This is a long story.

It all started last Year after my dad's burial.

I left my younger brother in the village and returned to Abuja wia I was based. He was busy processing burial Documents and so he had to stay back.
He is not the first son but he is the next of Kin.

What my complicated family looks like


we are 4 children, 3 from my mum of which I'm d eldest, then a half sis that senoirs me.
Dad and mum were separated before her death in 2003 and he remarried before she died.
My current step mum had no child with him till he died.
My immediate younger bro had a fallout with step mum and left home in 2005 (he was 14) and No one heard from him again till dad died.
So dad made the last his next of kin.

While Emmanuel was processing Dad's burial Documents in Akwa-Ibom, I miraculously connected with Ezekiel the first son who told me all that happened and how he went abroad tru the desert and was deported. He had had been in Lag all along but too ashamed to return home after 10 years with nothing.
I immdiately connected him with Emma who was very happy to see him. I told them to work together on the Docs and after which they could come to me in Abuja and get settled.

4days together they wia both fine n happy to see each other and then the reunion turned sour.
They became cat and dogs and Would always call me on phone to settle issues between them.
Days later, Emma left for a church vigil and about the 3rd day, I got a call and the caller said my brother Emma was now mad. I called Ezekiel to go tio the supposed church wia he was n pick and make their way to Abuja with the next bus.

When I saw Emma, I cried, he looked all bones and ribs, eyes sulken and he was like a helpless shadow.
Emma would not sleep at night,he won't eat, he was restless, he would carry his bag and pace all day, roam all day and sometimes he would take a corner in the house and be crying and he would say things like " they want to kill me, they are sucking my blood, they want to use me for rituals. I was the most confused person on earth. I entered a fasting and praying mode.

Meanwhile, Emma n Ezekiel wia still cat and dogs, I got back home to find Ezekiel bleeding on his head. Emma attacked him with a padlock as he tried to restrain him from going out. I knew there that both brothers can't stay together.
My reunion with Ezekiel was sweet n sour.

2 weeks in Abuja with both brothers and my office approved my long pending transfer back to Lagos.
Time to separate both brothers as I thought.
Ezekiel said he doesn't want to go back to school and and wants to go back abroad, I was able to convince him to calm down and learn a skill which he agreed so I enrolled him in a Hair dressing and I and Emma left for Lag.

Emma's condition worsened, He would roam the Estate all day and sometimes I would return from work n not find him at home.
Then my maternal uncle whom we had not been in touch with heard about Emma and quickly sent for him.
This was about 4 months after the drama started.
My uncle was so angry I did not tell them all of it, accused me of not taking care of my brothers and said infact Emma would stay with him going forward and I should check Emma out in 3 months time.
I was very releived to find help.

1 week in PHC with my uncle and all was smoth, then my uncle called and said I shud send funds he wanted to take Emma for check up and I did.
A few days after my uncle began to complain that he can't cope, Emma was suddenly too rude and he can't bear it again. He said Emma was my cross to bear and I shud send him fare to return to me.
So 2 weeks after, Emma came back to me In Lag.
He was a lot more better, had gained good weight, His communication flow was a lot better but still distorted.

As the days went by, Emma began to talk less, he began to be very slow at accomplishing things, he could wash plates for hours. Then he began to take odd psoitions. He could stand for 2 hours and not move and all that. Then he would wee on himself.

I quickly sought d help of a traditional herb seller who gave me some herbs to cook for him and I did.
Day 3 on the herb n he began this deep sleep episodes. He would sleep for hours all night, wake up and eat in d morning n go back to sleep all day.
Try to wake him and he won't even move.
This continued for days coupled with the bet wetting which was worse.
I decided to seek medical help.

The first hospital we visited referred us to Federal Neuro-psychiatric Hospital Yaba same night.

My experience at Federal Neuro-psychiatric Hospital ,Yaba.


We got to Yaba at about 11pm, at this point he was all stiff and motionless, eyes open.
We were told that hospital card costs N4000 and I brought out my card to pay but to my surprise, I was told the hospital did not have POS.
The Doctor on call took his write up and that was it.
I was told we won't ve attended to as I didn't have cash to pay.
We were sent back home same night at about 12a.m.
My Brother survived the night and the next day we went back to the hospital.

