A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help - Family - Nairaland
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| A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by amliftedhigher: 12:09pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
Am writing on behalf of my friend. We were classmate in the university some years ago she was beautiful ,yellow and Tall . She has all the natural endowment that came down from heaven. She was dating her fellow student before the professor in the same faculty came to her for marriage direct. Initially she refused but because of the pressure, gift and money the professor was lavishing on her family to convince her to marry him she accepted. N/B while we were in school she was into jewelry business so the professor was not pleased with the business he stopped her from doing the business and promise to get her work immidiately After she graduate. We graduated in 2010 so that was the end of our communication because the professor forbids her communicating with anyone other than her family members or his own family members. Just Two months ago we became friends in facebook so the story begins guess what, she has not spend a week in their house with happiness since day one she moved to the professor house after traditional marriage. Beating, yabbing, torture and torment every day from the professor. It is quite unfortunate that she has not born any child since marriage. N/B the professor is a widower with the young ladies one married and one single. To make matters worse her elder brother that the professor use to fear because he has money is now very poor the implications are that the professor will talk to her and her family any how he likes, he calls the father on phone curse him for bearing her and other of his useless children upon that she is still living with the Prof. According to her since two months now he has not eating her food. He calls her nameS even on the road He curse her mother and father and entire family. Currently Now he brought out money for her to buy things for the house, she collected the money and went to the market only to come back and find out that he has locked up the flat and travel to his village with a different Key reason that she did not come back early . She slept in side her car for that night. According to her he has told her to leave his house in peace or he will make her leave in pieces. He beats her almost ones in a week or two. She told me that since they married, she has been going but she will come back when he will come to her villa and beg with her family members for her to come, according to her it is a routine for him to send her out and letter bring her back. She asked me what to do as she want to leave him final and travel out if possible but her greatest challenge is finance. She doesn't have money now even to travel to her village. The professor who stopped her business with the promise of paying her monthly currently give her 20k for food items once in a month or two. I don't want to tell a woman to divorce her husband to be on a safer side so I promise her that my advice will come from different intellectuals in Nigeria. Please wonderful Nairalanders help a friend she is in hell. She told me that there is no love again and that seeing the prof irritates her. I can't type all she said to me about her marriage here. Please your advice are needed. Thanks |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by delishpot: 12:20pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
Does she want the truth or she wants the typical hypocrisy answer people would give? If she wants the truth... She should leave and 1: Leave their home Get a job to keep her busy while he enjoys and wears himself out and then return back to her when he is worn out and she goes back to continue from where she stopped. 2: Leave his house and return his bride price and move on with her life. Hypocritical answer... She should remain there, get something to keep her busy and if he says NO she should submit and do nothing. Meanwhile she should start running post to pillar looking to invest the spell some girl cast on him. She should visit pastors, imams, babas, his family members, fast , pray, cook for him and his side chicks, fectch water for them to bathe, fast, pray, throw all her wrapper away, give him hot sex even if he rejects her, she should make sure 5o offer every time he manages to come home. With God, all things are possible even tho God never supports slavery or evil from one human to another. 7 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Memories12411: 12:33pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
Husband and wife matter is best known to them. This is just one side of the story. 4 Likes |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by amliftedhigher: 12:43pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
delishpot:The speaker of the House of representatives is a friend to the Prof, he ask the prof to bring the wife cv for job the cv will be accompanied with court marriage certificate guess what, the professor rejected the offer because he doesn't want to do court wedding so the slot gone. He would not allow the lady look for work if she mention business hmm he can shoot you but help her get work no. Give her money to take care of her self no no. |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by amliftedhigher: 12:45pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
Memories12411:Yes but as my lecturer, the prof is a devil in human form. We are all surprised on the marriage but everyone want pass the Man course so we mind our business |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Nobody: 12:46pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
She needs to leave if she doesn't want to die young. delishpot: Hahaha  2 Likes |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by fluxbush(f): 1:30pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
