A very close friend of mine got pregnant for a guy who've been looking for a child for years. . . She gave birth to a baby boy. The guy rented an apartment for her and sent her to school. The only thing is he doesn't care about her. Doesn't give her cash and believe me he got plenty of it. He won't marry her properly, said he wants to take his time. He went ahead and got another girl pregnant which was a shock to his family who disapprove. Now she pregnant for him again and he's acting indifferent. . . What do you think she should do?

African_queen:

A very close friend of mine got pregnant for a guy who've been looking for a child for years. . . She gave birth to a baby boy. The guy rented an apartment for her and sent her to school. The only thing is he doesn't care about her. Doesn't give her cash and believe me he got plenty of it. He won't marry her properly, said he wants to take his time. He went ahead and got another girl pregnant which was a shock to his family who disapprove. Now she pregnant for him again and he's acting indifferent. . . What do you think she should do?

Cut up her tubes?


Your story is contradicting. If she's is placed in a house/apartment by the guy - Surely, the guy paid for this place or provided that shelter in the first place?

Instead of relying on him for everything, maybe she should try and find something to do with her life? Seeing that she is now pregnant again, she will have to learn the hard way, get her life back together and learn from it.

By the way, how does she feel about abortion? Is this something she have mentioned to you?

He paid for the house yes but daily necessity its a problem. Forgot to mention he's a divorcé

ElRazur:

By the way, how does she feel about abortion? Is this something she have mentioned to you?

abortion is out of the question. She's almost due. . . She afraid if she leaves him there would be no other for her.

Okay.

I think you may need to let her realise that, she can still survive without the guy, only that things will be hard, and that is what she is trying to avoid. In order for her to really move forward and be independent, she may have to do things the hard way.

Why have somebody who do not give a shiit about you be there for you? It is emotional and psychological slavery. In my opinion, she needs to unshackle herself from it. But doing so will not be easy, she will bleed.


The other alternate view is for her to be the patient woman, and hope she eats a big fat juicy bone later. Something I am not keen on.

African_queen:

He paid for the house yes but daily necessity its a problem. Forgot to mention he's a divorcé

Is she not doing anything with her life? I think in a relationship, both sides should contribute. As a man, I do not want liability - trust me on this. It will be nice for a woman to be able to do something too you know.

I don't know the guy, but he probably feels she should be able to do a few things for herself.

African_queen:

A very close friend of mine got pregnant for a guy who've been looking for a child for years. . . She gave birth to a baby boy. The guy rented an apartment for her and sent her to school. The only thing is he doesn't care about her. Doesn't give her cash and believe me he got plenty of it. He won't marry her properly, said he wants to take his time. He went ahead and got another girl pregnant which was a shock to his family who disapprove. Now she pregnant for him again and he's acting indifferent. . . What do you think she should do?

Very sad story, but the guy seems to have done quite a bit for her.

He's paid for her education that's a very big thing, he's also paying for her accommodation.

Your friend is now educated , so if it's possible, after the birth of  her 2ND child she should find employment.

Does she have family she can leave her kids with while she goes out to work?

It's sad, but if she lived in the UK she would get help with  child care.

ElRazur:

Is she not doing anything with her life? I think in a relationship, both sides should contribute. As a man, I do not want liability - trust me on this. It will be nice for a woman to be able to do something too you know.

I don't know the guy, but he probably feels she should be able to do a few things for herself.

she had her own biz before she met him. . . A laundry shop. He told her to stop cos it a majority of men that patronize.

African_queen:

she had her own biz before she met him. . . A laundry shop. He told her to stop cos it a majority of men that patronize.

No offence, but she is dumber than I previously thought.

How the hell do you listen to someone on that kind of thing? If any woman in similar situation is reading, let this be a lesson.

ElRazur:

No offence, but she is dumber than I previously thought.

How the hell do you listen to someone on that kind of thing? If any woman in similar situation is reading, let this be a lesson.

she was in love

African_queen:

she was in love

More reason why I think she is dumb.

Being in love do not remove one's common sense on certain issue in my opinion.

Look, my words may be harsh, but she needs to get her life together again and fast.

ElRazur:

More reason why I think she is dumb.

Being in love do not remove one's common sense on certain issue in my opinion.