I made all necessary pamemts, bought all materials as was required of me and he was placed on 3days observation in the Emergency unit and was on Drip as he wasn't eating.

By this time, the doctors diagnosed him and said hr was having catatonic schizophrenia plus seizures.
He would wake up briefly, mumble somee wordworldsds and go back to sleep.

After 72hrs, His time was up at the Emergency ward and I was instruscted to augment payment for his transfer to the main ward which I did.
At this time, I had spent at least a N100,000.
Admission fee for 1 month was 50,000 besides other expenses.

After 1 night in the main ward which was day 4, I was told that he needed specialist care and dey would have to refer us to military hospital as they did not have full capacity to handle his case. At this point I had become financially drained, I had spent everything, wia would I start from?.

I was advised to apply for refund so that Part of the 50k I paid for admission would be returned. I told the Doctors and Nurses that I couldnt afford new medical bills as I spent all but the referral note had been given and we had to go. I further asked on what grounds was my Brother beeb reffered and they said he is unconcious and we can't manage him in that state. They said we are nit discharging him yet and once he is stable bring him back. He was given some meds and I took him home.

About 1 week on the meds, he began to groan, he would groan all night holding his stomach n even throw up. He started rejecting his drugs nd even food.
I spoke with a physician and he prescribed ulcer meds and after 2 days on it, the stomach pain stopped.
On the 3rd day he became aggressive n violent n tried to attack me.
I quickly called for help n he was restrained and I took him back to the hospital. By this time he was no longer having the seizures or being unconcious.


Our second time in Yaba was a lot more dramatic, First the Doctors and Nurses said I had come to the hospital about 2 days back to return his bedsheets nd I equally told them my brother was dead.
I told them it was a mix up and wasn't me.

After a lot of consideration, they put him back in the Emergency ward and on day 3, I was with hope that he would be admitted to the main ward but to my surprise, My Brother was discharged and asked to be coming for clinic from home.

I quickly aired my fears that I'm not comfortable with the plan and Would want him to stay back some more but I was dismissed.
The consultant in charge of the main ward insisted that he had reffered and it was final. He would only take my Brother back if I produced an MRI test result.

I work Monday to Saturday, How will I monitor his progress?How will I convince him to take hims drugs?.
the hospital would hear none of that and it was the final decision.

We have been home for 4 days now. He has beeb doing well but twice he has asked for beer and he went out to get beer.
Yesterday I got back from work and everywia was smelling of cigarette smoke. He refused to talk to me.
This morning I tried to engage him in a subtle discussion why he needs to avoid those things so he can recover fully and my Brother attacked me again. He slapped me over and over.

At this point, I don't know wat do do, I had to run out of the house to a friends room, .I'm stuck here and can't go to work.
I have cried my eyes out, our rent just expired and I just paid for a new place. Where do I start from?, Yaba has dismissed him and I can't afford an MRI.
I Don't know wat to do, I have fought so hard and so long and I feel like running away.

Somebody help me I am loosing my mind!!!!.


Mods, Lalasticlala, dominique, Mind44 please help me move to front page.
Help a sister please my heart is breaking

will be BACK

This ur brother get Wahala oo. Am just speechless. May God show u the way bro. U re such a good brother. But ur brother is not in the state to know DAT for u. But u should understand DAT ur brother is under some kind of spiritual attack
... Only prayer is the solutions. May God direct direct u to who will help u out. Stay bless .

I am sorry about what you are going through. I am not sure what to tell you but ensure that he continues to take his medication. Don't allow him smoke and take all those things that are detrimental to his health. Rather I think you should try distracting him and also be firm if he insists on taking them.

In what situation does he usually get aggressive?

You also have to understand that when someone has schizophrenia, it affects their ability to process and think rationally.

Can you a mental health nurse to check on him regularly?

Mofpearl:
I am sorry about what you are going through. I am not sure what t tell you but ensure that he continues to take his medication. Don't allow him smoke and take all those things that are detrimental to his health. Rather I think you should try distracting him and also be firm if he insists on taking them.

