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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? (4598 Views)
Baby Girl For Adoption / Husband Taking Meat From The Pot Of Soup/stew: Whats Ur Take On This? / T (2) (3) (4)
Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by yvyy(f): 12:59pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
am almost 2 yrs in marraige and i feel i need to adopt a baby of less than 2 months. but am not sure how the whole world and colleague who see me daily will percieve dat. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Nobody: 1:44pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
@yvyy - Have you and your spouse exhausted every medical examination that proved it is impossible for you to have a baby? If yes, I still advise it is too early to go for adoption just two years into your marriage rather turn your attention to God. Experience has showed that couples can still make babies against medical tests after over 10yrs of marriage. Deep yourself in the Lord and see the life of Abraham and sarah as an encouragement that there is nothing God cannot do. Going for adoption now means accepting defeat so early and it doesn't show enough faith. I am not against adoption of a baby but it should be taking as the last resort. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by yvyy(f): 2:15pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
@big-gy.thanks but i dnt wish to wait that long to mother a kid.while waiting for a miracle and smthing to happen ,we thot its an option to make d waiting comfortable. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Africanqueen2(f): 2:25pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
yvyy:There's nothing wrong in adoption. . . So long as ur husband have no qualms wit it. . . Adopting will may u less worried. Its a good thing dear. . . I know of many couples who adopt and they re all living happily. . . Each child brings its own blessing. . . 1 Like |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Fhemmmy: 2:42pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
I think the first thing we need to get out of our system is worrying about how other people will think about us, you might be surprised to learn that those other people would love to do it as well, but they are worrying about how you would see their actions. As long as it is aiight with your husband and it is aiight with you, damn others and their thinking. God for it Ma . . . There are so many kids out there that would use a good home. But please and please, if you are not sure you would love that kids the way you would have loved your own blood kids, please, leave them alone where they are, cos there are so many people that adopt, only to show those kids hell when they start having their own kids. Good luck |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Fhemmmy: 2:43pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
Big-Man: Adoption is not for only those that cant have kids |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by dupsytosh(f): 3:02pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
Fhemmmy: u are right, have seen a woman that adopted and stopped loving the girl after having her own child. its a good idea if u know u can love the child and ur own children equally, but if u can't, its not a crime, don't just let the poor kid go through a ugly experience by adopting him/her. better to leave them where they are as he said |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by yvyy(f): 3:09pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
@ african queen,fhemmmmy and dupsy, thanks y'll.u guys r right about d love thing.and afriqueen thanks for the encouragment. but u knw its not all abt damning wt other people say its also abt how they will relate it to the child when he/she is growing up. also am not sure in my working place if i will be entitled to d 3 months maternity leave to takia of the baby if they knw its adopted baby.so wt do i do.my hubby doesnt want us to lie abt d kid so i also dnt knw hw his extended family will react to me and d baby on dat. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Africanqueen2(f): 8:16pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
yvyy:Just have a leap of faith. Explain things to ur boss, he's human he'll understand. As for family, they might be hostile but if they re civilised they'll understand but then they re not the ones nursin the child. Put in mind that whatever u do either good nor bad people will always talk. But then in time they'll run out of stuff to say. Prayer is the key to everythin. Put ur fears before God and take it a step at a time. U'll find out at the end that was nothing to worry about. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Nobody: 8:37pm On Jun 18, 2010 |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by iice(f): 2:30am On Jun 19, 2010 |
For some reason. . .i'm getting the adopting a baby = shopping from this thread ![]() |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Nobody: 8:01am On Jun 19, 2010 |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Fhemmmy: 2:57pm On Jun 19, 2010 |
yvyy: Ma . . . Though not sure how things works in Nigeria oh, however, an adopted child is now yours 100% and that means you shd be entitled to whatever you would have if the baby was from your bossom . . . Find out about it at your office, seek some legal consel as well, cos it does not sound right to me. You need time to get used to the baby, need time to love the baby and all that . . . . and your husband is a great guy for saying " no lying about it" cos truth always find a way to come out. Good luck |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by dave247(m): 3:01pm On Jun 19, 2010 |
Though adoption is not a bad ideal, but for me i still believe your child will come soon. but 2 year is too fast for that, just be prayerful, Much love |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Fhemmmy: 3:04pm On Jun 19, 2010 |
dave247: Adoption is about love and not about just cos someone cant have a baby . . . . . 1 Like |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by MadMax1(f): 8:45am On Jun 20, 2010 |
Why do you 'need' to adopt? We have two boys, the older is adopted, the biological one we had last year. We adopted because we fell in love and knew he was our son. We've been together for over a decade but married less than two years and plan on adopting wherever and whenever we meet our kids. Please know yourself enough to know exactly why you want to adopt. It's not just about you and what others will think (who gives a rat's tail) but about the child. You've been asked what'll happen when your own kids start coming. It's important you know the answer to that. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Onchedu(m): 11:51am On Jun 20, 2010 |
If my wife agrees to it with me I'd like to adopt a few kids. maybe one or two however I intend to put them in a more homely forster home with people that will raise them. All we'd do is finance their up bringing and be there for them when they need us. Having more people in Ur home can create tensions that wouldt have arisen on a normal day. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by yvyy(f): 8:38am On Jun 21, 2010 |
