EgunMogaji:
Only a broke man will be worrying about this.

Marry a good woman and work hard to make sure she never lacks.

Do you think Zuckerberg is sitting around worrying about how much his wife makes?

Povertious souls

You are always writing rubbish. People are discussing financial responsibilities In the home and you are shouting povertious. In America were pple are comfortable don't they discuss financial sharing obligations?

jagugu88li:
I beg to differ my sister.

The problem is we (all 4 genders.....females, males, gays and lesbians ) tend to go back and forth concerning family standards. We call on 50/50 rules then expect females and lesbians to take it like that. If you give a lady one resposibility that makes her look equal to a man, she automatically bombs the entire setup.

The munite you start getting promotions and you end up earning more that the husband, he automatically feels inferior and you my sister self distructs.

How about we let them do the job of providing. Catering for your wife is not a burden, no. As long as she attends to all her responsibilities.

From your write up you ain't married. Wait till u are married before you respond

CEEcey:


A husband that depends on his wife's money is a disgrace to men

My money is mine alone and I can only decide to give him if he asks

Besides isn't he suppose to be the head of the family
His money is ours.

Ole ...See her mouth.Kojo, our munmun don do.Kidding oo, no quarel.May be I will be the lucky one, so we share 50-50.lol

Maduawuchukwu:


You are always writing rubbish. People are discussing financial responsibilities In the home and you are shouting povertious. In America were pple are comfortable don't they discuss financial sharing obligations?

Thank you. I'm glad you enjoy my writings.

More to come, so keep following dutifully

ToZaraWithaZ:
Head of the family? What a joke! Soul mates is what it is called; you're partners - you met each other, loved each other enough to settle down together, then it is up to you as adults to come to agreements and decide on whatever works for you. There's no head since no gender is instrinsically inferior.

In the home, the one who is better at something should head that department. Marriage is not a Master-Slave institution, but one established on LOVE, FAITHFULNESS and TRUST, involving people who understand the meaning of what it is they're venturing into.

Where did you read it in my post that men should be the "head" of the family?

Nice one! I think a man being the head of the family shouldnt be understood in such a deragotary way though. I believe it means every institution needs a leader and a guide, just like perhaps a school or country has. And a hubby should play that role well. I tend to be a feminist but in the family setting, I would prefer to have a leader and guide for my family..

Urs is hers and hers is urs ideally. Bt like mtn says at the end. Terms and conditions apply off course. Lol

Thanks so much OP for this Fantastic TOPIC...it is worth more than a billion dollar ...A lot of homes have been destroyed simply because this kind of topic could not properly be addressed. While i am also finding answers. "Our money is our money, my money is our money" and what have us, it is all subjective based on the mentality of the couple, background, "location" etc. This is why it is better to take things slow when falling in love and understand each other to a major extent.

I read through all the pages and got a lot of points, while some were funny, some were very advising, and some were better off dumped in the sewer.

* Not everybody can be (or like) Mark Zuckerberg, we can only try our best(we have to be realistic)

*my money is our money, your money is your money, this as well is subjective and someone gave a perfect illustration to back it up (hubby earning 10 to 20 times as much as what wifey makes)

*my money is our money, your money is our money e.g. when economy and situation is so tight or both are making decent wages, they can support each other

*if you have a good man or woman, with full understanding, it doesn't matter who the money is coming from...This is what they do mostly in the western world (this is good, it is something we can adopt too).

*if as a family, the house is lacking something, wife shouldn't wait for the husband to come around before she gets, if she has the money(this shouldn't be a biggie) and in turn, if the husband knows the wife isn't really getting the bread, and she is doing stuffs like this, she shouldn't asked before the husband reimburse in excess (our money is our money).

*However, It is only right, we address this kind of issue, during courtship.....I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SHOULDN'T ONLY BE THE LINE BITE, DEEP COMMUNICATION MATTERS

like I said...It is all SUBJECTIVE, the prayer is when it is time, May God chose for us and give us wisdom to direct and make our homes.
(make we sef shine our eyes both m and f). Those that already have 'a home', may God uphold it for you.

Blueberrie:


Nice one! I think a man being the head of the family shouldnt be understood in such a deragotary way though. I believe it means every institution needs a leader and a guide, just like perhaps a school or country has. And a hubby should play that role well. I tend to be a feminist but in the family setting, I would prefer to have a leader and guide for my family..

You spoke well... But the feminist part though...

