@ POSTER,
IF UR BATTLING WITH UR CONSCIENCE
DEN TELL D TRUTH N D TRUTH SHALL SET U FREE FROM BATLE
BUT DONT SOUND JUDGEMENTAL D BALL IN IS HIS COURT TO PLAY,
SOME GUYS CAN TOLERATE SOME SILLY PAST WHILE SOME CANNOT,
IT IS LEFT FOR UR FRIEND TO DECIDE WETHER OR NOT HE WANT THE GIRL
4 ME WAT MUST BE MUST BE AND VICE VERSA.

likeme:

^^^ What is the essence of being a frend if you cannot tell me the hardened truth undiluted. That is what friends are meant for, We are more that sharing common interest or just aquitances. It's better to hear the truth from a friend than to be hearing the bombshell from an outsider, a stranger. A stranger can use it to abuse you, a friend will use the same information to advise you.

It is not an AMEBO thing, at least it's not a rumour, it's the truth he is speaking about.

i guess the kind of friendship people form in nigeria is different from the rest of the world. then again i see many men in nigeria who are friends holding hands  so yall are on a whole nother stratosphere of friendship in nigeria  in the west people keep things like this to themselves.  friendship in the west is defined by 'letting your friends take their licks in life but being there for them when they fall on their face'
the kind of friendships yall have in nigeria is oppressive and intrusive. ya friend can just come to you and tell you unsolicited stuff about your wife or girlfriend. thats insanity

seyibrown:

How many men tell their fiancees that they have despoiled or 'chanced' several girls or abused several minors? Many good women end up with rapists and paedophiles as husbands! Why is anyone complaining they get sluts for wives when their fathers, uncles, brothers and friends made sluts out of the women?

Poster, It's tricky! You might lose your friendship! I'd say talk to the girl, find out if she has changed. If she has changed, there is no need to tell your friend. Assure her that you will keep it confidential and keep a bit of distance from your friend. If she double-crosses you, that will be the time to send the videos to your friend!

Seyibrown, you should check back your first post on this thread and tell me how you are justified in your opinions advicing that he should keep quiet and if she eventually stabs him, then he can spit out (That is WHITEMAIL---or is it because he has evidence) Call a spade a spade.
Also what if she decides to misbehave to swiftycool after the KNOT has been sealed and stamped with witnesses, would his opening up be adviseable then?
All I am saying is you should reason a matter forth and back thoroughly and not stating what comes to your head immediately.

Sledge406, In talking to the girl, he might be able to convince her to tell her man the truth! He would have helped a liar tell the truth and helped reveal the truth to the one who has been deceived. I don't condone her lying about being a virgin but I still maintain that men do not tell their girlfriends/wives that they were serial rapists and have changed! If men wait till they get married for sex or stay faithful to their wives, most women will be come into marriage untouched.

It's hypocritical that the OP did not complain when his friends were 'doing' the girl back at school and passing videos around. He is now not happy that his friend will end up with their object of fun and ridicule!

well dear brother man,

Id keep it true,short &straight-forward. look nobody expects a saint on earth cos we all have our flaws and mistakes but som people are cowards man!             she's not a trust-worthy or good person either. [Im sorry if I sound judgemantal] but why on earth would she still lie about being a virgin? what the heck is d big deal wit not being a virgin anymore? if for instance she had lied about how many men she's had sex wit due to guilt now dat she's changed,dat wud b understandable. but now,dat she's still lying about being a 'virgin', even though she was a slut, dat cant be a changed person. cos a changed person wud not lie outrageously besides leading somone they claim to love astray.  even though d truth hurts sometimes, tel those u love d truth & if dey love u, many of these stuffs wud only hurt but dey wud find a way of 4givin u.

seyibrown:

It's hypocritical that the OP did not complain when his friends were 'doing' the girl back at school and passing videos around. He is now not happy that his friend will end up with their object of fun and ridicule!

Where did you hear that the OP's friends were the ones doing the girl?

seyibrown:

Sledge406, In talking to the girl, he might be able to convince her to tell her man the truth! He would have helped a liar tell the truth and helped reveal the truth to the one who has been deceived. I don't condone her lying about being a virgin but I still maintain that men do not tell their girlfriends/wives that they were serial rapists and have changed! If men wait till they get married for sex or stay faithful to their wives, most women will be come into marriage untouched.

It's hypocritical that the OP did not complain when his friends were 'doing' the girl back at school and passing videos around. He is now not happy that his friend will end up with their object of fun and ridicule!

