Odunharry:

This is true. A situation where alot of ladies today keep hammering on its better they keep Male friends than female friends and that female friends are wicked, backstabbers, bf snatchers etc is just surprising.
I see some of them as people who just can't keep up or have a poor human(woman) relationship and maybe are scared of karma bitin back.
And the bitter truth is many of them will seriously frown at their boo hanging around or keeping lots of female friends.
One thing that also gives me joy is women each other grow.


Each gender isn't perfect.

Bro, you nailed it. Couldn't have said it better.

Nairaboi:

I really agree with your opinion. This is the terrible situation we have found ourselves, as the world has become so bleeped up that negative thoughts and images are conjured just to lay claim to a narrowly thought out idea.
I have very beautiful, intelligent and amazing girls who are close friends with me, we even peck, I kiss some of them on their foreheads and cheeks and I have even been in many of their dressing rooms without any feeling or Sexual arousal or "to bang" plan.
So it beats my imagination that someone will boldly opin that a guy cannot be friends with a girl without an underlying motive. That a bleeped up thought. . .

Hmmmm....na wa o

KelvinC1:



bro my name Na ADOYii Abraham Kelvin from UniJOS..
this your post is the sweetest Nd educated piece I have read on nairaland.. I wanna be a friend.. no fagging bro. 08038036200..

Kikikikikiki

Something light

makydebbie:
I'm coming back to modify.
Oya I'm done cooking.

Op firstly, I'll tell you, you're not insecure in anyway. You're even smart not to over look it and see it as something normal.

Our nowadays ladies, will say girls do backstab, gossip and other shitty things. Truth is, most guys that are 'acting' nice are not so nice. Ladies! Wake up! They just want to fvck you and move on. There's nothing like guys are more caring than ladies. Of course they want your honeypot so why will they show their real colors? From friend, to bestie, to confidant, to friends with benefits without you knowing how you guys ended up there. Guys are smart, they'll take your excesses, they'll listen to your rant, they'll comfort you. My dear, it's all for the greater good. If you don't like female friends, then be on your own. It's not every boy on the street that is your male friend. Most of them will even see your actions as green light, but then, you're just nice to your 'friend'.

At the end, they just want to fvck you. Later we'll see thread that "all guys are the same". Everything starts from friendship, they'll start from there, when they're done destroying your pussy, you'll be wondering why nigga doesn't have your time again. You gave him the opportunity on a golden platter. Guys are very patient, they'll wait, take your rubbish, fvck, move on and tell their friends. I don talk my own.
Ladies, be wise. You no fit keep yam and goat together, something must happen.

I don create thread on it sef.
https://www.nairaland.com/4025368/friendship-opposite-sex#down

This is very shallow. There's more to life than this.

Rorachy:
I don't blame her, being friends with guys is a lot easier and quarrel-free, girls and their wahala too much.

Betrayal, gossip, backstabbing, boyfriend snatching, not every girl can stand it from their fellow girls.

God bless u my friend. U are very correct.

holocron:


Hmmmm....na wa o

Ogbeni , It's all about the mindset. I have already zeroed my mind that the girls are good friends and we shouldn't be carried away with the sex shit. I even had to slap one of my female friends the day she asked to spend a night in my house as her rommie had travelled. I agreed, took her out, we cooked dinner, watched movies and went to bed, she taking the bed while I decided to lay on the floor. Only for me to notice a hand running over my shorts (boxers) around 1 am, and I cautioned her, but instead she was intensifying her effort to grab my banana. Na so I tear her one Def Jam o

Odunharry:

No. .. Has any lady snatched ur boo bfre?

not really but we both had a crush on this guy and i lost, that taught me a lot actually. But today if i see a guy whose attention is not on me alone, i will cut him loose, it is not by force, you are not the only one who is being crushed on. i cannot kill myself

I have more male friends than female friends....and I know what friendship is and what a lover is......
Always know the boundaries....
There are bound to be intersections but....be aware of such and take a stand.

don't call ex lovers friends.....that's the mistake many people make....

saasala:


Your boo boo is mumu....Limit abi cut them off totally.

why would you say so. Lemme not say I word that would restart your memory this morning

@op, the girl will be raped one day and pretends as nothing happens. the circle will continue as guys keep apologizing.

makydebbie:
I'm coming back to modify.
Oya I'm done cooking.