In what situation does he usually get aggressive?

You have to understand that when someone has schizophrenia, it affects their ability to process and think rationally. M

I was really subtle and calmly talking to him when suddenly he got up and started hitting me. I am so scared at this point, what is he stabs me of hits me with something?. I feel like running away at this point. This is just too much for me

Ay04z:
This ur brother get Wahala oo. Am just speechless. May God show u the way bro. U re such a good brother. But ur brother is not in the state to know DAT for u. But u should understand DAT ur brother is under some kind of spiritual attack
... Only prayer is the solutions. May God direct direct u to who will help u out. Stay bless .

I'm a female.
I have prayed, fasted etc.

TiredOfFighting:



I was really subtle and calmly talking to him when suddenly he got up and started hitting me. I am so scared at this point, what is he stabs me of hits me with something?. I feel like running away at this point. This is just too much for me

You have every reason to be scared. I understand that you are feeling overwhelmed at this point and this is understandable. It's never easy caring for a family member with any type of illness.How have you been coping so far? What support system do you have right now? Do you know any groups who may be able to provide social support?
If you are starting to feel you can't handle it where can you get help? Taking care of your brother is important but taking care of yourself is just as important as well.
I think the hospital could have also done some teaching on how to interact with him and behaviors to expect with schizophrenia. You can also try reading on schizophrenia and caring for a family member with one.

Is it possible to get a nurse check on him regularly?

Maybe you could go back to the hospital and explain your situation. Perhaps they can refer you to where to get help (for both you and your brother) or arrange for someone who can check on him regularly.

TiredOfFighting:


I'm a female.
I have prayed, fasted etc.

okay. God be with u.

TiredOfFighting:



I was really subtle and calmly talking to him when suddenly he got up and started hitting me. I am so scared at this point, what is he stabs me of hits me with something?. I feel like running away at this point. This is just too much for me

How was he acting before that?

Was he pacing around?

Did he seem distressed?

Was he paying attention to what you were saying or he seemed to be in another world.

Do you live alone with him? *I think you will need someone else to stay with him. In the meantime, if you are talking to him and you think he'll get aggressive, keep your distance.

I feel your pain my dear sis.

I think his case is spiritual. Take him to a powerful man of God for deliverance.

Meanwhile, be very careful as you live with him and talk to him against what he does.....so he doesn't hurt you or even kill you(God forbids)

Get a medical caregiver for him.

Your story is touchy
Wish I could help

Some safety tips that I can think of atm.

Always ensure he doesn't have acess to sharp objects- knives, forks, nails etc, harmful materials *like a rope even* or anything that he can use to harm himself (when you are away) or anyone around him. Maybe you need to lock the cabnets where knives etc are stored. You can even change to using plastic spoons.

Never let him get between you and the door. If you are talking to him ensure the door is always opened incase of anything.

His room shouldn't have a lot of things in it. Just a bed and where he needs to put his clothes. Check his wordrobe, under the bed and the pillow everyday.
.......................................

Show interest in whatever he talks about. This is the only way you can understand things from his prospective. For example, if he says someone is trying to kill him. Ask him about the reasons he says that. Ask him about the description of the person *if he is seeing somebody*. Ask if the person is holding a a knife, gun or anything. This will allow you gauge your interaction with him. If you know that he is seeing someone with a gun when you are talking to him, you will be able to keep that in mind because he may do something to protect himself. For example, he can push you to run away if the person he sees is getting close. This is just an example. You can always try assuring him that he is safe and no one can hurt him at home. If he doesn't listen and starts to yell or throw objects, please leave and get help.
................................................
Regarding taking the medication- try to understand why he doesn't want to take them.
-Is it because of the side effect
-Is it because he doesn't feel like he needs them. Try explaining it in terms like taking this medication will make you think clearly or taking the medication reduces the chances of hearing or seeing X again. If you have previously tried explaining to him that he needs the medication and it doesn't work then maybe lie to him that the medication is to make him sleep better. Don't let him have access to the medication *this is also for safety reasons, so he doesn't overdose on it.
-Make a schedule like for example every 6am you wake him up to take it until he gets used to it.

