Bolu have been living in my bq for two years. She is the younger sister of my friend back in our university days. Her brother begged me to give her a room in my bq when she secured a small job at Akure in 2015. A very pleasant lady but she has a major flaw which is laziness. She will come around to us in the main building and eat supper most of the time. Sometimes during weekend she will eat breakfast, lunch and supper in my apartment. She is now 29. She told us that sometimes she will sleep without eating if she missed dinner in my place and cannot find prepared food to buy since we live in government quarters that's a bit far from Akure main City. My wife had to use style to ask her why at a time. She told her plainly that one thing she hate most in her life is cooking. She told my wife that any man that will marry her must be ready to prepare his meals. In 2016, her brother came around and ask her openly in my presence if she has stopped starving herself because of " her laziness" to which she responded that she owns herself and she's not complaining. She's a very lovely and beautiful lady though. The issue now is that a junior colleague of mine who is very close to my family (in fact I see him as a friend) has been dating her since late 2016. He started complaining about her attitude to cooking since June this year and seriously needed my advise. I couldn't tell him to stop or go ahead now, I wouldn't want to contribute to whether he married her or not so that he won't see me as the person who urged him on later. Please, what kind of advise should I give to this friend in need?

I dey come

if he's ready to prepare his own meals, no problem

You are still asking?. A wife that cannot cook is that one a wife

Hmmmm...lemme goan b coming

It's a red flag and he's already aware of what he's getting into. Since she's lazy to cook as a single lady, when she's married with kids, meaning more responsibility, how will she handle that?. If he should get a cook, cooks do go on away sometime and render their employers helpless. I think this laziness goes beyond cooking. She may not know how to keep a home neat or do small laundry for her husband and kids even if she's got a washing machine.

Tell him to do what he knows is best 'cause he may take your advise if he doesn't mind her laziness.

a relationship is not an evangelical mission designed to change people, if you don't like his/her character. MOVE ON

Tell him.. If he likes.. He can stay. If he can't cope he should leave.. The way to a man's heart is good food and sex..with other necessity

It isn't about what you'll advise your friend, but what your friend can tolerate in the long run. He is already complaining _ I foresee more complains. I'll suggest he leaves her and go get a wife that can cook.
Does she hate it or can't do it at all? Some people are still open to learning and can pick up basic cooking skills with time.

Home management is a skill that both gender should possess, marriage is a partnership and except one or both are handicapped, the other should be able to come through where one is lacking.

After all said and done, it depends on the spouse and what they are tolerant of. I also hate washing and cleaning, it wouldn't have worked with some other man, but it works perfectly with mine. That's all that matters, not society's definition of a good wife (or mother).

Well she already said any man that will marry her must be prepared to make his own meals.Ask your friend if he's ready to do that?

She has already given him her warning that she won't be cooking for him. Up to him to take heed.

funny these kind of people exist. loneliness will become there best friend. STRANGE.

If cooking is just her problem, then It's not even a big issue to some people... A lot of men has sacrificed more than a cooking and cleaning lady...Some discovered during courtship their girl cannot have a child of her own and they agree on adoption...Some got partners that got one sickness or another and so many other sacrifices..It's all about human level of tolerant and maturity..

As our faces are different, so also our endurance level, accommodating level and Tolerance level.

He has been dating her for 6 months, if he doesn't want her the way she is, he can call the relationship off..do not add or subtract anything from your advice so that it will not look like u forced him on her or that you blocked her from her ideal husband..

The only regret will be marrying her to change her..

Why do people do this all the time? The girl was open enough to say she can't cook. The man heard her loud and clear when she said it and he understood. It is his life and his choice. Why is he pushing this major life changing choice unto his friend to help him make a decision? If he fears that you'll feel bad if he dumps the girl, please assuage those fears. You have to tell your colleague the truth and make him understand you won't judge or hold grudges. The girl has a big problem. If the problem was just lack of skills, then he could enrol her in a catering school to learn or employ a cook while she picks up. But in this case, she is LAZY! She hates to cook, knows it and isn't ready to learn!

Now if your friend isn't ready to do the cooking like she said, please, tell him to find his way. Frankly, if you like that your colleague who's turned a friend, this could be the best thing you'd do for him.

I believe you can talk to her, see her as your sister advise her on possible ways to go about it. In marriage, you don't do only what pleases you

fatymore:
Tell him.. If he likes.. He can stay. If he can't cope he should leave.. The way to a man's heart is good food and sex..with other necessity

u make sense

If he ever tries it, he will regret his actions forever.

No man on earth can tolerate or cope with a lazy wife.

Food is the only thing a man cannot do without. Give me food, and keep your love and se x.

Depends on the person in question.
Some will happily cook their own meals or hire a chef.
Everyone has what's important to them.
Lazy women and men get married everyday
The fact that someone doesn't cook isn't a marker for laziness,some just do not like.to cook.
Its not by force.
If you like food please marry your fellow food lover to avoid stories that touch