I do hear most complain ladies do give about how their boyfriends dump them after having sex or after many years of having sex with them.
Before I continue, I know you must be asking yourself that is Telemony now supporting sex before marriage. Whether I support it or not, it is an act that will continue to exist till the second coming of Christ but we can at least reduce it.
Now let me continue.
I do discuss sex issues a lot with my female friends and those that do seek advice from me online through my page and that's because they trust me.
See I have this friend, all of a sudden she just develop hatred for guys that I can feel it through the way she interact with me. Someone that is nice and jovial before now becoming aggressive and harsh towards guys including me her friend. I knew something must be wrong somewhere.
We were talking like that one day and I use the opportunity to enter her slowly. Lo and behold, she opened up that her boyfriend of 3years broke up with her and the most annoying part was that he was not remorseful after reminding him of all the sex they had together. He doesn't even care. I calm her down and pet her. Now she made mention of one thing which is the point I grab. She said Telemu, I can't believe he will dump me like that after many sex with him and he is the type that will bang someone anyhow he wants. Then I know it is time to discuss about sex with her but I must be mindful of my words too so as not to spoil everything.
Like you know that women generally love sweet words, I started with that to make her feel comfortable with me. After that, I said I cant blame you for having sex with him because the deed has already been done. You had the sex with him just because you love and trust him and you don't want to lose him. She said that's why I like you among my male friends, you understand ladies so much and why they do some things. With that her statement, I know I have entered her already and it is time to fire.
My first question was how many times did you have sex with him ? She cant remember which means it is many.
Then my next question was where did the first sex happened ? She said his house. I knew we are getting somewhere.
Then my third and the most important question was did you collect money after the act ? She said yes but it was just transport money. Then I asked how much, she said #1000. Then I said from your place to his place is just #50 and to and fro will be #100 like that but the guy gave you #1000. She said he told her to use the money for Tfare ni. Then I told her the truth that the guy didn't give you Tfare but rather the money for the work you did. She was surprised.
My questions didn't end there. I asked again that did he normally give you money after each sex and do you normally collect it ? She said yes to both. Then I said you are a prostitute to him and he can never appreciate or respect you. She said no, he do respect me a lot. Then I said that's because he is still enjoying your honey pot then. Didn't he leave when he is done ?
Do you now see the reason why he is not remorseful or care about you when you remind him of the sex you both do have. He sees you as a prostitute he do pay every time after the sex, so why should he care after paying for your service ? Then her eyes were opened after we discuss at length.
A lot of ladies are guilty of this act too. I know no matter what, pre-marital sex cant be erased totally. But have you wonder why some people will engage in pre-marital sex but still end up marrying each other with their love still strong and why some will engage in the same act but will cut short the life span of their love. A lot of reasons are responsible for this and part of it is what you do as a lady before and after the sex and the condition that surrounds the sex.
Are you the type that demand for something from your guy either money or gift before the sex or you are the type that accept the money he do give you after the sex. If you are doing any of these, the guy will see you as a prostitute and dump you when he is through with you.
Even if at all you gonna collect any money from him, don't let it be immediately after the sex or that same day or even a week after the sex. If he offers the money, smile and tell him do you think I did this because of money. Even he says it's for your transport, let him know you come with your Tfare. Tell him you did it because you love him and you miss him too. No guy will hear that and still see you as a prostitute or plans to dump you, his conscience will never let him rest.
I don't know if I'm talking to someone here.
Now you know how to handle a situation like this and if you've already started it, their is still time for you to change and also change his mentality about you.
I still have a lot of things to talk about on this kind of sex but let me stop here but I will definitely continue next time.
Even though the best is to avoid pre-marital sex but if you are the type that cant abstain for long as a lady, stop using the act as a financial gain if you still want to your man to respect and adore you.

Woow! U nailed it. You must be a Carpenter

this op schooled in France...naija girls like money pass anything stop gibbering

TreasuredLeidy:
Woow! U nailed it. You must be a Carpenter

Can u summarize please

Nice point...but some guys will still dump a sassy áss Lady regardless.

Somborry will have a bad day reading this piece of truth.

Especially, the slay queens, whose only life goal is to count just how many D*cks they've gauged, and who only get their bragging right based on how many "payments" they get from warming "Big boys" beds.

They said a girl is raised to be taken care of, as if she's too weak and limited to make things happen for herself. And those that are "supposedly" making things happen for themselves by taking rounds from BIG MEN's beds are nonetheless PARASITIC.

Only the mind can help, else, saying the truth turns you to their enemy INSTANTA.

The only kind of women I find attractive are those who develop themselves in character and personality, compete fairly with men in work or career spheres without sleeping their ways to favours, get educated enough to stand tall and create realistic plans for their lives and future.

That is what I call SEXINESS, that is what attracts me to any woman.

