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How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons - Family (10) - Nairaland

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Should I Divorce Or Remain Subjected To This Punishment For My Infidelity? / Should I Divorce My Wife? / Should I divorce my wife for this? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by FixAm(m): 11:37am On Jan 02, 2019
My brother/fellow nlander dont let anyone talk you to stay not even pastor once a lady has all thses habit u have mentioned its difficult for anyone to change her. Please its better to walk away alive than be depressed or LATE. Am just recovery from a similar situation. Ladies are demon they have no feelings once they have get hold of you and start messing up with Ex or friend zone

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Rozaytee: 11:37am On Jan 02, 2019
Mehnnnn....this is d definition of a bad wife... D lord is ur strength bro
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by IrepChrist: 11:39am On Jan 02, 2019
*Take her to Church* She needs *Christ* Salvation///
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by agarawu23(m): 11:40am On Jan 02, 2019
It's either the op isn't telling us the whole story or he is dumb.

We have read about a man who left his marriage and baby boy he likes so much with just his guitar.

Why will a sensible man continue such relationship?

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by megafone: 11:43am On Jan 02, 2019
Guy, when monogamy becomes a problem, polygamy becomes a solution. I decided to summarize it to test if the problem was wisdom. Best of luck;
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by slydog(m): 11:43am On Jan 02, 2019
Mccullum:
In marriage I consider some action as intolerable acts.

A wife that still relating with ex-boyfriends is not a wife.

A wife that is confronting husband with weapons in order to injure him and not for self defense is not a wife.

A wife who has no one she regards from both husband and her family during anger and frustration to persuade and caution her to listen and show regrets for her misconduct, she's not a wife.

A wife who refuse to listen to her husband's advice and always act against the warning of her husband, she's not a wife.

A wife that always glad in sadness of her husband she's not a wife.

A wife who doesn't fear God, will lack shame, one whose lacking shame won't fear God.

Blame yourself for lacking skill of discovering bad side of the woman you have chosen as wife.

Think and decide by yourself.


That first point is apt!
Late last year, a girl I wanted to marry, in my house late at night and early in the morning still receiving calls from guys and toasters even in my presence! One day we were in my car and she said I should lower the music someone is Calling her, as soon as I found it was a toaster calling, in my presence, and u want to pick the call? No respect? I stopped the car, ask her to get down, she did and I drove off.
We all see these red flags and turn a blind eye to it cos most times we are overwhelmed by love.

12 Likes

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by deafeyez: 11:44am On Jan 02, 2019
OKOATA:
I see you as a weakling, you have been manipulated by your woman. She's not into you anymore. She stabbed you and that means she can kill you in your sleep. She doesn't even respect you anymore. She's sending text messages to exes and does that not tell you she's a dog sleeping around like an animal on heat? Get out of that house asap before she poisons you. You don't have to ruminate on why she changed towards you. Nigerian women are more deadlier than Queen Cobra, they can pretend to get what they want. I am sure she married you for the money. You are the typical Mr Nice guy that's why she takes you for a fool. You too dull sha. Secure your assets, get a DNA done and divorce the wh0re of a woman you married. Run for your life[b]mumu[/b]
. grin grin

After you advice am finish you come still call am mumu.

3 Likes

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by BigBizzy(m): 11:45am On Jan 02, 2019
I can't imagine my wife doing all these, or becoming the captain of the ship...nah bro.

your son is grown now. send her away bro. let her go and chill in her parents or sort herself. forget that divorce talk first, let her leave the house so sanity can return. your son is learning shit growing up.

observe your boy and begin to correct the ills he's learnt over the years.

she should leave first, divorce will come later

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Adiwana: 11:47am On Jan 02, 2019
emkz:
Please guys, stop calling him a weakling. If you have an inkling of what most men go through in marriages, you'd support them when they face difficulties like this. It is absurd the kind of stories you hear.

