in last night.
Did I sleep off, how? I asked myself, walked down to the sitting room and looked all over and there was no sign of my wife.

My eyes caught food on the table, then I remembered yesterday’s experience.

I decided to ignore! I went to meet Ibweke my gateman and asked the whereabouts of my wife, he said she saw her going out.

Her car was parked in the garage, Close to an hour she entered the room.

Babs: Good morning I hope you saw your food.

Me: Yeah, but I didn’t touch it, you can eat yourself.

Babs: sorry about last night, today is better, should I come feed you Darl…

Me: I quickly cut her off before she could finish.
Babs I need no drama this early morning.

Babs: sorry, she walked away in what seems like tears I wished I could console her, but that hatred part of me was holding me back.
The day was uneventful, Babs was in doors throughout until I heard a knock on my door while I was trying to take a nap in the sitting room.
I opened just to see who it was then my demeanor changed.

Dr Livie: Hello Clyde

Me: I stood at the door for some time and he asked aren’t you going to let me in, then I heard my wife’s footstep coming down.

I stepped aside for him to enter and gave a fake smile.

Then my wife came down to meet us, he made way to go hug Babs, and I interrupted saying come on let’s sit here.
Babs see to our guest. He followed me to the sitting area, we exchanged pleasantries.

Babs brought him water and a drink, I gave her a look that would have given her a heart attack if not for the fact that she understood me.
She sat down beside me, then I asked her to get me a drink myself Just to avoid her seeing Livie.

Me: what brings you here today, been a while.

Dr Livie: Can’t I visit my friends and my patient anymore.

Me: yes you can, that was sarcastic, I meant is everything okay since you’ve never been to our house before.

How did you even know our house address. Hope it wasn’t difficult to locate.
I asked just to satisfy my own curiosity.

Dr Livie: Oh how! I have been here on two occasions, but always met your absence.
It seems I always come at the wrong time.
But then, haven’t seen you guys in a while, Barbara hasn’t been to any of her appointments and she keeps ignoring my calls. Wanted to find out if everything is alright.

Just when he mentioned why he was there, Babs came in with the drink and made a gesture to talk but I interrupted.

Me: emmmmmmm, we are around just that…….. I was cut short by Barbara.

I was so furious within me when I heard he was here in my absence.
Then I kept playing some drama’s in my head, what could they have done. OMG!!! Babs you have killed me, I thought.

Babs: I travelled somewhere with my husband for some time,I did see your calls and I definitely planned on returning them, but then wanted to do that when I get back.

I was impressed what a perfect lie my wife has told, I wasn’t sure if Dr. Livie believed but he left after some few minutes on an emergency call he had.

Then I became worried, does he have my wife’s new number, when did he call, was it after or before I changed her line? Immediately he left, I saw him to his car, when I got back, I saw Barbara waiting with folded arms behind the door.

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 8
“Good communication,not just any communication”


Babs: she shove me an eye, are you satisfied now, If you are can we go back to those times of no fighting? I would really love to be at peace with you.

Me: so you can lie perfectly like this, what shows you haven’t been lieing all along?

I kept the part when he mentioned he visited on two occasions to myself, because I wanted to investigate first.

Babs: What do you mean Clyde?

Me: I mean you managed to fool Dr. Livie. What shows everything you have been telling me all this while is true?

Babs: Whatever.

Me: Babs did you just say whatever.

Babs: yes I did, am so tired of this emotional trauma, I mean why am I even still with you if you think I have anything doing with Livie? It doesn’t work that way, am still here because for “better for worse”.

And she tried to walk away, then I shouted on top of my voice, come back here.

Babs: and if I don’t what will you do.

I was so furious to the extent that I grabbed her by the arm and pulled her towards me with the intention to give her the slap of her life, she tripped and fell on her ankle.

Babs fell on the floor once again and groaned.
Selfishly and heartless lyrics, I left her there and walked out of the house.
I heard her say Clyde you are heartless.
I made up my mind while driving out am leaving my matrimonial bed this time for good.
Can’t imagine what my wife had done with Livie in my own house.

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 9
“Not every man in your wife’s life is interested in her; some are genuine friends when they know their stand so don’t open that door”


I tried crawling to the home phone table just to put a call through to someone.

The one person that came to mind, I dialed the number.
'Yes I have his number off head'.

Babs: Livie, Please its Barby.
Knowing very well he doesn’t know our fixed line number, I then said could you please help me, amidst tears.
I told him I fell down and I think I can’t move.

Dr Livie: What, How, don’t worry am turning round, whatever you do don’t risk walking about until I take a look at it.

Babs: Thank you, he kept calling to check in until he got to the house.
While still on the floor, I thought about what has gotten over Clyde lately, at first I could just enjoy the silence treatments but now he is becoming violent, then I heard a knock on my door.

Babs: come in Livie.

Dr Livie: Oooh Barby, it looks serious.

He said while rushing to my end, he sat beside me on the floor with his first aid box.
While checking my leg out and finally deciding what to do to relieve the pain, he kept asking questions.

Dr Livie: Are you sure you just fell, because the magnitude of the fracture is saying something else.
Are you sure you were not pushed.

By the way where is Clyde? Why is he not here? Shouldn’t he be your first call? Are you sure he wasn’t the one who did this to you.

Babs: Livie, please I don’t need you to be inquisitive right now, I am not on one of those your examination tables to be questioned.
Tell me can I walk again, is it that bad.

Dr. Livie:Yes you can walk, but I need to take you to the hospital for an x-ray considering the fact that you can’t walk now.
You know i'm a gynecologist, not that kind of doctor to give you all the answers you need.

Babs: I understand this isn’t your field, but I called you anyway, knowing very well you might know a thing or two.
Can’t you do anything for now to relieve the pain? Whiles I look into the hospital tomorrow if it gets worse?

And by the way, my husband didn’t do this, he went out not long ago and his phone is not reachable, that’s how come you are here now.
Besides you are the only doctor friend I happen to have his number lying around

Dr Livie: Really i'm your friend? You seem to have given me another impression lately, especially earlier when I visited.
I doubted that act you put on there. Well-done Barby.

Babs: Livie, I don’t know what you are talking about, but then do you think I need this blame games right now.
Please help me to my room.

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 10
“Manage your anger when you are around a woman, so you don’t ruin your chance with her”

Within some few minutes I was in my room.
Livie gave me some medicines and I told him I was going to sleep, so he left. Minutes to hours, I heard Clyde on top of his voice, so Barbara you went to report me to your lover.

You even had the guts to bring him in here again.
How dare you. I heard him walking inside and I managed to raise up myself.

Clyde, why are you shouting on top of your voice with my name again?

Yes, Livie came here to do what you couldn’t do, what’s the big deal about that.
You pushed me down and left me to die, is that what you have reduced this marriage to.

And how dare you call me a cheat.

Clyde be careful with your words, silent treatment I can take but not violence.
For some time he was silent when I spoke up, I kept wondering why then he flared up.

Clyde: Oh really, you haven’t seen anything yet.

Me: my dear, I have seen everything, what else is there…. May be you finally kill or divorce me.

He slammed the door while I took a deep breath and relaxed in my bed and I heard his car moving out.
The pain seem to have subsided a little so I called Livie, this time with my new line.

Dr Livie: Hello, who is this? Hey Barby is that you, how are you using a different line but then I hope everything is fine.

Me: Yes thank you, emmmmmmm did you call Clyde about my fall.

Dr. Livie: yes, has he come yet. He said he was already on his way.

Me: Yes he came home not long after you left.
We talked for a while and I hanged up.

The subsequent days were hectic, I could barely walk on my legs but had to go about cleaning and cooking, which Clyde shows no interest in these days? One evening, our friends came to visit us.

Let me tell you a little about our friends; Mr. Oke is a Lawyer and Mrs Oke is a counsellor we met at a conference when I moved to Nigerian with Clyde.

They have been out of the country for some time now.
With them, we share our secrets and every other things close friends do.

I was with them in the sitting room, we talked about life down to my limping leg, and then Clyde came back from work.

Mr.and Mrs:Hey, Man of the House,surprise.

Clyde: when we spoke I didn’t know you were coming down.
They talked for a while and for the first time after our fight, Clyde asked if I have offered our guest something.

I replied and he smiled sheepishly to his guests asking them if they are okay.

They engaged in their normal chats and arguments, i find time to cut in when I can focusing on my phone.

When we meet the Oke’s, we can’t stop talking, arguing about issues.
Mrs Oke suddenly asked; are you okay Barbara.

You look out of this world, then her husband chorused "yes" you don’t look yourself I replied just a little malaria, we talked about it and made funny jokes.
I excused myself and stood up limping on my leg.
Mr. Oke asked if I got the leg checked by a doctor since it has been a while and I still feel pain.

Before I could open my mouth, my husband responded; yes a doctor has seen her I turned and walked away, asking myself what just happened, I brushed it aside.
I wasn’t afraid of going to the hospital myself but I don’t want the doctors asking too much questions.

And then there is my husband who may get into trouble.

I can’t tell if it works that way in Nigeria but it sure does where I came from.

They finally left, and as usual my husband went to his guest room as he has moved there since our last argument. Heartless being I thought.

