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I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by drchuks1234(m): 1:44pm On Jun 25, 2018
Pray about it and tell her the truth and make her to understand you, if she truely love you she won't leave but have some patients
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by justli: 1:54pm On Jun 25, 2018
@op, if you are still reading, I'll try to answer your question. Forget about all those condemning you. If you search a bit closer you would find they themselves are not free of the act.

Back to the question. First i must put it to you that you watch porn. even though you didnt mention that, but i know you do. A lot of people say all the good stuffs about porn, but trust me, it is the quickest way to lose the strength of your erection.

You might not realise it, but over the years, you have taught your brain to only respond to artificial imagery as seen in porn. When you meet a real woman, your brain doesn't know what to do. This is the experience of thousands of guys battling porn/masturbation addiction.

Don't hate on yourself. But you must try and google the danger of porn/masturbation. There are lots of active communities online for guys like you. Trust me, the world is increasingly elevating porn as the best thing to ever happen to us, but in reality, every porn addict knows their life's essence is gradually eroded. #saynotoporn

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Kizito2nv(m): 1:54pm On Jun 25, 2018
No one will really understand what the young man is passing through unless uv tried quiting masturbation. And failed

Op i can help u , scrap that u u can help ur self
And trust me it's not something u use gragra, willpower to stop,

The cause of ur poor election is PED due to excess masturbation,

First u need to work on killing the the habit not just because of the PED but because u want to leave a clean life ,


I was a masturbator too like u , and let me tell there is nothing i didn't try to kill the habit,

1, made vows to God
2, abstained
3, discussed it with my Babe, even made vows to her i won't do it again
4, hated myself
5, joined NoFap

S

Still i was deep in the act, though thanks to NoFap, some one referred me to a book online and it was an excellent book

It didn't just help me quit masturbation but help to stop very harmful habits

Help me get over my ex girlfriend after passing through an emotionally abusive relationship

No to pm just Google
"HACKNEY EASYPEASY"

if u follow the instructions not only will u be free

But for now join the NoFap forum for more on the PED and get experience from others struggling like u , whatsapp me will be glad to help please don't call 08128190603

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by justli: 1:57pm On Jun 25, 2018
@op, if you are still reading, I'll try to answer your question. Forget about all those condemning you. If you search a bit closer you would find they themselves are not free of the act.

Back to the question. First i must put it to you that you watch porn. even though you didnt mention that, but i know you do. A lot of people say all the good stuffs about porn, but trust me, it is the quickest way to lose the strength of your erection.

You might not realise it, but over the years, you have taught your brain to only respond to artificial imagery as seen in porn. When you meet a real woman, your brain doesn't know what to do. This is the experience of thousands of guys battling porn/masturbation addiction.

Don't hate on yourself. But you must try and google the danger of porn/masturbation or google "no fap". You will be inspired by what you see and the healthy support you get. There are lots of active communities online for guys like you. Trust me, the world is increasingly elevating porn as the best thing to ever happen to us, but in reality, every porn addict knows their life's essence is gradually eroded. #saynotoporn

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by phyllistas(f): 1:57pm On Jun 25, 2018
musa7m:
thats mean dem don yash you be that
?
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Justpassingby2(m): 2:02pm On Jun 25, 2018
Chop boiled unripe plantain for 3days .... thank me later
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by justli: 2:08pm On Jun 25, 2018
Kizito2nv:
No one will really understand what the young man is passing through unless uv tried quiting masturbation. And failed

Op i can help u , scrap that u u can help ur self
And trust me it's not something u use gragra, willpower to stop,

The cause of ur poor election is PED due to excess masturbation,

First u need to work on killing the the habit not just because of the PED but because u want to leave a clean life ,


I was a masturbator too like u , and let me tell there is nothing i didn't try to kill the habit,

1, made vows to God
2, abstained
3, discussed it with my Babe, even made vows to her i won't do it again
4, hated myself
5, joined NoFap

S

Still i was deep in the act, though thanks to NoFap, some one referred me to a book online and it was an excellent book

It didn't just help me quit masturbation but help to stop very harmful habits

Help me get over my ex girlfriend after passing through an emotionally abusive relationship

No to pm just Google
"HACKNEY EASYPEASY"

if u follow the instructions not only will u be free

But for now join the NoFap forum for more on the PED and get experience from others struggling like u , whatsapp me will be glad to help please don't call 08128190603


This corroborated my post. Because you never masturbated doesn't mean you should vilify those strugling with the act. Masturbation and porn addiction is harder to overcome than drug addiction. Again, I think the closes way to overcoming this is by joining a nofab. They give every reason, not just because your pastor said, why you should stay clean. Goodluck guy.