Memories12411:Why are you guys like this? When a female narrates her story and ask for advice, all we hear is ' let's hear the other side of the story because women are deceitful, bla bla bla' , but when a man narrates his and it is even glaringly clear that he is wrong, no one bothers about the other party and the man is encouraged to continue in his evil ways. If you walk into your mother's shop and see your mother crying,with bruises on her face and body,will you wait to hear what she did to warrant such treatment? You read the story from a third party and all you could come up with is hearing from the other party. I just tire for una. 3 Likes |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Agbaletu: 1:47pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
delishpot:The answer is right here. No more, no less. 2 Likes |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by keepingmum: 1:54pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
When shes tired and ready to leave, she ll leave....shes just a lazy lady looking for a man to sponsor her existence....people run from their homes to other places within the same town/city or change to another state. She wants to "run" to the abroad....mtshewww....person wey no even get tp to go see her family? She never chop brain resetting beating yet. Even if she leaves, she ll definitely return when he "comes back to his senses" and begs her simply because she is one of those women whom abuse is not considered a deal breaker 2 Likes |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by keepingmum: 1:55pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
X |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Drjudy007: 1:58pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
She doesn't need an answer or opinions, she knows exactly what to do. Only one person is being physically, mentally, verbally and financially abused, and she is still asking questions. Until she gets up, dusts whatever is left of her self-esteem and leaves, she will forever be where she is. Marriage is not a do or die affair, how much a marriage that isn't working. 4 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by jaychubi: 2:42pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
There are two sides to a coin, may be ur frnd is nt faithful or sth so we need to hear from Prof on d cause of this his ugly behavior. D story has been coined to make Prof a devil n the wife a saint. |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by jaychubi: 2:44pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
There are two sides to a coin, may be ur frnd is nt faithful or sth so we need to hear from Prof on d cause of this his ugly behavior. D story has been coined to make Prof a devil n the wife a saint. B4 I forget y is she still childless? Have they both looked at d issue spiritually and medically? A childless marriage is almost useless in my opinion |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Nutase: 2:45pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
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| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by SAMBARRY: 3:12pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
delishpot:you have said it ALL.Nothing more to add Iyawo prof  1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by amliftedhigher: 4:16pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
jaychubi:In one of our discussion I ask her if child bearing is the issue she said that the prof rarely complain of child bearing and both of them are looking for solutions. She had Fibroid surgery two years ago in India so since then no issues. Though am not close to her but I don't think infidelity is the problem as regards to her but the prof has too many girl friends which she doesn't care. I knew the prof he thought me, the way he insults PHD students hmmm |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Newboss(m): 5:16pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
When we ask them to look for a struggling guy they like and build a future with him, they will say that it's gold that they want to dig. There she has it. Oya, kill the man and collect the gold, "Mrs. Trophy Wife" Gold diggers don't deserve my pity! People keep running after shadows while forgetting the basic of life: PEACE and HAPPINESS! Billions of dollars in the man's account without those things is absolutely WASTE OF LIFE! Go for love, not money or wealth, they won't hear. They say they can't even fall in love when there is no money, that the guy without money is not up to standard.Tell her that I said NTOOOORRRRRRR!  May what befell her be the portion of ALL gold diggers! 3 Likes |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Memories12411: 7:24pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
amliftedhigher:I suggest you pray for them. Nothing difficult for God to do. |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by jashar(f): 9:23pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
She should take charge of her life.... 1 Like |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by OwoKolaChuks: 9:33pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
Tell me you're joking. Your graduate friend married a man who now maltreats her without an official paper. Madam that's suicide. No wonder, to the man she's just a piece of furniture. amliftedhigher:Newboss missed a point, there's nothing nothing to get if the man dies since there's no legal marriage. I think the man just wants a fulltimefuck slave 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by baby124: 9:51pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
She doesn't understand that not having court marriage and kids in that marriage is God's grace for her. She needs to take something valuable and run away. Sell the valuable item and resettle herself. She should not go home to her parents until she has settled herself and can repay the valuable item she ran away with. Her parents don't have her best interest at heart for them to push her into such a marriage. The professor obviously has many issues affecting him. She needs to leave quickly before she gets too old in this sham of a marriage. She is still young, she can still restart her life and marry a man more deserving of her. Let her not waste anymore time. I see she has a car in her name. She can sell the car and use if to resettle herself. This her husband has mental problems. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by bujebudanu1(m): 9:52pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
no comment cos am single right now.
