Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by mudia3012: 12:58pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
nah suffer you won go suffer that poor girl nah |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Nobody: 12:59pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Raiyell:
I don't understand what you mean by "throats are cut." Care to explain?
Meanwhile, I think it's a serious disservice to encourage anyone to live on such low earnings. I can't imagine the inherent hardships such a person will pass through.
Is ante-natal free in the north? How about quality education, food, shelter etc.? Do things cost a kobo for a dozen in the North?
Please, educate me. He meant Lagos is for fast paced life. It is the New York of Nigeria. #Lasgidistateofmind |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by tonquendo4u(m): 1:01pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
35k salary? And you're just 30? And wanna marry a student? Why d rush? Hunger go finish una o. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Olami90: 1:04pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Bigsteveg:
The mistake people make starts from the wedding. How will a girl tell me she does not want to have a low key wedding. For me, wedding is over hyped, I'll just go to registry and move on. Any body not okay with that should mind his/her life. Why will I feed a thousand people and drink garri in my own house later. Nonsense Thank you my brother. You are spot on OP's wife to-be is undoubtedly simple and understanding which is truthfully rare. That lady that quoted me typed nonsense and generalized(especially for someone you know nothing about) just to gather likes |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by otr1(m): 1:08pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Nice analysis. But my 2 kobo, expand your farm and make provisions for unforeseen health issue. I'm suprised you didn't make provisions for that... |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by steryj(m): 1:17pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
WetinConsignMe:
Oh so sorry oga Lala. Didn't know it was.you.o. Next time.Ill.check the moniker b4 I type nonsense. I am the hediot. shot yourself in the foot ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Nobody: 1:18pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
greatnaija01: BRO YOU ARE ON POINT.... pls NEXT YEAR after your 1year marriage celebrations, KINDLY MAKE ANOTHER POST AND REFER TO THIS THREAD so we have a follow up cos usually PEOPLE'S MOUTH AND IDEAOLOGY CHANGES AFTER 1-3YEARS OF MARRIAGE.
It was people who married like you are about to that Advised me to wait.... You didnt mention the economic Situation... every marriage where BUHARI and His political issues are not planned for usually get rude shocks.
I salute your faith and courage. I will rather pity you. The op is so on point. This was my case 3 years ago. I'm so happy I made that decision. I will continue after I charge my phone. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Uzyvicks(f): 1:19pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
I love the breakdown. Bravo |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Nobody: 1:21pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
donpata: I was moved to write this epistle cos of the fp topic of marrying someone who earns 35k yesterday. I have seen such questions on NL but I normally ignore them. Someone even asked if a lady can marry someone who earns 100k . I normally laugh at the comments and move on. I laughed at the sheer ignorance of many commenters, and the foolish statements many made. I decided to assume that 70% of the people who commented are either undergraduates still studying who have a big Disney picture of the sweet employment awaiting them or some who have not really known what is out there in the world. The remaining 20% earn well probably and so feel life should be like that for everyone. The remaining 10% commenters are those who really see life as it is in reality – DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. Now am gonna be objective and subjective at the same time. And let me warn you – IT’S LONG ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
Me? 30yrs, had my BSc in the north but did my MSc at UI. Hoping to register for Phd by next year. My fiancée? 24ys old and currently awaiting 300 lv registration. Will be done by 2019.
Fact: without any serious research, I think I am save to say that at least 50% of families (basically father and mother) in Nigeria earn a combined income of less than 40k in a month. Fact: The federal govt claims it has about 100k civil servants. Add paramilitary and military with about 500k personnel and public office holders, I think 800k people in active service on FG’s payroll is a fair judgment. For the sake of argument, let’s assume fg has another 800k retired personnel on pension. That’s like 1.6 million people. Nigeria has a population of 180million people. The WB estimate Nigeria has a workforce of about 60 million in 2016. If we delete the 1.6million on FGs payroll, we still have about 58.4million people left. Obviously, the remaining are left for the State and Local govt as well as private sector to employ. How many are employed? Lagos state claims it has about 100,000 workers in its payroll. Let me be liberal enough to use it as a benchmark for all Nigerian states and fct. 100k by 37 = 3.7million employees. Obviously, we still have over 50million people to employ. How many will the Real private sector pick? Yeah those that will pay a graduate from 60k above – how many can they pick? Now many will have to be entrepreneurs, “self-employed” people, petty traders, artisans etc. How much can they really earn monthly?
Fact: 80% of state and LGA workers between level 1 and 10 earn less than 50k in a month. Apart from states like Lagos, Rivers, Akwa Ibom and a few others, most states, especially in the North, pay quite low. On level 8, with Kad Govt, I earn 35-37k. It fluctuates monthly. Note that there are married people with at least 3 children that are on lev 1 - 6. Do the maths.
Wedding: Many asked how one will pay bride price. Well, I have crossed that bridge. I know my status so before I even got a lady, I started buying some stuff like wrappers to keep. More so, my savings, family and friends rally round me and that was solved. Only a foolish lady will think of bride price as an issue here. Except if her family is poor, why should they demand too much?. 2 of my sisters that married had their bride price pegged at 5k each. The total money paid on the first was 25k and 50k for the 2nd. Mind you, they are currently running their masters programme so they ain’t illiterates. Let me stop here.
So the Wedding? How will I handle it? SIMPLE: I AM CUTTING MY COAT ACCORDING TO MY POCKET
Box: I went to the market and saw boxes of 100-200k. I was showed a set of 5 for 30k as well. I opted for a set of 5 at 60k. That’s my own level too. Mind you there were people picking that of 30k too. Different strokes for Different folks.
RECEPTION VENUE: Church Premises. My church got a lot of space so why should I spend 200-500k (that I don’t even have) renting a hall for a 2hr event? A guy who got married last month in my Church did not do reception at all. Again, Different strokes for Different folks.
Wedding Cards: Saw a nice foreign one. They said it will cost me 30k per 100. I needed 500. I was showed another that will cost 5k per 100. I Finally opted for the one of 10k per 100. Even got a 5k discount.
My suit? I opted for a 16k suit and my best man decided to pay for it.
My shoes? I got really nice shoes but coz it’s my day, I opted for new ones. I picked up a very nice one for 2k. It aint top notch quality but it should take me through the day. It can actually pass for a ck or d&g when viewed from a distance.
My Chairs and Canopies? My organizers are 20. Lol . They have paid 80% of the money.
Cake? My aunt who has a HND in catering bla bla and has been in it for almost 15yrs running has taken that as her contribution.
DJ and Camera man? My men in suit, (5 in number) have paid for that service. ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
MC? A friend is good at it. That is his contribution.
Wedding Gown: My cake designer linked me to a lady who rents out. She thus charged us 10k for a nice wedding gown. I deposited 5k. Will pay 5k after the event. Need I continue? I don’t think so.
The main thing – The marriage life Yeah I know you are saying all I have said na wash. You are waiting for how reality will hit me after the marriage cos that’s the main deal. You gonna say you await my regret thread after some few months. Sorry, your expectation will be cut short.
Fees: Now, my to-be wife will be registering for a new session by December. Her fees is just arnd 30k so I kept that amount and I have promised myself not to touch it until its time. I don’t even need to touch it. Everything appears almost set and done.