And most of you quick to vilify, what do you really gain from tearing down an already broken fellow. You lots claim to be pious and christians, but with no love in your heart

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by GeniusDavid(m): 2:15pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...

Try NoFap.com and change your life, being a chronic self-servicer without first hand sexual experience has affected you. Its time to crave the warmth of a woman and not your hands. Beating masturbation is the only way forward.
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Rhozabeth(m): 2:18pm On Jun 25, 2018
Guy you have a very big problem on your hands in the sense that masturbation always deal the brain a very big blow couple with arousal problem that will come up later! You need to begin to seek professional help to get off masturbation first then you will now begin to treat arousal problem! As for the babe u need to open up to hear, if she wanna stay to help fine if not, let her get the hell out! Trust me its a very big problem u have!
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by mcgaius: 2:35pm On Jun 25, 2018
See your brother

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by eniorisha(m): 2:42pm On Jun 25, 2018
Why getting so close to someone with whom u don't see yah future? I'm yah big bro in this. I'm in my early 30s .

I never masturbate & hardly compromise. I insist on online & distance rlshps. My previous rlshps hardly last 1 year.

They usually insist on visiting but I mostly decline. Two of my exes DT visited; one of them was so desperate DT she's ready to insert it herself. She's d only lady I ever allowed to play with my dick.

The other lady dt came severally, she hate sex herself. So , we gat no problem. She doesn't romance often sef. So, we are still best friends. All my other rlshps are online & on phone & everything romance & everything sex related between us end on WhatsApp & Fb.

Although, i often initiate explicit chat & demand semi nude rarely ,I warned one few mins ago to stop all these dirty chat with me or I end d rlshp. I told her we'll do everything when we get ready for sex. She's so fond of:

"I wan feel your lips on my nipples"
"Come & lie down with me..."
"I wan play with yah rod..."
"Come and bathe me....". and so on.


To d OP,

Be more patient if u aren't ready to settle down anytime soon. But if d lady is good & decent, keep her for a serious rlshp if d rlshp will continue after Nysc. I'll even suggest u compromise & gv her what she want. Nothing so different spiritually, btwn all u av been doing with her & actual penetration. DO THE DO JOR! But don't keep multiple sex partners nor visit brothels but stop masturbation.

Sorry, I hijacked yah thread for my long epistle. Lol
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by jetson06: 3:04pm On Jun 25, 2018
You need some ass bro.
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by charlsecy(m): 3:13pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
I'm a devoted Christian
Mtsheww..
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by kpolli(m): 3:17pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...

One word, relax!!

Don't be too excited, critical or over-thinking.... Relax and imagine you're on the beach enjoying cool breeze
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by joshrare(m): 3:47pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:


Thank you very much. I goofed. I normally don't let any sexual occurrence begin with any girl, but it happened with this girl somehow. I'm still battling masturbation tho. Sometimes I'm very successful for a month or so, and then something happens and all of my efforts crumble all over again. I really don't know how to put an end to that habit; Nothing seems to work.

Do you watch pornographic videos? if you do try n stop it
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Joemetry(m): 3:53pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...

@Confiman , PM me and I will give my all to help you, and again bros you can't curb masturbation by reducing the frequency at which you mastubate, masturbation is only stopped by stopping it.

Mail me.
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by jimohomotayo(m): 4:27pm On Jun 25, 2018
Learned!!!
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by MzDeeb(f): 4:38pm On Jun 25, 2018
Op, if you don't mind you can send a mail to h8@gmail.com. I provide online counselling and therapy session for free.

I have counselled people with issues like this and i am glad to tell you they have improved over time.



Confiman:


I said it was a bad habit I picked up... One that I'm trying to conquer. That doesn't mean I like it. I've tried getting help severally, even reporting myself to my parents when it first started, but I haven't been able to get past it. In no way did I insinuate that I'm proud of masturbation up there.

P.S: This post has been modified to make it less insulting. My initial response which you will find in quotes below was rather emotional. Please do not take it personally, and do not let it prevent you from giving me mature help and advice. The posts below concerning my hypocrisy might also go some way to shed light on this comments.

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by cooltola(m): 4:54pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...