Lastly sorry if I overwhelmed you. It was not my intention. Regardless the situation You come first and I know its hard right now but it does get better

Ay04z:
This ur brother get Wahala oo. Am just speechless. May God show u the way bro. U re such a good brother. But ur brother is not in the state to know DAT for u. But u should understand DAT ur brother is under some kind of spiritual attack
... Only prayer is the solutions. May God direct direct u to who will help u out. Stay bless .

I pity some people, a medical condition is what you are calling spiritual attack.....superstition has really blocked some people's brain

TiredOfFighting:
This is a long story.

It all started last Year after my dad's burial.

I left my younger brother in the village and returned to Abuja wia I was based. He was busy processing burial Documents and so he had to stay back.
He is not the first son but he is the next of Kin.

What my complicated family looks like


we are 4 children, 3 from my mum of which I'm d eldest, then a half sis that senoirs me.
Dad and mum were separated before her death in 2003 and he remarried before she died.
My current step mum had no child with him till he died.
My immediate younger bro had a fallout with step mum and left home in 2005 (he was 14) and No one heard from him again till dad died.
So dad made the last his next of kin.

While Emmanuel was processing Dad's burial Documents in Akwa-Ibom, I miraculously connected with Ezekiel the first son who told me all that happened and how he went abroad tru the desert and was deported. He had had been in Lag all along but too ashamed to return home after 10 years with nothing.
I immdiately connected him with Emma who was very happy to see him. I told them to work together on the Docs and after which they could come to me in Abuja and get settled.

4days together they wia both fine n happy to see each other and then the reunion turned sour.
They became cat and dogs and Would always call me on phone to settle issues between them.
Days later, Emma left for a church vigil and about the 3rd day, I got a call and the caller said my brother Emma was now mad. I called Ezekiel to go tio the supposed church wia he was n pick and make their way to Abuja with the next bus.

When I saw Emma, I cried, he looked all bones and ribs, eyes sulken and he was like a helpless shadow.
Emma would not sleep at night,he won't eat, he was restless, he would carry his bag and pace all day, roam all day and sometimes he would take a corner in the house and be crying and he would say things like " they want to kill me, they are sucking my blood, they want to use me for rituals. I was the most confused person on earth. I entered a fasting and praying mode.

Meanwhile, Emma n Ezekiel wia still cat and dogs, I got back home to find Ezekiel bleeding on his head. Emma attacked him with a padlock as he tried to restrain him from going out. I knew there that both brothers can't stay together.
My reunion with Ezekiel was sweet n sour.

2 weeks in Abuja with both brothers and my office approved my long pending transfer back to Lagos.
Time to separate both brothers as I thought.
Ezekiel said he doesn't want to go back to school and and wants to go back abroad, I was able to convince him to calm down and learn a skill which he agreed so I enrolled him in a Hair dressing and I and Emma left for Lag.

Emma's condition worsened, He would roam the Estate all day and sometimes I would return from work n not find him at home.
Then my maternal uncle whom we had not been in touch with heard about Emma and quickly sent for him.
This was about 4 months after the drama started.
My uncle was so angry I did not tell them all of it, accused me of not taking care of my brothers and said infact Emma would stay with him going forward and I should check Emma out in 3 months time.
I was very releived to find help.

1 week in PHC with my uncle and all was smoth, then my uncle called and said I shud send funds he wanted to take Emma for check up and I did.
A few days after my uncle began to complain that he can't cope, Emma was suddenly too rude and he can't bear it again. He said Emma was my cross to bear and I shud send him fare to return to me.
So 2 weeks after, Emma came back to me In Lag.
He was a lot more better, had gained good weight, His communication flow was a lot better but still distorted.

As the days went by, Emma began to talk less, he began to be very slow at accomplishing things, he could wash plates for hours. Then he began to take odd psoitions. He could stand for 2 hours and not move and all that. Then he would wee on himself.

I quickly sought d help of a traditional herb seller who gave me some herbs to cook for him and I did.
Day 3 on the herb n he began this deep sleep episodes. He would sleep for hours all night, wake up and eat in d morning n go back to sleep all day.
Try to wake him and he won't even move.
This continued for days coupled with the bet wetting which was worse.
I decided to seek medical help.

