I know many have told me to stop voicing out my fears as others in my shoes [or worse off] are living life positively without wailing. Some people want me to stop my pity threads. I tried to listen and stay away from nairaland. But for how long can i remain silent? Things are not going well for me.

Hmm... My heart is heavy with a lot of worries. I'll let you in on some........

The pain and discomfort i feel within my body has refused to subside. I took panadol extra not long ago. I've also rested adequately yet i feel unease. Hmm.. Whatever is wrong with my internal organs is definitely 'eating me up.'

i lay turning on my bed from pricking pain. I'm gloomy, looking unkempt, weary and disconnected from life. My mates are probably sleeping to regain energy for the new week. But i lay redundant and useless despite my youthful age

Why not drop the sh*t off?

I used to be a child of God. Very active in church. I belonged to many societies [a catholic]. This kept me in church throughout the day at times. The catechist knew me, the reverend fathers praised my diligence while the parishioners admired my dogmatic subjectivity. I had big dreams of being favoured until an abstruse sickness struck me in 2015.

I wonder why God let it happened. From throat problems, my eyes are affected. Down to loss of balance, difficulty swallowing and disorientation. I can't even wash my clothes regularly and take care of my hygience.

Hmm... I've lost 'the faith'. Now, i'm loosing my mind

Sounds like you have some kind of infection.....a good hospital is the place to visit to diagnose and treat your condition....not Nairaland.

I have nothing. No good health, no reliable friends, no university result despite my effort, no proper health care, no good clothes, no cash to help my mum in paying the rent, no good life, no good food, no girlfriend and so on. It's just me in my world feeling solitary, empty and distraught.

I had wanted more from life. I had talents i could utilise. Like i'm good with words, i can make speeches and deliver them accurately. But since i'm handicapped, my dreams are fading away.

I urge everyone to guard their health zealously. It's the main thing that can give peace of mind. I wish i didn't joke with mine

Have you been diagnosed of any illness?

I think you have a very severe depression and your mental health has been seriously affected by it. Please see a psychologist asap before you harm someone or yourself

ekensi01:


Why not drop the sh*t off?

I don't understand

Originalsly:
Sounds like you have some kind of infection.....a good hospital is the place to visit to diagnose and treat your condition....not Nairaland.

hmm. You won't understand.

I'll try not to talk casually of death again. I left the task i had to do today abruptly because my body system couldn't cope outside. I'll hold on to the life i have left! Back to the bed, lying down and lost in thought. I know being inactive won't put food on my table but i've acquiesced to my body signs.

Reminiscing about college life. It was my best moment of the past. I remember how myself and others would crowd up Common Room in Hall 3, Uniben close to exam period. I remember trekking long distances on Uselu Road when i was broke. I remember buying 40 naira beans at eateries to take back to my overcrowded room for garri. I remember the ecstatic mood i fall into after seeing my stellar performance every semester on the notice board.

Hmm.. Everything is in vain now. I've spilled twice due to unpaid fees. I don't also have a sound health to struggle for the fee. I advise those reading to make haste while the sun shine. My thoughts continue to prick my heart. My mates are well-established now

LivingDead:
I don't understand

Emergency Case

How market

Kearl:
Have you been diagnosed of any illness?

it's a throat infection I ignored for too long

912:
I think you have a very severe depression and your mental health has been seriously affected by it. Please see a psychologist asap before you harm someone or yourself

you're not far from the truth. I've lost my joy

ikhileomotayo:

Emergency Case
How market

hmmm

LivingDead:
hmm. You won't understand.

Give ur life to Christ, or rededicate ur life to him, and go on a day fasting and fervent prayer. The lord will intervene in Jesus Name.

Also please look for a goid living church to be attending

LivingDead:
I have nothing. No good health, no reliable friends, no university result despite my effort, no proper health care, no good clothes, no cash to help my mum in paying the rent, no good life, no good food, no girlfriend and so on. It's just me in my world feeling solitary, empty and distraught.

I had wanted more from life. I had talents i could utilise. Like i'm good with words, i can make speeches and deliver them accurately. But since i'm handicapped, my dreams are fading away.

I urge everyone to guard their health zealously. It's the main thing that can give peace of mind. I wish i didn't joke with mine

. As long as a you mind is still intact there is massive hope for you. I will recommend you what will change your health and life in a very short while. Download as PDF since it will cost you nothing and read these books they can far more that you think. 1. Power of the subconscious mind by Joseph Murphy
2. The secret by Rhonda Byrne. YOU COULD WANT TO IGNORE THIS POST BUT DON'T I COULD BE THE WAY THROUGH GOD WANT TO HELP YOU OUT

You are not dead. Get help from the hospital through the catholic church, i know they can help u... Just stop coming here wasting ur time writing all these epistles. Do something to save urself. Na who dey alive dey make am
If u die today no one here or where u stay will die with u. Its the least u can do for yourself.... Survive & live

Hmm...your Moniker alone, is so heartbreaking.