He now keeps late night and comes home when he wants to, I can’t tell if he works overnight, am just not bothered with the overnights.

But when he comes home looking funny.
I keep cooking and he never touches, I make sure I cook little just in case he doesn’t eat then I can eat myself not to waste the food.


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Love Me Again

By: Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 11
“When you make your mother in-law your best friend, your household will always be a happy one”

It was mother’s day and I called Clyde’s mum.

Maa: Hello my daughter, so nice to hear your voice, so if Clyde doesn’t call for me to talk with you, you wouldn’t call me

Clyde always does the calling and I speak with her.

Me: Maa it’s not that way, been planning to call but you know I want to do that on a special day like this. "Happy mother’s day".

Maa: Thank you my dear, how is everyone, have you heard from your parents since……. Since the wedding I have cut contact with my parents.

Me:No Maa, I will find courage to call them soon.
We spoke for a while and I hanged up, and she asked if am cooking home meal for her son which I replied sarcastically; Who wouldn’t want to do that for the love of their life?

After the call I thought about the food part and I wondered if he had told his mum anything.
I know she will take the sons side but then I will give her the benefit of the doubt if it turns out she knows.
But I doubt she does, since she hasn’t asked me.

She’s one of those mothers who would do anything for their son, So you better not step on her toes or do anything to his son when she is around.

I remember, she came on one of those visits with her husband when we were still married and enjoying our marriage when I sheepishly told the son, I was tired so we should eat out today.
Which he agreed to, it was also a way of hanging out with the family, 'I thought, when she heard me say that, she flared up, is that how I treat his son in this house.

It took a lot of work by my father in law and Clyde to calm her down which i spent a whole week to apologize for before they left the 3rd week.

Since then we became good friends, whenever she visits, I know she likes home meal.

I sat wondering what if I call home for once I picked the phone and dropped it, then for the third time it went through.

Me: hel……….I went mute suddenly on the call.

Mum: hello, who is there, Hello this is Mrs Wilson.

Me: I know this voice like my own blood. That’s our slogan anytime we are playing tricks with our voices with my cousins.

Mum: Barbara is that really you… Oh goodness, how are you calling me now, What happened, are you okay?

Me: Mum relax, am okay and nothing has happened.

Mum: you don’t sound and look good.

Me: eeiii mummy, you will never change, besides you can’t see me.

Mum: my dear, a mother can feel the daughters pains even 1000miles away.

Me: Seriously everything is fine, and am okay, how are my brothers.

Mum: they are doing well, She took her time to brief me about their achievements for the past 3 years I left home.

I couldn’t believe I followed a man to this extent and cut contact with my family.
I had an opportunity to talk to my brothers as well

Mum: Darling won’t you ask of your love?

Me: I know dad is fine, or he definitely will get over the heart break.
I was my dad’s heartbeat, He was my special friend and I know what I did will definitely break his heart.

Mum: He was broken but then still believes you will come home one day.

Me: I hope he is aware am married and my place belongs just here with my husband.

Mum: talking of husbands; how is he treating you? How has marriage been like? Was it what you thought of? Are you happy?

Me: you know too well to ask me this questions right now. Everything is fine, not what I expected but I knew it’s not going to be easy.

Mum: what do you mean, has that guy turned you into a punching bag already.

Me: Mum? No,I mean there is a lot to deal with, But I have grown and looking after somebody else.

Not my mum looking after me anymore. Just then Clyde walked in to the sitting room.

Mum: Is he around, can I officially meet him now.

Me: I don’t think that’s the best way, besides he just got back.

Mum: My daughter, I just want to say Hi.

Me: "okay" hold on whiles I pass on the phone.
I walked to his door and knocked.

Clyde: What is it again woman, am tired of all this your whining’s.

Me: Clyde my mum is on the line for you. Immediately, he opened the door and shoved me an eye.
I handed the phone to him and waited to take it back.

I couldn’t tell what they were talking about close to minutes.
But I did hear Clyde say am taking good care of her. No need to mention, I shrugged! What care, he pushed the phone to me and banged the door to my face.

Mum and I spoke for some time and I hanged up promising to call back.

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 12
“In marriage find a friend that’s got your back always but won’t break your marriage”


Few hours later, my phone rang and it was my friend Bebe, She promised visiting next Saturday We hardly meet up due to the nature of her job but when Clyde and I were still in good terms.


She comes over,we talk, and we do sleep overs, Which whenever it’s my turn to sleep over at her end, Clyde will insist to follow me to her end claiming “two are now one” His favorite love chorus which turns me on somehow.


But now what do I get, I thought for a while. Saturday finally came and Bebe brought with her a lot of goodies.


Clyde was home, they talked for a while and he excused himself claiming he has lots of work Bebe obviously did not buy that, neither did she buy my story of tripping, when I told her about my leg, the reason why I couldn’t come over to her place the next day. She’s always too smart for my liking.


She knows the Clyde she met would never abandon a visitor of his wife not to talk of her best friend just to attend to work, he always say work can wait Even when he had a million dollar contract to work on then, he still made time for his friends and family.


Bebe:Clyde’s Babs, what’s going on here, I smell something fishy.


Me:Bebe I don’t keep fish in my sitting room, it could be the odour from your three months Rasta. We all laughed over it.


I thought I succeeded in changing her mind until she started again.


Bebe: seriously Babs, am your friend… tell me what’s going on or I sure will find out.


Me: Bebe relax there’s nothing to find out, we are fine.


Bebe: Girlfriend you want to kill yourself but I won’t let you, I know what’s going on.


Me: Please spare me the nosy attitude of yours. You know that’s the only thing I don’t like about you right I however know Bebe too well.


When she feels something is wrong she will dig deep until she gets an answer. It’s either i find a nice excuse or she won’t let it slide. I then told her we had a little argument over adoption lately, and I have left him to cool off.


Couples fight, you of all people should understand, You quarrel with Jake your husband all the time over silly stuffs, and how is mine different that I have to be summoned, I finally asked her.


Bebe:Common, what I see here is not a little fight.


Besides I know you guys never had a problem with adoption. Look,let me just tell you this,I saw your husband somewhere some time ago at first I thought he came with you but by the time I realized he drove away.


I saw him again on several occasions And I made some enquiries he frequent there often with different ladies. I didn’t want to cause you any problems here, I came to see things for myself and it hasn’t been easy keeping that to myself.


Me: Bebe, what are you talking about, now my heart just dropped into my stomach, I could barely breathe I took a deep breath and asked are you insinuating my Clyde is cheating on me?


Bebe: I didn’t say that, I just told you where I saw him.


I was never going to tell you this but looking at things here, I think you need to know but please don’t confront him Babs, Babs, Babs, are you ohk? Bebe asked several times before I woke out of my reverie.


Then I saw my husband walking pass us to the kitchen I stood up God knows I was going to beat the hell out of him Bebe held me down, he went back upstairs.


Now I had no choice than to narrate everything to my best friend, we cried together and amidst the tears.


I couldn’t help but say continuously I love you Clyde, why are you treating me this way. Bebe stayed for the night, she planned on helping me get my husband back. Somehow Clyde never came out of his room or has figured I told Bebe something.


We talked a lot, seeing a pastor was out but we resorted on a counsellor. We finally drifted to sleep.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 13
“The answer is not ANGER, sometimes you just need someone to talk to and a shoulder to cry on”


The next morning, everything seemed weird. As Clyde made out of the house without his breakfast as usual, Bebe also left later.


I felt lonely, I called Livie, we talked for a while, and then I thought of my dad. I dialed his number and he picked on the first ring.


Dad: Hello Wilson here, who am i speaking with I couldn’t help myself and I started crying amidst the mention of daddy.


Dad: Barbara is that you, talk to me, what’s going on I quickly hanged up and laid on my bed, sleep came unannounced.


When I woke up, I missed 11 calls, 9 from my family and 2 from Bebe. I quickly called her first and she said she’s on her way to my end so I decided to wait, While contemplating on whether to call my family back.


I knew I had to at a point. Bebe came over and we talked for a while on which counsellor to see I suggested our friend Mrs Oke, I decided to call her and book an appointment since with her, Clyde wouldn’t object. She was free that afternoon so Bebe and I drove there.


Mrs Oke: How are you my friend, you got me worried after the call. I hope everything is okay with you.


Me: Julia, that’s her first name. Everything is not okay, I then narrated to her what has been the issue for close to a year and a half now.


Mrs Oke: Barbara I knew it the moment the small talks started between you guys when we visited You guys seemed different from the Clyde and Barbara we knew, But then we thought you guys were having a bad day, So I told Bryan to let it go.


Me:How did you figure that out, were we that obvious? And why didn’t you say anything.

Julia: We are friends, and friends know each other so well. But then what do you need from me now. How do you want to go about it?


Me: I know he respects you a lot, at first I thought it was just something that will blow away soon.


But now am pretty sure it’s beyond that, and I can’t stand and watch myself go through this pain I was enduring it hoping it will be over soon.


I just need my husband back, he seems too far away, but I know he listens to you May be you can convince him for the counselling sessions, I really need to know what my offense was, why he is treating me this way.