I am so sorry bro. Like I explained in another post, you need to be alive to love. You are not Romeo in Romeo and Juliet, or Jack in Titanic who sacrificed their lives for love. You cannot be that stupid especially for someone who is not worth such sacrifice.

No one can explain the mentality of women, because no one understands them, even themselves. And a woman who is awesome during courtship is desperate for marriage. Once you wife them, they'd show you who they really are. We don't know who is a good wife and who is not, it is only the Grace of God for us to find our best partners for life.

You have made the best decision to divorce her. I know you feel helpless and hopeless right now. Give it time and you'd be fine. And for other people who are contemplating whether to stay in abusive marriages, divorce is no longer a stigma. We have seen people die of sudden cardiac arrest. No one tells their stories. Cardiac arrest don't just happen. It is a build up of stress. So please share your stories and don't die in silence.

And an appeal to the women, PLEASE if you love your ex so much; leave your marriage and go and be with him. You can't be destroying people's lives because of your confusion.


He's nothing but a weak man.The fool is not going through anything in his marriage.Want to know what going through rough terrains are in marriage for a man??Losing your job or having your financial sources crumble and having your wife make ends meet,not having a child especially a male child as what is obtainable in Nigeria.Dude is not suffering from all this things and he's wife stabbed him 3 weeks into marriage??God,I can't even say anything concerning the other things he was whining for like a bitch and you say he's not weak??

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Josephamstrong1(m): 11:47am On Jan 02, 2019
Men of todaaaaaaay!
How did we get here?
Back in day, you don't hear all these shitty cow dung stories about wives fighting and stabbing or trying to stab their husbands. As a matter of fact, we married more than two wives and yet we have them under control.
And here we are, can't even manage a relationship, talk more of one wife in a marriage.
The land needs cleansing.
The gods need to be appeased.
Aru!

8 Likes

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by ChiefSweetus: 11:47am On Jan 02, 2019
Cautionary tale.
I thank God for BuddhaPalm. Read his posts from most recent to oldest. He addresses many of these issues most masterfully.
I had this exact same situation but my chi was strong. Shittested till the facade fell. My chi never took it even as far as Intro.
Sorry bro. Even the best are suckered in by eve's daughters. It is a man's job not to be stupid like Adam.

2 Likes

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Josh44s(m): 11:47am On Jan 02, 2019
royalamour:
Met in 2014 November.
Dated for 11 months. All these while she was so homely and accommodating.

She would call to let me know about her movements even when I did not ask for.

She would apologize at any slight opportunity.

It was all rosy.

The parents kept calling and advising me not to let other ladies win me over.

They would visit or call my parents at every given opportunity and I felt "this is it".

We got married almost a year later.

The first 2 weeks of the honeymoon was smooth until the 3rd week and bam! there was disagreement about money.

She stabbed me with a knife though the cut wasn't too deep. It took me months to catch up with reality as the lady I was dating was a total different person.

That was the journey of misery and then it was nagging, disrespect and stuffs until I caught her on the phone telling her ex that she misses him and sh1ts.

I was devastated. This lady refused to apologize. She won't even listen to me whenever I asked to have a heart to heart talk with her.

I had to involve her parents and it was by force before she apologized.

She got pregnant and 9 months later she was delivered of our first son.

2 weeks later, my attention was drawn to constant beeping on her phone and when I checked, my supposed wife was discussing with another of her ex about how tight and intact her vagina was cos she gave birth through CS. And the guy used to be jealous cos he enjoyed the sex they had as she was always tight and shits.

I was devastated. I drew her attention to it and she denied feigning ignorance. It was when I showed her screenshots that she accepted and asked me to forget about it, that what has happened has happened.

She would never say sorry. So called her elder brother and he begged me and begged her to apologize, still she won't.

I reported to the mother. This didn't help matters. The aunts numbering about 4 had to beg on her behalf.
I let it slide.

Things got worse and it came to a point where she would not cook. Even times when I return home from long journeys, I most times will have to go into the kitchen to sort myself.

