debosky:

It is risky - so called 'angels' can change into terrors overnight once you are legally his wife.

The problem here is that without him being a Christian, who will you refer to when you have disagreements that can't be resolved? Definitely not your pastor because your boyfriend thinks he is a hypocrite.

The fact is that you took a VERY wrong step in embarking on this 'missionary' relationship - they rarely work out.  

Don't marry him unless you want to run the risk of him changing and deciding you shouldn't be a Christian anymore because of his 'hatred' of religion.

I appreciate your age and the concern that it brings, but you (hopefully) marry only once and you cannot substitute that for anything else.

I think you should leave him - never choose anything above your faith, unless you are not really a Christian. A tough decision with the deep bonds you've formed already, but a necessary one if you don't want to take the risk of losing your soul. If you can deal with that risk, then go ahead.

Another foolish post. What stops a christian angel from changing overnight, start hating religion and prevent her from going to church and worshipping?

EVERYBODY can change negatively christian or atheist! If people are speculating the what ifs then nobody will get married.

As for the pastor argument, thats definately silly. Even some christian husbands don't listen to their pastors when it comes to their marriages, even pastors dont listen to fellow pastors. They consider their marriages personal. So its not exclusive to atheists

So what the hell is your point?

Tudór:

Another foolish post. What stops a christian angel from changing overnight, start hating religion and prevent her from going to church and worshipping?

Don't be daft - it is a clear possibility that he will extend his own reservations to her. Being a christian as a start point for both parties (i.e the same beliefs) poses a far better success chance than starting on opposing sides.

EVERYBODY can change negatively christian or atheist! If people are speculating the what ifs then nobody will get married.

Granted, but it is always better to start from a position of UNITY and hope that stays than start in conflict and hope for a positive end result.

As for the pastor argument, thats definately silly. Even some christian husbands don't listen to their pastors when it comes to their marriages, even pastors dont listen to fellow pastors. They consider their marriages personal. So its not exclusive to atheists

It's not just the pastors - the parents are not supportive either. If you can't talk to parents or spiritual leaders, then there is little hope.

So what the hell is your point?

Hell? From an atheist? Confused ninny.

You can't get the point, the atheism in you has rendered you unable to comprehend.

@ Sia Fuller.

God's word is our authority and here it is :

"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?" (2 Cor. 6:14, KJV).

i wonder why all these insults becos of person wey no believe in GOD haba why, not one person mentioned that the guy can possible change in the future. by his woman influencing him, and as she said he doesnt stop her or disturb her from going to her church activities. habae. no be bible talk say there is joy over 1 repentant sinner than a 1000 righteous people .

axeman85:

i wonder why all these insults becos of person wey no believe in GOD haba why, not one person mentioned that the guy can possible change in the future. by his woman influencing him, and as she said he doesnt stop her or disturb her from going to her church activities. habae.   no be bible talk  say  there is joy over 1 repentant sinner than a 1000 righteous people .

Change in the future, lol.

If you are a christian then God's word is your final authority and he has said, If I may repeat the previous verse :


"Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?" (2 Cor. 6:14, KJV).

You cannot say you are an obedient christian if You disregard God's word.

Sia Fuller:

I am an Avid reader of Nairaland and i have never bothered to comment but to enjoy the comments and advices of others i relationship matters but i think i now need your assistance before i lose the plot.

I have been dating this guy for a while now and honestly speaking without exaggerating too much, he is the most perfect man to me. He is tall, dark, handsome, hardworking and very kind to a fault. He helps people at will and takes no offence whatso ever at my excesses except i over do it to a fault and instead of getting mad at me to hit me or abuse me, he just walks away for an hour or 2 and comes back as if nothing happens. The only snag i have with him is that he is an atheist and doesnt believe in God whatso ever. [b]I am a very strong Christian [/b]and i didnt take it as anything at first when he was trying to date me. I saw it as a juvenile boy's thing and maybe misguided and my purpose was to date him to make him change his ways and believe in God, but instead he has kept steadfast to his belief of not believing in God and hating anything about religion but apart from that, he is everything a girl could want in a man or more.

