I was going to school this morning when I spotted fine girl from a distance. Poets no dey carry last na. I approached.

Me: Hi, good morning. I have been staring at you for quite a while now. Please don't mind my saying you are an excellent and distinctive work of God. Every strand of hair on your head glows like polished diamond. Your skin radiates like a blushing sun and your shape is a testimony that the earth is round.

(Fine girl just dey look like someone in haste but I no mind, I continued...)

I'm Micheal by name and I'm addicted to being friend with angels like you. Would you please give me your contact at least because I see you are in haste.

(Fine girl's phone rang and she picked...)
Fine girl (to the caller): Hello dear. I'll be there in a jiffy. Just wait a bit more. Love you dear.

Na so fine girl flagged down a cab, entered and looked at me with one horror face.

It's opposite a bank and the people at the ATM stand were just looking at me. Some of them laughing. I just carry my leg waka, make I go bathe again for house.

This world is really a wicked place to be.

©Micheal Ace

So after hyping and hyping both offline and online, I later sent my roommate to buy me Game of thrones season 1 while coming back from Bet9ja. I always felt like an alien anytime my friends talked about the film like it's a one-way ticket out of Nigeria. I bought the first season like I said, placed the disk on my laptop's DVD plate, and as I reached the scene where they were knacking, serious doggy-style knacking I mean, light went off. My system was actually a television in disguise. Once light goes, it switches off.

That was Saturday night. On Sunday morning, I woke and immediately took my bath, getting set for church. You don't do anything on a Sunday morning until you come back from church. You don't even eat. That was how I was raised. So upon getting to church, I sat behind my latest crush and new friend who happened to be the most beautiful and admired member. I just got the chance to speak with her the previous Sunday. She's always escorted by the rich and spiritual brothers in the church.

After service, I made my way to her and luckily, she agreed to stop by at my place before leaving for home. My house is just a stone throw from church. She entered my small boyish abode and sat on the bed. As courtesy demands, I bought her a cold soft drink and to add more to my hospitality, I switched on the laptop and the film continued playing. Lo and behold, fine girl was taken aback watching two full grown adults naked and teaching themselves the lessons of their lives.

Fine girl just carried her bag and left. She thought It was deliberate, like I really wanted to get her on. I couldn't stop her, my heart was broken and the last and first time she picked my call since the incidence, it was as if thunder fell on me. I never wanted to watch Game of thrones, na temptation forced me.

Just in case you want to know, fine girl has been hissing at me in church and has even reported me to some certain people. I know because that was what pastor preached about last Sunday. Young men who cannot control their pricks and lustful desires. One stupid ugly old woman like that too didn't respond when I greeted her. How I wish she listens and finds out I'm innocent. How I wish...!

if this is real then bro, you are a fool, no offense!!!!

myaceworld:
I was going to school this morning when I spotted fine girl from a distance (so you have Xray vision to see beauty from afar?!). Poets no dey carry last na. I approached.

Me: Hi, good morning. I have been staring at you for quite a while now (no woman want to be with psycho type of men who stare at them). Please don't mind my saying you are an excellent and distinctive work of God (all women ARE, get your fact right!). Every strand of hair on your head glows like polished diamond (that was a weave she was wearing on her head, dummy!). Your skin radiates like a blushing sun (its called make up, and most especially FOUNDATION!) and your shape is a testimony that the earth is round (any babe would be offended by that statement).

(Fine girl just dey look like someone in haste but I no mind, I continued...) (thats when you should have taken a hint that your rubbish was stale and move along...)

I'm Micheal by name and I'm addicted to being friend with angels like you (what woman in her right mind want some men addicted to ALL beautiful women?!). Would you please give me your contact at least because I see you are in haste (asking for her number while you havent said OR showed anything worthy of yourself?!).

(Fine girl's phone rang and she picked...)
Fine girl (to the caller): Hello dear. I'll be there in a jiffy. Just wait a bit more. Love you dear.

Na so fine girl flagged down a cab, entered and looked at me with one horror face (what else did you expect from the above rubbish?!).

It's opposite a bank and the people at the ATM stand were just looking at me. Some of them laughing. I just carry my leg waka, make I go bathe again for house (you got exactly what you deserve for acting like a clown....).

This world is really a wicked place to be (so because a gal is smart and dont fall for your cheap nonsense pick up lines, it now makes the world a wicked place?! if it is wicked, it is because of men like YOU. get your facts right!).

©Micheal Ace

(FIXED)

They say if devil wants to finish you, he comes in the form of something beautiful and also uses what you like. So devil came to me using one fine girl as vessel yesterday.

I received a call around 9am. It was a very sweet and romantic voice that I even forgot to ask who she was before asking about her welfare. She later explained she's a polyte and also one of my Facebook friends. She said she read my poem 'If I call you an African woman' and she really loved it. She said she would like us to meet and perhaps become good friends.

Huh? Isn't this a style of toasting? There is nothing else I have ever wanted from poetry than this: to become a superstar and have beautiful ladies all around me. My dream is becoming a reality small small.

I was to write a test that afternoon at 3pm but we weren't sure if the lecturer would be around, so I stayed online to receive updates from the class whatsapp group. Immediately I dropped her call, i stopped reading and dressed up. Who book epp.

I was with fine girl throughout. Strolling around her department, chatting, laughing, we were having fun. We even talked about poetry. Chai, I love that. She went for lecture around 2pm and I followed her. We sat at the back and continued our discussion. All this while, i didn't have time to check my phone until she released me around 4pm when she finished lecture and wanted to go home.

I unlocked my phone and checked my whatsapp messages only to find out the lecturer was already in class. I rushed down immediately. Fortunately, they were just about to start the test. Unfortunately, the lecturer did not allow me in. I pleaded the best way I could (I sha cannot be crying and prostrating when he is not God, and imagine, as old as I am). I left knowing 20marks is automatically gone.

I deleted fine girl's number immediately. I didn't get the chance to ask for her Facebook name so I have been checking every of my friend's profile picture since yesterday's evening. I'm tired of searching but I won't give up. I must block her.

Ko ju ma ribi, gbogbo ara loogun e (for your eyes not to see bad thing, every part of your body is the medicine).

©Micheal Ace
#Me_And_Fine_Girl_Series.