Immediately they got married they become one.
Hers and his are terms used to propagate personal ambitions and perhaps selfshness.
As for the lady that said that she doesn't eat people to think her husband made her, how sure is she that she is gonna succeed in the first place?

olaboy1:


That was the the best decision of your life. When you ask a woman what do you look for in a man, she throws out this endless list with caring and kindness somewhere in the middle. Now are you women saying men don't deserve caring and kindness also.

Guys if your wife or about to be wife is working and earning a salary, she MUST financially contribute to the upkeep of the family in the economy of today. When I was around 17yrs old or so, I questioned my mum with so much anger on why we don't get to see her salary at the end of month; I watched my dad tender his pay check and my mum would bring out a paper to do list for the month, I cringed at that one sided marriage set up and promised myself when I grow to get married I will never put myself up for this kind of arrangement...better not to be married.

If my salary can afford rent for the family in Igando whilst me and my wife work in Ikoyi, is it not sensible that wifey support the family so we could afford a place closer to the Island. And if she is not spending her salary on the family, then what exactly will she spend it on assuming she is earning between 150-350k.

I also believe if the woman puts her salary on the table for the family, then I consider that gesture as been invested in the relationship or marriage. I am so sick of the emotional blackmail that a woman would help me with house chores,,,wtf, what effing house chore when today it's very inexpensive to acquire a washing machine, dish washer, vacuum machine etc.

If I earn 200k and my wife earns 150k, she must provide 40% of our family expenditures, if she can't do that then let her take her bags and go back to her parents, because I'm sure she would pay her own bills when she lives alone anyway.

If I make 500k and my wife earns 50k then I don't need to ask her a dime, it's that simple.

On point bro.

GrandFinale2017:
will you shut up. Women are minorities and their opinion is like sheep to lion. A husband alone has the power of decision. Both The man and the wife's money belong to the man's control. Women are still slaves.
Thunder fire y'all feminists.
Cc goingape goingape1 goingape2 goingape3 misogynist2014

You need a revaluation of these warped values of yours.

Is this what you think of your mother and sister(s)?

Sholaystar4me:
Thanks so much OP for this Fantastic TOPIC...it is worth more than a billion dollar ...

What a heart-rendering comment.


Thanks for your points...


Trust me, i've learnt a thing or two and have added some ideas to my vault..


May God help us

EgunMogaji:


Thank you. I'm glad you enjoy my writings.

More to come, so keep following dutifully

You are welcome. I see you around the nairaland streets.

Blueberry ,and One Other Girl Made The Best Comment As A Girl. I Cant Share My Responsibity With My Wife,and We May Nt Have Joint Accout(i May Have An Account Named "family Issue" Where I Wil Pay In Some Amount Of Money ,and She Cn Also Pay In Money There If She Has Money To) . My Money Is Ours While Her Money Is Hers, Bt She Can Never Spend Her Money Out Of My Knwledge , Unless Is For Clothes Etc To Look Sharp. She Wil Only Be My Helper When Am Nt Stable. Bt If She Makes More Money She Wil Do More Than Helping Becus I Dnt Knw What She Wil Be Doing With Her Money.

stevejomo:
Immediately they got married they become one.
Hers and his are terms used to propagate personal ambitions and perhaps selfshness.
As for the lady that said that she doesn't eat people to think her husband made her, how sure is she that she is gonna succeed in the first place?

Yes, many ladies don't wanna hear they were made by the husband. A disrespectful and hurting comment...One that comes from a flawed understanding about life caused by insecurities and inspired by insecurities. In the end, it causes tension...How can a marriage survive when there's two different will inside of it, one stretches it to the east, the other to the west....