Look, my words may be harsh, but she needs to get her life together again and fast.

she's confused. She wants to start a biz d guy refused to finance her. She said work is out of the question cos of her kids. I don't know what else to tell her. . . She don't have a dime to her name which is very dangerous. . . Nobody knows tomorrow.

She needs to help herself.
Maybe go back to her buz,and stop expecting too much from the man.
Again getting pregnant the second time from a man that has not married her,what waz she thinking?

fubiluv:

She needs to help herself.
Maybe go back to her buz,and stop expecting too much from the man.
Again getting pregnant the second time from a man that has not married her,what waz she thinking?

Don't mind the dumb woman

African_queen:

. I don't know what else to tell her. . .

Print this thread and send it to her?

Email this thread to her?

What ever it is you do, just make sure this thread gets to her. The message is loud and clear enough - Fix your life.

African_queen:

she's confused. She wants to start a biz d guy refused to finance her. She said work is out of the question cos of her kids. I don't know what else to tell her. . . She don't have a dime to her name which is very dangerous. . . Nobody knows tomorrow.

What kind of business does she want to start?

How will she run it if "work is out of the question because of the kids" ?


She should look for a business partner,financial backer or maybe she should try to get a mircoloan.

African_queen:

A very close friend of mine got pregnant for a guy who've been looking for a child for years. . . She gave birth to a baby boy. The guy rented an apartment for her and sent her to school. The only thing is he doesn't care about her. Doesn't give her cash and believe me he got plenty of it. He won't marry her properly, said he wants to take his time. He went ahead and got another girl pregnant which was a shock to his family who disapprove. Now she pregnant for him again and he's acting indifferent. . . What do you think she should do?

 may be i'm slow, but why did she have the second child with him, if he'd already got another lady pregnant. wasn't she scared of aids, or rich people don't get it.

he sent her to school to better herself so that she can take care of herself and the babe, she goes and gets knocked up, for a guy who couldn't be bothered, but it makes sense if she didn't want mixed vegetables. or whas she thinking he'd marry her now that she's got two kids instead of one, that the other woman has,

my take, tell her to pack her bags, go back home and start afresh. she can sublet the apartment for extra cash if she needs to,

the guy isnt a responsible man but i guess that much is obvious.There are men like that he may feel he owns her and as such have taken her for granted to be a single parent for a guy with two kids cannot be easy i feel for her but your frend must at once start hunting  for a job to be self sufficient is something she must aspire for lucky her she has some form of education she must stand on her two feet so as to raise the two kids properly no need crying over something she cannot reverse.Since she is not married who knws what the future holds tell her to keep her head up.

Ask every married couple d will give u d same story. stupid guys are like dat, 7-10 marriages same story.

she better start preparing for self dependence.

ElRazur:

Print this threat and send it to her?

Email this thread to her?

What ever it is you do, just make sure this thread gets to her. The message is loud and clear enough - Fix your life.

you are a wonderfull person, just that u refuse to fix ur pics in your profile.

^^^

Beautiful you

Hectic got no words for this

African_queen:

she was in love

In love with d wrong guy. .anyways,it's not d end of d world.
God will direct u if u get closer 2 him. . talk 2 him.
Never be deceived by men words . .He's must have promised u marriage!nor b 2day!
Move on and keep a clean heart. .hopefully,things go better.

This is what happens when women are blinded by money you tend to accept rubbish in your life. how can a grown person hook up with someone who "has been looking for a child" What is she a surrogate? she obviously knew the guy is a playboy and he obviously wanted nothing from her other than the fact that he can bed her when ever he wants to and stupidly she thinks she will be financially secured because he has money. Some people shaa. shame on the guy for getting another woman pregnant and shame on the girl for opening up her leg again after she found out he had another woman pregnant then had the nerve to not use protection geez

^^Will they ever learn?

See why mothers tell girls to hook up with guys that like them more than they like him? It's so she can decide what's best for her that they (the couple) should do.

This rich guy just has too much control or the girls involved seem to think having his baby will make him commit to them.

Make dem dey dey born for am, at the end of the day chic wey strong go marry the boy and none of those kids go see him house.

What's there to do than to work and take care of Ur kids and stop waiting for the guy to marry U.

Una dey worry sometimes o.

When you give advice to some people they'll think you don't know nothing. . . Or you're too young to know stuff or you're just jealous. . . But then u keep on giving advice after all what re friends for?