Firstly I think ladies should stop feeling that having sex with a guy is doing him a favor. Sex is consensual and is enjoyed by BOTH people involved. Secondly the term 'dumped ' is only appropriate if both have made plans, invested together in their future ( pls note sex is not an investment), sacrificed for each other (sex might be a sacrifice but it is same for the man as it is for the woman) , also how many women who Play victim can beat their chests that they have been 100% faithful during the relationship . Guys get dumped after spending lots of money on girls and they expect us to just accept it and move on.... I suggest they do same. Lastly sex has become cheap and has lost its value so any woman thinking that once she sleeps with a guy, he should be hooked for life is on a long thing. Try offering something that is not easy to come by and men will beg you but if it's sex, be ready for many sad times.

Erm what if she didn't demand for the money? is she supposed to refuse the money?

TreasuredLeidy:
Woow! U nailed it. You must be a Carpenter

funny oo

I agree with iamkashybaby..No boyfriend no wahala..

You reject the transport fare,cook,wash,clean give him all the acrobatic styles during sex, if he's not in love with you and or the grace of God is not with you or you are not lucky you'll still get dumped for a bitch*...there's no handbook for relationships

IamKashyBaby:


Ooh Thank You Jezzus for keeping me away from these men who always thought got dem big d**** ...

For they dont know how to treasure a real woman...

#TeamSingleLadies
#TeamNeverBeenKissedNeverBeenTouched
#TeamWaitingForMrRight

I doubt these your claims about being a virgin though

When you come naija to write this type of story I know say you serious

This is not entirely true
I give my gf tfare without having sex with her sometimes
It all depends on individual but I suggest ladies be very careful with a guy that always demand for sex everytime you go visiting

YOLO

Lol so true.

forreelinc:


Can u summarize please

If you are a Lady, don't collect money from ur boyfriend immediately after sex else u will be tagged prostitute

IamKashyBaby:


Ooh Thank You Jezzus for keeping me away from these men who always thought got dem big d**** ...

For they dont know how to treasure a real woman...

#TeamSingleLadies
#TeamNeverBeenKissedNeverBeenTouched
#TeamWaitingForMrRight

You didn't add #TeamLesbian!

I had two girls like that, on different occasions that's after the whole fun they will refuse my 1k or sometimes 5h tfare claiming they r not prostitute,at first I was wowed and all, but ehn, the kind of money they ask at the end of the month pass my salary o...i go just hear billing ehn and my whole system go shut down....later I cm buy piggy bank so anytime she comes, the money I ought to give her will be put in the piggy, so when billing comes na piggy they rescues me but the piggy money is never enough..

TreasuredLeidy:

If you are a Lady, don't collect money from ur boyfriend immediately after sex else u will be tagged prostitute

So if I give a lady money after sex it means negative,chai the mentality of ladies have totaly change...

Martin0:


So if I give a lady money after sex it means negative,chai the mentality of ladies have totaly change...

That's the summary of the post. Direct your question to the op

IamKashyBaby:


Ooh Thank You Jezzus for keeping me away from these men who always thought got dem big d**** ...

For they dont know how to treasure a real woman...

#TeamSingleLadies
#TeamNeverBeenKissedNeverBeenTouched
#TeamWaitingForMrRight

hahahaha..mr right doesn't exist o..you have drag him from left to right

I have this girl...we on friendzone and she open up to me about her relationship....she is the kind that go to a guy house without tfare and to worst it hungry and visit d so called bf and when coming back she gat some naira notes on her, after some time she go beg the guy to come spend weekend na so guy go give excuse. She is a working class but careless abt her so called date. She keep telling me how she get a new date like every month without working things out with the present one. when I ask about the last guy...she will simply reply, forget that guy.....honestly sex has little or no value in relationship is just heat of the moment.... Lemme ask this....is sex worth remembering after the act?NO. It only leads to plans for another round. So why do ladies behaves as if sex is a life insurance or oath that will make dem never to move forward.....perhaps my d*ck is not stuck in your pot. When you get dump believe u aren't doing well as a gf....I know some guys are rude but don't you try to understand your guy b4 dating him? Be safe.....play wise.....just know giver's never lack.....is better to give than receive.....be a cheerful giver when it comes to sex*

TreasuredLeidy:

That's the summary of the post. Direct your question to the op

na ur comment move me..

Giving a lady money after sex does mean anything to me,it the reaction that follows it..

TreasuredLeidy:
That's the summary of the post. Direct your question to the op

Ok what if I don't give her money and she continuously coming back for more..

Remain a virgin and you won't be writing all these stories that touch

OP, I read your post and I see nothing wrong in what she did. We don't always have to read too much meaning to things, the guy got uninterested...it has nothing to do with the tfare he gives her.

She should move on.

On girls seeing sex as a favour to guys...as long as society keeps slutshaming women for 'consensual' sex, some women will stick to the mentality that they are the one losing out.

Op God bless you
All the same some broke guys will misquote what you post
You're right a bf should give his gf money but not immediately after sex!! But girls won't listen they will be like he cant be banging me for free naaa

TreasuredLeidy:

If you are a Lady, don't collect money from ur boyfriend immediately after sex else u will be tagged prostitute

really? I want to take u home to meet my mom

TreasuredLeidy:
Woow! U nailed it. You must be a Carpenter

Hahhhhaahah