Julia: Alright my dear, will talk to my husband and see if he can be present for the counselling session Please take it easy, we will talk him through this.


Me:Thank you, we gave each other a hug and I left with Bebe, who was just sitting staring at us throughout my meeting with Julia. She dropped me home and drove away.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 14
“When you tell mama and Dada about your marriage baggage, mama and Dada will always remember when you have forgotten”


As soon as I entered the room, I saw Clyde with a paper sitting on the couch, I walked pass him and he yelled. Hey you, don’t you know how to greet?


I turned and muttered good evening, He just threw the paper i saw him holding earlier to my face I picked it up, made an attempt to read but I just couldn’t I dropped to the floor and started crying.


He stood up and walked pass me upstairs, there and then I found the need to call my dad. Because I am definitely going back home just that this time with a broken heart. But I dare not tell my Dad that part of my story.


Me: Hello dad, it’s your baby girl. He complained of calling several times which I apologized for.

I was surprised even though I was at the verge of losing my marriage to a divorce Which was just thrown out to my face as if the past years meant nothing, I had the courage to stop crying when I heard my dad’s voice.


Dad:Baby, how have you been, how is marriage, your mum told me you aren’t fine. Has that man succeeded in destroying you?


Me: Dad, not again, that man is my husband. Whatever mum has told you is not true. I am fine, you worry too much for nothing and thank you for not forgetting me.

Dad: and why is your voice trembling, Talk to me or I will come down to Nigeria and whisk you away.


Me: Dad I called because, I miss you and wanted to clear the tension between us and apologize for not following your orders.


Dad: baby I have forgiven you, but promise me if you ever need any kind of help, Your home will always be yours.

Whatever it is, I wouldn’t bring my parents into my marriage, not ever I have already failed the third party rule but then I trust the people around me right now.


Just then Julia called and said she heard from her husband about the divorce papers. Apparently Bryan has spent a week trying to talk Clyde out of it but he has refused, So we should all meet tomorrow.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 15
“Take a minute when making life time decisions, ask yourself can I forgive myself easily when the need arises so you don’t end up with million regrets”

Early the next day, Bebe came waiting to take me to Julia’s office.

We got there, just when my husband came in from wherever he has been spending the night these days.


Julia: You are all welcome, so as you are all aware of situations.

My husband and I will like to know your minds.


If you are for the counseling or you still want to go ahead with the divorce.

Me: to decide I just wanted to know what wrong I have done to deserve this kind of broken marriage.

Julia spoke up.

Clyde over to you, answer your wife.


Clyde:Julia I don’t have to give an explanation to this lazy cheat of a wife.

Bebe nearly slapped him with those eyes of hers, surprisingly I was just so calm.

Julia: you think your wife cheated on you or you know she has and still does and please no insulting of each other, let’s be calm and find solution to this problem.

Clyde:I know she has with that doctor friend of hers, Livie.

Please I just don’t want to be married to her anymore.

Me:You know and you have evidence of that?


Cut me that crap, between you and me, who always meet his partners at the Majestic Hotel in Lagos, huh! And you dare call me a cheat.


Livie and I were good friend until you told me to stop seeing him, Which I did because I love you.


What wouldn’t I do for your happiness? I love you, and there was no other man as you think.

Can’t a woman have male friends anymore when she is married?

I don’t know where that is coming from, but I always tell you whenever I need to meet Livie.


You sometimes tag along, what’s the problem again.

When did you start distrusting me as the love of your life?

I mean I lost my family because of you, do I have to lose something for you again.

My good friend, yes; I lost him too for you What again, Clyde, answer me.


Clyde: you are here lamenting like an angel, as if you don’t know what am talking about.


It wasn’t once, it wasn’t twice. I saw you guys together.


Me: infact I don’t know what you are talking about, Just tell me when and what you mean you saw us together.


Clyde: Am not here to argue with a tramp like you, besides he has seen whatever he needs to on the examination table. Do you have to go offering again?


Me:Bryan, have you made the adjustment to the papers as I asked last night.


Bryan: Yes I did, but are you sure of what you want to do?

Clyde: what adjustments is she talking about Bryan? Talk to me.


Bryan: your wife doesn’t want anything from you as you stated in your divorce paper, she just wants about two months to get herself back to San Francisco.

She doesn’t need your help, she can sort herself out.


Clyde: And you didn’t tell me that because, well that’s not a problem, so far as she’s out of my hair in 2months, am fine.


Besides she can afford to transport herself back, she can run to Livie for help that’s all she’s good at these days.


Me:You think this is about needing someone or money I already had money before you met me, so don’t make it seem like, I go offering myself to men for money.


Trust me, you will live to regret this Clyde, and when you do,it will be too late.


Because there will be nothing left to salvage, Now pass me that piece of paper, I grabbed it from Bryan and signed.


Julia and Bryan thank you so much. Will call later.


I grabbed my handbag and Bebe confused as to what I just did, as she never spoke a word in there.

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 16
“It’s okay to cry sometimes, it gives you the clarity you need”


I was silence throughout our drive home which Bebe insisted I stay at her end.

I called Livie later at Bebe’s end, he came confused as to what i was blubbing about over the phone.

Now it’s Bebe’s turn to speak; I hope the allegations made against her are not true I trust my friend wouldn’t do anything like that, but it’s you I don’t trust.

Come down, I said amidst tears.

Livie: am surprised all these went on and madam here never bothered to tell me about it.

I admit I like Barbara but as a friend, besides I have a partner of 5 years.

5 years? Bebe retorted! Wow, so why are you not married yet, 5 years is a long time.

Livie: we just understand each other, we are practically married already, and just the ring is missing We both hate the idea of putting on a ring.

We signed our own vows, hanging on our wall and that’s it, we are married Or whatever we call it, we are happy with each other, and Barby here knows my wife so well.

They met several times over coffee, after I introduced them.

So I don’t know what your husband is talking about.

Bebe: wow, I like this. Well am glad I don’t have to worry about you.

Livie: My partner will say this is stupid.

Me:that’s fine, am sure I will be okay.

Just greet Malia for me when you get home.

Livie: If you ever need anything don’t hesitate I left the next day to my house, well that’s not my house anymore Just for Clyde to question my whereabouts last night.

Clyde: where do you think you are coming from?

Me: Does that concern you, or didn’t you read my terms and condition of living in this house.

If you haven’t; it says I have no obligation towards you and am free to go where I want to and bring home whoever I want to So clear off my face, or you will see the other side of me For once, I like the way am handling a heartbreak.

Maybe because somehow am still stupidly in love with him.

I woke up late, since it was a Saturday, walked to the kitchen and met my ex-husband trying to fry egg which am not sure he has ever done.

The last time he tried it was a disaster, so I intentionally stroll around pretending I was looking for something I couldn’t find. He keeps looking back to see what I was doing, then I heard him shout, ‘ouch’

He burnt his hand while trying to hold the handle of the pan with once again his disastrous fried egg.

He got it burnt again, I couldn’t help but laugh I quickly fixed my own egg, and sat beside him at the table. He gave me a look which I have never seen before.

Was he starting to regret?

I just gave him the rest of my egg and left to the kitchen.

He seemed like he wouldn’t take it, so l left it on the table. I walked pass and he has eaten it, leaving his burnt one for the dog I think I smiled to myself and went upstairs.

Days passed by, and I realized I had to tell my parents I would be home in about some few weeks I was sitting outside by the pool one Saturday when I saw my ex-husband, in a polo shirt and his favorite jean trousers.

Those were the same i gave to him as a gift on several of our shopping journey’s we use to go on I stared at him for a couple of minutes, my tears started to flow I told myself, I was never going to cry again, last week, but here am I now.

I quickly wiped my face with the back of my hand, am I starting to regret signing that paper I saw him walking towards his car, he looked so much handsome in that polo shirt now, unlike before I always tease him, the shirt looks on him like he just came out of a 30 days fast.

I kept watching him until he drove out, I was cooking lunch when Livie informed me he was going to come over with Malia. I thought that was a bad idea, but then I remembered I had no obligations towards Clyde so I can decide to do whatever I want to.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

Episode 17
“Whatever you do violence is not the answer”


In fact I was hoping they come whiles he is still at home, but then they came in a little early. I was inside talking with Malia, while Livie wanted to pick up his phone from the car parked outside.

Suddenly we heard some yelling’s outside. Malia and I quickly rushed out, and saw Clyde holding Livie’s shirt at his neck.

Clyde however was trying to beat the hell out of Livie. We rushed to their end and Livie gave us a sign to pause and do nothing.

Clyde: What the hell are you doing here in my house?

Livie: I came to see your ex-wife, since she has no obligation towards you anymore And you decided to let a good woman walk away just because of your stupidity and jealousy I came to check on her. Do you have a problem with that?

Clyde: Did you just call me stupid. Well it’s not your fault, you got what you always wanted, now you can put on my shoes.

I knew all those gynecologist appointments were just a means of sleeping with my wife. After several yelling’s and insults from one end to another, I saw myself yelling out so loud.

Livie: Look, man you are making a big mistake here.

You know a man slept with your wife, when you catch them red handed or you come face to face with the other guy. You should be able to tell right now I don’t have a thing for your wife.

