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My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do - Family (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do (76493 Views)

Should I Allow My Mother-in-law In Our Home? I Need Advice / My Younger Sister Has This Entitlement Mentality. Help I'm Scared For Her. / My Sister Has Gone Out Of Control (2) (3) (4)

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Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Enufo: 10:58pm On Jun 01, 2018
That lady don't have shame at all, how can I go and stay under my younger sister and husband? this is unlike African, she don't suppose to know how ur matrimonial bed look like talk more of sleeping in it, my own advise just tell her calmly sister u are inconveniencing me and my wife, nothing wrong in expressing your feeling.

1 Like

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Rhea(f): 10:59pm On Jun 01, 2018
alimaa:
I know i am supposed to post this in the family section but i always get better response from the Romance section. I don't know whether any of you has been in a situation where an in-law comes for a short visit and finally settles in your home without any sign of leaving anytime soon.

My wife's elder sister who is single came to visit us in January but up till now she has not made any move to go and it's not as if we live in a big apartment so there is no much privacy. We got married in 2015 so our union is still young.

This kind of situation puts one in a dilemma because you just don't know what to say and you will be termed "a bad person". She lies on our matrimonial bed even in my presence.

Before now i never knew someone would feel comfortable staying with a younger sister in her matrimonial home. If it is as a result of accommodation problem or maybe you went to a distant location to do one or two things and you now spend sometime in your younger sister's home, that is understandable.

Please what advice do you have for me?

Unfortunately, your wife has no powers here. It must have to do with the way they were raised. She must have been an overpowering big sister, otherwise your wife would have sent her packing after 2 weeks. It is time you stepped up to the plate and tell her to pack her stuff and hit the road. If your wife objects, then pack her bag as well.

3 Likes

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Ojuororun(m): 11:02pm On Jun 01, 2018
MY OWN ADVICE IS... YOU MARRY HER TOO. ABI smiley

2 Likes

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by chuberg(m): 11:02pm On Jun 01, 2018
alimaa:
I know i am supposed to post this in the family section but i always get better response from the Romance section. I don't know whether any of you has been in a situation where an in-law comes for a short visit and finally settles in your home without any sign of leaving anytime soon.

My wife's elder sister who is single came to visit us in January but up till now she has not made any move to go and it's not as if we live in a big apartment so there is no much privacy. We got married in 2015 so our union is still young.

This kind of situation puts one in a dilemma because you just don't know what to say and you will be termed "a bad person". She lies on our matrimonial bed even in my presence.

Before now i never knew someone would feel comfortable staying with a younger sister in her matrimonial home. If it is as a result of accommodation problem or maybe you went to a distant location to do one or two things and you now spend sometime in your younger sister's home, that is understandable.

Please what advice do you have for me?


My dear brother ndewo, my advice to you is this...... take the bull by the horn, tell your wife to tell her sister to leave your house that you no longer feel comfortable again in your house. If she refuse, tell her by yourself to leave your house that your marriage is still at the primary stage that your still bonding. If you don't do this now, you risk your marriage crumbling and you don't want that. This is what the teach in the marriage course and is also written in the Bible...... The man shall leave his parents wife and be join to his wife, but here in Nigeria we keep disobeying that order.

You might find it difficult to do but you are saving your marriage. If you don't take the bold step now, she will help your wife to grow wings and before you know it both of you will be captains in one ship...

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Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by hush15: 11:04pm On Jun 01, 2018
[quote author=alimaa post=68083146] I don't know anyone to report to, her stay has increased my daily expenses.[/quote

dude, no vex me o. if you uncomfortable and your wife no get sense, go and sleep in a friends house. By the time you do am for a week, am very sure the right questions and answers will start popping up

2 Likes

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by johnunor47: 11:05pm On Jun 01, 2018
If she is a liability in your in home sent her parking

1 Like

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by CanineOfJackal: 11:05pm On Jun 01, 2018
ImaIma1:


2hrs
A neighbor died when coming back from work within that 2hr difference from a stray bullet during a robbery
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Nobody: 11:06pm On Jun 01, 2018
Best advice so far? I won't allow ANYONE to make me unnecessarily uncomfortable in my own house (not even my parents), unless on health grounds or if one of them is dead and it becomes necessary to house the one still alive.
Archangel15:
Man up and tell YOUR wife's sister to leave YOUR house

1 Like

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by millionboi2: 11:07pm On Jun 01, 2018
alimaa:
I know i am supposed to post this in the family section but i always get better response from the Romance section. I don't know whether any of you has been in a situation where an in-law comes for a short visit and finally settles in your home without any sign of leaving anytime soon.

