Thanks alot guys but im cumfused weather to or not to marry, some posters are giving me courage while some are discouraging me. this is a very hard for me right now. but its like i see reason with the poster that  use this verse from the bible Luke 12.22-28.

Yes, u can but depending on a number of crucial factors; some of which have been mentioned here. Do u have a high taste, do u have an accommodation, have u saved some money, what are your plans after marriage, do u have the educational or professional qualifications that u think can guarantee u good job after marriage? These are some of the issues u need to sit down and critically examine.

I got married with a monthly salary of 36k, had an  accommodation, had a small car given to me by one of my elder brothers, was living a modest life ( cut my dress according to my material not according to size). The wedding was successful courtesy of the goodwill and generosity of friends and relatives. They soon disappeared after marriage, leaving me to face the reality of life; life after marriage with just 36k a month. My wife too was earning very little but we managed and hoped on God for the best. Honestly, it was not easy, there were times things were so hard for us but we continued praying and believed God who has promised favour to a man who finds a wife. Today, things have changed, my office, against all odds increased my salary from 36k to 120k and my wife equally got increment in her salary.

The truth is, if u want to wait till u have enough or earn 200k per month before getting married, am sorry u may not ever marry. My candid advice, set out your plans, believe God and go on with the wedding arrangements. God will support you all the way. He always delights in marriage cos it is an institution He founded and would do everything and anything to protect and bless it. Good luck!

If u cant live on 40,000, u cant live on 400,000. Its simple logic! Its not how much u earn that matters, what matters is how much u spend?  People live on 20,000 a month and they are happy! Others earn half a million and they still cant break even!!
If ur wife is understanding, she go make 40,000 be like 4million a month

If the majority of advice being given on this forum is followed, then 80% of Nigerians should not marry. Apart from the banking and Oil/Petroleum sectors tell me which other sector can pay a fresh graduate more than N40K/month.

I don't blame them because most of the posters are not in nigeria or have not experienced the reality on ground in nigeria. how many average nigerians can afford a PC not to talk of internet. People should advice based on the reality on ground.

OP if you believe you girl understands your financial capability and is still willing, go ahead and marry

All the best

@ Poster,

Yes you can, provided your wife is very modest and is not a waster of resources. Also, you should have plans of getting a better-paying job and also get your wife involved in some kind of trade.

Marriage works better when the two parties are contributors (financially & in every wise).

OP, I really empathize with your post. I think you can, but here is my viewpoint in details:

You didn't say if your wife is financially stable, but I will assume that she does not even have a job. I will also assume that she is already around the age range where most ladies start to get worried about marriage.

1. It will be very hard on you guys for a while, so she must be understanding and very patient. Both of you must understand the gain of patience and the benefits of saving. You go hustle like there is no tomorrow o, my brother!

2. You must be prepared to stay married for like 3 years without any children to enable you prepare them for a life worth living.

3.  If you really love her and she loves you too, then there's no point putting yourselves through the "horror" of a long relationship, searching for gold. Otherwise, things may go very wrong in your search for gold, you will just see an awning chasm (gap) between the two of you. If you will search for gold, you can do it together (but don't include kids yet. Use contraceptives).

4. Make sure you discuss the implications very well with her. Be prepared to NOT receive help from the extended families, but rather to be expected to give to them. It's all in the making of a man.

I wish you all the best!

oisehumen:

Yes, u can but depending on a number of crucial factors; some of which have been mentioned here. Do u have a high taste, do u have an accommodation, have u saved some money, what are your plans after marriage, do u have the educational or professional qualifications that u think can guarantee u good job after marriage? These are some of the issues u need to sit down and critically examine.

I got married with a monthly salary of 36k, had an  accommodation, had a small car given to me by one of my elder brothers, was living a modest life ( cut my dress according to my material not according to size). The wedding was successful courtesy of the goodwill and generosity of friends and relatives. They soon disappeared after marriage, leaving me to face the reality of life; life after marriage with just 36k a month. My wife too was earning very little but we managed and hoped on God for the best. Honestly, it was not easy, there were times things were so hard for us but we continued praying and believed God who has promised favour to a man who finds a wife. Today, things have changed, my office, against all odds increased my salary from 36k to 120k and my wife equally got increment in her salary.

The truth is, if u want to wait till u have enough or earn 200k per month before getting married, am sorry u may not ever marry. My candid advice, set out your plans, believe God and go on with the wedding arrangements. God will support you all the way. He always delights in marriage cos it is an institution He founded and would do everything and anything to protect and bless it. Good luck!

na so e be o

i remember a couple we know - when they got married they were living in iyana ipaja - their furniture was plastic lawn chairs, and the guy drove a beat up bmw. today they live in ikeja, in a beautifully furnished house, oga driving suv, madam driving her own ride

if u see pics of how some of us and our parents for that matter were living when they first married u go dey laugh

You can marry a woman who doesnt think she has come to suffer with 40,000 whether she works or not. Some persons in government ministries earn about that and less and are married. I have seen a such families in Abuja, they reside at the outskirt of the city or a nearby state. Life may or may not be easy after that but you will definitely get there. Some struggle before or after marriage to have an alternate source of income like giving out bikes or keke on hire purchase. I advise on assumption that you must have worked for a while with savings of about 250,000 and above.