My own take, how to stop masturbating since you are Christian
Avoid checking porn and avoid being alone. When you are alone the devil will creeps in and tempt you. Do not feel bad, God is faithful
Do not be idle also, read your bible and mediate on the God word
If you are lonely , go to your girlfriend. set boundaries that you will not have sex by not going too far. You are not alone
XXXChurch.com is a group that call help with porn addiction and masturbation
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by jedisco(m): 5:11pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...

@op what you're experiencing is not strange and quite common with first timers or those who have stayed off sex for a while. Most times, it boils down to anxiety.

To remedy this, there are certain practical steps you must take.

1. Try and relax your mind. This is quite difficult because the process of actively trying to relax may make you more tensed. An easier way is to tell yourself that it would soon be a thing of the past. Something you both would laugh at. Soon enough she may be the one complaining of too much sex.
Remember, you can't force an erection

2. Let her know that you're a virgin. Also, explain to her that you've read up on it and its quite common with first timers and it has nothing to do with your attraction for her. Let her know that she can read up on it too and that it would soon pass. This way, you're both relaxed.

3. Stop Masturbating for now. Soon enough, you would be able to build up more sexual pressure and make your erections harder and longer.
Always remind yourself that if you must release, it must be through sex.

4. Take your mind a lil off sex for now. Cuddle each other and get comfy around each other. You can have BJs and hand jobs but never release through this means. This way you'd learn to only release through penetrative sex. When you think you're hard enough, you can proceed to penetrate.

5. Adopt a position that enables you achieve and maintain erection quicker. Lying on your back may help.

6. The process of putting on the condom is likely to be when you loose it. Since you're both first timers, you could screen yourselves and try without it. Then she could stimulate u both rubbing the head of your peniz against her clit. But remember to do this in her 'safe period' and also use 'morning after' pills to prevent pregnancy as you're likely to release inside her as a first timer.

7. RELAX because it would soon be a thing of the past

Finally, remember abstinence is the best and sex is best enjoyed within the confines of marriage. The choice is yours.

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Organs(m): 5:20pm On Jun 25, 2018
justtruth88miSt:



so u av had several encounter with girls... guy i don't even knw ur sickness...


Na English comprehension be your own problem...... solve that one first before advising another person, cos you have to comprehend what someone is saying before you can give advice.. grin grin grin

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by opedaydydx9(m): 5:21pm On Jun 25, 2018
Masturbation has ruined ur libido. It's a pity.!!!!!
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by villageboy24(m): 5:24pm On Jun 25, 2018
Hey bro try yourbrainonporn.com it would help you understand what you are going through and help you out.
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by LordReed(m): 5:56pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...

You have over stimulated your penis to the point were you no longer feel "normal" sensations. You should stop masturbaing if you want that to change or else you will suffer erectile dysfunction. You should tell your girlfriend you want to take a break from sexual activities for a month or two, she'll understand if you tell her you need to get yourself together for the future.
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by holatunde1759(m): 6:01pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:
Please this might be a little lengthy but bear with me, everything here is needed to get the story out and ask my questions. Thank you.

This will go down as one of the most embarrassing moments of my life and I'm deeply confused. But before I go on, I'd love a quick intro.

I just created this moniker to chronicle all of my confusions and to feel free asking for help without any of my friends here tracing them to me. I'm 22 and a serving Corp member. I'm a hustler and I can say I'm doing fairly well for a Corp member.

I am still a "virgin" iff that term can be loosely applied to someone who masturbates. I'm deeply disturbed by my masturbation, but that is not the purpose of this thread.

I recently met a girl - also a Corp member - whom I'm really, really fond of. However, I strongly believe that sex is for marriage (I'm a devoted Christian) and so I have always stayed away from it. With this girl tho, we get frisky a lot. I shared my first kiss with her, and we've since gotten more intimate than I'm usually comfortable with. Sadly, that doesn't help my desire to stop masturbation as I always do that after making out with her. When doing so, I imagine all we had done and it gets me off.

However, this is where it gets embarrassing. When making out with her she sometimes gives me a head. Despite all of her efforts tho (and she is sincerely really good), I can't get myself to remain aroused. No, my hands don't give me half the sensations I get from her mouth, but it still doesn't matter as I just can't remain aroused enough to get off as is the case when I'm by myself.

Today was the very worst as I kept shrinking rather than edging towards release. It angers her cos she believes I don't want her, or how else does she explain it? She feels if I wanted her as much as she wanted me that it would be different. I know my conscience pricks me while we're at it but I don't know if that is the cause. She says I think too much about it... but I can't help the thoughts. Now I'm torn.