Since i have known him, he doesnt smoke or drink or party, move around with unserious or bad friends. He has never cheated on me  and promised to never do so because its not his nature. He hasn't hit me before and also swore the day that he hits me mistakenly i should stab him and dump him there and then because he doesnt appreciate Men who beat women. He takes care of me and sometimes even cook for me when ever i come to his place. He even paid close to N300,000 for my hospital bills when i had a surgery and he stayed with me most of the time. I know he truely and genuinely loves me but this issue of his religion and atheism is my only problem with him. He has even driven me to church on so many occassions when it rains or when am going for Night Virgil but he never comes down or attends it and he sometimes comes back to pick me up when i am done.

He blatantly refuses to change. My pastor dislikes him so much and sees him as a bad influence to me because he says anybody that is not of the spirit and with the spirit of God is a temptation to be cut loose. My Mom doesnt even want to hear anything about him until he renounces his  atheism but she hasnt complained about him concerning anything else. My Dad has warned me not to bring a devil to his house hold and sees him as a Devil's incarnate and spritually unclean. He even promised to disown me if i ever call him my financee talkless of bringing home as a potential husband. Most of my female friends drool over him and tell me how lucky i am to meet such a good man while others warn me that he is demonic and i should stay away from him because he doesnt believe in God.

The thing is that he is very brilliant and intelligent and when you hear him speak sometimes he could be so mesmerizing when denouncing religion and the bible or Koran as mere propagandas and fictional works. There was even a day some people in my fellowship came to meet him to pray and convert him and it turned into a debate and he ended up winning the argument and making us question or faith back in a total reversal of roles. He is very unsparing and merciless when it comes to things of God, Bible or religion and makes no apologises for it. Apart from that, he is a total kitty cat. Calm, collected, mature, responsible and humble. 2 days ago he jokingly made a feeble attempt to propose to me  but added a clause that we would only do a registry marriage and not church wedding because he cant stand the site of the hypocrisy of christianity and the church but he would go out of his way to make sure i have a memorable wedding @ the registry and reception. He tells me that prayers dont work and only daft and lazy people believe in prayers. He says you don't have to be a christian to be kind, compassionate and honest and to help people. He says its human nature and the society that dictates how we think and act and he chooses to be someone that is kind and honest to people and not attribute it to one God or Church. Anytime i come back from Church and talk about my pastor or what i was taught, he gets very angry. He doesnt like hearing anything about pastors, churches, tithes and sermons but when you get into a biblical argument with him, its as if he knows the bible inside out and the right quotes without even reading it. He is that articulate.

For the past 2 days i have been in a dilema now. He wants to marry me i believe and i love him seriously to bits. I have dated other so called born again or spiritually filled guys in my past that messed me up so badly and i know alot of men use this as a bait to catch women and end up showing their true colors later on. My boyfriend is not disguising who he is in terms of his spirituality but he is offering me this unconditional love which i have seen and no man has given me despite their promises. My only fear is that my parents will see me as an out cast, my friends dont like him for it, my pastor and church members loathe him for being an athiest and dislike more everyday i am with him. If i go ahead with my choice to stick with him, i lose my soul and my community but gain happiness because he has truely being a wonderful man so far but if i leave him for my friends, family and community i might lose my prince charming that every woman dreams of that loves me dearly.

I am really confused and i have to make a decision quickly. Please help advise me. Please no nasty comments too i beg you. Hope we can be civil with this.

P:S: I will be 30 in September.                  

@ poster i don't think you are a strong christian. im fact from your post you've just made mockery of Christianity.
take note, what is after six is more than seven.
withe the rate of broken marriages these days. i don't think a strong christian as you call urself, would be playing this "marriage lottery"
dont you read the word of God? now see the kind of advice you are getting here.
II Corinthians 11:14 And no marvel; for even Satan fashioneth himself into an angel of light.
if you are a christian as you said then you should be very careful though i doubt ur Christianity.
i would have said more . but this tread seem chaotic. jesus said in Matthew 26:41  Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation:   this is the end time!!