My wife's elder sister who is single came to visit us in January but up till now she has not made any move to go and it's not as if we live in a big apartment so there is no much privacy. We got married in 2015 so our union is still young.

This kind of situation puts one in a dilemma because you just don't know what to say and you will be termed "a bad person". She lies on our matrimonial bed even in my presence.

Before now i never knew someone would feel comfortable staying with a younger sister in her matrimonial home. If it is as a result of accommodation problem or maybe you went to a distant location to do one or two things and you now spend sometime in your younger sister's home, that is understandable.

Please what advice do you have for me?
oga if u have money rent a bigger apartment and have ur own room wie ur wife can always come to u when ever u need her. Except if she is influencin ur wife negatively,u lack d right to send her away. D day u asked d hand of her sister in marriage ur married d whole family.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by mercyway: 11:07pm On Jun 01, 2018
SalamRushdie:
One of the disadvantages of marrying from a family that hasn't found it's feet financially .
and an illiterate. No literate fellow will act like his sister in law.

5 Likes

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by AreaFada2: 11:07pm On Jun 01, 2018
alimaa:
i have not discussed it with my wife yet because i don't know how she would feel.

Look, you have no business coming here for advise until you have sounded out your wife. I presume you dated her for a while and now married for 3 years. You should know her temperament, relationship with this sister/family and how much common sense she has.

You also have no business talking to your sister-in-law. You should be telling your wife how it affects your privacy with her. Ask her why she has stayed this long.

It appears to me your wife thinks it's ok. Or shy/reluctant to discuss it with you. Your wife ought to know that visiting & staying that long without seeking your consent is not cool.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Nobody: 11:08pm On Jun 01, 2018
This your in-law is as clueless as one person of minegrin
Their thinking sense is blunttongue
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Nobody: 11:08pm On Jun 01, 2018
Some women gat no shame sha....tufia

1 Like

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by bixton(m): 11:09pm On Jun 01, 2018
alimaa:
I know i am supposed to post this in the family section but i always get better response from the Romance section. I don't know whether any of you has been in a situation where an in-law comes for a short visit and finally settles in your home without any sign of leaving anytime soon.

My wife's elder sister who is single came to visit us in January but up till now she has not made any move to go and it's not as if we live in a big apartment so there is no much privacy. We got married in 2015 so our union is still young.

This kind of situation puts one in a dilemma because you just don't know what to say and you will be termed "a bad person". She lies on our matrimonial bed even in my presence.

Before now i never knew someone would feel comfortable staying with a younger sister in her matrimonial home. If it is as a result of accommodation problem or maybe you went to a distant location to do one or two things and you now spend sometime in your younger sister's home, that is understandable.

Please what advice do you have for me?

She came since January doing what?
What were you told before she came to stay?
What is your wife saying about it?
Abi you want marry the elder sister ?


You come dey ask us for advice, maybe you never even tell your own people
Do that which your mind tells you.

If na house rent matter, assist in paying a 1 year house rent for her and let her continue from there.
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by dannyjr1(m): 11:11pm On Jun 01, 2018
hmmm
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by brookz: 11:11pm On Jun 01, 2018
Meanwhile, in my own Case Ehn..........

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by friendl: 11:12pm On Jun 01, 2018
Anyone can stay with anybody but there should be a form of agreement(if her sister will stay a month ,a year e.tc) ,your wife is the cause of everything ,she have no regard for you ,her marriage or her privacy ,truth is always bitter ,..

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Alva2018: 11:12pm On Jun 01, 2018
Wahala dey oh
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by MrMcJay(m): 11:13pm On Jun 01, 2018
Very simple solution.

1 Go to Oyingbo market and buy a big bag of unpeeled egusi.

2 When next you're going to work, say something like 'Aunty Chizoba, now that you're here, help me peel small egusi make we make small soup when I come".

3 Use paint rubber and pack a heavy heap of egusi in front of her let her peel.

Step out of the house, wear a smile and see what God will do.