Why can some nairalanders be serious and sincere for once! Someone is been realistic and some people think they can shoot out their tongues to speak anyhow.
What is wrong with marrying with a salary of 40,000 monthly?
What about those that marry with much more monthly earning less than that?
That he marries with 40,000 per month as his earning does not mean he will remain on that scale throughout his life.
SOME OF YOU THAT ARE DRIVING ROUGH WITH YOUR MOUTHS IF YOU WILL BE SINCERE HOW MUCH WAS YOUR SPOUSE EARNING OR YOUR WERE EARNING BEFORE YOU GOT MARRIED.

MY GUY BONE ALL THESE DAY-DREAMERS WHO THINKS THAT IT IS WHEN THEY START BAGGING MONEY TO THE BANK THAT IS WHEN THEY WILL MARRY.
SOME OF THEM DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT BEEN MARRIED IS ALL ABOUT. THEY ARE JUST COLLECTION OF THEORIES.

Why can'T some nairalanders be serious and sincere for once! Someone is been realistic and some people think they can shoot out their tongues to speak anyhow.
What is wrong with marrying with a salary of 40,000 monthly?
What about those that marry with much more monthly earning less than that?
That he marries with 40,000 per month as his earning does not mean he will remain on that scale throughout his life.
SOME OF YOU THAT ARE DRIVING ROUGH WITH YOUR MOUTHS IF YOU WILL BE SINCERE HOW MUCH WAS YOUR SPOUSE EARNING OR YOUR WERE EARNING BEFORE YOU GOT MARRIED.

MY GUY BONE ALL THESE DAY-DREAMERS WHO THINKS THAT IT IS WHEN THEY START BAGGING MONEY TO THE BANK THAT IS WHEN THEY WILL MARRY.
SOME OF THEM DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT BEEN MARRIED IS ALL ABOUT. THEY ARE JUST COLLECTION OF THEORIES.

Absolutly, but your futur wifey must be made that u can only operate within you limits; esle? Trust me, you'll be fubar(ed)!

Yes you can,but it depends on a lot of things. For instance, do you have the funds for the Church Wedding/Traditional/Court aside or support from people? Do you alredy have a house you re going to move into (not family/parents' house)?, what kind of lifestyle do you and your girlfriend lead? does your inlaws(to be) know your financial status and takes you that way? If you can answer to these questions are yes, then you can go on with the wedding.

My Guy,

Forget about it. Things have changed my man. We are not in the 90's anymore. 40K is good enough for u. Let me
just give u an advice. God says we should love. Yes, but god also says we should be wise. Love ur woman. Thats all
u need to do. Marriage is over rated. Live ur life as well. That 40k can get u through life now. But in 1 year, economic inflation
in Nigeria will destroy ur marriage. Believe me. Things will get ugly and marriage will be like prison with depression. So once again,
just take care of ur woman and slow down untill u come back to this forum saying "Can I marry with 40k while I have saved 400k in my bank account?"

Good luck.

jumie:

@ Poster,

Yes you can, provided your wife is very modest and is not a waster of resources. Also, you should have plans of getting a better-paying job and also get your wife involved in some kind of trade.
Marriage works better when the two parties are contributors (financially & in every wise).

Good point at the bolded,,,it also means in this scenerio that this guys marriage is not gonna work better because,,,even his contribution is meager,,,,,
I do not know ur Mr poster,,,,but if U re below 30yrs,,pls forget about marriage for now,,,let the girl go,,,don't spoil the girls life and children both of you want 2 bring into this world,,,another who can take care of the girl would come her way,,Anybody who tells you finance is not important in marriage is simply lying to you and might just be the Devil's advocate,,There is nowhere in Lagos that you would survive with 40k,,,even in ajegunle or mushin,,
On the other hand if you think U love the girl,,then both of you can wait for atleast another 2yrs to build and stabilise ur finances,,,and she MUST be earning something by either getting a job or be engaged in a trade

my guy shoe get size, it depends on the lifestyle u want, people r married with less than 10k but it depends on the life style,40k for some students its not even enough money.SO bro this topic was supposed to be posted btw u n ur wife not here where u have different people from different classes of life.any way good luck but eeeeeeh marriage no easyooooh

@poster, i dont think its a good idea, maybe a couple of yes back but cost of living in Nigeria today is very high, i dont think u ll enjoy it if u start ving issues with your new wife cos of finances, u might want to look for something else to support your paying job,

Well,everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion,but i wld like to be categorical about my comments (i.e)if all the barchelors on nairaland av to wait for their dream jobs and not 4getting the fact that if not all of us or most of us have 1 or 2 female sisters at home,what then become of them?LOL, and moreso,"HE WHO FINDS A WIFE IS WHAT GOD HAS COMMANDED"he cant lie if he says smthing he wld do it,but i think what most of us are scared of is the FEAR OF THE UN-KNOWN (i.e)what happens after marriage not really the money involved,if its the money then the question arise that what happens to couples who eventually lost there jobs immediately after wedding?Pls lets apply our faith with sense and allow GOD to prevail over smthings in our lives.