Clothing: I filled my wife’s box to the “brim” with both native and English wears. So for now, cloths aint really an issue.
Accommodation: Here in KD, a 1 bedroom mini flat cost between 80-150k depending on the location. Am not talking of a 2 room flat cos, truly, I don’t need it now. But I am not even thinking of taking the mini flat either. A room and parlor (real face me I face u) cost between 18k-45k depending on the location. There are better ones; mostly new houses that cost 40-60k. I’ve gotten a very nice one for 55k. Just 2 tenants in the house and the other guy is single so we just gonna be sharing the toilet with him. It’s not that I can’t afford it but wisdom must direct me. I got 2plots of land already so I don’t even intend staying in that house beyond a year or 2.
My building: I already have 2 plots of land. I’ve struck an agreement with some guys who will supply me mud blocks at N20 each. At my estimate of 3000 blocks, that’s 60k . Havent paid but after my wedding, I will do it jejely. My plan is to rush the building and roof it b4 the rains come next year. I paid some guys in my area 7k so by next week, they are gonna go there and dig the foundation of a 2bedroom flat for me. Not that I am building now but I have to dig during the rainy season cos the land gets hard during the dry season. My intention is to use just ¼ of the land for that so that when I am blessed wella, I will use the remaining ¾ of the land to build my pent house. Need I tell you that by estimates, I need 6 bundles of those “aluminum” sheets to roof it? I bought 3 last year when it was 16k. I could not add cos it went up to 30k. I heard it’s 20k now but I can’t buy the remaining 3 now cos of my wedding preps. Will do that after my wedding when I have relaxed a bit.
Feeding? A 50kg bag of rice takes me over 5 months now that I am alone. I believe in varieties so I got different things stocked in my room. Adding one or two extra plate should not make life difficult. I planted maize on my 2 plots. Once harvested, I won’t need to buy semovita all the time. If you have been to the north, you will know that with my harvest, Tuwo is served. Need I continue? I don’t think so. Let me not bore you further.
My support to extended Families Someone asked in that thread that how do one take care of his families and inlaws. Well, my family aint rich but they can cater for themselves. My dad and mum earn and have only one child left in the university. Moreover, they are sensible enough to know that they should not expect from me. Rather, what is sensible is for them to support me if need be . My fiancées’ parents aint rich either. But I know they aint so poor to demand me to take care of their own responsibility when they know I have their daughter to cater for. Of coz, once in a while, I will do what I can for our families.
Children Just a child and I will pause until she is done with school. I know it’s gonna come with challenges but I don’t think you expect me to plan out every day of my life and budget for same here. I know that I will cross the bridge when I get there.
Other wants I am a gadget freak. Before my wedding preps, I buy things impulsively. Now I know I have to control that. I know what lies ahead of me. That’s why I didn’t go for an iphone but went for a hot note. When the hot note packed up, I didn’t kill myself for a Samsung s7 even though I love it. I went for my sweet Ulefone Tiger @ 31k. When I went for a tab, I didn’t go for an ipad; not even a tecno pad. I went for imose xii . Instead of ps3 console, I download games to my laptop and play them. That serves me.
I CAN TRULY GO ON AND ON BUT CALLING SOMEONE A FOOL AS MANY DID ON THAT THREAD YESTERDAY IS QUITE ILLOGICAL. My dad married at 24. My mum was 19 then. Both are now degree holders. Things have changed and that’s why I am marrying at 30. I don’t want to clock 50 and yet taking my first child to write Common Entrance. If you like say I am rushing. Firstly, I love my fiancée die. 2ndly, I am a Christian and my bodily desires are building up strongly. Marriage is the way out. 3rdly, I love kids. Since they are an inheritance, I can’t wait to have one as God wills. Lastly, I wanna retire in peace. Not old man using my pension to train undergraduates and Jambites. Finally, I am not complacent with where I am. I have handled a few millions before but this is where I am now. I wanna go for my phd and I hope to reestablish myself in business. But I can’t again let my social life suffer cos of where I am today. I have a job now; low paying as it is, I know if well managed, I will make it out. Even if I remain in the employ of the State Govt, I cant earn 35k forever. I am young and will keep moving on.
DISCLAIMER: This is not meant to force anyone to get married when he is not ready - Not at all. I just want some people to know that there are different strokes for different folks. There are too many factors that determine happiness and success in life and marriage. Your salary is just one. YOU CANT CALL ME A FOOL FOR MY DECISION. I HAVE CAREFULLY WEIGHED MY CIRCUMSTANCE AND PROSPECTS AND I FEEL I AM READY TO TAKE THE LEAP. I KNOW IT WONT BE A WALK IN THE PARK; BUT IT WONT BE TOO DIFFICULT EITHER. FOR THE “FOOLS AT 40” WAITING FOR THEIR MILLIONS TO BUILD UP BEFORE SETTLING DOWN, TILL UNA COME. FORGIVE ME FOR THE LONG EPISTLE. HAD TO TAKE MY TIME SO THAT SOME PEOPLE WILL APPRECIATE THAT NO TWO PEOPLE HAVE SAME CIRCUMSTANCES AND SITUATIONS.
I PROMISE TO RAISE ANOTHER THREAD ANNUALLY TO TELL YOU HOW FAR WE HAVE GONE. ![wink](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/wink.png)
don't waste money printing invitation cards,instead photocopy them in 100s |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by olasam218(m): 1:23pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Bro, you are one step away from greatness. Keep on |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by steryj(m): 1:30pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Nukualofa: seriously i felt shallow exchanging words with him. He can't stand my sister i trained through school talk more of opening his mouth if he sees me. Anonymous personality of NL gives a lot of kids the leeway to talk down on people they might work under tomorrow exactly my point! 1 Like |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by kenny1795(m): 1:32pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
donpata:
Thanks for telling me the "truth" sir. But you cant discourage me. Over confidence dey worry me. ![grin](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/grin.png) instead of paying rent, since you have a land.. Two for dat matter, why nt fence it with dat money, knack batcher and live in it for the mean time. It will cost enough cost |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by MrRitchie: 1:47pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Op, I will be 23 in January nxt yr and my daughter will be 2 comes march also, my fiancee got pregnant at the age of 19 am not shy to say it, initially it wasn't easy because I was just a 21yr old guy and she being 19, a jambite who had a good score and preparing for post-utme.
I was working then but earning as little as 25/30k on a monthly basis, initially the family got mad at me, we all know what a family can do to someone in such situation, but at the end of the day, we all came to an agreement, where I will take care of the mother until she gives birth and after birth I will take total responsibility of her and the baby, since she was about going to the university before getting pregnant, the family asked me to take responsibility of her school in case she decides to return to school after giving birth, I agreed because my initial thought was she would return to school after the baby is 2yr old
I didn't allow the situation to turn my life upside down, instead I choose to stand firm and accept my responsibilities, mind you all this while I was only receiving a salary of around 25/30k during and after pregnancy until the baby turned 1yr old
To cut the story short, after my baby's 1st year anniversary and some 6month later things turned around, started earning 100+k, she'll be writing her post utme anytime soon, my child was already in a kindergarten since she was a 1yr old, bought a land.