God help us

On a lighter note,the reason most lady is single is nt really abt the ratio thing but because most ladies nw re gainfully employed more than their male counterpart.d get favoured in sch,from lecturers,nysc,job interviews,u see them land lucrative jobs nd even small ones,in an interview of 10,ladies get d job mostly unless is a tasking job.they employ men.watch carefully,ladies don't find it hard in labour market,unless u choose nt to be mischievous.so most men who re ready to marry re broke. So d ladies who re gainfully employed nd re ready to marry @ all cost meet these men.nd when dey marry,her money becomes ours while d man's money becomes his.lol,but respect don't normally stay in dis kind of situation,cos when she sees she is married nd have kids,her condition changes nd she treats d man like trash cos she is d bread winner.so for men in dis situation,i advice u to exploit her nd stabilise urself bfor marrying her,so u can share d responsibility after marriage or u take it up fully to avoid stories dat touches d heart.(lol ladies am joking,dnt attack me ooo)now to be sincere,different people with different mentality,if u re a man nd u re looking for a woman to marry,with ur financial stand,u look for the person who will compliment what u want.women re of different mentality as stated here.u see some saying what d OP said that it's ideal while others have different opinion,so look for the one who have d same orientation as u.some women loves to work,while some dont,some men love dia wives to work nd some dont,have seen men who will ask the wife to be a full house wife.while some wouldn't take it.have seen a man who shares d responsibility with his wife.nd they re cool with it.majorly men should be taking care of the major things. Even If the wife is. Working but on occasion when d needs arise,d woman should be understanding enough to do it without nagging.marriage is about understanding of two adults,nt for kids.

banmee:


I agree with you on this. If she depends on you for everything she has no choice but to be submissive. If she want's equal rights, she must be ready for equal responsibilities. Personally, When i was single i never liked submissive women. Sooner than later you'll get tired of them. No fire. Just bland.

That's the point. They either stick to patriachy or take their feminist values to their logical conclusion.

The hypocricy and double standard is irritating.

kizyalex10:
On a lighter note,the reason most lady is single is nt really abt the ratio thing but because most ladies nw re gainfully employed more than their male counterpart.d get favoured in sch,from lecturers,nysc,job interviews,u see them land lucrative jobs nd even small ones,in an interview of 10,ladies get d job mostly unless is a tasking job.they employ men.watch carefully,ladies don't find it hard in labour market,unless u choose nt to be mischievous.so most men who re ready to marry re broke. So d ladies who re gainfully employed nd re ready to marry @ all cost meet these men.nd when dey marry,her money becomes ours while d man's money becomes his.lol,but respect don't normally stay in dis kind of situation,cos when she sees she is married nd have kids,her condition changes nd she treats d man like trash cos she is d bread winner.so for men in dis situation,i advice u to exploit her nd stabilise urself bfor marrying her,so u can share d responsibility after marriage or u take it up fully to avoid stories dat touches d heart.(lol ladies am joking,dnt attack me ooo)now to be sincere,different people with different mentality,if u re a man nd u re looking for a woman to marry,with ur financial stand,u look for the person who will compliment what u want.women re of different mentality as stated here.u see some saying what d OP said that it's ideal while others have different opinion,so look for the one who have d same orientation as u.some women loves to work,while some dont,some men love dia wives to work nd some dont,have seen men who will ask the wife to be a full house wife.while some wouldn't take it.have seen a man who shares d responsibility with his wife.nd they re cool with it.majorly men should be taking care of the major things. Even If the wife is. Working but on occasion when d needs arise,d woman should be understanding enough to do it without nagging.marriage is about understanding of two adults,nt for kids.

We are not bothered abut their money. I can marry a lady that earns ten million per month and won't even ask her fpr a dime. I grew up on the streets and no how to persevere like many of my brothers. It gets to their head, there's gonna be pride, selfishness and un-submissiveness.


We don't give a damn about what our wives/gf earns. It's can we marry them and have them to ourselves? Many men can't manage the pride that wealth instills in its owner, let alone ladies. This is the issue i'm personally concerned about. I can't speak for other people. Can the lady manage the pride, and still respect her husband? Not many women can be a Joyce Meyer, Darlene Zschech, Hilary Clinton, Theresa May, Angela Merkel...


Give some women some level of comfort, and their arrogance is gonna almost hit you below the belt. E do me abeg, tired of this society and how it impacts on people's mental and cognitive processes negatively..E do me...

This is one of the areas of scam in marriages that are now making people become babymamas

Maduawuchukwu:


You are welcome. I see you around the nairaland streets.

You're simply delusional.

Streets ko, alley ni

doubleportion:
This is one of the areas of scam in marriages that are now making people become babymamas

Blueberrie:


Then that means you've made up your mind not to even trust her before you guys get married. Either that or ur not ready to be self-sacrificial, which is what marriage is all about. Dont get married then

yes that is exactly what we will do,since u women can't even trust us with ur money too

Rukkydelta:
His money is his, my money is mine
And according to the Bible a husband is the head of the home. So he should be ready to take responsibility financial and I will also assist in arrears I can.He can take 70% of his financial responsibility while I do take 30%
We can open a joint in which I donate 30% monthly and he donates 70% that we can use for the family expenditure

What if your hubby earn less than you do, will you still use this formula?

