A duck walkes into a bar, goes up to the bartender.
bartender: what can i get for you?
duck: umm. .do you have any grapes?
bartender(looking surprised and finding the question odd): no, i'm afraid we don't.
The duck waddles slowly out of the bar.
The next day at the same time, the duck waddles into the bar, hops on a bar stool.
Bartender: hi, what can i get for you?
Duck: umm. .Do you have any grapes?
Bartender(a bit annoyed): Hey! weren't you in here yesterday? Look buddy, we don't have grapes. Ok?
The duck hops off the stool and waddles outta the door.
The next day, at the same time, the bartender is cleaning some glasses when he hears a familiar voice.
Duck: umm. .do you have any grapes?
The bartender is really ticked off.
Bartender: look. what's your problem? You came in here yesterday asking for grapes and i told you WE DON'T HAVE ANY GRAPES! ! Next time your little ducktail waddles in here, i'm gonna nail those little webbed feet of yours to the floor. GOT ME, PAL?
And the duck hops off the bar stool and waddles out. .
The next day, at the same time, the duck waddles into the bar, walks up to the bartender, and the bar man queries 'What the HECK do you want?'
Duck: umm. .have you got any nails?
Bartender: What? Of course not!
Duck: well then! Do you have any GRAPES?

DUMB RIDDLE!


did i like dummy another to it send rètard a like this reading time sweet your took you since.

(now read it backwards)

@poster
ur lucky we dnt have any cane
we for floag u for this joke

lol Chykason keep them coming

New and funny really nice

jessefly:

@poster
your lucky we dnt have any cane
we for floag u for this joke

not very nice pass jore poster you try

Chykason:

DUMB RIDDLE!


did i like dummy another to it send retard a like this reading time sweet your took you since.

(now read it backwards)

i can't believe you fooled me.
it's been a while since someone fooled me oh

in-fat . . .i dey vex

some cheeky but smart duck! . . .nice!

can u all give it up (applaud) the retard who did the posting

Gibson, my fellow retard.
I laff in Swahili
huhuhuhuhuhu

jessefly:

@poster
your lucky we dnt have any cane
we for floag u for this joke

rokiatu:

not very nice pass jore poster you try

abi ooo. I no sure say jesse don laff since dem born her

mykali:

i can't believe you fooled me.
it's been a while since someone fooled me oh

in-fat . . .i dey vex

eyah. . .sowii. . .oya no vex. .i go dash u my niece.

The Duck & The Old Lady
.
A duck walks into a pub and sits next to an old lady.
Old lady: duck, have you pooed yourself?
Duck: yes
Old lady: ok, go somewhere and clean yourself up!
Duck: i haven't finished yet!

Teacher to student

Teacher: why is 6 afraid of 7?

Student: because 7 ate 8 9

Remembering A Child
.
.
A young man was walking into a supermarket to pick up a few things when he noticed of an old woman following him around. Thinking nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally he went to the checkout line, but she got in front of him.
"Pardon me", she said, " I am sorry if my staring at you made you feel uncomfortable. It's just that you look like my son that died recently".
"I am very sorry", the young man replied, "Is there anything I can do for you."
"Yes", she said, "As i'm leaving, can you say 'Goodbye Mother!'? It'll make me feel much better."
"Sure" answered the young man.
As the old woman was leaving, he called out "Goodbye, Mother!".
As he stepped up to the checkout counter, he found out that his bill total is N50k.
"How can that be?", he asked, "I only purchased a few things".
"Your mother said that you would pay for her!" said the clerk.

THE DRUNK MAN

Two men were sitting at a bar and getting pretty drunk. Out of the corner of the first man's eye, he sees a beautiful young woman.
"I'd love to dance with that", the first man stated.
"why don't you go and ask her then", the second replies as he nudges him forward.
The first man walks up to the woman and says, "Would you be so kind as to dance with me?"
The woman replies, "Sorry, i'm concentrating on matrimony and would rather sit than dance"
The first man walks back to his friend dejectedly.
"So what did she say?" he interrogated.
The first man replied, "She said that she was constipated on macaroni and would rather shiit in her pants"

;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d ;d

Fresh and funny, you did well my son

Kunbee:

Fresh and funny, you did well my son

^^~here comes my e-mother~!

Chidi: what is that smell ?!

Jack: the woman next to you just yawned---

Chidi: <i can't believe that came from someone's mouth, shit smells like wetty feet>

HOLDING A BABY

A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said, "That's the ugliest baby I've ever seen." In a huff, the woman immediately slammed her fare into the fare box and took a seat at the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong.
"The bus driver insulted me", she fumed.
The man sympathized with her and said "Why? He is a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers."
"You are right" she said, "I think I'll go back up there and give him a piece of my mind."
"That's a good idea", the man said, "Here let me hold your monkey"

^^^^^^ hahahahahahahha!

^^^ omg ROFLMAO

Chykason:

^^~here comes my e-mother~!

My great son

BUYING CONDOMS

A young man went into a drug store to buy condoms. The pharmacist says the condom comes in packs of 4, 8 or 16 and asks which one the young man wants.
"Well", he said, "i've been seeing this girl for a while and she is really hot. I think tonight is the night. We are having dinner with her parents. And I've a feeling that I'm gonna get lucky after that. Once she had me, she'll want me all the time, so you'd better give me the 16 pack." The young man makes his purchase and leaves.
Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessings and they agreed. He started praying, but continues for several minutes. The girlfriend leans over to him and says, "you never told me that you're such a religious person."
The boy leans over to her and whispers "you never told me that your father is a pharmacist."

There were three strangers who came into town, unfortunately, they were arrested and were told they would be released only on one condition. So, they were told to get into the forest to get any kind of fruit they could find, Ten each for a person. After when they came back with the fruits, they were told to put each fruit through their butts without making any noise, then they would be free to go.
The first guy came with ten apples. He passed the first one without making any noise, the second he shouted, so he was killed.
The second came with small berries. He passed the first, no noise, second, no noise, until the eighth one, and he made a noise, so he was killed.
The first guy and the second guy met each other in Heaven and the first guy asked, "Why did you make a noise when you almost finish passing everything"? So, the second guy replied, " I made the noise when I saw the third guy coming with Pawpaws."

Hahahahahahahaha

person no fit put pawpaw for yansh---- hahaha!