What am trying to say is, turn your weakness to your strength, don't feel lazy or think your like is at the brink of shrinking, turn all the negativities around any situation you find yourself into possibilities and above all try to be happy even when it seem so difficult.
You can get through any situation if you put on that positive vibes and not giving room for excuses
Even with 20k u can get married but it depends on the kind of lady you're getting married to. 4 Likes |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Nkysuccess(f): 1:48pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Wow @ Op am really impressed with your write up analysis and decision cos this is the real deal. It is not about how much you earn in a month but its about your plans and vision which you av for yourself and your upcoming family and dt is what you have stated clearly here and with this I believe any reasonable Lady will gladly be your wife. Don't mind the people criticising you here becos they are d same people the will use their hard earned money to patronise prostitutes and waste on girlfriends for years just to fulfil their sexual desires instead of them doing the right like you are doing now. My prayer for you is that God will bless you and your marriage and continue to provide for you any good thing you need in life in Jesus name.
Am believing God to bless me with such a reasonable man like you soonest 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by donpata(m): 1:51pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
MrRitchie: Op, I will be 23 in January nxt yr and my daughter will be 2 comes march also, my fiancee got pregnant at the age of 19 am not shy to say it, initially it wasn't easy because I was just a 21yr old guy and she being 19, a jambite who had a good score and preparing for post-utme.
I was working then but earning as little as 25/30k on a monthly basis, initially the family got mad at me, we all know what a family can do to someone in such situation, but at the end of the day, we all came to an agreement, where I will take care of the mother until she gives birth and after birth I will take total responsibility of her and the baby, since she was about going to the university before getting pregnant, the family asked me to take responsibility of her school in case she decides to return to school after giving birth, I agreed because my initial thought was she would return to school after the baby is 2yr old
I didn't allow the situation to turn my life upside down, instead I choose to stand firm and accept my responsibilities, mind you all this while I was only receiving a salary of around 25/30k during and after pregnancy until the baby turned 1yr old
To cut the story short, after my baby's 1st year anniversary and some 6month later things turned around, started earning 100+k, she'll be writing her post utme anytime soon, my child was already in a kindergarten since she was a 1yr old, bought a land.
What am trying to say is, turn your weakness to your strength, don't feel lazy or think your like is at the brink of shrinking, turn all the negativities around any situation you find yourself into possibilities and above all try to be happy even when it seem so difficult.
You can get through any situation if you put on that positive vibes and not giving room for excuses
Even with 20k u can get married but it depends on the kind of lady you're getting married to. Wow!! Wish ur baby good health and long life. Thanks for the encouragement. God bless our hustles. My best friend who we grew up together faced similar situation as u did. They were in school (nursing) with the lady and the lady had to leave school cos if discovered, they could be expelled. He was in his final and things were tough cos he was not earning a dime. Long story short, He works with nnpc now and the wife was able to push through school. She got a job paying her 40k now and their daughter is 6yrs old. It only takes determination and God's favor. 4 Likes |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by MrRitchie: 1:52pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Abeg when u want make he marry, at 50? tonquendo4u: 35k salary? And you're just 30? And wanna marry a student? Why d rush? Hunger go finish una o. 2 Likes |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by MrRitchie: 1:57pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
You're welcome op donpata:
Wow!! Wish ur baby good health and long life. Thanks for the encouragement. God bless our hustles. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by godman01(m): 1:58pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
donpata: I was moved to write this epistle cos of the fp topic of marrying someone who earns 35k yesterday. I have seen such questions on NL but I normally ignore them. Someone even asked if a lady can marry someone who earns 100k . I normally laugh at the comments and move on. I laughed at the sheer ignorance of many commenters, and the foolish statements many made. I decided to assume that 70% of the people who commented are either undergraduates still studying who have a big Disney picture of the sweet employment awaiting them or some who have not really known what is out there in the world. The remaining 20% earn well probably and so feel life should be like that for everyone. The remaining 10% commenters are those who really see life as it is in reality – DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. Now am gonna be objective and subjective at the same time. And let me warn you – IT’S LONG ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
Me? 30yrs, had my BSc in the north but did my MSc at UI. Hoping to register for Phd by next year. My fiancée? 24ys old and currently awaiting 300 lv registration. Will be done by 2019.
Fact: without any serious research, I think I am save to say that at least 50% of families (basically father and mother) in Nigeria earn a combined income of less than 40k in a month. Fact: The federal govt claims it has about 100k civil servants. Add paramilitary and military with about 500k personnel and public office holders, I think 800k people in active service on FG’s payroll is a fair judgment. For the sake of argument, let’s assume fg has another 800k retired personnel on pension. That’s like 1.6 million people. Nigeria has a population of 180million people. The WB estimate Nigeria has a workforce of about 60 million in 2016. If we delete the 1.6million on FGs payroll, we still have about 58.4million people left. Obviously, the remaining are left for the State and Local govt as well as private sector to employ. How many are employed? Lagos state claims it has about 100,000 workers in its payroll. Let me be liberal enough to use it as a benchmark for all Nigerian states and fct. 100k by 37 = 3.7million employees. Obviously, we still have over 50million people to employ. How many will the Real private sector pick? Yeah those that will pay a graduate from 60k above – how many can they pick? Now many will have to be entrepreneurs, “self-employed” people, petty traders, artisans etc. How much can they really earn monthly?
Fact: 80% of state and LGA workers between level 1 and 10 earn less than 50k in a month. Apart from states like Lagos, Rivers, Akwa Ibom and a few others, most states, especially in the North, pay quite low. On level 8, with Kad Govt, I earn 35-37k. It fluctuates monthly. Note that there are married people with at least 3 children that are on lev 1 - 6. Do the maths.
Wedding: Many asked how one will pay bride price. Well, I have crossed that bridge. I know my status so before I even got a lady, I started buying some stuff like wrappers to keep. More so, my savings, family and friends rally round me and that was solved. Only a foolish lady will think of bride price as an issue here. Except if her family is poor, why should they demand too much?. 2 of my sisters that married had their bride price pegged at 5k each. The total money paid on the first was 25k and 50k for the 2nd. Mind you, they are currently running their masters programme so they ain’t illiterates. Let me stop here.
So the Wedding? How will I handle it? SIMPLE: I AM CUTTING MY COAT ACCORDING TO MY POCKET
Box: I went to the market and saw boxes of 100-200k. I was showed a set of 5 for 30k as well. I opted for a set of 5 at 60k. That’s my own level too. Mind you there were people picking that of 30k too. Different strokes for Different folks.
RECEPTION VENUE: Church Premises. My church got a lot of space so why should I spend 200-500k (that I don’t even have) renting a hall for a 2hr event? A guy who got married last month in my Church did not do reception at all. Again, Different strokes for Different folks.
Wedding Cards: Saw a nice foreign one. They said it will cost me 30k per 100. I needed 500. I was showed another that will cost 5k per 100. I Finally opted for the one of 10k per 100. Even got a 5k discount.
My suit? I opted for a 16k suit and my best man decided to pay for it.
