10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children - Family - Nairaland
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| 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:17pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Sometimes parents help their children too much. Adults can’t live their children’s lives for them. Our task is to help them grow and gain their own experience, and it’s important not to overdo it. 1. Talk for them It all starts with those happy moments when a small kid is asked, “Oh, what is your name?” and we, the parents, want to respond, “It’s Jason.” It would be nice if this habit ended once a child learns to speak. But no, we manage to give answers even for our teenage children everywhere: in stores, at home, and in other places. And what do we have in the end? We take from our kids the chance to answer for themselves. You can give a hint to a kid about what to say if they ask you to. But you definitely should never talk for them. https://brightside.me/inspiration-family-and-kids/10-things-you-shouldnt-do-for-your-children-448610/ Lalasticlala mynd44 What to do? Next time when you want to speak for your child, try to stop yourself. Let them speak for themselves. 1 Like
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:18pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
2. Be their friend Many parents try to become friends with their children, and they don’t want their kids to have any secrets from them. We can easily understand why parents want this, but let’s try to look at this a little deeper. What is a friend? It’s a person you can talk to on equal terms. Yes, you can tell anything to a friend. However, parents have a different role: they care about us and love us. There is no need to try to be very close friends. Let kids look for their own friends among people their own age. Mom and Dad are there for when kids need love and support. What to do? Say no to being too close in a relationship. Learn to support and respect each other. 2 Likes
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by obiorathesubtle: 2:19pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Mothers will avoid this thread.. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:19pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
3. Want vs need We know very well that broccoli is much healthier than candy and that new sneakers are more useful than dolls. So we dictate to our children (sometimes we hide it, and sometimes we don’t) what they should want. It’s like the joke, “Mom, am I hungry?” “No, you are cold and you want to be in a warm place.” What do such things lead to? They suppress a child’s “me,” their wishes, and their goals. Such things also lead to being a blameless victim or even a rebellion against everyone. What to do? Search for the needs and wishes of the child. If you need to teach them good habits, don’t do it violently. Do it smoothly. 2 Likes
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:20pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
4. Help them too much 2- and 3-year-old children can already put on and take off different clothes by themselves, wash cups, and put dirty clothes in the washing machine. More than that, at this age, children really want to do it by themselves. And what do we do? We dress them almost until they get married. We support this behavior with the arguments “He can’t do it!” We feed them, we don’t let them do it themselves, and we don’t let them experiment. And later on, we are surprised when a teenager is untidy or doesn’t want to help their mother. What to do? Let the kid do as much as possible by themselves. 2 Likes
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:22pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
5. Choose their tastes We often try to impose our music tastes, book preferences, and clothing styles on our children. It is with good intentions, but it diminishes a child’s individuality. And in many cases, it leads to a protest where kids do the complete opposite. What to do? Watch your favorite movies and listen to the music you love yourself. Discuss your idols with your children. 2 Likes
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:23pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
6. Count their money In every child’s life, there comes a moment where they have their own pocket money. What you shouldn’t do is interrogate children and try to find out how much money they have left. The worst thing you can do is check their bags or pockets. This kills trust instantly. Does it really matter how much money your son or daughter has left? Let them save for something they want. What to do? Teach your children to be financially successful, and let them do what they want with their money. 2 Likes
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:24pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
7. Choose their hobbies and interests Mom wants her daughter to play the violin and is ready to take her across the entire city to music school 3 times a week. And Dad wants his son to play football every evening. And parents often subconsciously try to impose a hobby on their children. What to do? Be patient, and watch your kids. Notice their interests and inclinations. Ask them what they like, and then let them develop in this field 1 Like
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:25pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
8. Take their successes as yours Caring “Insta-mothers” post a lot of pictures and write, “We have eaten!” “We have started to walk!” and so on. Of course, they support their children a lot, but still, these are not the mothers’ successes —they are the children’s! Who is “we”? And when the children grow up, things get even more serious. Moms and dads start telling about how their kids finished college and found jobs. And they do it like these are their merits only. It is easy to understand how much children hate this. What to do? Be happy for your children’s successes, but don’t confuse them with your own. 1 Like