Mum got sick and I asked that she come to us so that we can go to bigger hospital for proper check up and hell was let loose.

She stopped cooking and would only cook whenever she desires.

Time past and my life became almost miserable.

I would close from the office and won't be able to go home. I would stroll into a beer parlour and while away time till maybe 10pm and would sneak out very early even before she wakes up.

Earlier in 2016, I had empowered her with 1.2 million to start a business and one dime I didn't see as return on investment with her citing low patronage as the reason for the collapse of the business.

It was until the elder brother who was staying with us asked her for money and she refused that the dude disclosed that she made about 2.6 million from sales of items and services she rendered in the shop she denied making nothing from. She could not deny this fact but for my son I let it slide.

My wife would bring her female friend into the home and this lady even when she was engaged to a guy still go out to sleep with other guys.
I asked her to stop been friends with her and she blatantly refused. She would go ahead to invite the lady into my home and rain insults on me because I don't want them together.

This final one was the calls she was making with her ex most times when I was away in the office.
I noticed and she couldn't deny it. I later learnt that her cheat of a friend was the middle person that delivers messages to my wife whenever I was around.

I can't take it anymore.

I don't wanna die before my time.

I can't eat in my house anymore as she threatened to poison me and nothing will happen. This was let out in a heat of a moment while we were exchanging words.

What's the express way to divorce without complications?

NB: The dad has asked me to quit before I start to develop HBP.

If I see you anywhere I will strangle you and Delete you myself before the devil you called a wife does. Are you this stuupid and unfortunate in life. Will you wake up and divorce her immediately! Foooolish f00l!. angry

5 Likes 2 Shares

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Nobody: 11:50am On Jan 02, 2019
She should go back to her parents house before the divorce is finalized. But you made a mistake, I can never live with a woman that would pick a knife and threaten to stab me, talk more of actually stabbing me. I can't live with her pass that day, I can't even sleep because I will feel she might stab me when I'm sleeping. I can't risk it bro but you ignored that. To my future wife, I don't care how mad you are, you got the right one

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by seasy: 11:50am On Jan 02, 2019
Ugosample:


this happens ALL THE TIME

especially in Nigeria

They settle for the available, and think they deserve better undecided

Which may not actually be better undecided

And the unfotykbste man who marries them suffers for it

True
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by mubeela(m): 11:50am On Jan 02, 2019
Op, u r nuts
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by mozona(m): 11:51am On Jan 02, 2019
my brother ave u check if ur son is urs.

no be oyinbo country we dey wey u dey find divorce, pursue her comot for house
since her parents are aware of her shortcoming. pursue with cane if it matter

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Nobody: 11:51am On Jan 02, 2019
You will be surprised. Good women are becoming more scarce, So many ladies pretend to get that ring. Most girls go through the hoe phase, before deceiving one man. It’s not just easy to leave someone you’ve invested so much in, I feel sorry for that Man.
rangerover:
DUDE I NORMALY DON'T MAKE COMMENTS. BUT YOU ARE PISSING ME OFF. THERE ARE A MILLION AND ONE GIRLS OUT THERE THAT
WILL CHERISH YOUR KINDNESS AND HEART. LIFE IS TOO SHORT. NO ONE SHOULD MORTGAGE YOUR HAPPINESS. LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. START AFRESH. YOU DESERVE BETTER. AND YOU WILL SURE GET SOMEONE BETTER.

2 Likes

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by mubeela(m): 11:52am On Jan 02, 2019
Powerexpert:
Is she holding a gun to your head?

Dnt mind him abeg. I think he is nuts. Hope he didn't cross over wit it
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Swagtrills(m): 11:53am On Jan 02, 2019
hmmmm, am actually short of words at the moment cos am also going through a similar scenario, though we are not yet married. she tells me virtually everything even without asking, but recently when i visited her on Christmas day, some of her friends also came around and was asking her in my presence that awon boyfriends yen ko (pardon me cos i dont speak yoruba much), but i know it means how are ur boyfriends. After they left, i asked her what that was all about, and she said, shes a crazy friend and that is how she talks. There is no denying, she's not materialistic and not too demanding.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by izuzu: 11:56am On Jan 02, 2019
I couldnt even finish reading the disgusting piece.

