Firearm:

Your story is really pathetic,

No need using my Sledge Hammer on u

I think both of you should sit down and talk about your lives. You need to sort out all your differences once and for all. Marriage is not sometin u jump in and out at will. I suggest you take her to a place where u can talk heart-to-heart.

Since you dont have an apartment, maybe book a hotel room, but dont let the animal in both of u overshadow what u came to sort out. If possible, dont have any body contact with her.

If u love urselves so much, and u're all willing to forgive one another without regrets, u can talk about marriage and proposal. But remember, most times, we forgive and dont forget. So u 2 should get ready to live with it all.

Then comes the issue of your 40k monthly salary. I think u should even rent an apartment b4 u talk about marriage. U need to save up for one first.

Wish u all the best. Will contribute further as the thread develops.

D company:

I had to register on nairaland because i have seen a lot of useful advice on this forum.
My situation is quite pathetic because i don't seem to know what to do now hence i ask this forum for some advice.
A little about myself: 
I am 30yrs old, I finished my Nysc in 2005 and presently working in a procurement firm in Port Harcourt, my salary is 40k and i am squatting with two friends- one married with kids(His family lives in Benin) and the other guy is equally single.(he is 37 yrs old).
halfway into my service , i incidentally met an old friend(i will call her Joy) in  Benin whom i had initially asked out(first met her in 2007 in delta state when i went to visit my Uncle). we traveled together that same day , while i was heading back for my PPA and she was going home. i asked her out that day and she yielded.
the relationship was all bliss until after my service, when I got a job in Lagos and she was pregnant i was in Lagos while she was a student in Uniben(300 level), we got it sorted. after the pregnancy issue, we started having other issues and somehow separated.this separation lasted for about 1yr and we were reconciled again. The bliss lasted another 7months then another issue came up. (we had a truth or dare session where we both confessed our sins, although i think hers was more grave than mine) i confessed to having a one night stand with her friend way back in school, that was before she yielded say 2002. unknown to me the girl (Enitan) was her best friend up until the time of our confessions. Right after the confessions ,she started behaving funny and wouldnt take my calls nor return any. after much pressures from me, cos we were still apart, a friend of hers took my call and told me that Enitan was fetish and that she had started keeping enmity with Joy  because Joy stole her boyfriend and because of that she was getting off the relationship.(i was slightly drunk that day)
After a while again we started chatting and we got back to the relationship and off again.
the reason am writing this now is because we are back again to where we left off. she is still single and she is 29. what caused the last separation was that i told her she had attitude problems and that i was there to help her through it( not entirely her fault because she had a very terrible experience as a child and her mum passed on while she was very young. this led to her falling in moods occasionally) and her response was that there was no us anymore, that the handwriting was on the wall.
I called her last week, and she expressed herself as this" if only i could take back all i said" . the truth is that i love this girl so much such that i can never love another the way i do her.  and am thinking of proposing to her  when i see her in a couple of days from now. she also told me she was ready for marriage and that i have not shown interest in marrying her hence most of her worries.
On my part, my salary is 40k with no apartment of my own.
DO YOU THINK ITS OK I GO ON WITH MY PLANS OF PROPOSING TO HER NOW?

Firearm:

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Sometimes, I might not see anything wrong in what I did; but b'cus it hurt u, I should understand u dont like it and apologize.
The primary goal should be to make one's partner happy at all times.
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D company:

a couple of factors stand in the way of resolving issues in our relationships:

1.pride,

2.ego,

3.anger,

4.distance,
the separations my relationship suffered are as a result of the above four.although it is not limited to these only, there are a lot more,
just like the contributors have said so far , it takes maturity to to be able to handle issues and thats where we missed it.
i have read several articles talking about managing partners with moods and i can see that i dint manage mine well. and she wld have perceived that i dint understand her. but now i do.

many thanks to all you guys that have contributed to this topic.