TRANSCRIPTION OF THE LIVE MATCH BETWEEN PDP AND APC
Today is 23rd February and the postponed, most anticipated and talked about match is finally here. I am Rabo Israel ESQ. your host for the day, I would be navigating with you through the 90 minutes of this thrilling match.
The match was earlier scheduled for 16th February 2019 but was postponed by the Nigerian political football league (NPFL). That action of NPFL aka INEC raised lots of concern from international observers as to the credibility of the match and has led to accusations of match fixing by the opposing team PDP against its major rival APC.
This much anticipated match has brought home lots of name calling and tagging, accusations and counter accusations: The defending champions have been tagged as Amnesty for Past Criminals (APC) and they’ve countered by echoing the opponents nickname of People Deceiving People and Papa Deceiving Pikin (PDP).
The rules of today’s match is as plane as a foolscap sheet: there are 36 goal post in the pitch, and an extra post in the middle making a total of 37 goal post. Whoever has the highest number of goals and 25% of the goals in at least two third of the thirty seven (37) goal post is declared winner by the referee.
Today’s match has been described as one of the most historic match of the decade. The man in whose hands the whistle lies is Prof. mahmood Yakubu he succeeded Amina Zakari who served as acting Referee
Behold the whistle is blown and the 90 minutes countdown begins.
Ten minutes into the game and APC on an early lead already, the captain is intimidatingly dribbling, and what a goal!!!… with a single shot he scored almost all the goal post in Northern side of the pitch but PDP seem to be crying out foul especially about the goal in kano goal post, the referee is currently communicating with AVR as we awaits his verdict. His verdict is out and it’s a massive goal. If this were boxing I would have described it as an uppercut. APC scores with a flying header in Katsina goal post but surprisingly the captain stretches his neck to inspect his wife’s thumb to be sure she is cheering him to victory.
A fowl has been blown against APC and a penalty awarded to PDP in front of Adamawa goal post, the chance is well utilized and it’s a goal for PDP
The tempo of the game has traveled to the southern side of the pitch and PDP is literarily on top gear. The PDP assistant captain seem to have trained well on this part of the pitch as he moves comfortably on the grasses there, the APC captain has been accused of not training on that path of the pitch and he is slipping and unable to even trap a ball there, but APC is obviously coming out strong in the western goal post. If you would ask me, that’s too much skill for a captain well over 70 yrs. His age has been in contention for many though, some calling it his football age, infact some say this is not the real APC captain that came back after his check up in UK,
There is a penalty kick awarded against PDP at the middle post, can you believe this? They just missed it! and here comes the counter attack and PDP scores with an acrobatic, that was an unforeseeable goal.
The game is over and APC takes home the trophy.
Now that the game is over, the APC captain holds tightly to his phone and stares unblinkingly at the screen in anticipation of a phone call like the one he received in 2015 but he received a message alert instead ‘ SEE YOU IN COURT’
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The match is over but the exchange of hateful words seem to have just began.
The commodity of words we use to trade and barter in the political market just dey make my head scatter.
What would we hand down to the future generation when tolerance has been issued notice to quit and prejudice the new tenants in our heats apartment?
We’ve divorced love and made sentiment in-law.
Why hate when love cost less
Irrespective of party irrespective of tribe,
Irrespective region irrespective of religion ‘we all bleed the same’
Rabo Israel Esq.
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Photo credit@yinka jimoh blog

Lol