I never did If I did, she would be running into my arms, just after her divorce. She isn’t that cheap, like the street ones you pick up.

Ooh you think I don’t know, Ruby, Mercy, Chinaza, should I continue, I have a whole list, I knew all along. I could have told your wife but then I wanted you guys to work your own thing out, When I found out you guys were having a problem.

The last time I visited was to confirm my suspicions, after I confronted some of the ladies after you guys met.

Me: Livie and you never told me anything, what the hell is wrong with everybody around me. Malia you knew too?

Malia: Was just trying to do well by my husband, we agreed, your problems are ours but then we wouldn’t be part of breaking your marriage. We tried reaching out several times to find out if you guys are okay, but then we couldn’t really talk about it.

Me: So that was what all these coffee meet ups, the how are you text messages were all about, and am thinking anytime I receive those messages from you malia, you guys might have met this cheat of a husband somewhere.

Malia: It wasn’t an easy topic to decide to talk about in just a day Me: So this started when and you two never bothered to talk about it right?
All this time, Clyde was still face to face with Livie with his shirt in his grips.

Clyde:So you want to tell me you didn’t sleep with my wife, you liar.

And I can see you brought a camouflage of a wife, You both think you can fool me. Malia or whatever you call yourself.

You believe this cheat of a man and this tramp of a wife here I then shouted stop it now on top of my voice, when I heard Clyde call me a tramp. He immediately let go of Livie.

Malia and Livie tried to reach out to me on the floor and I slowly told them to leave me alone and leave my house, as if it was still mine
I picked up myself from the floor and went inside. That coward of a husband left the house like he always does.

What he didn’t know is I was waiting patiently for him this time I have been hurt too much not to do anything I waited until 1 am when I heard his car enter the compound I quickly opened the door when I heard him turning the knob.

Me: Welcome you cheat, take a seat there.

Clyde:What is this? In my own house? Really?

Me: I said take a seat, or I will beat the hell out of you now.

Clyde: And you want what now? I quickly dragged him to the seat, bringing the gun behind the door, holding a gun to his head.

He forgot he brought his father’s hunting gun to our house when he said he wanted to take me on a hunting journey. Clyde quickly sat down,and made several attempts to talk but with the gestures I made with the gun he couldn’t.

Me: I think I have been quiet enough, this is my time to ask questions. I need correct answers, or you will see the other side of me.

Me:How long have you been seeing those girls? He wasn’t responding, I threatened with the gun again.

I said how long have you been cheating on me with those whores Answer me you coward, I hit him with the gun on his head and watched him yell out.

I said how long has it been?

Clyde: 6 to 7 months, I think.

Me: Wow, you think?

Really. I was about to cry but I realized if I do I might not achieve anything here yet. Why?

I mean i gave you everything, my life, my body, my heart, Or was it something I wasn’t doing right? To the best of my knowledge we had no issues, with our s-x life,so am asking you why?

Clyde:Why? Because you cheated on me and you think you are that good in bed? Common Babs you and I know you fake it sometimes.

Me:Wrong answer, you think I cheated on you? Or you know.

And what makes you think I fake it, Besides should that be the reason why you should rip my heart out that way?

Tell me what exactly, when or where, because I can’t remember a thing. Clyde: I don’t know what you want to achieve here, but this is like kidnapping, I can sue you.

Me: Go ahead, if you are a man.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 18
“A mother in-law who rebukes their children for their wrong doing rather than supporting is a real keeper”


Just then I heard a car pull in the compound and I saw my mother in law coming out I then shoved my eyes at him and asked; so you called your mum here to do what.

I am waiting to see what she will do, she better not try anything funny or else she will smell pepper I left him there, and saw him walking towards the door to meet her mum.

Still scratching and checking his head out. I was in my room, and his mother came knocking.

I welcomed her and she enquired why I didn’t come down to see her, I told her I was asleep and had no idea she was around. We talked for a while and I decided to cook dinner just for the sake of those days.

After laying the table, i told them I was not hungry and then was going upstairs when she insisted i just sit with them. It was so weird at the table, I just kept burning inside, How this man destroyed my life and still had the guts to eat my food.

They finally finished and I packed up the table and kitchen, just went straight to my room to sleep Woke up to an annoying knock on my door, it was my mother in law.

Maa: We need to talk.

Me: By this time?

Maa: Yes, besides its just 3 am. And I need an explanation to why Clyde is sleeping on the couch.

And don’t tell me nothing, like he did last night, I noticed how weird and silent the whole house is since yesterday I arrived I know you guys, but your husband told me nothing.

Me: Maa with due respect, since your son told you nothing is going on, I think it should remain that way.

Maa: Come with me downstairs.

We walked to the living room and found Clyde sleeping on the couch His mum woke him up immediately while he struggled to get the sleep off his eyes.

Clyde: What is it again, I want to sleep Then he opened his eyes and saw me sitting on one of the sofas
Clyde: What did you tell my mum?

I hope whatever you told her, you included the fact that you cheated on me with your gynecologist and tried to shoot me down this evening with my father’s gun, if she hadn’t showed up, only God knows what would have happened.

His mum shoved me an eye, and surprisingly, the mother in law, i thought i knew was somebody else for once I was always under the impression she supports the son even when he goes wrong.

The only thing she managed to say was OMG.

That was it, she stood up and off she went to her room. Without asking to hear my side of the affair tale.

I can’t tell how I managed through the night, but I woke up late and Clyde was not home My best guess was he left for work.
I met my mother in law at the dining table, chewing on something.

Maa: My daughter, you are awake, how was the night I was shockprised, couldn’t utter a word for a minute, when I finally found my voice I managed to say, yes Maa am fine.

She asked to join her at the table which I did, apparently she was waiting for me but couldn’t wait anymore so she took the lead.

I contemplated on eating her breakfast, as I don’t know what is going through her mind, but if she had wanted to harm me, am not sure I would be awake now. We ate in absolute silence, until getting to the end of packing up the table she asked to see me when am done.

I finished washing up, took along my copy of the divorce paper and headed downstairs I met her already in deep thoughts I decided to start the conversation as I know what she wanted to talk about.

Me: Maa before you say anything, I want you to know,I would never do anything to hurt your son, before I could finish my sentence, she cut in.

Maa: I know you didn’t cheat on my son my daughter, I know my son so well. He was a lot of things before he got married, though I understand he changed for you.

Anytime he becomes so insecure and aggressive with someone cheating on him I know he is lieing, besides you aren’t the first one he’s done that to.

The only difference from the earlier one’s are you guys are married. I know it might resurface again, those traits.

I don’t know how much he told you about his past when you guys decided to spend your life’s together. I was thankful he found someone who could love him despite his past, I know I defend my son too much sometimes.

But yesterday, I looked into his eyes when he was talking about you, I know my son too well and when he is lieing, I know my son too well, when he starts his things, I can tell if he is lieing or not so don’t worry, I believe you cannot hurt a fly.

She called several times before I came out of my reverie, simply because I was dumbfounded.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 19
“Once a Casanova, always a Casanova, you only believe you are that bad if you lack the overcoming spirit”



Yes I know about my husband’s past, he told me he was a “Casanova”, but then I trust him after we realized we are so much in love with each other and can’t go a day without feeling what I know is love but now hatred.

I loved him despite his numerous ladies he slept with in the past, I understood, his looks got him that far. Was I selfish to want to keep him all to myself, or I was stupid to marry a fine Casanova.

Just when I was busy thinking about his past, my mother in law spoke up.

Maa: My daughter, how can I change this great damage that has been done?

Am sure you have already taken in enough of his lies, And how he would defend himself when he is caught cheating.

I know he cheated, the same thing he did to the many ladies we wanted him to marry, They all left, but you stayed. He told us, he got his act together, and I can clearly see that’s not true.

Me: Maa, this is beyond repairs, I then showed her the divorce papers.

Maa: What? How? When? Then how are you still here. I narrated to her my proposal to stay for at least two months.

Me: Look I love your son, but if he doesn’t want me anymore, I have to leave that wasn’t my decision, it was his and I accepted my fate the moment I signed those papers.

My intention was to stay for this two months and check if there are any regrets from his end but he is not going to change now, I have to get going too, my tickets and visa would be ready very soon.

Maa: You sure you don’t want to give it another try?

Me: Yes Maa, I want to get back home to the family I have left behind for this one which only ripped my heart out.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 20
“The pains we feel makes us stronger, though we may cry along the line”



I seemed strong but I can break down anytime soon. I just pray for strength, though I had no idea what going on my knees to pray will do for me.

After a week, I got so much worried he hasn’t shown up yet, I called her mum and she told me she hasn’t heard from him I asked myself why I was worried.

I was in my room, after a week and 2 days since he left home and I heard his car moving in I peeped through the window to check if he was the one, after confirming I laid on my bed, while informing the mum he was back.

She muttered thank you and we hanged up Since then, it was I dodging him or he does I finally told my parents I was returning home They were so happy so didn’t ask too much questions.

Am sure they will when they realize I had no plans of leaving.

However, no day passes without lots of regrets clouding my judgments I wished things were different, but they are not, and I have to start leaving soon.