Op firstly, I'll tell you, you're not insecure in anyway. You're even smart not to over look it and see it as something normal.

Our nowadays ladies, will say girls do backstab, gossip and other shitty things. Truth is, most guys that are 'acting' nice are not so nice. Ladies! Wake up! They just want to fvck you and move on. There's nothing like guys are more caring than ladies. Of course they want your honeypot so why will they show their real colors? From friend, to bestie, to confidant, to friends with benefits without you knowing how you guys ended up there. Guys are smart, they'll take your excesses, they'll listen to your rant, they'll comfort you. My dear, it's all for the greater good. If you don't like female friends, then be on your own. It's not every boy on the street that is your male friend. Most of them will even see your actions as green light, but then, you're just nice to your 'friend'.

At the end, they just want to fvck you. Later we'll see thread that "all guys are the same". Everything starts from friendship, they'll start from there, when they're done destroying your pussy, you'll be wondering why nigga doesn't have your time again. You gave him the opportunity on a golden platter. Guys are very patient, they'll wait, take your rubbish, fvck, move on and tell their friends. I don talk my own.
Ladies, be wise. You no fit keep yam and goat together, something must happen.

I don create thread on it sef.
https://www.nairaland.com/4025368/friendship-opposite-sex#down

First you need to know what friendship really is....there's a difference between a friend and an acquaintance....and a potential or already lover
If a boy hangs around claiming friendship just so he can hit it.....he isn't better than other men out there....
Speak for yourself buddy....if that's how you are.... then you aren't trustworthy as an individual....
Some ladies make that mistake...yes I agree.....but there a difference between a friend and a lover....

My friend can never be my lover....and a lover present or ex can never be my friend....

I have learnt early in life to categorize people. aka...I can "zone" people well.

for the love of God... girls gotta have male friends and visa-versa, so whatever happens between both of them depends on how they interpret their friendship.
bottom line a lady can keep as many male friends as she wants but the outcomes depends on how they define their friendship knowing fully well what's out of bounds
I've said my own.

Those of you saying that all a guy wants from a girl is to have sex in the name of friendship need to grow up. There is more to life than just sex sex sex.

There is nothing wrong with that. I think she is just comfortable with guys or mayb whe grow up around guys. I have more of male friends dan females friends, yeah! very few ladies indulge in intellectual discussion, all they do is try to criticise, gossip or talk down about a girl that obviously they can not be like or one maga they just met, or how Kim did plastic surgery and her boobs are falling, certainly those discussions can not change the condition of the country. So if a lady wants to hang around guys let her be, she got her reasons.

funmisticqueen:
not really but we both had a crush on this guy and i lost, that taught me a lot actually. But today if i see a guy whose attention is not on me alone, i will cut him loose, it is not by force, you are not the only one who is being crushed on. i cannot kill myself

Lmao.. Its a game and there will surely be those who will get it and those who won't. Its good u learnt something, but that doesn't mean u should even feel bad cos a friend won a crush over and u couldn't.

Who knows maybe you didn't make the first move or ur game isn't that tight then.

this kind of frienship doesn't make sense,either intelligent or not, to my own view she might be dating one of them

Remijuice:

I bow and tremble!
see sense

Dike my son!

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!! SHE'S A FEMALE COVERT NARCISSIST (Google more about it)!... Such girls have suffered from Daddy Issues or molestation while growing up as kids. They then HATE themselves and feel worthless! The only way they can get any sense of self worth is by having multiple dating partners (they are cheaters)... And they out to break as many hearts as they can (to fill a sense of self worth again).