Myself, I stopped believing in hope a long time ago. My fears led to Anger, anger to hate and now hate is suffering. I understand that feeling where you feel no one actually knows what you're going through. The pain of being a nobody, and abandoned by everyone. I understand too well, that feeling of 'not living' anymore but only 'waiting'. Don't have thoughts of death anymore. I know that's not easy but you must bury that thought. Think about your mom. Pour all that anger, resentment and pain into building yourself to be better. I know how suffocating it feels to be silenced ...but life happens anyway. It's cruel, cold and harsh. You're the one who wouldn't let yourself be put down.
Bro, as long as God keeps waking you up, He's not done with you yet. Please don't give up.
I don't know how it's gonna happen, but I just want to believe that you are going to overcome.
please be strong; please don't give up.
Warrior on!!!

dairykidd:
You are not dead. Get help from the hospital through the catholic church, i know they can help u... Just stop coming here wasting ur time writing all these epistles. Do something to save urself. Na who dey alive dey make am
If u die today no one here or where u stay will die with u. Its the least u can do for yourself.... Survive & live

hmm... I'm the timid, paranoid and reticent type. what if i'm replied harshly or embarassed?

Thanks for the tips though

As I dey see am so, livingdead e bi like say your healing dey for inside Boxer007 yansh o?!

FVCKING trolls both of you.

NhSnailwrites:
Hmm...your Moniker alone, is so heartbreaking.

Myself, I stopped believing in hope a long time ago. My fears led to Anger, anger to hate and now hate is suffering. I understand that feeling where you feel no one actually knows what you're going through. The pain of being a nobody, and abandoned by everyone. I understand too well, that feeling of 'not living' anymore but only 'waiting'. Don't have thoughts of death anymore. I know that's not easy but you must bury that thought. Think about your mom. Pour all that anger, resentment and pain into building yourself to be better. I know how suffocating it feels to be silenced ...but life happens anyway. It's cruel, cold and harsh. You're the one who wouldn't let yourself be put down.
Bro, as long as God keeps waking you up, He's not done with you yet. Please don't give up.
I don't know how it's gonna happen, but I just want to believe that you are going to overcome.
please be strong; please don't give up.
Warrior on!!!

wow.. thanks for the edifying message. I've been fighting on for three years now. I'll try not to give up despite the pains

LivingDead:
I'll try not to talk casually of death again. I left the task i had to do today abruptly because my body system couldn't cope outside. I'll hold on to the life i have left! Back to the bed, lying down and lost in thought. I know being inactive won't put food on my table but i've acquiesced to my body signs.

Reminiscing about college life. It was my best moment of the past. I remember how myself and others would crowd up Common Room in Hall 3, Uniben close to exam period. I remember trekking long distances on Uselu Road when i was broke. I remember buying 40 naira beans at eateries to take back to my overcrowded room for garri. I remember the ecstatic mood i fall into after seeing my stellar performance every semester on the notice board.

Hmm.. Everything is in vain now. I've spilled twice due to unpaid fees. I don't also have a sound health to struggle for the fee. I advise those reading to make haste while the sun shine. My thoughts continue to prick my heart. My mates are well-established now

my fellow UNIBEN student.
wetin happen na?

4reala:
Give ur life to Christ, or rededicate ur life to him, and go on a day fasting and fervent prayer. The lord will intervene in Jesus Name.

Also please look for a goid living church to be attending

I'm a catholic

EzeIgboNwaChukwu:
my fellow UNIBEN student. wetin happen na?

Life!

LivingDead:
Life!

Life is like a dream, but we are not aware of this. Just same way we re not aware of our dream state until when we wake up and then the dream doesnt make sense any longer either its a good dream or not.

Same way bro life is a dream and one day we are going to wake up and smile away. What you are going tru now is just a nightmare. In the large scope of things it doesnt matter when you finally wake up to your reality

Xtianvic:
. As long as a you mind is still intact there is massive hope for you. I will recommend you what will change your health and life in a very short while. Download as PDF since it will cost you nothing and read these books they can far more that you think. 1. Power of the subconscious mind by Joseph Murphy
2. The secret by Rhonda Byrne. YOU COULD WANT TO IGNORE THIS POST BUT DON'T I COULD BE THE WAY THROUGH GOD WANT TO HELP YOU OUT

okay. Thanks