Hey guys stop 'persecuting' tudor for unrighteousness' sake.

Everyman has a right to practise whichever religion or ''irreligion'' he so wishes as long as he doesnot force it down the throat of others.

@poster all I advise note ''advise'' is that you dont marry him.
the most consuming topics/issues on plant earth are religion and tribalism/nationalism.

Believe me If your clan(family, relatives and friends) turn away from you by virtue of you marrying him then ''I PITY YOUR FUTURE''.

But what can one say to dissuade someone thats in love.

What I feel for you is sincere pity, you are in a very serious dilemma. If you were younger I would have concluded that you are just infatuated and that with time you would realize things but obviously, you know better. Since you profess to be a born again Christian, I would advice that you pray and fast fervently for God to direct your decision. When you are convinced that you have an answer, go ahead with it irrespective of what anybody might feel about it, if God is with you, no one can be against you.

davidylan:

i really dont understand what the second line is meant to convey. What does it have to do with the OPs case? If you marry a christian and he decides to convert to satanism . . . huh? Is that the issue at stake here?

It doesnt . . . no one ever said it did. But considering this is talking about atheist bfs we're limiting it to this.

Why limit it to that? If u say she shouldnt marry an atheist then surely you gotta present an alternative?

So far ur attempts to persuade her not to marry have been mere conjectures, oh he might change and bla bla bla as if christians arent susceptible to change too. What is the guarantee marrying a christian who give her a happier life?

Do you really understand this you are talking about? YES Christ ate with sinners and thieves but NONE of those he ate with went away the same. YES Rahab was used by God BUT only after she had shown tremendous interest in following the God of Israel.

And what is your conviction that this lady isnt sent to help pull the guy to the lord? How are u so sure the guy will come out of the marriage the same?

What do those things have to do this case?

This is nonsense . . . you quoted the bible correctly for the first case BUT DISHONESTLY forgot to quote that the same bible also admonishes that a believer shld NOT be yoked with an unbeliever.

Paul was talking absolute crap there. Christians should take their bearings from christ and christ was heavily yoked with unbelievers. Christian means christ-like not paul-like

That makes no sense. the bible speaks about remaining in an unchristian marriage only on 2 grounds:

1. That both married as GENUINE christians and one backslid. Well you stay in the marriage.

2. Both married as UNBELIEVERS and one got converted . . . stay in the marriage.

However in the event that a single person is a believer . . . you cannot marry an unbeliever.

That is the issue . . . not all the dross you have said so far.

So what exactly is the difference in the three instances? What is the common denominator if not Unbelievers?

If instance A and B are allowed to be married to and be yoked with unbelievers , what stops and prevents group C?

debosky:

Don't be daft - it is a clear possibility that he will extend his own reservations to her. Being a christian as a start point for both parties (i.e the same beliefs) poses a far better success chance than starting on opposing sides.
Granted, but it is always better to start from a position of UNITY and hope that stays than start in conflict and hope for a positive end result.

Capital RUBBISH. Where is your stats to support this ridiculous conjecture or is it just to open your mouth like a he-goat and bleat crap?

Infacts stats from the US show divorce rates are higher amongst christians than other groups. So much for your 'UNITY'. I laugh

It's not just the pastors - the parents arenot supportive either. If you can't talk to parents or spiritual leaders, then there is little hope.

So people with dead parents and who dont gossip with their pastors don't get married abi?. . . , right

Hell? From an atheist? Confused ninny.

You can't get the point, the atheism in you has rendered you unable to comprehend.

If your brain hasnt been so addled by religion you wouldnt be thinking of a dungeon where a devil with fork and horns lives anytime the word 'hell' is mentioned.