My shoes? I got really nice shoes but coz it’s my day, I opted for new ones. I picked up a very nice one for 2k. It aint top notch quality but it should take me through the day. It can actually pass for a ck or d&g when viewed from a distance.
My Chairs and Canopies? My organizers are 20. Lol . They have paid 80% of the money.
Cake? My aunt who has a HND in catering bla bla and has been in it for almost 15yrs running has taken that as her contribution.
DJ and Camera man? My men in suit, (5 in number) have paid for that service. ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
MC? A friend is good at it. That is his contribution.
Wedding Gown: My cake designer linked me to a lady who rents out. She thus charged us 10k for a nice wedding gown. I deposited 5k. Will pay 5k after the event. Need I continue? I don’t think so.
The main thing – The marriage life Yeah I know you are saying all I have said na wash. You are waiting for how reality will hit me after the marriage cos that’s the main deal. You gonna say you await my regret thread after some few months. Sorry, your expectation will be cut short.
Fees: Now, my to-be wife will be registering for a new session by December. Her fees is just arnd 30k so I kept that amount and I have promised myself not to touch it until its time. I don’t even need to touch it. Everything appears almost set and done.
Clothing: I filled my wife’s box to the “brim” with both native and English wears. So for now, cloths aint really an issue.
Accommodation: Here in KD, a 1 bedroom mini flat cost between 80-150k depending on the location. Am not talking of a 2 room flat cos, truly, I don’t need it now. But I am not even thinking of taking the mini flat either. A room and parlor (real face me I face u) cost between 18k-45k depending on the location. There are better ones; mostly new houses that cost 40-60k. I’ve gotten a very nice one for 55k. Just 2 tenants in the house and the other guy is single so we just gonna be sharing the toilet with him. It’s not that I can’t afford it but wisdom must direct me. I got 2plots of land already so I don’t even intend staying in that house beyond a year or 2.
My building: I already have 2 plots of land. I’ve struck an agreement with some guys who will supply me mud blocks at N20 each. At my estimate of 3000 blocks, that’s 60k . Havent paid but after my wedding, I will do it jejely. My plan is to rush the building and roof it b4 the rains come next year. I paid some guys in my area 7k so by next week, they are gonna go there and dig the foundation of a 2bedroom flat for me. Not that I am building now but I have to dig during the rainy season cos the land gets hard during the dry season. My intention is to use just ¼ of the land for that so that when I am blessed wella, I will use the remaining ¾ of the land to build my pent house. Need I tell you that by estimates, I need 6 bundles of those “aluminum” sheets to roof it? I bought 3 last year when it was 16k. I could not add cos it went up to 30k. I heard it’s 20k now but I can’t buy the remaining 3 now cos of my wedding preps. Will do that after my wedding when I have relaxed a bit.
Feeding? A 50kg bag of rice takes me over 5 months now that I am alone. I believe in varieties so I got different things stocked in my room. Adding one or two extra plate should not make life difficult. I planted maize on my 2 plots. Once harvested, I won’t need to buy semovita all the time. If you have been to the north, you will know that with my harvest, Tuwo is served. Need I continue? I don’t think so. Let me not bore you further.
My support to extended Families Someone asked in that thread that how do one take care of his families and inlaws. Well, my family aint rich but they can cater for themselves. My dad and mum earn and have only one child left in the university. Moreover, they are sensible enough to know that they should not expect from me. Rather, what is sensible is for them to support me if need be . My fiancées’ parents aint rich either. But I know they aint so poor to demand me to take care of their own responsibility when they know I have their daughter to cater for. Of coz, once in a while, I will do what I can for our families.
Children Just a child and I will pause until she is done with school. I know it’s gonna come with challenges but I don’t think you expect me to plan out every day of my life and budget for same here. I know that I will cross the bridge when I get there.
Other wants I am a gadget freak. Before my wedding preps, I buy things impulsively. Now I know I have to control that. I know what lies ahead of me. That’s why I didn’t go for an iphone but went for a hot note. When the hot note packed up, I didn’t kill myself for a Samsung s7 even though I love it. I went for my sweet Ulefone Tiger @ 31k. When I went for a tab, I didn’t go for an ipad; not even a tecno pad. I went for imose xii . Instead of ps3 console, I download games to my laptop and play them. That serves me.
I CAN TRULY GO ON AND ON BUT CALLING SOMEONE A FOOL AS MANY DID ON THAT THREAD YESTERDAY IS QUITE ILLOGICAL. My dad married at 24. My mum was 19 then. Both are now degree holders. Things have changed and that’s why I am marrying at 30. I don’t want to clock 50 and yet taking my first child to write Common Entrance. If you like say I am rushing. Firstly, I love my fiancée die. 2ndly, I am a Christian and my bodily desires are building up strongly. Marriage is the way out. 3rdly, I love kids. Since they are an inheritance, I can’t wait to have one as God wills. Lastly, I wanna retire in peace. Not old man using my pension to train undergraduates and Jambites. Finally, I am not complacent with where I am. I have handled a few millions before but this is where I am now. I wanna go for my phd and I hope to reestablish myself in business. But I can’t again let my social life suffer cos of where I am today. I have a job now; low paying as it is, I know if well managed, I will make it out. Even if I remain in the employ of the State Govt, I cant earn 35k forever. I am young and will keep moving on.
DISCLAIMER: This is not meant to force anyone to get married when he is not ready - Not at all. I just want some people to know that there are different strokes for different folks. There are too many factors that determine happiness and success in life and marriage. Your salary is just one. YOU CANT CALL ME A FOOL FOR MY DECISION. I HAVE CAREFULLY WEIGHED MY CIRCUMSTANCE AND PROSPECTS AND I FEEL I AM READY TO TAKE THE LEAP. I KNOW IT WONT BE A WALK IN THE PARK; BUT IT WONT BE TOO DIFFICULT EITHER. FOR THE “FOOLS AT 40” WAITING FOR THEIR MILLIONS TO BUILD UP BEFORE SETTLING DOWN, TILL UNA COME. FORGIVE ME FOR THE LONG EPISTLE. HAD TO TAKE MY TIME SO THAT SOME PEOPLE WILL APPRECIATE THAT NO TWO PEOPLE HAVE SAME CIRCUMSTANCES AND SITUATIONS.
I PROMISE TO RAISE ANOTHER THREAD ANNUALLY TO TELL YOU HOW FAR WE HAVE GONE. ![wink](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/wink.png)
I just had to quote you. Weldone bro and God bless you real good. 1 Like |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Edesinpayan(m): 1:59pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
The OP is focused and has a well planned future but life is full of uncertainties and unwanted circumstances. You have a fixed salary and no additional source of income. Save and Invest with that monthly 35k so as to improve your financial level. I don't think there's pressure on you to get married, so why the rush.
Abeg nor too depend on that 35k monthly salary, it's nothing....
Because say the girl dey understand no make u subject her to abject poverty
Time still dey to improve on ur finances ,do it now, suffer alone Tru sowing and enjoy married life thru harvest Abeg.... |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by ofuonyebi: 1:59pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Congrats for celebrating yourself..
