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Please keep me anonymous I beg you in God’s name.



It may seem like wickedness but I know I’m not – this is the only man that has ever taken me serious in my bloody life. The only one that is kind enough to make me his wife and my conscience won’t let me breathe. Tell him, tell him, tell him. That’s a conscience from hell, a conscience that wants to see me die an old hag. I can’t do that to myself.

I was in 300L in the university when my boyfriend then, got me pregnant again for the 6th time since we were dating. I had no choice but to abort it like I did in previous cases but I didn’t know that was the last straw. I went to the same nurse who did the previous, and she did it but the bleeding didn’t stop, went back and she gave me a drug to stop the bleeding and it did but I started having excruciating pains and my room mates, who couldn’t watch me die, rushed me to the school clinic. There, I was transferred to my school’s teaching hospital where I was given the bad news that my womb had been perforated badly during the abortion and would never be able to have a child. It remains the saddest news I have ever received.

I didn’t date for many years and after NYSC I started again but all the guys that came where all for the s*x and didn’t give a damn about me. Then, when I was about to swear off dating, this night in shinning amour comes into my life. He asked me to marry him after 8months of being together but my silly conscience won’t let me be.



Please everyone, I’m traumatised, what should I do, tell him and lose him? or tell him after the wedding? or not tell him at all Please please please help me.
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Hmmm. I feel for you. Any decision you make is good. It depends on the after effect you want. Over the course of my short life, I have imagined a lot and I have asked myself terrible questions like :what will make me one day want to kill my father? How will I survive if I'm crippled or blinded forever? Will I marry a girl I love even though she is HIV positive or can't have children? What will I do if I can't get a woman pregnant myself? All these questions were difficult to answer but I made a discovery... All that matter in life is live and die happily. A man's joy is not locked to anything but himself/herself.


If you tell him now,if he love you enough he will appreciate your sincerely and forever be more deeply in love with you for not deceiving him. He might also not love you enough and would want to let you go but at least, that will teach you that his feelings for you is not enough.


If you fear loosing him and wait till after the marriage before telling him. Mind you, no be concrete dem take mold marriage.. He can still change his mind and the effect on you will be tremendously dangerous. He can also accept you but fully aware you have deceived him and you might be the wife at home but yet,you are the side chick.....or let me say,house help.

If you refuse to tell him at all...He will still find out and your lies will become unforgivable and unforgettable.



So I say:Knowing fully that things like marriage, children etc are just overrated and will all pass and be forgotten just as we all will pass and be forgotten.. Tell him and brace yourself for any decision he makes after that.



Note/ Disclaimer: I be small boy and never experienced any kind of marriage. My comment is fully out of my own opinion and no marital experience.


Good luck.

Everyone does dirty things and regret later
. he will still get to know later so you make the choice marry Jim and tell him later then loose him or tell him and loose him now.

Who knows he might love you that way
. just ask God for wisdom

When u make the same mistakes more than three times it shows you are a complete mofo... I pity u not... My pity goes to the one who's going to suffer from ur past blunders.

Karma is a very sexy bitch... tell him now! and lose him, or have him for keeps. or No dont tell him, and lose him after he finds out what a wicked soul you are.

Really what u brought for urslf bby, u better tell him now that is not late than after, may good God see u through.

You will be worst than devil and bokoharam if you marry that innocent man without telling him this.

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So after sleeping with a billion men, you now want to dump that expired body on that poor man. Anyway I trust 85% of our men. When they marry you, and you don’t contribute your quota (ie opening your smelly legs and giving birth to legitimate children because that is all Nigerian ladies got to offer till Jesus comes) you don’t need to tell your family to return the dude money and food stuffs immediately

if your ovary is okay,you can opt for surrugate if he's rich enough and love you,but tell him.i feel your pain

How is it a mistake if it happens 6 times?
I see this often women who have had mutiple terminations most done badly resulting in infertility . These women sit in consultations and cry in front of their husbands when told they are infertile. The same women who have known about this all along , way before marriage. Deceitful in every way possible.

This man deserves to be given the choice to decide weather he can accept you as you are or not. Hiding this will not solve anything it will come out.
Abortion is not a form of contraception when will Nigerian women learn this? Using proper contraception is far better than dying from sepsis.

I still wonder why anyone would marry any woman that has not given him a child.

Children before marriage abeg. The way girls abort for their Bleep boys these days is alarming .When a bird learns to fly without perching, hunter learns to shoot more accurately.