So Mr. Man, you still need people's advice?

I wish you all the best in your future endeavor!! embarassed

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by brainhgeek(m): 11:57am On Jan 02, 2019
Nostradamu:



Hmmmmmmmm! True, true, trueeeeee! Finally, a fam whose thinking differently from the "general crowd".

True bro. There is too much danger in judging from a one-sided story.
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by coldFLARES1(m): 11:58am On Jan 02, 2019
royalamour:
Please don't mind the typos and other errors.
If your story is true, then you surely must be in an unenviable position.

In no particular order, I rank disloyalty, infidelity, lies and disrespect as deal-breakers. The trigger is off already and there isn't anything to salvage, else we'd be looking at one of a Thousand ways to die!'.

I know I may not be saying anything new but I would still like to add mine even it means echoing someone elses' position.

You have empowered her to be independent as such this is the time to leave so she can enjoy absolute independence, including the freedom to be with as many exes as she wishes.

If you are in a paid employment in an organization with branches, discretely seek postings to a far away branch. Begin to deliberately shirk in your responsibility to provide for the home, including meeting with rent obligations so that you don't leave her to enjoy rent you've paid for.

Be totally indifferent to her activities, both online and offline, to preserve your health including consenting to offers of mediation from her family or friends.

You don't have to initiate divorce. Simply stay separated and not responsible for her or your child for 3 yrs and she'd be the one to initiate it when any of her exes that is 'shacking' her comes through for her.

We all love our kids, but you must defy such to extricate from that disaster waiting to happen. If to take care of your pikin tire am, she go go drop am for your mama.

Lastly, feel free to start sampling babes going forward till you find someone with a better marriage credentials. Shalom!

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Willie2015: 11:58am On Jan 02, 2019
Adiwana:



He's nothing but a weak man.The fool is not going through anything in his marriage.Want to know what going through rough terrains are in marriage for a man??Losing your job or having your financial sources crumble and having your wife make ends meet,not having a child especially a male child as what is obtainable in Nigeria.Dude is not suffering from all this things and he's wife stabbed him 3 weeks into marriage??God,I can't even say anything concerning the other things he was whining for like a bitch and you say he's not weak??

I feel this dude is sleeping with someone..
His wife knows about it and the wife is doing this as a payback...
U just need to hear the wifes story ...
Its not every woman that can handle such especially if the marriage is young
I still feel this dude is holding some info..

3 Likes

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Bizibi(m): 11:59am On Jan 02, 2019
royalamour:


Thank you for your contribution.

I will proudly say to you that I haven't cheat nor betray her trust in anyway.

She was in charge of my finances until 90,000 disappeared within 4 days unaccounted for.

I have always tried to show examples and even her dad, the elder brother are have asked me to thread carefully.

I am no saint but I tried to be a noble man.

Thank you.
man!!! You really tried,some ladies love using men's weaknesses to misbehave.every time I think of settling down I'm always scared of ordeals like yours.

Do the right thing,your health is more important.

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Dessy96: 12:00pm On Jan 02, 2019
Adiwana:


You shouldn't have quoted me stupid fool.Hes better than me and he's wife is stamping his head to ground like a bitch ass nigga he is.If he's looking for an advice. He should stick a gun up his mouth and blow his brains out.That way he's wife will stop torturing him.ode
OK Bitch
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by eallstar: 12:00pm On Jan 02, 2019
she will eventually kill you and enjoy your wealth with her
ex
run as fast as your leg can carry you.
a word they say is enough for the.....if u know u know.

