On My Graduation Day, The Happiness I Couldn't Find.

The Madness I Couldn't Display!


I'm now a graduate(just in case you don't know), and, life in school wasn't with no stress.It is a place of yearning, sweeth tooth, holding up and donkeywork, that is named University.A place of So many ups, so many downs.So many challenges, so many milestones.Many nights of no-sleep, many exams and tests.So many pretty girls I loved but couldn't walk up to.Life was so up for grabs.It was a uphill battle.Those times I expected "As" only to see "Bs". Sometimes, I fell sick during exams and could not read.What a day, when I was in the hospital for treatment and missed a paper.Those times love went caustic and the whole world was a cell.Those times I admired my friends' Ralph Lauren polo and elastic autumn pants but did not have the means.The pang of writing a carryover course with juniors.I remember waking up early to take my bath with cold water in the prime of hammatern.Well, all those times have fallen behind, they have expired in my booklet today. I have submitted a part of my history, and, gone are the days.I have written my final paper!

Isn't today worth celebrating? Shouldn't I be flying high and on cloud nine? Shouldn't I be walking on air? Shouldn't I take a thousand photographs, dine and wine with friends and neighbours? Shouldn't I whoop it up and kibitz around in seventh heaven? Shouldn't I pop champagne and spend money like a man? In the eyes of fellow graduants, there was no absolute happiness.There was no for real madness.Those who looked like jubilant only faked it.Those who looked delighted were not original.Those who danced were not actual. Some of them laughed but their eyes grieved. Some, in their quest to display legitimate madness, drank alcohol, yet, their lunacy was not 24 carat.Isn't happiness from within and not otherwise? The kind of happiness that accompanies being given a US visa was absent.The high spirits that accompanies the news of appointing someone's dad a minister was away.The euphoria that escorts being declared the winner of a pageantry did not honour our invitation.So many make-up our ladies wore to celebrate themselves, yet, the ecosystem was mundane.Why? Why couldn't I feel good in the flesh? Why couldn't my colleagues be possessed by beautiful psychosis like they just achieved something great? Why was that sense of fulfillment shy? I should be walking differently by now.My footsteps should tell a stranger that I'm now a graduate.But, I feel like nothing has changed! Because in Nigeria, B.sc is almost good-for-nothing.Graduates have almost no hope.First degree in this part of the world is a joke.Look through your window, see them pushing wheel barrows, see them helping farmers make heaps.See them carrying heavy loads on the street of portharcourt.They are hawking bread, they are hawking sachetwater and sweating like lagos.They sleep with empty bellies.They are graduates!

If we were in the good old days, when Corporate bodies would be in the running for young school leavers.If Nigeria was Canada or America, If I was a citizen of Paris, somewhere in France, I would have started preparing for today since January.I would have notified my family and friends since February.I would have got a loan from diamond bank to hire a car that would have conveyed me around on this great day.I would have bought for myself an expensive wine.I would have organized a party, where people would have eaten, and made merry,while I go write my final paper.I would have requested the service of a professional photographer.I would have danced like a prima ballerina.I would have been overtaken by sweet madness for few minutes.I would have bought an overpriced shirt for people to sign on, and, finally, I wouldn't have been writing this, instead, I would be somewhere catching fun!

Well,now that I'm a graduate, I will miss my colleagues and friends.I will miss my lecturers too.I will miss Tobi and Flakes.I will miss Vincent and Henry.I will miss school-life, those nights of tales and cheap talks.I will miss Tolu and Josh.So many people will I miss that I can't mention.Oh God! You've been faithful.Please raise for our Nigeria, selfless leaders, who would make Nigerian education worth the stress.Leaders who would create wealth and not just spend our common goodies.Leaders that would solve the nightmare called unemployment.Leaders that would rather die than watch things go bald.Hmmm..., To all new graduates, Congratulations!

Ayeni Faith Damilola is a writer, public speaker and eulogist.
faithdamilolaayeni@yahoo.com

Hmmm so true welcome to naija..anyway Congratulations.

A country full of talk talk no actions.