Rukkydelta:
His money is his, my money is mine
And according to the Bible a husband is the head of the home. So he should be ready to take responsibility financial and I will also assist in arrears I can.He can take 70% of his financial responsibility while I do take 30%
We can open a joint in which I donate 30% monthly and he donates 70% that we can use for the family expenditure

and if need be and it's required you contribute more, won't you?

uk10:
yes that is exactly what we will do,since u women can't even trust us with ur money too

Trust you with our money? You be bank?

It should be both.

Visit: www.creativestudioone.com

supersystemsnig:





We are not bothered abut their money. I can marry a lady that earns ten million per month and won't even ask her fpr a dime. I grew up on the streets and no how to persevere like many of my brothers. It gets to their head, there's gonna be pride, selfishness and un-submissiveness.


We don't give a damn about what our wives/gf earns. It's can we marry them and have them to ourselves? Many men can't manage the pride that wealth instills in its owner, let alone ladies. This is the issue i'm personally concerned about. I can't speak for other people. Can the lady manage the pride, and still respect her husband? Not many women can be a Joyce Meyer, Darlene Zschech, Hilary Clinton, Theresa May, Angela Merkel...


Give some women some level of comfort, and their arrogance is gonna almost hit you below the belt. E do me abeg, tired of this society and how it impacts on people's mental and cognitive processes negatively..E do me...

u re right bro,thats why I said in such cases,it doesn't go down well in their relationship or marriage,especially when a woman is d financer.jst check it,when a woman drives on d road ndd when a man drives,most ladies on d wheel re impatient nd rude unlike dia male counterpart.one day one trouble.lol

this is a social issue and socilal issues are always subjective it all depends on how individual family wanna run it

positivetaught:
my own simple system is this, since we have agreed to get married n build a family together for our own benefit then we must be willing n prepared to work n sacrifice towards the success of the Union through this method, myself n my wife would each contributes 70% of our earnings to a family account to which we are both signatories, 30% would be retained for our individual needs,the problem is most men during courtship either out of fear,lack of confidence, or ego fails to be frank with women only to lament after marriage,women enjoys the benefit n success of children much more than the fathers I simply can't even understand this insatiable greed of women,some would argue is the responsibility of the man to provide for his household but would refused that a woman is supposed to completely submissive to her husband.

Some "feminists" want to have their cake and eat it at the same time!

They want to be "independent" when it suits them, and dependent when it's to their own benefit.

These set of female baboons do not give 2 shiits about values, principles and morality as they would want to have you believe. They're animalistic idiots that are after nothing but their nakked self-interest, and will do whatever they find convenient to achieve that end, no matter how contradictory, paradoxical and hypocritical.

Amen amen Amen amen Amen in Jesus name. FIRE

Next2Bezee:


C'mon go & siddan there!

A woman that is fully dependent on her husband is also a disgrace, na him born you?

My money will always be mine, but taking care of my family will always be top priority. While i also expect our family to be her financial priority as well.

May stingy & lazy women never be our portion, Amen!

no mind that teenager.

Am ready work my ass of, to be able to provide everything for my family(darling wife inclusive. Even if she is employed or not). I don't want to find my self in a situation, i would need to solicit for her regular support. But an occasional gift, an unsolicited assistance from a woman, will motivate the man to even work harder and do more . But on the other hand, if she starts acting selfish, i might want to withdraw some of my generosity . We don't want to be seen as a maga, even in marriage.

So, no joint account, but i will be willing to foot all the bills.

kizyalex10:
u re right bro,thats why I said in such cases,it doesn't go down well in their relationship or marriage,especially when a woman is d financer.jst check it,when a woman drives on d road ndd when a man drives,most ladies on d wheel re impatient nd rude unlike dia male counterpart.one day one trouble.lol

Thanks for the vote of confidence. To hell with their peanuts. I rather drank garri and eat bitterkola with it daily than to deal with such unrefined entities... I come across them on the road daily, their arrogance sucks.

They are all over the place these days evangelizing their horrible character. They can't talk peaceably or act calmly to a fellow human.

They see life as a product of their intelligence and don't see the need to act civil and well-cultured. Cocky, and arrogance. E do me...Who do they think they are anyways?

I don't blame them, it's guys that worship them for their filthy peanuts...

I'd rather not deal with a nagging,cocky,arrogant woman...Life is complicated already without them...E do me.