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Bizibi(m): 12:02pm On Jan 02, 2019
Willie2015:


I feel this dude is sleeping with someone..
His wife knows about it and the wife is doing this as a payback...
U just need to hear the wifes story ...
Its not every woman that can handle such especially if the marriage is young
I still feel this dude is holding some info..
this one is even small, there is a neighbor here that sleeps with young boys,the husband knows but he is enduring in the marriage.

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by izuzu: 12:03pm On Jan 02, 2019
Swagtrills:
hmmmm, am actually short of words at the moment cos am also going through a similar scenario, though we are not yet married. she tells me virtually everything even without asking, but recently when i visited her on Christmas day, some of her friends also came around and was asking her in my presence that awon boyfriends yen ko (pardon me cos i dont speak yoruba much), but i know it means how are ur boyfriends. After they left, i asked her what that was all about, and she said, shes a crazy friend and that is how she talks. There is no denying, she's not materialistic and not too demanding.

Bro, yours sounds real!

As the same Yoruba's will say

" Inu ere looto wa" Translation..." Na inside play truth dey"

My simple advice sir :

1.Do other findings,weight other qualities and prayerfully make your decision .
2.Dig into her past, not judge her by it, but to give you an idea.
3.Pry into her privacy, Sounds mean ,but hey,you're about to make a lifetime decision.
4. Befriend her close friends...as the saying goes "Show me your friends..."

Try not to end up like this Mister Man !!

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by sawdi: 12:04pm On Jan 02, 2019
royalamour:


Thank you for your contribution.

I will proudly say to you that I haven't cheat nor betray her trust in anyway.

She was in charge of my finances until 90,000 disappeared within 4 days unaccounted for.

I have always tried to show examples and even her dad, the elder brother are have asked me to thread carefully.

I am no saint but I tried to be a noble man.

Thank you.

It's a miracle you're still alive.

My advice, get a very good lawyer and divorce her immediately. That woman is not your wife.

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by ChiefSweetus: 12:07pm On Jan 02, 2019
Acidosis:


You didn't address the ex issues before your wedding. Marriage will not automatically erase a woman's feelings toward an ex. If she didn't get over her ex before marriage, she won't in marriage. Aside the change of name and that band, marriage changes nothing. A cheat and a careless person will always remain the same until a conscious effort is made; it doesn't matter where you conduct your wedding, Paris or Rome.

More importantly, the world these days don't give a fck about married women, you can go ahead to wear 25 wedding bands. The same kind of conversations you hold before marriage will always come back to live. Those randy buddies won't care whether you're married to a Pope or a Senator.
Gone are the days were people consciously respect married women. A married woman that wants to be respected needs to respect herself before marriage.

Bottom line, your wife hasn't changed. You only decided to get played at the onset. I bet you didn't even care to know about her past (you're probably one of those folks who claim they don't care about the past). Oh well, the past will always come to haunt those who fail to address them. Getting to know about these exes after 2 years in marriage shows the kind of courtship you had.

On whether to divorce her or not? I think you should listen to your in-laws. When your own in-law tells you to quit after several attempts to correct their daughter, trust me, only a f00l will advise you to continue. I don't know more than her parents who raised and trained her. They probably even know more than you do, so listen to them and listen to that inner voice.

Now unless you're marrying a total virgin, you need to dig deep without raising trust issues. Don't ever make the mistake you made in this marriage in your next attempt.

All the best bruv.
100
Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by WrathOfHadez(m): 12:10pm On Jan 02, 2019
royalamour:
Please don't mind the typos and other errors.
you're a weakling. Make sure you do a paternity test for that child. Might not be yours!

And what's an express way of divorce? Ask her out of your house and ask the Family to return your bride price!

Stop looking for advice when you know what to do .

1 Like

Re: How Can I Divorce Expressly? See My Reasons by Willie2015: 12:10pm On Jan 02, 2019
Bizibi:
this one is even small, there is a neighbor here that sleeps with young boys,the husband knows but he is enduring in the marriage.

U may not know the whole story....

the husband may have been the whole cause....

He got no option than to endure it...

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