I agree that our country situations av deprive most youths of their future previlledges but we shldnt all allow situations to run our personnal affairs anything is possible,then let me ask all of us here "what do u know u will eventually  become by this time next year?"if anyone can answer that question with precision then we wld be rest assured that all things been equal our calculations are rigth, as to asking the GUY not to go ahead but in other words i think we all need to encourage ourselves,'my candid opinion'.GOD HELP US ALL.

a lot of if and it depends is what you will get here. the truth is, only you knows the true state of things. there are lots of things you have to sit down and calculate before you make the final decision. for my part, i got married two years ago on a monthly salary of #20k a month. my wife is not working and no one supported. today, i earn almost times 4 of that amount. it all depends on what you want. forget all the advice you may get here. your destiny is in your hands alone.

kunle75:

Well,everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion,but i wld like to be categorical about my comments (i.e)if all the barchelors on nairaland av to wait for their dream jobs and not 4getting the fact that if not all of us or most of us have 1 or 2 female sisters at home,what then become of them?LOL, and moreso,"HE WHO FINDS A WIFE IS WHAT GOD HAS COMMANDED"he cant lie if he says smthing he wld do it,but i think what most of us are scared of is the FEAR OF THE UN-KNOWN (i.e)what happens after marriage not really the money involved,[b]if its the money then the question arise that what happens to couples who eventually lost there jobs immediately after wedding?Pls lets apply our faith with sense and allow GOD to prevail over smthings in our lives.[/b]I agree that our country situations av deprive most youths of their future previlledges but we shldnt all allow situations to run our personnal affairs anything is possible,then let me ask all of us here "what do u know u will eventually  become by this time next year?"if anyone can answer that question with precision then we wld be rest assured that all things been equal our calculations are rigth, as to asking the GUY not to go ahead but in other words i think we all need to encourage ourselves,'my candid opinion'.GOD HELP US ALL.

The bolded question has been answered in previous comments,,,further answer is that,,the more reason the man should not be the sole provider of the family,,,the woman must be contributing financially,,,My advice is that the poster should not marr yet ,,,he should develop himself and positioned himself first and every other thing would take place

<sup>[/sup]N40,000 a month?
Without knocking it, i'll like to think that it depends on where you live and
how you commute to work.
Eg if you live in your home town and work a trekkable distance, then you might just
pull it off because you have no real expenses but no kids yet oo!! because im not sure you can pay for primary school yet.

Luxuries of any kind is completely out of the question.[sup]</sup>

U said it well

i see suffering ahead this marriage. Homeboy is not even sure of himself, he had 2 come cry in NL.

I think only married and experienced people are qualified to advise here. With due respect, bachelors and spinsters may not have anything serious to contribute.
Majority of the people who are against his marriage with just 40k are most likely to be bachelors and spinsters.

My dear, it does not really matter how much u earn.Like someone said earlier cut ur coat according to ur cloth not size.Beyond that u also need a very understanding wife who will accept u for what you have and learn to manage with you.Money does not really bring happiness.All you need for a solid marriage is the understanding.If you really love each other then go ahead.Remember the Holy book said "He who findeth a wife findeth a good thing".The good Lord will open more doors.

My Brother, is not really the MOney the issue so to say.Is the foundation of the marriage in God hand? dnt deceive yourself.If not dnt try it , but if ur answer is yes and u are so sure, God is ur source of income take it from me.He ll worked it out for you.Remember what God said about marriage and let it be right with HIM, HE ll care for you, You can marry not because of small salary or big salary.But physically speaking u can not but spiritually speaking YES U CAN,

YES YOU CAN

The Bible advice us not to live
on salary alone. Ir just just compensation

Moreover, it's God's blessing that one can
use to maintain a family not ur fat salary.

Forget wat u are earning and start looking
unto Jesus. He will supply ur needs


SHALOM

40k, it depends on so many factors, ur age, ur location, ur lifestyle, ur wife 2 b, manythngs!

40k, it depends on so many factors, ur age, ur location, ur lifestyle, ur wife 2 b, manythngs!

40k, it depends on so many factors, ur age, ur location, ur lifestyle, ur wife 2 b, manythngs!

ohisng:

If u cant live on 40,000, u cant live on 400,000. Its simple logic! Its not how much u earn that matters, what matters is how much u spend?  People live on 20,000 a month and they are happy! Others earn half a million and they still cant break even!!
If your wife is understanding, she go make 40,000 be like 4million a month

Very encouraging post.

yes you can, with good money management and helpers of destiny

40k is nt al that bad, but, if you dont have any savices dont try dat now!  you beta save a reasonable amount of money before you marry,  that  will serve as back up as ur 40k will be entering monthly till you will be lifted by GOD.