2 days ago he jokingly made a feeble attempt to propose to me  but added a clause that we would only do a registry marriage and not church wedding because he cant stand the site of the hypocrisy of christianity and the church but he would go out of his way to make sure i have a memorable wedding @ the registry and reception.

a registry marriage is good enough, you do not need to do a church wedding. even if I remember very well. winner chapel , use to hold mass wedding in nigeria, to save people cost of getting marriage.

sister . If because of this statement , is that the reason you call him an Atheist. I am a christain and I see the church the same way. I have seen pastors who lie and cheat people. Even Jesus was angering with the priest because they were stealing from the tithe money and buy very expensive things from themself. In our days, cars and etc. Jesus called them  hypocrisy.


And if your boyfriend see this men, the way Jesus saw it , is not wrong. Jesus called them worst name. Only a  hypocrisy now adays would not see the church and mosque that way. It has become what people can gain from church or mosque member. People telling lies that GOd spoke to them for people to buy them a car etc.

Very few people see the church and mosque differently because those in power in the bodies are become no different to politician.

Prove to us , why you think he is an  Atheist.   Do not drop him because of your father, mother or pastor. There would never live with you forever.  Everybody have his motive. I know pastors who decieve congregation so that , they would leave, and they would continue to collect tithe and offering, so that they can pay thier own bills.  I know alot of pastor who are 419. So do not based your decision on Pastor but on the word of God.

The word of God is greater than a pastor word. You cant see a pastor heart. I know pastor with wicked and evil heart. Who are only interested in using you. It is the easy method of 419 nowadays. It is a legal form of 419, that some people use, because they can not be arrested.  The word of God should be the reason for your decision. Not what a pastor said.

So do not based your decision on other people opinion. SHOW ME, why do you think he is Atheist. and I would be back to reply.

I concur fully with @davidylan &@debosky. Kindly note that marriage is more spiritual than sensual and you seem to be on a lower spiritual realm in your faith. He being d head, I see you leaving d faith after the marriage. BE WARNED

@ Poster.

I will be blunt and straight to the point.

1. If truly you are a Christian, I believe you know that marrying this guy is a whole lot of risk. If you have the spirit of GOD in you as you ought to, then you won't be confused about him at all. Remember the bible says there is a way that seems right to a man but the end thereof is death. This guy may seem nice now, dropping you in church, doesn't get angry , etc. Don't be under any illusion that all these would continue when you are married. He only gets angry at the mention of church now but I can bet my life that mid-way in your marriage (if you marry him), he will stop you from going to church!

2. The devil knows the Bible. He comes across these days not as the monster depicted in most pictorials of him but as a gentle, calm, unassuming and caring personality. I want to believe that YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW THIS GUY!

3. You'll be 30 soon and i guess that is some kind of pressure on you. But I will advise that you tarry a little, listen to your pastors and parents and don't get carried away by one nice guy. I tell you, it doesn't last!

4. Pray fervently for this guy, get a knowledgeable pastor to engage him and if he doesn't change in 3months, LET HIM GO. You will thank me for this invaluable advise later.

5. Finally, no matter what anyone says here, the ball is in your court. Please be wise in the way you play it.

All the best.

You need to marry that rightous man lol. He sounds like a stand up dude to me but he doesn't belive in god. I really don't think it matters doe. There comes a Time when you need to stop living for others and do for self.  Your not a baby no more don't let people make choices for you.

Me sef , the only statement , she made is that , he does not want to get married in a church. I do not too.

Many people prefer quiet wedding. And if because someone said, he does not want to get married in a church, you call him an Atheist. Look white couple tend not to get married in churches. They prefer to use the money for down payment of thier house. While black people. Over blow wedding. And end up renting apartment.

Money may be the reason, the young man made the statement.
Bobo want save his money. That does not make him an Atheist. I hate wedding myself. It is too expensive for starting couple. dont blame him.