Afterall you are shoulder higher and above all your mates who just died yesterday..
and lost all dreamed opportunity.. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by JeffreyJamez(m): 2:05pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
pocohantas: You have lots of support system, not everyone is this lucky. You also didn't tell us you most likely have another source of income. You buy impulsively according to your writeup, who does that with 35-37k salary?
If they say they can't marry with 35k, leave it for them. Wish them the best... While they wish you same.
They are not rare. They are everywhere. OP, is very discerning that's why he could pick her out of all the karashikas. Some of you want a girl with the so called 'slay queen' looks and body ...someone you can flaunt around as high class babe.
That's how you guys end up ignoring the modest babe because she doesn't look overly flashy. When slayqueen slays una pocket, you come to NL and shout all girls are the same.
Start observing pre-wedding pictures henceforth. Watch how modest young men go for modest young women. The best thing that can happen to anyone...male or female, is to know your size, it's not an insult...it's for ones peace of mind. Lol Truth is ehn, When a guy is ready to settle down,they actually ignore the slay queens and go for the modest "just there" ladies. To most guys, Slay queens na just to scratch prick. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by djon78(m): 2:05pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
princeeze1: I am forced to respond to this thread, I work in a private firm, got married 2 yes ago on a 120k per month sal. Company restructured and slashed sal to 65k for me, mind you, those considered expendable lost their jobs. My wife, a student I am training, currently have a 1,year old son. Believe me we are not hungry.
How do we cope: a careful breakdown. FOOD... We buy what we can consume every month end on this basis. Rice-2 painter=#3600 Beans-1 painter=#1800 Garri-2panter=#1600 Yams. =#2000 Egg crate=#800 Red oil, big eva can =#900 G oil, same size. =#800 Ingredients, maggi, pepper, salt, onions etc=#1000 Total=#12500. Gas #2000 actually #1800 for 5kg bringing total to #14500
My son now eats adult food along golden morn Golden morn 2 big pack=#1500 Milk...123 peak for kids 2=#1800 Usual drugs for children, bonabebe, paracetamol, cold drugs etc =#1500 Total=#4800
Actual cooking We cook once in a month and stock in d freezer, all we need do everyday is boil rice and make EBA. Or rather cook yam porridge or yam n egg. To cook soup, egusi and ogbon, Egusi 12cups is #1200, my wife also buys ogbono 1500,, tomato fruit and canned and fresh pepper for stew #1500. Meat to cook all 3=#6000, other things she may buy like vegetables n kpomo etc#1000, total =#11200
Other bills CTL cable TV #3200 Light =#1000 Waste mgt=500 Fuel for gen, 1k per WK=4000 My recharge n data=3000 Wify recharge n data=2000, I call more lol Her hair and cream, I don't know her she partitions it is #4000 Total=#17700
Grand total is #48200, So I simply give her 50k monthly to pay for everything at the end of every month. And yes unless you are blind, you can see we are well covered, mind you she and not me drew up our new spending pattern, what a good wife should be able to do. I save a mandatory 15000k every month, which is #180k per annum, I live in a 2 bedroom flat of 150k, with finance falling down, I simply rented out d guest room for 70k, call me greedy, mind you my guest room has no access to my living room and master room, I only share kitchen, now I only have to pay 80k per annum. .I still have change.
I make bold to say we live very comfortably. Am I making plans to up my finances again YES. I only made this break down in support of op, from his breakdown, he may not live to even my now manageable standard, but he can, because he has focus.
Lastly we have a good ride, but mostly used socially and for church, I don't fuel or maintain my car from salary, occasional once in a while free cash maybe from office runs does that, everyone who works must have that loose free office change from one or two racket.
Moral..... LIFE IS ABOUT VISION, WHOEVER CANNOT MAKE ANYTHING OUT OF 35K WILL MAKE NOTHING OUT OF 200K, BECAUSE THE HIGHER YOU GO, THE BIGGER YOUR TASTE. I CUT DOWN MY TASTE, WE HAD A PAID HOUSE MAID AND A LAUNDRY GUY TOO, COMBINE SALARY OF 25K, MY WIFE DOES THAT NOW, WE USED TO PUT ON GEN EVERY NIGHT THERE IS NO LIGHT, NOW UNLESS, THERE IS CONSECUTIVE OUTAGE, DUE TO FOOD IN D FRIDGE, NO NEED AND YES WE DO HAVE NEPA LIGHT AT LEAST 10 HOURS EVERYDAY, I USED TO DRIVE TO GO AND BUY ORDINARY AKARA, NO MORE, I USED TO BE AN OMELORA, NO MORE NOW.
IF YOU LACK FOCUS, YOUR EARNING POWER WILL STILL BE MEANINGLESS. Nice one!! You know over time I have learnt a lot in this life, I have lost millions, lost almost everything I had and started life afresh. But when I had those millions, my God I was so wasteful with money. What I earn now monthly is very very small, but the funny thing is I am achieving more with the meagre money I make now than when I had my millions. I began educating myself on financial management. Many in this nation have very poor financial management knowledge. Sheikh Mohamed ruler of dubai made one statement in his book 'my vision' : it is not the amount you make, but how you use the one you make. Also I recommend this two books by Dr Stanley Millionaires next door and Millionaire Mind. The book was a study done on millionaires in America. two things I got from that book is that most millionaires in America live a very frugal lifestyle, they accumulated wealth over time, they watched their expenses, they never lived above their means, and over decades they have accumulated fortunes. Another important finding from that book was that choice of spouse was very important to the wealth they accumulated. 4 Likes |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by bedfordng(m): 2:08pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
the op has lots of support from external source . this is not same for others. you guys should take note of that. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by crunchyg: 2:08pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Merryglad: Bravo op! Sometimes i cant help but wounder where my generation is heading to.....thank God we still have some sane people around like you. The earlier people realise they not in this world to impress anyone the better for them. Wonderful comment up there. Beauty and brain |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by mrsfavour(f): 2:11pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
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Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Merryglad(f): 2:13pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
crunchyg:
Wonderful comment up there. Beauty and brain Thank you |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by greatnaija01: 2:23pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Man of God, Papa I greet you. You are a great man of God with ministry sons and daughters. Kindly remember that not everyone has your standard, to some of us, your standard for marriage is so high and you had FAITH too. But to others it maybe low. I only implore you to consider and be praying for us o. Am not ready to marry and be sponsoring a woman in school or without a steady 6 figure income. As a single life is touch... not to now talk of marriage. sdkalu:
I will rather pity you. The op is so on point. This was my case 3 years ago. I'm so happy I made that decision. I will continue after I charge my phone. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by ourleader(m): 2:24pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
donpata: I was moved to write this epistle cos of the fp topic of marrying someone who earns 35k yesterday. I have seen such questions on NL but I normally ignore them. Someone even asked if a lady can marry someone who earns 100k . I normally laugh at the comments and move on. I laughed at the sheer ignorance of many commenters, and the foolish statements many made. I decided to assume that 70% of the people who commented are either undergraduates still studying who have a big Disney picture of the sweet employment awaiting them or some who have not really known what is out there in the world. The remaining 20% earn well probably and so feel life should be like that for everyone. The remaining 10% commenters are those who really see life as it is in reality – DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. Now am gonna be objective and subjective at the same time. And let me warn you – IT’S LONG ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
Me? 30yrs, had my BSc in the north but did my MSc at UI. Hoping to register for Phd by next year. My fiancée? 24ys old and currently awaiting 300 lv registration. Will be done by 2019.
