OK this is my first time posting my story on here and I'm hoping people will enjoy it, here's a quick introduction of a term that will be used.

DNAS: DNAS are a short version of different types of supernatural being, D is for Demons(people who can shift into one of the twelve zodiac animals) N is for Non mortals (Aka Vampires) A is for Ancients (Werewolves) and final S is for Soul Eaters (Death gods).

This will be help once you begin to read more and more of my story, other terms will be explained by the characters
Also when the text is bold ed  that's its normal format. "Talking" is for talking, lol

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As the rain continued to pour down without giving any sigh of letting up a young boy let out a ragged sigh, he stared out the window with a bored expression on his face. His pitch black hair covered up his left eye but his visible eye was as green as a new emerald, sighing again he pushed himself away from the windowsill. He wore a simple black shirt that clung to him and a pair of faded blue jeans, brushing the stray bang out of his face reviling his other green eye. A loud crash of thunder came from outside causing the ground to shake, though the boy thought nothing of it and went to go find something to past the time. Yet even though it was your average storm it covered up the real action, a loud roar was drowned out by another clash of thunder and the flash of lighting weakly showed the true features of an angry monster.


"Leave this place at once!" the monster snarled angrily, two loud shrieks were heard before the intruders scambled away. The monster grumbled under its breath as it swung its tail in an annoyed manner before slipping soundly back in it shelter.

"Foolish Ancients never learn." The monster hissed as it laid down, resting its head on its forearms,"they gloat about there sense of smell but can't even sniff out danger."  Once the monster got comfortable its eyes began to close slowly and soon a loud snore escaped its mouth; it too was unaware what fate has planned for it and a young mix breed but at the moment all it cared about was getting its rest.

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Its kind of short but i really wanted to pull my readers in, please tell me what you think. Also i know my grammars really bad, TT-TT sort of sad but hey no one is perfect, ne?

Nt bad

Thanks!

ZakuraFlow:

Also i know my grammars really bad, TT-TT sort of sad but hey no one is perfect, ne?

A writer with bad grammars is like a lawyer without a tongue.

ZakuraFlow:

Its kind of short but i really wanted to pull my readers in, please tell me what you think.

. . .even with the typo at the begin which i instantly forgave you for, i still found myself half asleep as i read on, spittle collecting at the side of my half open mouth as my head tilted slightly on my hand which rested on my bed. My eyes half open, half closed a clear sign that i was far away in dreamland, knocked out by boredom, even there your mediocre story haunts me as i saw a neked woman with huge booobies, Her pitch black hair covered up her left eye but her visible eye was as green as a new emerald. . .WTF. . .i'm awake now, typing. . .partially arowsed. . .