Ralaji:
Please I was introduced to this forum by a brother.
Please kindly read my story and drop your advise.
I met this lady 6 years ago immediately I broke up with my last girl friend, she agreed to visit me after a month and we began to have intimacy on her 2nd or 3rd visit. By 4th month she started disturbing me that her parents want to meet me meanwhile she was a free giver whenever she visited,atimes she sleeps over in my place. There is this cool headed girl I was about sealing her deal then that she spoilt for me. On my first plan visit to her place she was not around I guessed she had a date with one of her guys which I got to know through our conversation over the phone, the guy actually camped her for 3 days but she lied to me that she was with her brother. Eventually I went to her place and I met with her mum and dad her dad had health challenge while her sister is staying in their house on the excuse that her husband works in another town but later got to know that she's having issues with her marriage. On that day its as if I was jazzed because I started doing anything herself and her mum ask me to do. While visiting she used to tell me about getting car that it would be nice and being someone that is so trusting and believing that she will do same to me, she also asked whether I have landed property which I said no. At my place of work there some cars that were place for auction then I applied for one and I was granted.
She complained about my apartment she said the area is bushy I had to look for another apartment I even run to my mum for financial assistance over this.
While preparing for our wedding I funded most of the expenses they were able to do all these because my people do not stay in the city where we are.
After the wedding I was already in debt and she lost her job when it was like 2 weeks to our wedding.
After the wedding she told me that she had bought a car and that it was with her brother.
I began to spend on the car immediately her brother brought the car starting form number.
Some months after the wedding there was an occasion in their family and they share money I carried the highest being that her elder ones are jobless except 2 of them that are managing, she is the last among them.
Six months after our marriage we had our son. She stood on my neck with her mum that we should do all the shopping for the baby being the first born I eventually spent around #250k on this still in debt. Some of those things are useless today.
Around the time we had our baby she said her colleagues in school have started paying for school fees I said she should defer it till following year but her mum started begging eventually I put up my car for sale I never knew that her car is problem on its own which is sold to her by one of her boyfriends. The car is actually a used Nigeria car package for her like new at #600k being fanciful at that time and very presentable than my own we put mine for sale and his brother stylishly bought it from us to clear her school fees.
When she went for exams she came back with some new clothes which I knew were bought for her by her boyfriend.
She got some money from her uncle like 2 years ago she said she wants to travel abroad she spent all the money on the processing which eventually failed.
Around this time I lost my job too, but was able to get some money which I gave to her to go and get her result in school.
She help me get one temporary job which I did for 3 months but before I left ihelped her secure another job this is after 4 years of our marriage I also helped one of her brothers to get job too.
I got another too but lost it around may this year it is a deposit mobilization job so we were all asked to leave when we could not meet up with the target.
Around June my wife started misbehaving I started noticing that she's sleeping around I felt so bad I had to turn to God for serious prayer still hunting for job but God has been faithful in settling some bills.
I got a financial assistance from someone recently through her to pay for rent and children bills when she said she cannot help with the bill.
I feel so cheated and I even think divorce will be the best when I eventually get my life back on track but I don't want my kids to pass through what I went through because I'm a product of a polygamous settings.
Please don't mind my grammar kindly advise me, the did is done already.
Meanwhile the men of God have told me repeatedly that God says I should not revenge.

Please advise. Thanks.

During courtship, she was showing you all the signs of not being prudent but you neglected it

Seat her down and tell her how disappointed you are over her and her attitude

See if she has any remorse towards your discussions with her

If she doesn't change, because it's likely she might get worst, just neglect her and face those kids

If you suspect she is messing around you too start getting someone that you will be close with

Life is too shot for one person to determine the joy of another

Gradually, things will fix it self either you separate or you live with it

DQ94:
There was a report about a pastor who released a sextape involving him and a lover... It was on Front Page, even.

Well... Here goes: https://www.xvideos.com/video40711727/nigerian_pastor_funking_his_mistress

Go to the sexuality thread, will you?

sassysure:

It didn't widen after popping out your kids but can widen cos it accommodated prikks that's not up to 10% of human head and body including yours or are u saying u have tiny Winnie?
Bro, go and sit down.
See how divorce is very easy for you to say.
As you have already condemned ur wife, what do you want people to tell you?
From the beginning of your epistle, u already called her a cheerful giver when u were very busy collecting what she was giving. What a hypocrite u are!

I wouldn't be surprised if it wife is the one who need the divorce from you as I have learnt here that the guilty ones always run when no one is chasing them.
Tell her to come and give her own account.
We then might have a case to debate on.

Don't mind the hypocrite

its obvious that u have made a mistake in choosing your life partner the question now is what next,damage control,forget about divorce that may make matters worse, I guess u have already talked with her it will not change anything, once a cheat always a cheat ,try and find something doing to be getting money do things that will make u happy,stand your ground with her crazy demands,appear no longer to be interested in her,if u can find a sweet babe that she may know about, competitive jealousy will kick in.this battle is more a psychologic warfront non the less

oweniwe:


A cheating married woman will eventually either kill her husband directly herself or have him killed by another means.

Any man living in same house with a constantly cheating wife... His life is in God's hands

God's hands you said? Nah!
His life was in God's hands before his wife began to cheat but once a wife starts cheating, my bro,d man's life is hanging by a web thread ooo albeit a thick one

Welcomme:
Marriage is the greatest scam I have ever seen in my life..

That's simply because you've allowed the sad marital stories get to you. You concentrate more on them,hence,making you arrive at such primitive conclusion.
PS: correct the mistake in that your hausa status abi na personal statement ni