I need to know just two things:
1. Is it my 'plenty thinking' that's hindering me when with her? I've already put away most of my inhibitions to get that far with her, but I can't seem to go further. And I don't really think I want to.
2. How can I tell her to take away the sexual edge of the relationship without coming across as offensive, and without confirming her belief that I don't want her?

P.S: Before you begin bashing the lady, note that she is also a virgin. Her vagina is still very much sealed. I doubted that at first, but I've seen it and... So I know. I don't want to lose her but I don't want to go so far either...


grin grin orisirisi
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by chukwudi3(m): 6:24pm On Jun 25, 2018
Yet u are graduating.....
Confiman:


I [b]said it was a bad habit I picked up... [/b]One that I'm trying to conquer. That doesn't mean I like it. I've tried getting help severally, even reporting myself to my parents when it first started, but I haven't been able to get past it. In no way did I insinuate that I'm proud of masturbation up there.

P.S: This post has been modified to make it less insulting. My initial response which you will find in quotes below was rather emotional. Please do not take it personally, and do not let it prevent you from giving me mature help and advice. The posts below concerning my hypocrisy might also go some way to shed light on this comments.
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by sydneyboss(m): 10:30pm On Jun 25, 2018
Please all of you typing masturbation causes erectile dysfunction ED should cease to say that, masturbation is not the cause of ED
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Nobody: 11:48pm On Jun 25, 2018
zainmaxwell:
let me modify....op u are not a Christian,so don't come here and be forming cos u r a masturbating xtian









eehen Oga seun Sey na u I go send my account number for my ftc?
Is there a on going promo for Ftc
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Nobody: 11:51pm On Jun 25, 2018
Avedonn:


You don't believe in sex before marriage, but you romance your girlfriend, she carry out BJ on you, you even checked her vj to confirm it's authenticity.

So what makes you different from those that engage in premarital sex.

In my opinion they are even better than you because they are sinning and also enjoying but in your case, you are sinning and still torturing yourself by constantly checking the cover of your girlfriend's VJ whether is open or sealed. If it's sealed, you'd then nod your head and close it back while salivating without eating.
Now I know why Jesus said IT IS FINISHED
You have finish him
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Nobody: 11:56pm On Jun 25, 2018
Confiman:


I'm not sure I understand you sir. I haven't said I intend marrying her, I believe time will have to tell. I just don't want to continue doing anything stupid before marriage.

No, I'm not in the born again crew. I believe every one is free to make a decision about how they want to live. I don't berate others for not holding on to the same principles as me. If you engaged me in a discussion, you'd hardly know I don't believe in sex before marriage, cos I love my discussions clean without any holier than thou whatever... In fact, the few that hear my stand doubt it's sincerity, that's how free I am. But my fear is that I don't wanna lose my values, values I've held on to for so long... Yet, I don't wanna break her

Yes, I agree I'm a very emotional person. But I'm not sure how it applies here?
I think you are confused and Dont know what you want.
You Dont want sex before marriage yet you are going as far as receiving a Bj(It's going to happen soon)
She will either loose control or you lose control someday.
Both of you are being a little childish. Do it if you want to do it, and Dont do it if you Dont want to do it(Even if it means breaking up)
Because trust me, that lady wants it and you know that you want it too...
I am not trying to be a Devil here...
Just follow your heart
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Nobody: 11:59pm On Jun 25, 2018
UrbanExotica:
And give head lmao.
Actually he gets the head
Re: I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed by Nobody: 12:03am On Jun 26, 2018
Sage7:
Masturbation damages the soul.

It deprives you of so many blessings.

Things might turn out to be normal in terms of achievement, but know that it still reduces your accomplishments in all spheres of life.

It damages you spiritually. It limits your social boundaries, shyness becomes a thing, makes you eat a lot.

It is a good excuse not to fornicate or commit adultery and saves you money from the process of wooing and getting your legs over a lady but the bible says it is a sin against the body.

You can still be a brainy but it reduces your brain functionalities,
you watch porn, every well-figured woman will arouse you, chances of being a paedophile is high, cheating at the long run is inevitable.

Masturbation is easy to get on with for a long time, but it is a BOMB waiting to explode. It destroys.

FIGHT IT WITH EVERY SINGLE ATOM, ENERGY & MATTER THAT IS WITHIN YOU!

Learn sex transmutation in the book THINK & GROW RICH chapter 11 vs 205- 228.

Yes you can stop it, with God all things na tansho!!!
50% of this is false I Dont eat a lot, every woman doesn't arouse me, in fact I hardly get the attention of anyone around me, and I don't even look at anyone underage at all(Chances of pedophile)

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