Fact: without any serious research, I think I am save to say that at least 50% of families (basically father and mother) in Nigeria earn a combined income of less than 40k in a month. Fact: The federal govt claims it has about 100k civil servants. Add paramilitary and military with about 500k personnel and public office holders, I think 800k people in active service on FG’s payroll is a fair judgment. For the sake of argument, let’s assume fg has another 800k retired personnel on pension. That’s like 1.6 million people. Nigeria has a population of 180million people. The WB estimate Nigeria has a workforce of about 60 million in 2016. If we delete the 1.6million on FGs payroll, we still have about 58.4million people left. Obviously, the remaining are left for the State and Local govt as well as private sector to employ. How many are employed? Lagos state claims it has about 100,000 workers in its payroll. Let me be liberal enough to use it as a benchmark for all Nigerian states and fct. 100k by 37 = 3.7million employees. Obviously, we still have over 50million people to employ. How many will the Real private sector pick? Yeah those that will pay a graduate from 60k above – how many can they pick? Now many will have to be entrepreneurs, “self-employed” people, petty traders, artisans etc. How much can they really earn monthly?
Fact: 80% of state and LGA workers between level 1 and 10 earn less than 50k in a month. Apart from states like Lagos, Rivers, Akwa Ibom and a few others, most states, especially in the North, pay quite low. On level 8, with Kad Govt, I earn 35-37k. It fluctuates monthly. Note that there are married people with at least 3 children that are on lev 1 - 6. Do the maths.
Wedding: Many asked how one will pay bride price. Well, I have crossed that bridge. I know my status so before I even got a lady, I started buying some stuff like wrappers to keep. More so, my savings, family and friends rally round me and that was solved. Only a foolish lady will think of bride price as an issue here. Except if her family is poor, why should they demand too much?. 2 of my sisters that married had their bride price pegged at 5k each. The total money paid on the first was 25k and 50k for the 2nd. Mind you, they are currently running their masters programme so they ain’t illiterates. Let me stop here.
So the Wedding? How will I handle it? SIMPLE: I AM CUTTING MY COAT ACCORDING TO MY POCKET
Box: I went to the market and saw boxes of 100-200k. I was showed a set of 5 for 30k as well. I opted for a set of 5 at 60k. That’s my own level too. Mind you there were people picking that of 30k too. Different strokes for Different folks.
RECEPTION VENUE: Church Premises. My church got a lot of space so why should I spend 200-500k (that I don’t even have) renting a hall for a 2hr event? A guy who got married last month in my Church did not do reception at all. Again, Different strokes for Different folks.
Wedding Cards: Saw a nice foreign one. They said it will cost me 30k per 100. I needed 500. I was showed another that will cost 5k per 100. I Finally opted for the one of 10k per 100. Even got a 5k discount.
My suit? I opted for a 16k suit and my best man decided to pay for it.
My shoes? I got really nice shoes but coz it’s my day, I opted for new ones. I picked up a very nice one for 2k. It aint top notch quality but it should take me through the day. It can actually pass for a ck or d&g when viewed from a distance.
My Chairs and Canopies? My organizers are 20. Lol . They have paid 80% of the money.
Cake? My aunt who has a HND in catering bla bla and has been in it for almost 15yrs running has taken that as her contribution.
DJ and Camera man? My men in suit, (5 in number) have paid for that service. ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
MC? A friend is good at it. That is his contribution.
Wedding Gown: My cake designer linked me to a lady who rents out. She thus charged us 10k for a nice wedding gown. I deposited 5k. Will pay 5k after the event. Need I continue? I don’t think so.
The main thing – The marriage life Yeah I know you are saying all I have said na wash. You are waiting for how reality will hit me after the marriage cos that’s the main deal. You gonna say you await my regret thread after some few months. Sorry, your expectation will be cut short.
Fees: Now, my to-be wife will be registering for a new session by December. Her fees is just arnd 30k so I kept that amount and I have promised myself not to touch it until its time. I don’t even need to touch it. Everything appears almost set and done.
Clothing: I filled my wife’s box to the “brim” with both native and English wears. So for now, cloths aint really an issue.
Accommodation: Here in KD, a 1 bedroom mini flat cost between 80-150k depending on the location. Am not talking of a 2 room flat cos, truly, I don’t need it now. But I am not even thinking of taking the mini flat either. A room and parlor (real face me I face u) cost between 18k-45k depending on the location. There are better ones; mostly new houses that cost 40-60k. I’ve gotten a very nice one for 55k. Just 2 tenants in the house and the other guy is single so we just gonna be sharing the toilet with him. It’s not that I can’t afford it but wisdom must direct me. I got 2plots of land already so I don’t even intend staying in that house beyond a year or 2.
My building: I already have 2 plots of land. I’ve struck an agreement with some guys who will supply me mud blocks at N20 each. At my estimate of 3000 blocks, that’s 60k . Havent paid but after my wedding, I will do it jejely. My plan is to rush the building and roof it b4 the rains come next year. I paid some guys in my area 7k so by next week, they are gonna go there and dig the foundation of a 2bedroom flat for me. Not that I am building now but I have to dig during the rainy season cos the land gets hard during the dry season. My intention is to use just ¼ of the land for that so that when I am blessed wella, I will use the remaining ¾ of the land to build my pent house. Need I tell you that by estimates, I need 6 bundles of those “aluminum” sheets to roof it? I bought 3 last year when it was 16k. I could not add cos it went up to 30k. I heard it’s 20k now but I can’t buy the remaining 3 now cos of my wedding preps. Will do that after my wedding when I have relaxed a bit.
Feeding? A 50kg bag of rice takes me over 5 months now that I am alone. I believe in varieties so I got different things stocked in my room. Adding one or two extra plate should not make life difficult. I planted maize on my 2 plots. Once harvested, I won’t need to buy semovita all the time. If you have been to the north, you will know that with my harvest, Tuwo is served. Need I continue? I don’t think so. Let me not bore you further.
My support to extended Families Someone asked in that thread that how do one take care of his families and inlaws. Well, my family aint rich but they can cater for themselves. My dad and mum earn and have only one child left in the university. Moreover, they are sensible enough to know that they should not expect from me. Rather, what is sensible is for them to support me if need be . My fiancées’ parents aint rich either. But I know they aint so poor to demand me to take care of their own responsibility when they know I have their daughter to cater for. Of coz, once in a while, I will do what I can for our families.
Children Just a child and I will pause until she is done with school. I know it’s gonna come with challenges but I don’t think you expect me to plan out every day of my life and budget for same here. I know that I will cross the bridge when I get there.
Other wants I am a gadget freak. Before my wedding preps, I buy things impulsively. Now I know I have to control that. I know what lies ahead of me. That’s why I didn’t go for an iphone but went for a hot note. When the hot note packed up, I didn’t kill myself for a Samsung s7 even though I love it. I went for my sweet Ulefone Tiger @ 31k. When I went for a tab, I didn’t go for an ipad; not even a tecno pad. I went for imose xii . Instead of ps3 console, I download games to my laptop and play them. That serves me.