@ chaircover,i have done all that and put them all into consideration i havent written God out cos i knw he is able.the adoption is to keep my mind off askin al d time and believe strongly and to love smone that i will call my child @iice- i really dont understand you .is it that u r thinking of adopting and u r being encouraged to do so by this tread or wt? @fhemmmy- i will take ur advice and do that when the time comes. @ afri-queen, thanks. @ others thanks for all your concern. i knw its a big step to take and am takin ,my time even though it was my hubby's idea to adopt.this is because our chances of having our own baby is purely gonna happen by a miracle.medical situation cant do anythin 4 us at d moment. presently both of us r on fasting this week expectin God to change our situation cos its in his report we belive in. thanks y'll. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by iice(f): 10:37am On Jun 21, 2010 |
^^Nevermind. Goodluck chaircover: rofl. . ![]() |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Africanqueen2(f): 11:57am On Jun 21, 2010 |
U re welcome dear. . . Don't worry God is faithful he'll not let you down. . . Just have faith and hope in him. . . Ur dreams will come true one way or another. . . |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by steaming(f): 12:48pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
@ yvy, this is really so touching and like others have suggested----do a true deep soul searching, you may not have all d answers, you wud have ur doubts but let God guide u and ur decisions. your husband must be a good man and i pray he remains so and even better. you say medically, nothing can be done---just wondering what the problem is. but like you rightly said, u believe Gods word. it may not be easy but sincerely my heart goes out to you, may he give u and hubby the grace to keep on, he knows everything. Gods grace and strength. You would smile some day soon, ur desires will b granted u! |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by Nobody: 12:50pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
African Queen, you are such a matured lady. Wherever you are I want to be your friend. No strings attached. Mail oludyke_5@yahoo.com. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by JOKYTECH(f): 1:58pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
@Poster The world definition of a child is either by BIRTH or by ADOPTION. Am happy for this trend that u brought up, unlike others that sound piting in their choice of words, I encourage ur boldness on this issue. I pray God to give me and my husband such boldness. Adoption is not suppose to be for those that are barren or those that are above the age of given birth, It is suppose to be meant for those that are happy with life and children. Its not supposed to be the last resort after many years of marraige. A child brings happiness in the home (whether the child is given birth to or adopted). I know of a couple that adopted a child and the wife took in dat same month and gave birth to twins. Pls and pls do not listen to any side attraction, talk to ur employer on it, I know they will be happy with u and as I can see, ur husband can handle that of his family. We don't even know the child that would bring success in life, Its beta to die having an adopted child than to die having non. wishing u the best 1 Like |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by bani(m): 2:36pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
A very nice step. Just search your heart if its about wanting to show love and raise a kid and not just about wanting the world to see you have a kid (for those who do not know you) then please do go ahead. You have to realise the same people who would talk about the kids are the same people who would make jest of you not having a kid, they would still talk, so follow your heart I have an elderly friend who is about 40 and just adopted a girl, they joy on her face and the love the kid is receiving makes me appreciate adoption, ive been to some orphanages and no matter the presents or weekend love you show to these kids its nothing in comparism to a homely love!!! |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by livin: 2:55pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
Does any know what the adoption process is like in Nigeria? |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by otukpo(f): 3:22pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
Poster Believe. Your miracle is on the way. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by highhigh: 3:26pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
am also intrested in adopting a baby girl. can some one put me through? |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by deagleng(m): 3:43pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
Please House Advice Me, What should I do? I am a man, 40 years of age, my spouse is 38; I got married nine years ago. My spouse had given birth to a baby girl while she was in Secondary school; the girl finished her SS 3 this year. But since I got married to my wife, she had been unable to conceive. We’ve tried medical and native drugs none worked. I suggested to my wife that we should adopt a baby, she refused, I suggested this because I love children and I want to have the one I could call mine. I suggested to my wife nine years ago when we got wedded that she should let her daughter stay with us, she refused, the girl stayed with her parents. Recently after, thorough medical examinations, it was discovered that I have low sperm count, yet my wife did not cooperate with me on the said adoption. Advice me, what do I do? |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by yvyy(f): 4:04pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
go and do cisi or what is called IVF or take medications for your spermatozoa count to come up. @everone that took time to post thanks so so much. @livin and @ high-high, the steps to take is to first of all get an adoption liscence from lsgos state secretariat which is given quarterly.then after dat,u go to any orphanage of ur chose to adopt.but without d liscence,orphanage homes wont listen to you. good luck. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by OAM4J: 4:11pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
deagleng: whao! this is so complicated. As much as I think your wife should be a lot more sensitive, it is also not good for her to accept to adopt a child she will not see and treat as her child. Adoption only works when both parties believe in it and want it, it can not be forced on people. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by macdaddy: 4:17pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
@yvyy Please go ahead and adopt if nothing can be done medically.People are always quick to advise other people to wait for their miracle when there are other ways to solve their problem.They even forget that miracle cannot happen to everybody.Pls am not saying miracle does not exist or that you should forget about miracle but miracle can still happen to you even after you adopt.SO CARRY GO. |
Re: Whats Ur Opinion On Adoption? by yvyy(f): 4:23pm On Jul 16, 2010 |
@macdaddy thanks. |
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