but op which school did u graduate from?
is like d prof was incharge of the use of English |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Newboss(m): 9:52pm On Oct 21, 2017 |
OwoKolaChuks:Which point are you talking about? She left a guy she loved for some asshole because he's a "professor" who was a sort of "moneybag". She went after comfort and abandoned the guy she loved, just like most lazy assholes who call themselves "ladies". You ain't a real lady if you can't "build" your man from the scratch! That is called gold digging bro! What she's passing through now was not what she expected, just like most gold diggers. They all think the moneybag will keep on doling out the mulla .She didn't know that the saying that "One day, monkey go go market but no go return", is true. Ladies, stop gold digging! Rich men and boys are becoming smarter these days. Every lady should read the story of the relationship between McGregor and his girlfriend (or fiance). That's a real lady right there! 1 Like |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by SAMBARRY: 7:17am On Oct 22, 2017 |
Newboss:
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| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by sisisioge: 7:39am On Oct 22, 2017 |
I can't believe she's still wondering what to do... Biko tell her to buy fuel in her car, the one she slept in overnight, and drive to her father's house. However far it is. In fact, she can carry passengers on the way to raise fuel money. She doesn't have kids with him, he abuses her and her family... Issue has resolved itself biko. Let her go back home! |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by gidjah(m): 7:56am On Oct 22, 2017 |
This is horrible to d ear I must say, a prof acting like a retard! Anyways, I also have an Edo prof here too Dat behaves as if he drinks spirit ogogoro all day. A pastor prof for Dat matter always scattered and rash at speech.tel ur frnd to do d needful before d needful do her back.You also $mean she isn't legally married to uncle? How come o? Hu signed her out? Definitely she was Loaned out on transfer, She needs to return backto her original Club o! |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by Nobody: 9:02am On Oct 22, 2017 |
That lady is sitting on a time bomb. Its obvious proff doesn't want her anymore but she doesn't want to accept it. There's nothing legal even tying them (no court papers) so what exactly is she waiting for? Its better she gets out now that she may still be young or at least attractive. She can marry someone else, have kids with that person and also get something going for herself -a job or business. Her first priority should be to get herself some financial footing through job or business or anything legal. |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by 1miccza: 10:27am On Oct 22, 2017 |
delishpot: You've just summed it up nicely you can't be in hell fire and still decieve yourself into thinking it's heaven or that it will be heaven. She should leave as in take off or disappear |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by OwoKolaChuks: 12:01pm On Oct 22, 2017 |
brother you didn't even pity her. No chills [quote author=Newboss post=61649122]Which point are you talking about?She left a guy she loved for some asshole because he's a "professor" who was a sort of "moneybag". She went after comfort and abandoned the guy she loved, just like most lazy assholes who call themselves "ladies". You ain't a real lady if you can't "build" your man from the scratch! That is called gold digging bro! What she's passing through now was not what she expected, just like most gold diggers. They all think the moneybag will keep on doling out the mulla .She didn't know that the saying that "One day, monkey go go market but no go return", is true. Ladies, stop gold digging! Rich men and boys are becoming smarter these days. Every lady should read the story of the relationship between McGregor and his girlfriend (or fiance). That's a real lady right there! [/quote] |
| Re: A Disastrous Marriage To A Professor Help by amliftedhigher: 12:18pm On Oct 22, 2017 |
OK thank you guys she is now reading your suggestions oh. More suggestions please. Mod please assist by moving this to front page |
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