I CAN TRULY GO ON AND ON BUT CALLING SOMEONE A FOOL AS MANY DID ON THAT THREAD YESTERDAY IS QUITE ILLOGICAL. My dad married at 24. My mum was 19 then. Both are now degree holders. Things have changed and that’s why I am marrying at 30. I don’t want to clock 50 and yet taking my first child to write Common Entrance. If you like say I am rushing. Firstly, I love my fiancée die. 2ndly, I am a Christian and my bodily desires are building up strongly. Marriage is the way out. 3rdly, I love kids. Since they are an inheritance, I can’t wait to have one as God wills. Lastly, I wanna retire in peace. Not old man using my pension to train undergraduates and Jambites. Finally, I am not complacent with where I am. I have handled a few millions before but this is where I am now. I wanna go for my phd and I hope to reestablish myself in business. But I can’t again let my social life suffer cos of where I am today. I have a job now; low paying as it is, I know if well managed, I will make it out. Even if I remain in the employ of the State Govt, I cant earn 35k forever. I am young and will keep moving on.
DISCLAIMER: This is not meant to force anyone to get married when he is not ready - Not at all. I just want some people to know that there are different strokes for different folks. There are too many factors that determine happiness and success in life and marriage. Your salary is just one. YOU CANT CALL ME A FOOL FOR MY DECISION. I HAVE CAREFULLY WEIGHED MY CIRCUMSTANCE AND PROSPECTS AND I FEEL I AM READY TO TAKE THE LEAP. I KNOW IT WONT BE A WALK IN THE PARK; BUT IT WONT BE TOO DIFFICULT EITHER. FOR THE “FOOLS AT 40” WAITING FOR THEIR MILLIONS TO BUILD UP BEFORE SETTLING DOWN, TILL UNA COME. FORGIVE ME FOR THE LONG EPISTLE. HAD TO TAKE MY TIME SO THAT SOME PEOPLE WILL APPRECIATE THAT NO TWO PEOPLE HAVE SAME CIRCUMSTANCES AND SITUATIONS.
I PROMISE TO RAISE ANOTHER THREAD ANNUALLY TO TELL YOU HOW FAR WE HAVE GONE. GUY I PLAN FOLLOWING THIS PATTERN
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Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by modele2: 2:31pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Rorachy: As in eh, I can't even imagine a life with someone on 35k salary, he wants to subject the poor girl to a life of penury. Women should learn to make their own money too. Let her graduate and make something for her self. It's a team 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Coolgent(m): 2:34pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
ImaIma1:
Your earning is not 35k. You wouldn't have been able to achieve all that on 35k even if you studied savings and management in school. You have other money coming in. Op is talking about 35k being the ONLY income. No additional hustling bringing in more. Many people earning little do other things for an alternative source of income. I hqve mentioned before that my basic salary is 35k but am hustling, am sure the Op is also trying to encourage our youth to have other alternative beside SALARY alone. For the sake of clarity; atimes i can live solely on my salary for 2months or more but when the going is good i can get triple of my salary in a month |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Nobody: 2:46pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
donpata: I was moved to write this epistle cos of the fp topic of marrying someone who earns 35k yesterday. I have seen such questions on NL but I normally ignore them. Someone even asked if a lady can marry someone who earns 100k . I normally laugh at the comments and move on. I laughed at the sheer ignorance of many commenters, and the foolish statements many made. I decided to assume that 70% of the people who commented are either undergraduates still studying who have a big Disney picture of the sweet employment awaiting them or some who have not really known what is out there in the world. The remaining 20% earn well probably and so feel life should be like that for everyone. The remaining 10% commenters are those who really see life as it is in reality – DIFFERENT STROKES FOR DIFFERENT FOLKS. Now am gonna be objective and subjective at the same time. And let me warn you – IT’S LONG ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
Me? 30yrs, had my BSc in the north but did my MSc at UI. Hoping to register for Phd by next year. My fiancée? 24ys old and currently awaiting 300 lv registration. Will be done by 2019.
Fact: without any serious research, I think I am save to say that at least 50% of families (basically father and mother) in Nigeria earn a combined income of less than 40k in a month. Fact: The federal govt claims it has about 100k civil servants. Add paramilitary and military with about 500k personnel and public office holders, I think 800k people in active service on FG’s payroll is a fair judgment. For the sake of argument, let’s assume fg has another 800k retired personnel on pension. That’s like 1.6 million people. Nigeria has a population of 180million people. The WB estimate Nigeria has a workforce of about 60 million in 2016. If we delete the 1.6million on FGs payroll, we still have about 58.4million people left. Obviously, the remaining are left for the State and Local govt as well as private sector to employ. How many are employed? Lagos state claims it has about 100,000 workers in its payroll. Let me be liberal enough to use it as a benchmark for all Nigerian states and fct. 100k by 37 = 3.7million employees. Obviously, we still have over 50million people to employ. How many will the Real private sector pick? Yeah those that will pay a graduate from 60k above – how many can they pick? Now many will have to be entrepreneurs, “self-employed” people, petty traders, artisans etc. How much can they really earn monthly?
Fact: 80% of state and LGA workers between level 1 and 10 earn less than 50k in a month. Apart from states like Lagos, Rivers, Akwa Ibom and a few others, most states, especially in the North, pay quite low. On level 8, with Kad Govt, I earn 35-37k. It fluctuates monthly. Note that there are married people with at least 3 children that are on lev 1 - 6. Do the maths.
Wedding: Many asked how one will pay bride price. Well, I have crossed that bridge. I know my status so before I even got a lady, I started buying some stuff like wrappers to keep. More so, my savings, family and friends rally round me and that was solved. Only a foolish lady will think of bride price as an issue here. Except if her family is poor, why should they demand too much?. 2 of my sisters that married had their bride price pegged at 5k each. The total money paid on the first was 25k and 50k for the 2nd. Mind you, they are currently running their masters programme so they ain’t illiterates. Let me stop here.
So the Wedding? How will I handle it? SIMPLE: I AM CUTTING MY COAT ACCORDING TO MY POCKET
Box: I went to the market and saw boxes of 100-200k. I was showed a set of 5 for 30k as well. I opted for a set of 5 at 60k. That’s my own level too. Mind you there were people picking that of 30k too. Different strokes for Different folks.
RECEPTION VENUE: Church Premises. My church got a lot of space so why should I spend 200-500k (that I don’t even have) renting a hall for a 2hr event? A guy who got married last month in my Church did not do reception at all. Again, Different strokes for Different folks.
Wedding Cards: Saw a nice foreign one. They said it will cost me 30k per 100. I needed 500. I was showed another that will cost 5k per 100. I Finally opted for the one of 10k per 100. Even got a 5k discount.
My suit? I opted for a 16k suit and my best man decided to pay for it.
My shoes? I got really nice shoes but coz it’s my day, I opted for new ones. I picked up a very nice one for 2k. It aint top notch quality but it should take me through the day. It can actually pass for a ck or d&g when viewed from a distance.
My Chairs and Canopies? My organizers are 20. Lol . They have paid 80% of the money.