Oh,... By the way, THEY DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS !!!!!!!!!! And they appear cool, nice and innocent. Their true self is nasty! Run from every girl that has No friends or hobby/passion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tamarapetty:
i don't have a bestfriend, talk less of a friend. i love being on my own! zero worries.

#introvert and a textrovert

But you don't look like an introvert... and if that's you, you so pretty o
.damn

After reading 6 pages of comments, Is it not strange that 99% of femaile posters claim they have more male friends than female?

Could it be that these guys are actually waiting for an opportunity like some posters claim?

Some guys have been firiendzoned. Some know it and can wait 10yrs in this zone, these are actually the dangerous guys. Some bare their minds and move on

Also, any guys that claim he has more female friemds is just a player and Number 1 pretender.

Ladies, be careful with your so called closed male friends, especailly those that do favor for you without expectations. Of course they want something.

The most dangerous guys are the overly nice and patient ones. By the time you end up sleeping with him as a lady, you will still be wondering how it happened.

Opposite sex can be friends, but close ones is a fraud. One or both are just pretending. You can take this to the bank

Acidosis:


lmao


Many women here are blatantly ignorant. No woman in a serious relationship (I mean one that's leading to marriage in a year or less) can entertain that idea.


Majority of those clamouring for serious friendship (not co-worker or acquaintance) with males are really not in any serious relationship.

I get your point, sir. But I believe a girl can really be friends with a guy and vice versa; however the opposite sex MUST NOT graduate to a best friend. That is big no no.

Prec1ous:


Boss, leave them and there so called male friends.

People who have seen things are talking, inexperienced fellas are also countering.

I will say it again, you only know yourself but cannot estimate how the other person is seeing you and interpreting your actions.

You give him an innocent hug everyday, sister, he may think you are leading him on.

Fix your issues and get a same sex friend.

Blunt, precise, no sentiments. Kudos!

Josephamstrong1:


I beg to disagree this time.
My ex had this good male friend that she convinced me of being so proud of. The guy exudes maturity when I see their chat and phone conversations. The day we had a little argument, she left and stayed with this her guy friend who f*cked her for days... Lol.
Male friends are just like parasites or this nice guy next door waiting for an opportunity to strike. Get rid of them if you're in a serious relationship.
Arrest my case.

How did you know about the fvck bro... she told you?

olaboy1:
I think some girls keep close male friends for validation, financial support, educational support and lastly sex.
Girls are very smart and believe that not keeping those beta males as close friends would not bring anything to the table...I knew some girls back in the days who played guys whilst assuring them of some fake friendship.

Girls know fellow girls like themselves can't be used for financial gains, so they are quick to call the beta guys their closest friends. Often times the guys are far below the girls in the looks department, so they can rationalize it in their heads that no sex could ever happen considering the zero attraction they have for those beta guys.

The downside is that this beta guy who is more than happy to be placed in the friend zone initially, would one day become sexually violent after norturing those sexual feelings for years and analyzing all the cost implications.

The only time such a friendship may end up sex free is if the girl is like 8/10 and Mr nice guy is 4/10 in appearance.

If you are in a committed relationship, you should only keep casual male friends and stop sleeping over at best male friends. I don't believe that shit that girls don't get along with girls. What happens in a girl to girl relationship is obtainable in a guy to guy relationship, it's all excuse for freebies and stuffs.

God bless you!

Guys need to be wise. You understand why girls value male friendship more.

sexybbstar:
I have female "companions" but my real friends are guys.i confide in guys more than ladies.None of my male friends has ever hurt me before but I've been hurt by ladies several times.I prefer male friends to female friends.

Forget the "hurt" part!...You want to tell me none of your Male friends has neither hit on you nor asked you out?

styles71:

I've been on nairaland for years, & i must say, this is one of the wisest posts i've ever seen...experience they say, is the best teacher, & indeed you have been taught

Lol ......my brother it is what it is...

JeffreyJamez:
Those of you saying that all a guy wants from a girl is to have sex in the name of friendship need to grow up. There is more to life than just sex sex sex.