The first hospital we visited referred us to Federal Neuro-psychiatric Hospital Yaba same night.

My experience at Federal Neuro-psychiatric Hospital ,Yaba.


We got to Yaba at about 11pm, at this point he was all stiff and motionless, eyes open.
We were told that hospital card costs N4000 and I brought out my card to pay but to my surprise, I was told the hospital did not have POS.
The Doctor on call took his write up and that was it.
I was told we won't ve attended to as I didn't have cash to pay.
We were sent back home same night at about 12a.m.
My Brother survived the night and the next day we went back to the hospital.

I made all necessary pamemts, bought all materials as was required of me and he was placed on 3days observation in the Emergency unit and was on Drip as he wasn't eating.

By this time, the doctors diagnosed him and said hr was having catatonic schizophrenia plus seizures.
He would wake up briefly, mumble somee wordworldsds and go back to sleep.

After 72hrs, His time was up at the Emergency ward and I was instruscted to augment payment for his transfer to the main ward which I did.
At this time, I had spent at least a N100,000.
Admission fee for 1 month was 50,000 besides other expenses.

After 1 night in the main ward which was day 4, I was told that he needed specialist care and dey would have to refer us to military hospital as they did not have full capacity to handle his case. At this point I had become financially drained, I had spent everything, wia would I start from?.

I was advised to apply for refund so that Part of the 50k I paid for admission would be returned. I told the Doctors and Nurses that I couldnt afford new medical bills as I spent all but the referral note had been given and we had to go. I further asked on what grounds was my Brother beeb reffered and they said he is unconcious and we can't manage him in that state. They said we are nit discharging him yet and once he is stable bring him back. He was given some meds and I took him home.

About 1 week on the meds, he began to groan, he would groan all night holding his stomach n even throw up. He started rejecting his drugs nd even food.
I spoke with a physician and he prescribed ulcer meds and after 2 days on it, the stomach pain stopped.
On the 3rd day he became aggressive n violent n tried to attack me.
I quickly called for help n he was restrained and I took him back to the hospital. By this time he was no longer having the seizures or being unconcious.


Our second time in Yaba was a lot more dramatic, First the Doctors and Nurses said I had come to the hospital about 2 days back to return his bedsheets nd I equally told them my brother was dead.
I told them it was a mix up and wasn't me.

After a lot of consideration, they put him back in the Emergency ward and on day 3, I was with hope that he would be admitted to the main ward but to my surprise, My Brother was discharged and asked to be coming for clinic from home.

I quickly aired my fears that I'm not comfortable with the plan and Would want him to stay back some more but I was dismissed.
The consultant in charge of the main ward insisted that he had reffered and it was final. He would only take my Brother back if I produced an MRI test result.

I work Monday to Saturday, How will I monitor his progress?How will I convince him to take hims drugs?.
the hospital would hear none of that and it was the final decision.

We have been home for 4 days now. He has beeb doing well but twice he has asked for beer and he went out to get beer.
Yesterday I got back from work and everywia was smelling of cigarette smoke. He refused to talk to me.
This morning I tried to engage him in a subtle discussion why he needs to avoid those things so he can recover fully and my Brother attacked me again. He slapped me over and over.

At this point, I don't know wat do do, I had to run out of the house to a friends room, .I'm stuck here and can't go to work.
I have cried my eyes out, our rent just expired and I just paid for a new place. Where do I start from?, Yaba has dismissed him and I can't afford an MRI.
I Don't know wat to do, I have fought so hard and so long and I feel like running away.

Somebody help me I am loosing my mind!!!!.


Mods, Lalasticlala, dominique, Mind44 please help me move to front page.
Help a sister please my heart is breaking

Hello, sorry about the situation.

if you would prefer private mental healthcare you can reach me on 08034209301

TiredOfFighting:
This is a long story.

It all started last Year after my dad's burial.

I have a schizophrenic close relative. I'll be back in a few hours. You are not alone.

this is so painful.. just do your best