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Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by friendl: 11:14pm On Jun 01, 2018
[quote author=millionboi2 post=68098210]oga if u have money rent a bigger apartment and have ur own room wie ur wife can always come to u when ever u need her. Except if she is influencin ur wife negatively,u lack d right to send her away. D day u asked d hand of her sister in marriage ur married d whole family. [/quot

You said a lot of rubbish

9 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by InvertedHammer: 11:14pm On Jun 01, 2018
alimaa:
I know i am supposed to post this in the family section but i always get better response from the Romance section. I don't know whether any of you has been in a situation where an in-law comes for a short visit and finally settles in your home without any sign of leaving anytime soon.

My wife's elder sister who is single came to visit us in January but up till now she has not made any move to go and it's not as if we live in a big apartment so there is no much privacy. We got married in 2015 so our union is still young.

This kind of situation puts one in a dilemma because you just don't know what to say and you will be termed "a bad person". She lies on our matrimonial bed even in my presence.

Before now i never knew someone would feel comfortable staying with a younger sister in her matrimonial home. If it is as a result of accommodation problem or maybe you went to a distant location to do one or two things and you now spend sometime in your younger sister's home, that is understandable.

Please what advice do you have for me?

/
Do you pray together before sleep?

When it is your time to pray, add these lines to your prayer:
"What God has joined together, let no man put asunder. All the family members that come to disturb my marriage...they come, dem no wan leave...hoooly ghooost fire!". Garnish the prayer with some speaking in tongue.

She will be shaken. Later your wife will ask you about the prayer points. Tell her that it is an innocent and harmless prayer. Your in-law will definitely move.

*/

1 Like 1 Share

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by ihekachibuike: 11:14pm On Jun 01, 2018
this is really a big situation ooo
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by ndwork: 11:15pm On Jun 01, 2018
donstan18:
Kindly bring any 3 of your relatives from your village to join you there, let's see if she'll complain.

She'll quickly be the one to find a solution to spark back the marital privacy of your marriage.


Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by smileysmiley(f): 11:15pm On Jun 01, 2018
Wake up in the middle of the night and wake your wife up. Tell her you're going to meet her sister. When she asks why, tell her to perform your marital duties that you cannot have two women in the house and leave one unsatisfied, it's not done.

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Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by crislyn(f): 11:16pm On Jun 01, 2018
kimbraa:
If you ask her to leave, you become an enemy, and if your wife who happens to be her younger sister should ask her to leave, she'd assume your wife is being disrespectful to her because she's married and she's not. Tell your wife to explain the situation to her mother or someone older to call her back and give you guys space.
You are wise.

1 Like

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Ibrahim505(m): 11:16pm On Jun 01, 2018
The simple practical idea is this:
Start trying to have an intimate relationship with the stranger, cuddle and be romantic with her in the presence of your wife. By treating her like your second wife you will be amazed how the first wife will instantly makes her to relocate.

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Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Nice123(m): 11:18pm On Jun 01, 2018
Oga ask her to leave una. Otherwise U can start marrying the two nah since u don't know what to do.
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by AceDomino(m): 11:19pm On Jun 01, 2018
Bro, the only problem you're having in the house is your dearest wife... Because she had made her sister more than too comfortable living with you and her.

AceDomino was here
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by RenzoFunds(m): 11:20pm On Jun 01, 2018
Oga send her packing sharp sharp. She get plans.
Let her go and look for her own husband.

2 Likes

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by ElGood: 11:20pm On Jun 01, 2018
Paulpaulpaul:
@Kennyprince, you are wicked, how could you occupy my place?



Leave her with your wife and sleep in a hotel once in a while, when your wife asks, tell her your want her to enjoy gist with her sister.



She will swiftly respond if she's wise


Konji is a bastard, the wife can follow him to the hotel o, and by mistake she enjoy the cabling, I fear she will not abandon your home to her elder sister because una never get pick.
Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by Nobody: 11:20pm On Jun 01, 2018
sasalite:
Best advice so far? I won't allow ANYONE to make me unnecessarily uncomfortable in my own house (not even my parents), unless on health grounds or if one of them is dead and it becomes necessary to house the one still alive.
Then you don't have a big heart. When you marry, you're not just marring a wife but everyone. By right your in-laws should visit once in a while and should know when to leave but when they're not making the move to, you don't just throw them out. You lose a relationship by doing so and it's not good.

7 Likes

Re: My Wife's Elder Sister Has Finally Settled In My Home & I Don't Know What To Do by truthstands12: 11:20pm On Jun 01, 2018
Please man up and tell your wife to ask her to leave. If she doesn't do so, tell her to leave and nothing will happen. If they like, let them term you bad person, you need space in your house. Its high time we men stand up and stop all these forming to be a good person to everybody.

1 Like

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