Look if you invest the money N800,000. In 10 years. 8 million naira. While the people at your wedding have flush it into the toilet. They just flush food of  N800,000 into the toilet,  in one day.  No blame the bobo jo.

The Bible says" Only a fool believes that there is no God"

From what you have written, I might force myself to say you love this man so much and also you are not ready to let go of this man to your friends that are waiting on the wings to snap him up and also you believe that at your age, it will be very difficult to find another prince charming.

My dear, you are absolutely wrong with the following reasons:

1. God that you believed so much will never let you down to marry somebody no matter good that person is and who does not believe in him

2. Your prince charming is not the only good guy without a fault even though you have fallen to other bad guys in a way to get married at all cost( I suppose desperation comes in here)

3. How will you bring up your loving children without his influence?

Think of a future without your loving parent around you( Loneliness will set) forget about friends cos they can never fill the space of your parent and loved ones.

Listen, you are taken this guy to be your god and turn off your eyes from praying, you just believe in his good deeds but forgetting that, he who does not have God in his life is empty and void . God is a merciful God that is why he is still alive and getting all that he has in life after all Wole Soyinka said he never believed in God but when he was in a dilemma he shouted Jesus Christ.

Solution:

Isolate yourself from this guy(switch off your phone, dont involve in sexual immorality with him or any other person), go on for fasting atleast 1 month and pray to your father, listen to him and to will find answers to what you never believe will happen. Dont think of him and God who created you and who is the Ability that can never fail, will answer you swiftly.

I love u sister

i would say you should marry him but problems would arise when you have children.  would your husband be fine with your kids attending sunday school?

i believe atheists should marry secular people while leaving the "born again" crowding to themselves.

Isolate yourself from this guy(switch off your phone, dont involve in sexual immorality with him or any other person), go on for fasting atleast 1 month and pray to your father, listen to him and to will find answers to what you never believe will happen. Dont think of him and God who created you and who is the Ability that can never fail, will answer you swiftly.

can't she simply take a break from the relationship rather than playing all these games. is it that serious to warrant 1 month of fasting?

P:S: I will be 30 in September.                   

no wonder the desperation. ha ha

You can't get the point, the atheism in you has rendered you unable to comprehend.

lol i guess being christian means you comprehend better.

It is extremely funny people are quoting the bible to justify their stance. How about consider her emotional feelings in this situation without the bible? Obviously it is clear where her emotion is and she has so far been very successful in the relationship with the guy.

A guy sincerely loves you and treats you the way you are supposed to be treated. Then when it is time for marriage, your family is calling him a devil I am hoping that you were able to defend the person that has been by your side for many days, comforted and attended to your emotional needs. Even if it is just to say he is not a devil he is just like everyone else.

Reading several comments saying the OP should discontinue the relationship with this guy because of a religious issue.

1. He is not asking her to change based on what she has written.
2. He takes her to church or wherever she wants to go, so he is not against her religious believes.

Guess what, when i started reading the OP's post, i was like the guy is me. Is she talking about me? Well, I am just like the guy she described the only thing for me is that i have not attempted dating anyone yet in nigeria because of the religion issue. As the girl may be cool with me without a religion but the eventual is the girl's family.

A major disagreement that may arise if you get married is, should the kids be into religion or not. I can definitely say that he is not going to allow his kids to be into religion same as i will do. Religion is a very complicated issue no one wants to face. I try to avoid it with my family. Mom asking hope you are going to church I just reply yes cos i am not ready to argue yet.

The reality is, you wake up in the morning you make your choices of having breakfast, showering, what to wear, how to get to work, school or go have fun. Everyday is full of choices. Why cant religion be a choice? Being a christian doesnt guarantee you to be a perfect partner in a relationship. Stuff happens. It is unfortunate that the family is already tagging him as a devil. Compare a devil to the description of his character the OP gave. Is that who you will refer to as a devil?

Well, I have had people call me a devil for not being into religion. I do not go around trying to convince people that religion is a waste of time likewise, i would like to assume the OP's guy doesnt go around talking to people about atheism. It is a choice that has to be made.