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:27pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
9. Choose their presents When a child can already speak, they have the right to choose what they want as presents. And it doesn’t have to be another T-shirt or a toy that is supposed to develop them educationally. Of course, it is not always possible to let them choose. But it gives children the most important thing: the ability to choose, to make decisions, and to face the consequences. Such skills can never hurt in adult life. What to do? Let your child choose the presents they want. 1 Like
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by boman2014: 2:28pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
cool |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 2:29pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
10. Intrude in their personal lives This is especially true for the parents of teenagers. Kids have their own friends and first dates. It is normal and absolutely natural. An interrogation of “Who is that guy?” will only make your child annoyed. Many children will share such personal things with their parents if they feel safe. What to do? Instead of interrogating your child, let them have their own private space. Don’t ask too many questions if you see that they don’t want to share details. And, of course, don’t ever secretly read your children’s texts. 1 Like
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by Nobody: 2:42pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Nice post op 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by njideoby(f): 3:51pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
All these are easier said than done. May God help us. 2 Likes |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 4:01pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
1 Like |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by austin2all: 4:02pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Front page worthy. the mods wont see this wonderful piece now, if na bikini and bbnj them go rush post am. lalasticlala 4 Likes |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by sisisioge: 4:02pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Well done o OP...sebi na oyinbo children you born full ground. In this naija, you tell/show them the path they should ply until they are old enough to make their decisions. This is to ensure they don't didakuda for your hand  |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 4:08pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
sisisioge: I think some little adjustments should be made for the "Naija Version" African Parents love taking/making decisions for their kids. Especially in 'career choosing' . They all want their kids to be LAWYERS, DOCTORS, ENGINEERS. ...No one wants his kid to be a Painter, Artist, Botanist 1 Like |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by Epositive(m): 4:13pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
This list is strictly for the Ajebutters. |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by Evablizin(f): 4:26pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Epositive:Lol. You can say that again. |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 5:12pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by Oxster(m): 6:48pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
We the Ajekpako Parental Association(APA)says A BIG NO TO OP,if written again or seen anywhere else your Ass gonna be whop and you will also Receive A BAN!THANKS-SIgned(Secretary-general APA)
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| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by SAMBARRY: 7:00pm On Feb 11, 2018 |
Mothers can be very obsessive.they're so into their children that they don't realise when they're grown.they find it difficult to give their kids space and when the kids ask for space or try to set boundaries,they begin to take offense and start with the emotional blackmail or emotional abuse to have their way.that's when you will start hearing I paid your school fees ,I bathed you,I clothed you,I did this ,I did that and if you tell them na me send you to born me,you don buy market 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by jashar(f): 1:49pm On Feb 12, 2018 |
nice... nice... but na only mama dey train pikin? |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by Rosarie(f): 2:44pm On Feb 13, 2018 |
i have three angels.everyday i tell God to help me not to push them away unknowingly.i am going to follow this up.thank you 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by nnamdiosu(m): 2:21am On Feb 14, 2018 |
Shebi even in the illustration, its oyibo children that are they're bah? So no need for me to talk. Till I see mummy shakirat and shakirat in the illustration.....then I'll know you're referring to us.  1 Like |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 8:45am On Feb 14, 2018 |
nnamdiosu: |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by jaszplus12(m): 3:10pm On Feb 14, 2018 |
obiorathesubtle:very well! |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by jaszplus12(m): 3:17pm On Feb 14, 2018 |
RoyalBlak007:aaaahhh! I saw how interested my boy was about soccer and I did for him what my parents never did, bought him a pair of boots...I was shocked to hear the crowd watching him sing his praise in a match! thanks op for sharing this. 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: 10 Things Parents Shouldn’t Do For Their Children by RoyalBlak007: 3:59pm On Feb 14, 2018 |
jaszplus12: It's better helping a child grow his/her dreams. Doing what he/she loves doing best You're welcome Sir 2 Likes |
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