My plans are almost ready, telling my parents speed up the process with their numerous links. Bebe never stopped calling, neither did the Oke’s
Livie and Malia called later on to apologize after the last fight.

I admire what they have, no matter how much Clyde painted the story in front of Malia.

She said she knows what her man can do, he is a lot of things but not a cheat and if he ever cheats, he wouldn’t have the guts to introduce the woman he is cheating on her with.

They are not perfect but this is what every couple should learn,You trust your partner to the extent that when the truth hits you in the face, you can still stand up for them.

I don’t know how I can get rid of this love, but I think with time, it will diminish I must admit I do love my husband despite the divorce and he ripping my heart apart.

But somehow I still feel he is there and never going anywhere I was coming back one afternoon after a visit to the embassy and I met Clyde and a lady coming out of the room.

Their appearance and demeanor shows what they are clearly as if I wasn’t bothered, I just walked pass them to the room I quickly closed the door and started crying all over again.

I am now accepting the fact that my marriage is finally over I started packing up my things, the one’s I came here with. I left behind the things I acquired with Clyde, I want nothing that will remind me of him Before he came back, I left to Bebe’s end.

I called up my Dad, to help finalize the papers I can’t wait for another two weeks as the embassy stated. He tried putting words in my mouth, but I refuse to tell them anything even though I know at a point, I have to after a week at Bebe’s.

Clyde never bothered to find out why I never came back home. It’s not like it bothers me that much, but at least I was hoping he did.


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Love Me Again

By: Loudest thoughts

EPISODE 21
“Goodbyes are not forever”


The next week, I was on my way to the airport. Bebe and Jake escorted me I saw myself at Heathrow airport the exact time I needed to be there in London.

My parents picked me up, everyone was in tears, but I was crying for another reason I left London for close to 5 years now, am back but with nothing Well, I still have a life to get back to, I assured myself.

We finally arrived home, and nothing has changed My entire family, nuclear, extended and friends were waiting to welcome me home
I had to really dodge the whereabouts of your husband question, but I knew I may not avoid forever. Soon enough everyone left, and I was alone in my room when mummy came in.

Mum:How was your journey?

Me:fine thank you, to be honest it was so hectic and am glad am finally home. Can’t wait to get back to my life.

Mum:Oh really, How are you here alone, How is your husband, why didn’t he come with you.

Me: mum am tired, and too many questions at a time won’t help.

Mum: okay my daughter, we will talk later, welcome back once again. Weeks passed and I keep avoiding the topic anytime we are having a family time.

As if I was hoping Clyde would come back for me soon and this nightmare of ever telling my parents they were right from the beginning would give me some relief.

A month of my return, no day passed by without wishing Clyde was here with me.

Bebe never stopped calling, the rest call once a while. I was on phone with Livie and he was asking if I found someone else and I replied one heart break and a divorce is enough.

I wasn’t ready to go through it again Just then my mum entered, Barbara, what did that man do to you exactly I can see it in your eyes, I can feel you went through something terrible And I just heard you are divorced, OMG!

Your father will kill this man.

Me:Mum, stop yelling, yes am divorced, that’s what you and Dad wanted all along

It’s over now, that’s all to it. You can leave now Suddenly tears engulfed me as if my tear duct just got opened. I cried uncontrollably until my mum wrapped her arms around me in a quick and calm hug.

We stayed that way for quiet some minutes, until mummy spoke up.

Mum: am sorry you had to go through this.

I can’t imagine how difficult that was. But if you are not ready to talk about it, I will wait until you are. Now get some sleep.

Me:Okay mum, thank you.

But I can’t talk to Dad, His anger I can face but the embarrassment and that I told you so, I can’t take it. Please talk to him for me.

Mum:That’s not a problem, we are just glad you are back home in one piece. I quickly laid myself on the bed, which she covered me with a blanket like she always do when we were children. I woke up somewhere late at night and saw my dad dozing off in the sofa beside my bed.

He might have pulled it from its initial state Obviously my mum didn’t waste time to tell him about the divorce.
I quickly muttered Daddy and he woke up immediately asking if am okay.

I told him I was fine, he shouted out for my mum who quickly rushed in with a serving tray, which I assumed is my dinner? I asked what was going on, and they were behaving so weird.

Mum:You slept for close to 10 hours, we were just so worried.

Me: Mum, am fine, I was just so tired from the journey that’s all.

Dad: Baby eat something please.

Me: Okay, I will definitely eat but not in here, Besides you guys don’t have to treat me like I just buried someone close, common, it’s just a divorce.

Am almost over it, you don’t have to pamper me. So I don’t feel embarrassed about my failed marriage, which I know you two are so overjoyed about

Dad:Barbara, stop it now, You think a parent will be happy to see the daughter go through this kind of thing.

Yes we are glad you are back safely to your home, and we were not in support of your marriage, but we never wished you harm.

Can’t a father pamper his baby girl anymore? Or we should have thrown you out when you came rather than welcoming you with an open arms, Or you think we actually prayed for you to fail in your marriage.

Me: Dad am sorry, I guess this whole thing is yet to hit me so hard, And am just finding an easy way out trying to give the blame to you guys. He just stood up and left, mummy runned after him with the food tray

I think this is the reality, Clyde is gone, he is no more mine. Let me get out there, get some real work to occupy my time and mind
All my life I have never done anything for myself like a real job. I keep volunteering all over.

Daddy’s big idea of me becoming his successor of the company since my brothers are still young. I do go in to his work place sometimes to run things, I will wait for him to cool down so I ask for that opportunity to be given to me once more.

I went downstairs and dad was not there, my brothers as usual were fighting over their video games then I went back to my dad’s door, I knocked severally before he asked to come in.

Me:Daddy, I said am sorry now, with that weird Nigerian tone. I rushed to give him a tight hug, which he had no option to hug back.

Dad:you get me worried when you rebel and talk to me that way I hope you are fine, I know your mum promised you she wouldn’t ask for details But I wish you could tell me, but then I won’t push you. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about it that’s fine.

Me:Dad can you let this one pass please, I want to start afresh by going back to my duties at work.

Dad:Really, thank you my dear.

Now I can rest for sometime We talked for a while until I decided I was going in for some coffee, since it’s late for heavy food.

The next day I was ready for work, my dad gave me a tour of the office, nothing has changed that much. My office space was still intact, I quickly got myself involved in work Day after day, I receive so much pampering from my parents, which is getting me worried.

When they start like that, they have something up their sleeves.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 22
“Don’t wait until you regret a wrong deed before you say sorry, Say it once the deed is done”

CLYDE’s DIARY



Days and months passed by there is no show of Babs around the house, I asked the gate man and he has no idea where she went to
I wasn’t bothered.

I thought she was just avoiding me, since her wardrobe is still intact, Little did I know she took only the things she brought with her.

I went about my daily activities, from the clubs to restaurants I wasn’t ashamed of my life After work one day, I wanted to get something from Mr. Biggs for dinner since I can’t cook I was about leaving the place after getting my order, when my eyes caught up with Livie and Babs.


I only saw Barbara’s side cheeks but I can see Livie clearly. I quickly told myself, today their cup is full I quickly walked towards their table where they were taking selfies.

And started shouting, Barbara today your cup is full.

Then Livie saw me and instantly stood up, everyone is watching us now.

I then shouted, Babs name and tapped her on the shoulder, she turned and I realized I was mistaken, this strange woman I always see Livie with isn’t my Barbara, it’s a look alike, but how?

They look so much alike, the walk and especially her cheeks.

The last thing I heard was, Clyde is that you? Are you okay, the way you are referring to my sister as Barbara I hope you aren’t hallucinating.

By the time I realized where I was after that incident was on my steering wheel, driving to no particular place in mind. I may never be able to tell how I managed to leave the scene I created earlier.

I finally stopped at the thought of what if I was wrong all along, I quickly changed my thoughts to; remember she cheated that’s why she left I cleared my mind after some hours sitting alone and realizing I may never find answers to what am looking for sitting down in my car.

I quickly drove home, and questioned my gate man.

Me: Do you remember your madam’s friend, the doctor I was exchanging words with the last time.

He said he was here two times before he visited again the last time. Do you know when he came and what he did when he came around.

Gate man: Oh, the doctor Oga, he came first time with some two women to see Madam, and second time he came with the other woman. Some fine woman.

They were very happy due to the laughs coming out from the veranda, I can’t tell what they were doing inside, but they sure look so happy and having fun.

Me: Thank you, I managed to mutter, I was confused and disappointed I didn’t find anything incriminating enough to confirm what I have been blubbing about along. Could this just be a mistake?

Did I blame my wife for something she didn’t do? I went inside my room, sat for a long time, tried several times to keep the new drama out of my mind but I couldn’t. What about the text messages on her other line.

Of course she hasn’t read most of them so she can’t confirm. I need to get to the bottom of this.

I went ahead to Bab’s room, which am fully aware she hasn’t been to the house in a long time. I looked around, there and then I realized most of her things are not in place.


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Love Me Again

By: Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 23
“Communication is the root of every relationship, even the very little things needs to be talked about”



I quickly called my mum, to find out if she knows the whereabouts of Barbara, She only told me to carry my own cross It’s not like I have confirmed anything yet, but I feel like my heart will explode.