I have met people that have been persistent about me going to church. each time saying lets go lets go. And I am there sitting explaining that I respect your choice and decision, I have made mine so why not respect mine and not ask me to go since I have said no I am not going. No miracle will happen to change that.

Thinking about this, @ OP, you knew about his atheism, you are aware of your family's stance, and how deep they are into religion. I guess at the start of the relationship, you were not worried about what your family would think or maybe you were "praying" that he will change. And I am definitely sure you are worried about your age as the clock is ticking.  If you were aware of all these and more, why didnt you fix it from the get go by looking for someone who your family will accept? People like us will definitely find it difficult to get accepted and find partners. That we understand and we are cool with whatever happens.

You alone fully understand your relationship with the guy, your emotion, and your family. It is not your family that will be waking up by your side every morning. You shouldnt have let this come this far as I am assuming the relationship is more than a year. It is not all about you. So now, obviously you know what to do now. So you are going to leave him and say your sorries. Well, As an exgf once told me, time heals.


FYI there is nothing special in a christian that an atheism cant be comparable or supersede. Being an atheist is not a taboo. Assuming christian is real, how many people can stand up and definitely say, I am passing the test. I have friends that do all sorts of things that will amaze you and yet claim christianity. Religion is a joke. The amount of time people spend in church is ridiculous. Week day services, weekends, night vigil, prayer meetings. it is appalling. Why not use the time judiciously and develop your personal skills that will be more useful in realising your goals in life?

Atheists are not devils.
I can definitely say that atheists are more understanding compared to a religious person
I am an atheist

and

There is nothing wrong in seeking knowledge.

@OP to be realistic, it is unfortunate looking at the way things are now, you may lose out on a great guy. It is also possible to find the christian person you want to exceed his character but, that I doubt. You have a diamond in hand, now you will be throwing it in the trash because of what your family and friends are saying. I hope you will be able to find a higher carat diamond.

@OP: At first I skimmed through your post, thinking your guy is an ex-Christian who's having a beef with God. But after carefully reading everything in the OP, Im afraid I must revise my initial hasty post and firmly agree with Davidylan and Debosky. For the sake of your family and marital sanity, you need to look further.

P.S. You shouldnt have slept with the guy (I can infer you did). I believe that's one thing that makes your situation more complex. But thats crying over spilt milk. Get up, dust yourself up and move on.

Is he really an atheist or does he just not go to church? There's a difference. I believe in God. I havent been to church in years. 

I hope you dump him op. I would hate for such a swell guy to be with an idiot such as yourself. He really does deserve better than you.

In the end, in the middle of the night, when all is calm; what decision will make u happy? Make THAT decision.

the facts is that the Sister in question is not a christian too, imagen Born again Christian talking about how her numerous Born again brothers have cheated on her before she found this Athiest.you people should keep on deceving yourself in the name of Born Again christians.i have said it before that the spirit of true living God have departed from Nigerian churches long time ago.

You guys are wasting your saliva. The poster is tryna wallow in self pity and since the big "30" is just around the corner and she being so blinded by love and is desperate to join the Mrs group, she will hear none of your advice.

mallorca:

the facts is that the Sister in question is not a christian too, imagen Born again Christian talking about how her numerous Born again brothers have cheated on her before she found this Athiest.you people should keep on deceving yourself in the name of Born Again christians.i have said it before that the spirit of true living God have departed from Nigerian churches long time ago.

quite agree with u but not all

spoilt:

Is he really an atheist or does he just not go to church? There's a difference. I believe in God. I havent been to church in years. 

just like my family.
Becomerich, i think i'd prefer u in the religious section than politics.
@OP, just remember some people are extremely good at pretending. Be wise in ur decisions. It's either u convert him or get converted. The choice is yours.

kmtrddz:

You need to marry that rightous man lol. He sounds like a stand up dude to me but he doesn't belive in god. I really don't think it matters doe. There comes a Time when you need to stop living for others and do for self.  Your not a baby no more don't let people make choices for you.

kpom, marry the dude, religion , ko, religion ini. you guys just have to set some ground rules about tolerating each other, no my belief is better than yours thing. the most important thing in life is peace, love, respect and leaving a positive impact when you're gone. all the best!