Cake? My aunt who has a HND in catering bla bla and has been in it for almost 15yrs running has taken that as her contribution.
DJ and Camera man? My men in suit, (5 in number) have paid for that service. ![tongue](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/tongue.png)
MC? A friend is good at it. That is his contribution.
Wedding Gown: My cake designer linked me to a lady who rents out. She thus charged us 10k for a nice wedding gown. I deposited 5k. Will pay 5k after the event. Need I continue? I don’t think so.
The main thing – The marriage life Yeah I know you are saying all I have said na wash. You are waiting for how reality will hit me after the marriage cos that’s the main deal. You gonna say you await my regret thread after some few months. Sorry, your expectation will be cut short.
Fees: Now, my to-be wife will be registering for a new session by December. Her fees is just arnd 30k so I kept that amount and I have promised myself not to touch it until its time. I don’t even need to touch it. Everything appears almost set and done.
Clothing: I filled my wife’s box to the “brim” with both native and English wears. So for now, cloths aint really an issue.
Accommodation: Here in KD, a 1 bedroom mini flat cost between 80-150k depending on the location. Am not talking of a 2 room flat cos, truly, I don’t need it now. But I am not even thinking of taking the mini flat either. A room and parlor (real face me I face u) cost between 18k-45k depending on the location. There are better ones; mostly new houses that cost 40-60k. I’ve gotten a very nice one for 55k. Just 2 tenants in the house and the other guy is single so we just gonna be sharing the toilet with him. It’s not that I can’t afford it but wisdom must direct me. I got 2plots of land already so I don’t even intend staying in that house beyond a year or 2.
My building: I already have 2 plots of land. I’ve struck an agreement with some guys who will supply me mud blocks at N20 each. At my estimate of 3000 blocks, that’s 60k . Havent paid but after my wedding, I will do it jejely. My plan is to rush the building and roof it b4 the rains come next year. I paid some guys in my area 7k so by next week, they are gonna go there and dig the foundation of a 2bedroom flat for me. Not that I am building now but I have to dig during the rainy season cos the land gets hard during the dry season. My intention is to use just ¼ of the land for that so that when I am blessed wella, I will use the remaining ¾ of the land to build my pent house. Need I tell you that by estimates, I need 6 bundles of those “aluminum” sheets to roof it? I bought 3 last year when it was 16k. I could not add cos it went up to 30k. I heard it’s 20k now but I can’t buy the remaining 3 now cos of my wedding preps. Will do that after my wedding when I have relaxed a bit.
Feeding? A 50kg bag of rice takes me over 5 months now that I am alone. I believe in varieties so I got different things stocked in my room. Adding one or two extra plate should not make life difficult. I planted maize on my 2 plots. Once harvested, I won’t need to buy semovita all the time. If you have been to the north, you will know that with my harvest, Tuwo is served. Need I continue? I don’t think so. Let me not bore you further.
My support to extended Families Someone asked in that thread that how do one take care of his families and inlaws. Well, my family aint rich but they can cater for themselves. My dad and mum earn and have only one child left in the university. Moreover, they are sensible enough to know that they should not expect from me. Rather, what is sensible is for them to support me if need be . My fiancées’ parents aint rich either. But I know they aint so poor to demand me to take care of their own responsibility when they know I have their daughter to cater for. Of coz, once in a while, I will do what I can for our families.
Children Just a child and I will pause until she is done with school. I know it’s gonna come with challenges but I don’t think you expect me to plan out every day of my life and budget for same here. I know that I will cross the bridge when I get there.
Other wants I am a gadget freak. Before my wedding preps, I buy things impulsively. Now I know I have to control that. I know what lies ahead of me. That’s why I didn’t go for an iphone but went for a hot note. When the hot note packed up, I didn’t kill myself for a Samsung s7 even though I love it. I went for my sweet Ulefone Tiger @ 31k. When I went for a tab, I didn’t go for an ipad; not even a tecno pad. I went for imose xii . Instead of ps3 console, I download games to my laptop and play them. That serves me.
I CAN TRULY GO ON AND ON BUT CALLING SOMEONE A FOOL AS MANY DID ON THAT THREAD YESTERDAY IS QUITE ILLOGICAL. My dad married at 24. My mum was 19 then. Both are now degree holders. Things have changed and that’s why I am marrying at 30. I don’t want to clock 50 and yet taking my first child to write Common Entrance. If you like say I am rushing. Firstly, I love my fiancée die. 2ndly, I am a Christian and my bodily desires are building up strongly. Marriage is the way out. 3rdly, I love kids. Since they are an inheritance, I can’t wait to have one as God wills. Lastly, I wanna retire in peace. Not old man using my pension to train undergraduates and Jambites. Finally, I am not complacent with where I am. I have handled a few millions before but this is where I am now. I wanna go for my phd and I hope to reestablish myself in business. But I can’t again let my social life suffer cos of where I am today. I have a job now; low paying as it is, I know if well managed, I will make it out. Even if I remain in the employ of the State Govt, I cant earn 35k forever. I am young and will keep moving on.
DISCLAIMER: This is not meant to force anyone to get married when he is not ready - Not at all. I just want some people to know that there are different strokes for different folks. There are too many factors that determine happiness and success in life and marriage. Your salary is just one. YOU CANT CALL ME A FOOL FOR MY DECISION. I HAVE CAREFULLY WEIGHED MY CIRCUMSTANCE AND PROSPECTS AND I FEEL I AM READY TO TAKE THE LEAP. I KNOW IT WONT BE A WALK IN THE PARK; BUT IT WONT BE TOO DIFFICULT EITHER. FOR THE “FOOLS AT 40” WAITING FOR THEIR MILLIONS TO BUILD UP BEFORE SETTLING DOWN, TILL UNA COME. FORGIVE ME FOR THE LONG EPISTLE. HAD TO TAKE MY TIME SO THAT SOME PEOPLE WILL APPRECIATE THAT NO TWO PEOPLE HAVE SAME CIRCUMSTANCES AND SITUATIONS.
I PROMISE TO RAISE ANOTHER THREAD ANNUALLY TO TELL YOU HOW FAR WE HAVE GONE. ![wink](https://www.nairaland.com/faces/wink.png)
Mr man, ur monthly income is not 35k. ""Fact: without any serious research, I think I am save to say that at least 50% of families (basically father and mother) in Nigeria earn a combined income of less than 40k in a month"" 50% of families do not earn less than 40k in a month..... except maybe in the north which unhave lived almost ur entire life in. |
Re: I Am 30yrs, Earn 35k A Month And Will Marry A Student In A Months Time. by Nobody: 2:53pm On Sep 07, 2017 |
Oyindidi: Why? That's a guy with well planed life that does not have any connection with planning, it's just a baseless trashy story. He might be earning 35k as salary, but salary is not same as income. From all that he listed, it's obvious 35k can't do all those shit. Even ordinary N200 morning/N200 night food (assuming they feed twice a day) is already 400 +400 = 800. 800 × 30 days = 24,000. rent and electricity = 6000 + 3000 = 9000. 35k has already finished. So who will pay for every other monthly expenses. Trashy article. |