The next day I went to Bryan and Julia’s house I knew very well, I lost them the minute I decided to embarrass them that way
But luckily they were so accommodating, they told me they have no idea where Barbara is.

But I don’t believe them, I don’t blame them either, I just wanted a meeting between Livie and Malia, so I can get some explanations as to why he kept sending my wife secret messages.

I just hope they agree to come, But then what do I do with the truth am looking for Why didn’t I look for the truth rather at first? At this point a lot of things are going through my mind. Just then Bryan called; Livie has refused to see me.

I then called Bebe, after millions of apology she agreed to see me. She came to my place later in the evening.

Me: Please have a seat, what do I offer you.

Bebe: keep the drink to yourself and keep this conversation short.

Me: First of all am sorry, I know it wouldn’t change anything but I just wanted to know the whereabouts of my wife.

Bebe: your wife, have you forgotten how you threw a divorce paper into her face, Like she meant nothing to you after all these years.

For your information, I don’t know her whereabouts, Even if I do there is no way I will give out that information to you.

Me: Bebe please, I agree I might have messed up, I just wanted to clear my doubts.

Bebe: Really, Clyde you still talk about doubts when I thought you have finally come to your senses.

You know I think I should leave now, I can’t sit here and you insult my friend again, after all she has no obligation to you anymore.

Bebe stood up to leave and all I could say is am sorry I couldn’t fathom what I was saying the sorry for, but I feel some tiny guilt and regret
There and then, I called up Livie’s hospital to book an appointment for the next day.

I just couldn’t wait to get to the bottom of this. I was finally called in to Livie’s office and he was like, you want to see a gynecologist or you brought someone with you.

Me: Livie you know why am here, could we please sit somewhere and talk.

Livie: This is my working environment, whatever you have to say can wait maybe when I close from here, I will see what I can arrange I just heard Livie saying next, then I knew I had to leave.

I checked their notice board and realized he will be closing in about 5 hours I told myself I can wait, I was there close to 7 hours, until he came out and I runned after him like a puppy running after his mum.

Until he waited and luckily didn’t ask any questions, he just told me to follow him.

We got to a house with a giant gate, I assumed that was his house, we entered and parked both our cars. He called out to malia, who quickly came out beaming with smiles and gave Livie a hug then noticed I was standing at the door, she quickly withdrew and said Hello you are welcome.

She asked me to come in and have a seat, they both excused themselves for about two minutes, I could hear tiny voices in the kitchen as to they want to agree on what to tell me then they came out malia headed upstairs with Livie’s bag and Livie with a tray of juice I smiled, exchange of responsibility.

Livie: My wife will join us soon, oh there she is.

We officially exchanged pleasantries and I asked if I could talk Me: I apologize for causing your household some kind of disrespect, but am here to find some answer.

With what happened at the restaurant, I understand now why Barbara insisted she wasn’t the one.

That could only mean whatever messages I saw on her old line, I might have been mistaken too.

Livie: Which messages, from which number. I don’t get you Clyde.

Clyde: I have them here, from your number Livie take a look at it, I handed over Barbara’s phone to Livie.

I remember when I first saw the messages they really didn’t mean anything to me that much I thought it was just a friendly message until I met you guys severally at the restaurant which she denied.

I nearly believed until my secretary also confirms meeting you and Barbara there some time ago.

Malia: These messages were not from my husband, yes I admit that’s his number but we exchanged our second numbers a year ago I guess by then Barbara might have saved it with Livie’s name.

You can even see it saved Livie 2?

How could you distrust your wife this way, over just a simple message like this ones? What is wrong with saying I miss you or thanks for coffee, let’s do this again I can’t believe you could hurt a good woman over this kind of messages It just shows you don’t love her or even trust her.

Me: OMG!

Am so sorry, I just can’t believe I was this stupid. Yes I admit I had a little personal issues.

I battled with some weird feelings but I think I have gone too far I quickly muttered and they all agreed to my loudest thoughts Me: How can I make this right Livie, you are the only one who can tell me where I can find Babs.

Livie: And what exactly do you think you can achieve, besides I have no idea where Barby is, Even if I do I don’t think she will want me to tell you.

Please am not sure I want to be involved in this anymore than I have already.

We talked for a while and after several pleas they refused to tell me where Babs is. I went home so heart broken, for once I can see clearly now.

All feelings came rushing back in, I remembered how much my life changed after meeting Barbara.

How much a Casanova I wasn’t anymore, how much loving her changed me? I want all that back, at least if she doesn’t want me anymore, I just want her forgiveness.

Days passed by with no luck of finding Barbara, my parents weren’t willing to help either.

I got drunk one day and took a taxi to Bebe’s end. She had no option than to take me in for a few days.

Most times I overheard her talking on phone with someone my gut tells me it’s Barbara because they seem to be arguing a lot.

After some few more days, she drove me home and told me i should start from where I found love. I might definitely find love there again I thought she was giving me a hint as to where Barbara left to.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest thoughts

EPISODE 24
“I will travel so many miles to tell you I love you again”


So the next few weeks I made preparations for my travel to San Francisco On my arrival, I went to several places I know Barbara usually frequent but to no avail.

For three weeks, "I got nothing'

Until one evening I met one of Barbara’s numerous friends back here who after narrating everything to her had pity on me.

Though she lost contact with Barbara after we left probably because I changed her number she managed to give me her dad’s company name.

Apparently it’s a well-known and popular company in London; THE WILSON’s


I thanked her so much and took her line, just in case everything works out she can talk to Barbara again.The next two days, I spent shopping for Barbara, I don’t know what she likes now Until I ended up buying nothing at all.

The third day I left for London, got there late so I booked a Hotel for myself which I had no intention of leaving now until I get my woman back
I relaxed for 2days planning on how to get through to Barbara on paperThe next day, I got a hired car, for the rest of my stay in London.

I was just so sure I will leave with Barbara soon. I had so much luck in locating her dad’s company with the help of the driver.

I was just going to find out their house address from the receptionist because I had no idea she has started working in the same company she was running from I got to the receptionist, and met some handsome guy there waiting to see someone Just then the receptionist called out to him.

Receptionist: Hello sir, Miss Barbara Wilson will see you in just five minutes.

Handsome Guy: Thank you I got confused as to whether she works here now, so I got closer to the receptionist and asked if Barbara works here now, she told me she resumed work a month ago and hoping to take over from the Dad once he retires.

I asked enough questions just to be sure it was my Barbara.

I was so nervous when I saw the guy going up to see Barbara I waited outside in my car to catch up with Babs when she closed for the day but to no avail.

The next day I woke up early to stalk at her company gate but yet still nothing. A week after waiting in the reception, I saw a figure walking to her car outside which I had no doubts it was Barbara.

She has become so much beautiful, with her curvy hips and her beautiful black hair With her 7 inches heel, her beautiful official wear, she modeled to her car, i tried running after her but then I got glued at one place.

But I managed to get her car number and colour which I can follow later some other day.

For now am in so much pain, so much shock as to seeing my Babs again. I went back to the hotel, to get some rest, where I would continue the stalk tomorrow.

The next day, finally came and as early as 5 am, I was in front of Babs Company I waited until she pulled in at 6 am, I was wondering why the boss would come to work this early Just then I saw her coming out with some files and I followed her car.

At a point I felt she knew our car was following her because she kept looking in her mirror to see the driver. We kept avoiding until she pulled in front of a huge and beautiful mansion, the gate is controlled remotely, so there is no way I can storm in there and ask of Babs.

So I stood far away, when she entered, and I left.

Now I know where she stays and work, so it’s very easy to talk to her. I took some days off my stalking, when I started again I realized she hasn’t been coming to work, close to 3days I asked the receptionist to book an appointment and I was told she traveled for a conference with her Dad and she has no idea when she will return.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 25
“Determination of a man knows no bounds”


But I never stopped frequenting the company, until one sunny Saturday afternoon I saw her pulling out of her mansion in another car I guess she has so many, so I shouldn’t expect to see her in only one car.

I followed her until she pulled up at a restaurant with a guy leading the way in Instantly my mood changed, jealousy swept over my feelings, then I remembered the same feelings that made me loose her besides that guy is too young to be her “something” I encouraged myself.

I walked in after them, they got their order and was about to eat When I pulled another chair beside Babs.

Babs: What the hell?

Me: Before you say anything, please hear me out, we are in a public place.

Babs: Oh really, so I should keep quiet when you are stalking me? Or you came here to finish what you have started.

I heard from my friends you might come, I know how smart you are, no matter how far I hide you will always find your way to hurt me again. She said a lot of hurtful things and I just kept quiet, listened and the guy with her was just staring at me.

Me: Babs am not here to hurt you please, I instantly knelt down to the amazement and stares of on lookers.

I sat on the floor weeping like a baby, She just grabbed her bag and pulled the young guy and they left the restaurant after leaving some money on the table.

I quickly runned after her, but she drove so fast away.

I told myself, today wasn’t that bad, and I quickly ordered another of the food they were eating earlier. When I entered people were still staring at me like I killed someone.

I followed the order van to their gate where he delivered the food and left, I waited there to see any action but to no avail I went back to my hotel for a nap.