This is very easy
Poster has made her decision as a careful analysis of her post would would reveal. . .
Ok check this out. . .
The topic itself blatantly expresses her motives

My Boyfriend Is An Atheist. I Love Him But My Family And Friends Hate Him. Help

Her use of extreme terms like hate in reference to her family and friends judgement of her man is subtle innuendo that she is unhappy with their treatment of him. she goes on to express all his good qualities. . 4give me but it's just had for me to believe that a man is as PERFECT as she would like him to seem, even and especially if he is a christain (just to prevent arguments from any of u atheists that wants to attack me hia).
it wont take any Freudal or Psycho-analysis for anyone to deduce the tone of her post

All I am trying to say is anything that I say after this will probably fall on deaf ears. . . she'll do what she wants, and probably won't take the advice of a bunch of jobless geezers (myself included). . .
So. . . .
Im gonna give it anyway  

As you have seen on some of the posts here, a lot of christains would tell you things like; For you to consider this your not a true christain, or the guy is a demon(like your dad), or you are a fool and all that. crap. All this If you are a christain, If you are a christain. . . dont mind them. .  

The problem with these people is that they forget that the admonishments Christ gives us are just for our own good not for some "I want you to just do this cuz I said so and if u don't your not obeying me and that shows you're not my child" stuff. God doesn't want you to forsake the gathering of the brethren because it could make you lose your faith, or there's a higher probability you might get into doing some other thing that he doesn't want you doing which could in turn mess u up.
Bottom-line: Any reason God would want for you not to marry this man Is for your own good. So you wont forsake your faith as his influence might cause you to, so that your children will have a less complex life, so that you will have a smooth life without havin 2 look over your shoulder b4 worshipping him and many others that have been mentioned by some of the other christains here. . . who knows how tolerant he really is eh?

The fact that you end up marrying the guy does not mean you are NOT a christain, it means that you didn't heed God's advice and preferred jagunlabi's  , and the consequences would be yours to carry. who do you feel cares more about you and wants to guarantee your happiness more: God or jagunlabi??   PS choose wisely

As for the atheists here. . . I just luv the way you take up any chance u get to take a shot at christains. . .
They are hypocrites this. . . they are hypocrites that. . .
You are the ones that attack Christains and say "God does not exist", then attack them again saying "you attack people who do not accept your stance" Ironic not??
Abeg think b4 talking. . .
I've never seen such a bunch of people waste so much energy on something they believe is nonexistent. . . Only a ravin mad man would see "no Ice-cream" and start vexing for the thing. .  
And who was that one that said religion is blah blah blah. . . U must be vvery silly to come out openly and insult yourself. Dont u know atheism can be classified as a religion??. Abeg berra buy dictionary b4 u come outside and start insultin urself in public. .  yeye. .

Davidylan i really felt what u said keep it up. POSTER pls am begging u in the name of jesus if at all you go to church to leave him because you wont get joy, the bible says that what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul, it profits you nothing to just gain temporary happiness. How can you want to compromise Jesus for a man who is not perfect, even if he has all those good qualities without Jesus then all that amounts to nothing, pls dont make the mistake of your life and the right man will definitely come your way

@OP, just 30 and you are breaking your head
In my view, there is one thing that is more important than marriage and it is my faith.
Which one is more important to you?
and in your view what exactly is marriage?
answers to these will lead to a simple answer.
You do not need to pray and fast about this.
All those spiritual jingoisms do not move God.

You are a playing with hell fire.
You as an individual should never think you can change him. Let God change him.
If u can wait for God to change him.