Abi you sef no see them

Nairaboi:

I really agree with your opinion. This is the terrible situation we have found ourselves, as the world has become so bleeped up that negative thoughts and images are conjured just to lay claim to a narrowly thought out idea.
I have very beautiful, intelligent and amazing girls who are close friends with me, we even peck, I kiss some of them on their foreheads and cheeks and I have even been in many of their dressing rooms without any feeling or Sexual arousal or "to bang" plan.
So it beats my imagination that someone will boldly opin that a guy cannot be friends with a girl without an underlying motive. That a bleeped up thought. . .

My brother, it also beats my imagination where they all come across such guys

makydebbie:
Thanks my dear.

lol..welcome

makydebbie:
I'm coming back to modify.
Oya I'm done cooking.

Op firstly, I'll tell you, you're not insecure in anyway. You're even smart not to over look it and see it as something normal.

Our nowadays ladies, will say girls do backstab, gossip and other shitty things. Truth is, most guys that are 'acting' nice are not so nice. Ladies! Wake up! They just want to fvck you and move on. There's nothing like guys are more caring than ladies. Of course they want your honeypot so why will they show their real colors? From friend, to bestie, to confidant, to friends with benefits without you knowing how you guys ended up there. Guys are smart, they'll take your excesses, they'll listen to your rant, they'll comfort you. My dear, it's all for the greater good. If you don't like female friends, then be on your own. It's not every boy on the street that is your male friend. Most of them will even see your actions as green light, but then, you're just nice to your 'friend'.

At the end, they just want to fvck you. Later we'll see thread that "all guys are the same". Everything starts from friendship, they'll start from there, when they're done destroying your pussy, you'll be wondering why nigga doesn't have your time again. You gave him the opportunity on a golden platter. Guys are very patient, they'll wait, take your rubbish, fvck, move on and tell their friends. I don talk my own.
Ladies, be wise. You no fit keep yam and goat together, something must happen.

I don create thread on it sef.
https://www.nairaland.com/4025368/friendship-opposite-sex#down

The almighty Lord that has bestowed upon you "Wisdom, knowledge and Understanding" won't leave you for the enemies to kill...Thank you very much for this piece...Infact, I broke up with my Ex just because of this same issue...too many guys always calling them her friends...she'll always go out/hangout with them in their cars and what have you, always going to their houses to cook for them...uses them as her dps anytime they hangout etc...Initially, I was cool with it...but later, I started noticing she was getting carried away then I started calling her attention to it...Then she started saying I was Insecured, I don't trust her...blah blah...This was a girl that followed a Male friend to a hotel to spend a week with him(with another Female friend of hers)...I just had to break up with her...I cannot coman kill myself

AreaFada2:

I wonder.

A couple my female friends met their hubbies through me. My buddies that the girls knew through me. These are very fine girls too. But I never for once considered any romance with them. Do not ruin a beautiful innocent friendship with love matter that fundamentally changes the equation & chemistry.

If you have a long enduring good friendship with a girl, do not bring romance in ever. Unless you were always "codedly" in love with her and were only bidding your time.

Remember that your dear female friend might have one or two aspects that you do not find attractive in a "woman". It can be her attitude towards money, lack of punctuality, etc. But does not diminish your "agape love" for her. Perhaps because she has many other endearing aspects or you just simply like her.

Not every "fine" girl is automatically romantically attractive. I found this out as a student when one had female student friends from across the world. Different attitudes, colours, shapes & sizes. You learn to crystallize what really matter to you in a woman.

I know many women with mostly male friends. For many reasons. Many claim that male friendship has far less drama, envy,bitching, hypocrisy but more honesty, genuine assistance & support, etc.

Growing up, I also had roughly more female friends than male friends. Until most got married. Knowing that most men would consider their their wives being close to a guy as unpalatable, I gradually kept my distance from those married female friends.

Which led to some of those female friends questioning whether I was unhappy that they are now married. I just try to explain that I do not want to cause any unnecessary issues in their homes just by being too available.

The thing sef dey funny ooo. I wonder the kids they are all keeping as friends