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[b]Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 26
“Two hearts apart, even far away beats for one another”

BARBARA’S DIARY



Mum:Babs what happened out there, I thought you guys went to eat out, but you came back early and the food has been delivered to you, it has a card too.

My best guess is you have a secret admirer.

Me: What card? Which secret admirer?

Mum I told you, I don’t want any man now. I tried telling my mum we lost our appetite and that we didn’t order for anything to be delivered,
I quickly snatched the card from her before she opens it.

Somehow am protecting this bastard from my father’s wrath, I have a good thing going on here with my family.

Am working on adopting two kids and my life will be back to normal again I don’t ever want to get myself in that web again, well if I want to get laid there are a lot of them out there, I could just hook up with one random guy, besides am not sure I want to get laid now The words in the card pierced me so hard.


Hi Love,

I can’t begin to say how sorry I am but I know, I was stupid, I didn’t deserve you at first but I deserve you now.Am a better man now, I know you have heard this before.

But believe me now when I say that is over.

What should I do to make up for this? We have come a long way, I lost all my friends because I messed up Nobody is willing to help get you back.

I don’t care if I have to face your parents This time am ready to go through anything for you.Tell me we can start afresh. Am sure by now you heard from your friends I was wrong all long.

Am sorry for breaking your heart and trust I miss you so much, your love, smile and the meals.

I know you want to start all over but kindly include me in your plans.Even for the silent treatments, so far as I can get to see you every day, am sure I can stand it for the sake of the love I have for you.

I will wait until you are ready.

Clyde,
Claytons Hotel room number 45A east end


Clyde has a way with his words, they always get me agreeing to every bit of his silly ideas but not this time
I tore the card apart whiles my mum stares on.

I ordered the food to be given to the gate man Surprisingly my mum didn’t ask much questions. I rushed to my room and cried a little, then I called up Bebe, malia and Livie they told me to do what I feel is right.

I told them I am sure I don’t want Clyde back anymore, they insisted I don’t know what am talking about.

It’s true, I still love the guy, he stirs up this fire in me am not able to explain, and he gives me the chills. I admit I want to be in his arms, even right at this minute.

But I wish he would have apologized when I was still with him. I would have taken him back, tore the divorce papers and give him a hot kiss to seal our marriage.

But now it’s too late, my parents are involved and there is no way, they are going to let me fall for Clyde again
I was in my room when my dad came to inquire what happened today with the delivery i got.

I explained to him, I got this guy asking me out which I wasn’t ready for and he understood saying so far as it’s not that heart breaker of a husband then he is fine This man will do anything for his only girl, I must better warn Clyde to go back to Nigeria.

I love him but I don’t want to destroy my family again because my dad might end up killing him and go to jail for it.

I thought of what to do until I remembered, i didn’t get the room number off the card, I sure do know the hotel But am not going to go there asking for a room number like some stalker I will stay put, until I meet him again, I do want to see him again Since the last encounter with the delivery.

I have not been able to get him out of my mind, I keep seeing his face everywhere now, at work, at home, my outings and everything.
He seemed to have an effect on me anytime he is around.

My soul and body yearns for him, it wasn’t like that back in Nigeria when we had the issue and I was so bent on getting him back,I think the difference now is, he has apologized and dare do that in a restaurant, the Clyde I know is a lot of things but he is too proud to kneel and apologize in a restaurant full of people.

He may kneel to propose or give me special gifts, but not to the extent of sitting on the floor crying. I thought for a while until sleep took over.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 27
“A kiss may or may not change that situation, give it out anyway”


The next day at the office I asked the receptionist if someone came looking for me which she responded No, I was a bit disappointed but I sure know he won’t give up.

I was worried something might have happened to him, but I quickly brushed it aside when my dad came in to enquire what I want for lunch, he then decided why not go out for lunch rather.

After a couple of hours, it was time for lunch.I decided we should drive in my car.

A few meters away from the office I saw a car following us, I recognized that to be Clyde’s car after his last stalking game, I got nervous.

I didn’t want him to meet my dad, because they certainly will be at each other’s throat. I quickly pulled up at my dad’s favorite restaurant and saw Clyde pulling a chair in some corner.

I was thankful for that As our order was yet to be brought, I excused my dad to visit the washroom.

I beckoned on Clyde to follow me, he did immediately. We met in the hall way, and he pushed me against the wall.

I suddenly became weak, his fragrance, his masculine body and that face. I was struggling to tell him to stand down whiles we talk.

He tried to touch and kiss me until the thought of him sleeping with all those girls came rushing back in.

I pushed him so hard away from me and told him to stay away from me. I warned seriously, when in the first place.

I was going to take his number and arrange a meet up. I quickly adjusted my dress and left him there.

I realized he didn’t follow me to the restaurant again. My best guess, he might have taken the other way out.

I was done eating and I asked for the receipt when the waitress handed me a piece of paper whiles whispering a certain gentleman asked I should give it to you Just then my dad asked if there was a problem, because he saw me looking so funny, I quickly replied, I think I run out of money dad.

He just laughed and asked I should get my expenses to the accountant when we get back, he will get my credit card sorted out.

We left and I tipped the waitress for giving me Clyde’s number. When we got to the office.

I picked up my phone and called his line. He instantly picked up upon hearing my yells.

Me: Can you stop stalking me for Christ’s sake.

Clyde: Babs, am sorry for coming down on you like that.

Can we meet over a drink?

Me: I didn’t call to talk to you.

Clyde: If you didn’t call to speak with me, Why then are you still on the call, i just quickly hang up.

He called severally but I didn’t answer. I quickly called Bebe and told her what has been going on.

She only laughs at my predicament and teases me when she can, to her she wished i met another Clyde. But whatever my decision is, she will always support me.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 28
“Whoever said love is for the strongest lied, everyone is capable of loving”


Later in the evening, I was with my family watching the late news and my phone kept ringing which I refused to pick up until my dad spoke up, is it that stalker again?

I realize you don’t want to pick up that call over an hour ago.

If he/she is still calling, they might be in trouble why don’t you pick up. I picked up and told him to call me in the next 1 hour, by then we might all be in our various rooms.

Exactly an hour, I took my bath, gave myself a real good massage and put on my best lingerie as if Clyde was coming over, then his call came in, there and then I realized I was fantasizing over him Clyde: Hi love, how was your day.

Me: fine, what do you want Clyde. Can’t you leave me alone? Haven’t you done enough harm to my heart? Why are you tempting me this way? Was it a crime to Love you this much Clyde: You still love me?

Me: No? What a stupid question to ask, I thought to myself.

Clyde: Please grant me just one meet up Me: Okay, tomorrow lunch time, Boyce restaurant.

Clyde: Thank you.

I quickly hang up before he could say something else I had trouble sleeping throughout the whole night, I can’t wait to meet him.

I went to work in my best attire, my best make up and heel, I was so happy modeling on my office corridor beaming with smiles which I haven’t done since I came back from Nigeria.

I remember I used to be so fun until I left London and came back, I kept watching the time until lunch time and I drove off to Boyce restaurant.

When I got there I saw Clyde waving from one corner, He is looking awesome today sine the last time I checked, I got there and he pulled a chair for me like he always does back then.
We were all looking weirdly at each other in silent until he broke it.

Clyde: I don’t know where to start from, but first of all Thank you so much for meeting me I want to officially apologize to you for my behavior in Nigeria Since then life without you has been painful, especially after I learnt the truth.

Me: And what exactly was the truth.

Clyde: Come on don’t make this hard already, I had my own share of embarrassment from your friends already, and do you know what I had to go through just looking for you?

Me: and how is that my problem or my concern. You wanted the music that way so you must as well dance to the tune.
You still haven’t told me the truth here you know.

Clyde: Okay fine, I expected that response from you anyway, I know you didn’t cheat on me, and you love me enough to do that to me I'm sorry I doubted you Love.

Me: who is your Love Clyde? You think it’s that easy to call me all sort of names and still sit here listening to you trying to push your way back in my heart.

You think am that kind of lady who wants to get broken two times.

Clyde: Babs I understand you, I know you don’t want me right now. You are still hurt, i'm not expecting you to take me back either, but I do hope you would consider it.

I was stupid, I knew what I was doing will hurt you, But I did it anyway because I thought I was giving you a piece of what you deserve for cheating not knowing i was harming my own self.

Me: Clyde you broke me completely, I had you what do I need in a man again. i just needed you to give me the benefit of the doubt. Was I not good enough in bed, what else do you want, tell me.

Clyde: You were perfect, forget whatever I said I was bitter and finding ways of getting you out of my life.

Me: And how do you expect me to do that, you seem to have everything figured out, tell me how to forgive you, now I saw myself tearing up whiles Clyde made to touch my hands.

The thought of those hands touching those ladies, I pulled out and told him to the face I don’t want any virus, I have had enough.

Me:Clyde get those hands off me, before you can touch me, get all the test in the world done i don’t want to contract anything, after sleeping with all those girls.

I stood up to leave when he held me again.

Clyde:I didn’t sleep with those girls, and please don’t leave yet.

Me: So you were camping them or they were rather sleeping with you, i am leaving and don’t try to stop me.

He didn’t and I left quietly to my office i became so sad on reaching home and everyone was wondering what was wrong with me. Two days and I haven’t gone to work nor left my room.

My parents tried but I just want an alone time.

The next day I was home and I got 3 hospital reports addressed in my name.
My mum handed me the reports and was wondering when and why I went to 3 different hospitals.

I was confused too, until I opened and realized Clyde took the tests i asked him to. He is clean, no STD’s but he is down on blood, I quickly called him.

Clyde: i'm guessing you got your report, what now Babs.

Me: Nothing Clyde, whatever you wish to achieve in sending this down to my house, Well it didn’t work, by the way you need some blood.
Have a good day. I hanged up, he called severally which I didn’t pick up.


To be continued

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Love Me Again

By: Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 29
“When a man takes the bold step its worth whatever comes out of it”


The next day was Saturday, I just woke up and struggling out of bed. When I heard my dad yelling and my mum telling him to take it easy i quickly rushed down in my morning coat.

Just to meet Clyde on his knees and my mum preventing my dad from flaring up again.I took another look at him on the floor and then my dad.
I rushed towards my dad.

Dad: Hold it there, young woman.

How long have you been seeing this woman beater? Answer me, is he the reason for your weird attitude lately.

You don’t eat, you don’t come out of your room neither do you go to work. Girl I won’t tolerate this again.

Listen to me carefully, go pack up your things, i'm sending you off to your aunts end, and you get the hell out of my house.

Clyde: Sir i'm sorry, Babs I just want to make things right I could hear my dad still yelling.

Me: Clyde you better go now, and don’t come back.

At least this time he listened to me and left.
Everyone went their separate ways. After 30minutes, I went to my dad’s room and met my mum still calming him down.

Me: We need to talk.

Dad: What about, the fact that you kept seeing that woman beater after all he did to you. And had the guts to let him in to my house?

Me: Dad I hope you haven’t forgotten this is my house too. And I have the right to bring in whoever I want to.

And how do you know what he did to me or didn’t do to me. Besides I didn’t even know Clyde would go that extent to step his foots in this house.

Yes I know he came down to London, yes I met him some few times, Yes he is the reason for my weird attitudes.

But I never said anything about Clyde beating me up, and confirming it was the reason we divorced. But Dad don’t you think am old enough to be wherever I want to.

For Christ’s sake am 28 years, i have lots of years ahead of me, to meet a lot of men, if I want to. To have fun, build a family if I ever will.

Can’t you just support me, like you always do when I achieve something? You even go an extra mile for me when i fail.

How is this one different, How is my failed marriage not your priority.That you have to embarrass your fellow man in that manner.

You can’t send me off to my aunt’s place like some kid unless you want me to rebel and leave again. This time around i might leave forever.

I was walking away when my mum spoke up and told him i was right. I waited to hear what he will say but he just stood up and went into their washroom.


To be continued

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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts

EPISODE 30
“Sweet words soften the heart, no matter how tough it may seem”



I went back to my room and realized i missed several calls from an unknown number. I decided to call back.

Me: Hello, I missed a call from this number.

Unknown number: This is Clayton Hotel as I mentioned earlier, do you know anyone here please.
I might not have heard her mentioning it earlier, I quickly gave him Clyde’s name and asked if she could pass me on she asked to hold on which I did.

Clyde: Babs is that you, I hope you are okay.

Me: What were you thinking Clyde? What came over you, at least give me a heads up. I hate you for this now.

Clyde: I'm sorry Babson, I was just thinking of making things right.

I didn’t care what your dad would do to me so far as he would forgive me for your sake, i'm willing to come to your house every now and then besides you were not exactly happy the last time we met.

Me: The more reason why, you should have stayed away from my house. You better don’t try it again.

Clyde: Babs i'm still in love with you, if that’s the only way to get you back I will.

Me: Get ready to loose me forever then.

Clyde: Does this mean you forgive me, Babs do you still love me.

i think I should come over more often, if two slaps from your dad can make you forgive me then I will want to take that every day, until you take me back.

Me: No to your first two questions but I hope you are okay, did you get your face looked at. Does it still hurt, if it does get some ice on it?

Clyde: Yes it hurts, it will need your touch, why don’t you come over.
Me: And where will I tell my dad am off to.
I suddenly found myself easing up and smiling at his silly comments.
'Get some ice on it, you should be fine. By the way what happened to your cell phone, you called on the hotel line.'

Clyde: I can’t tell, I think i might have dropped it accidentally in your house.

It was in my shirt pocket, i think when i got slapped and I fell on my knees it dropped Kindly check for me.
Me: Really, you did this on purpose so you can come back for it huh.

Clyde: Come on who would want to come back for that kind of slap?

Me: Meaning you have agreed not to come back here. Thank you and don’t think you are so smart, you think I would bring this phone over, i will send my driver to you later on.

Have a good day gentleman we hanged up, just then daddy came in.

Dad: Hi dear, how are you feeling.

Me: 'I'm fine dad.' He came to sit on the bed with me.

Dad: You know your well-being is my top most priority. Sometimes I still think you are my little girl and I will do anything to make you happy and protect you from any one that wants to harm you.

As you said earlier, you are old enough, so I won’t send you off to your aunt’s but don’t try threatening me of leaving forever, you don’t want to kill me right.

Me: Dad I love you, and I don’t want to do anything that will kill you. Whiles in Nigeria, there was no day I didn’t think about you guys. My husband always say I should give it time that you will come around.

So many times he tried calling the house for me but I stopped him.
Dad he is a good man, but he has some stuff i'm sure he needs to work through Whatever happened and we divorced, I don’t want to talk about it either.

Can you give him the chance to get to talk to you? He always wanted to.

Dad: Does that mean you have forgiven him and want to go off with him again.

Me: Dad i didn’t say that either, what i'm saying is Clyde has a lot of pride and for him to come in here after telling him you might kill him shows he regrets whatever he has done and wants to apologize.


Dad: He hasn’t done anything to me, to apologize for, he should be apologizing to you and he dare not step foot in this house again. Whatever you want to do I won’t stop you, Just tell him i don’t want to see his face ever again in this house.

And he dare not try taking you away to a no man’s land.

Me: He has apologized, i'm sure he wronged you when he married me without your blessings.
He wronged you when he broke Daddy’s little girl’s heart.

Give him the chance to make up for it. Please dad, do this for me and i promise not to marry him again.

Dad: Are you sure you are going to keep to your promise. Then I will think about it.

Come down for lunch, your mum is waiting i went downstairs with my dad, thinking if i just did the right thing

On getting there, my mum found Clyde’s phone and handed it over to me.


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Love Me Again

By:Loudest Thoughts
EPISODE 31
“Don’t hold yourself back whenever your heart wants something, take the risk”


After lunch I went back to my room and called him up at the hotel, told him my driver was bringing over the phone later that evening.

But then at 7pm, i saw myself at the Clayton Hotel.
How did I get there, I drove myself there.

I made the receptionist call about my driver, I was asked to go in.

I gently knocked on the door just for him to open up.
With his towel wrapped around his waist and that his masculine body was glaring at me.

What a temptation, as soon as he opened the door and saw me, he got shocked at the door.

He could not utter a word, at least he tried and the words were not coming out I finally spoke up.

Me: Won’t you let me in or I should go.

Clyde: Come in, my bad. By the way what happened to your driver?

Me: He went home early.

Clyde: Kindly sit on the bed.

Me: I prefer the couch, thanks and you look confused. Are you going somewhere?


Well I have no plans of staying for long, i keep stealing glances while he changes in front of me.
I could just imagine the bare chest, all over me.

I love hairy men, I wouldn’t know what I would have done if he weren’t hairy.
I kept fantasizing over his hairy chest until he spoke up.

Clyde: Kind of, I wasn’t expecting you that’s all, You can stay as long as you want to.

Me: By the way check if this thing still works I handed him the phone.

Clyde: Thank you for bringing this, What should I offer you, I have everything.

Me: Nothing am fine and should be on my way before my dad starts looking for me.

Clyde: Did you tell him you were coming here.

Me: No, am old enough to take my own decisions.

Clyde: Does that mean you aren’t going away from here.

Me: No, just then his phone rang.

Clyde: Can we cancel? Yes I know, I will pay the extra, you just save it. Later then.

Me: I can tell whoever it was, wasn’t happy you cancelled.
You can go, I just came to drop the phone, and it’s working perfectly, I should be on my way now.

Clyde: Are you sure you want to go?

Me: I stood up headed towards the door when he pulled me towards his face.

Held my face up, stared for a few seconds, as if he was looking for some answers.
He searched my eyes for another seconds, and he started kissing me for like a minute and pulled away panting.

Me: Sorry I have to go, I thought him pulling away means i have to get going.

I rushed out of there, as if I just saw a ghost I walked straight to where my car was parked, I heard Clyde calling me but I ignored and drove away.
I went straight home and to bed, my mind hovering and crowded with what just happened.

I kept asking myself what just happened repeatedly.

Clyde didn’t stop calling, I had to turn my phone off I managed to get some sleep, not after fantasizing about the kiss one more time.
I think I love it, it made me feel something different I drifted off to sleep.

To be continued

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