Anyway Dayokanu has asked you cos d video in circulation was wit WHITE-COLOURED dudes (wherever dey are from) and not just 1 but 3 of 'em if I'm still on track.

Fact is everyone with his or her opinion but I hold strong to my gun dat he should go ahead and reason I'm still patient on this thread is to hear that swiftycool has spilled d beans (and I pray after he does, his friend can find it in his heart to forgive the said lady cos truly everyone deserves another chance as far as dey are remorseful from past acts). If my galfriend wants to know about my past ordeal and is not gonna use it against me, I will be willing to tell her, afterall I consider it past tense and not ready to go into such act again (I'm sure you'd be saying "if I can tell her dat I was a despoiler"---In Naija, you have to be hard to be a despoiler---not in totality but majority---so then you can phanthom those who must have engaged in such act and lastly, NA WHO DEM CATCH NA IM BE THIEF so if you have no proof of someone being a despoiler, you had better not raise an eyebrow unlike the UNLUCKY lady in say)

To digress a bit, _{someone tell me this gal is from OSU}

Just out of curiosity, how do you know for sure that she is a "slut"? Is this hearsay or have you actually seen her in the act with these other people you claim she's been with?

@ inked nerd. One of the commendable things the law has done, is the proof required in establishing some sexual activity between a man and a woman. Proof of closeness, outings, smiling with each other (don't laugh) hands holding, etc put together is enough. The reasoning is bottomed in the reality that it is just impossible to catch them in the act. Now you know, so be careful. On whether or not to Amebo (apologies to buzugee ma friend) dude has to diplomatically advise girl to come clean with her guy FOR THE SAKE OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP. Dude don't tell guy all you know, just a little to kindle some curiosity to ask for details from girl. No go threaten-o, bc she fit talk say na bad bellus sake of say she no gree do sontin. I don finish.

There is fire on the mountain, Big one,

A lied to me in naija one time about bn a virgin, sh.it I later figured the messy lie out, Thank God for my sensitive finger's, Naija babe's can lie %1000 on that level. A babe from western world will always tell be open to you.

the best tin for u too do is too tell ur friend if u call him ur friend and if u know d meaning of true friendship u will take him lik a brother and never let him fall into fire, cos that girl who claims to b a virgin is worse than fire, so do ur duty as a friend

@poster,are u sure ur friend is not aware of her past life but was only trying 2 make his girl luk decent not knowing dat u know d girl? Tell him but be careful dude keep us posted.

I would tell him . This is marriage and he deserves to know. If she told him he would brush it off. If she didnt then he would know. He would even thank you for saving him from such.

Do you know how many guys want to kill their wives for them pretending to them?

debosky:

post the video here for us to verify, then after that inform him.

I can't believe that Debosky actually typed this and pressed the reply button. So just HOW do you expect to verify the doings of a girl you don't even know?

seyibrown:

Sledge406, In talking to the girl, he might be able to convince her to tell her man the truth! He would have helped a liar tell the truth and helped reveal the truth to the one who has been deceived. [/b]I don't condone her lying about being a virgin but[b] I still maintain that men do not tell their girlfriends/wives that they were serial rapists and have changed! If men wait till they get married for sex or stay faithful to their wives, most women will be come into marriage untouched.

It's hypocritical that the OP did not complain when his friends were 'doing' the girl back at school and passing videos around. He is now not happy that his friend will end up with their object of fun and ridicule!

VERY VERY TRUE. This was exactly what I said but some idiot called "like me" used it as a pretext to twist my meaning into something else. Any way it seems like the poster only saw the advice he wanted to see. You can do the right thing but it's very obvious he himself is not a very nice person. The last time he replied he said he found the video and was going to mail it to his friend. And that's just really nasty of him. He can tell his friend everything without showing him the video.

@ Buzugee,

Our Naija friendship na waoo. Our people get parable say, if ear no hear a bad word or message, heart no dey bitter.

They want him to just go and say hey friend, just wanna tell you that your fiancee has yanshed half of the men in Oshodi , and continued to 79% of men in Ajegunle .

Maybe this is the chance for the lady to settle down finally. In all honesty, who can swear by any holy book that his fiancee or even wife was not a call girl in her university days?
All these girls who fund going through university by selling themselves will one day marry somebody. Will any of them tell their future spouses about their past? Your guess is as good as mine

marabout:

Our Naija friendship na waoo. Our people get parable say, if ear no hear a bad word or message, heart no dey bitter.

You don read the story for ground make u nor dey weight of the matter

marabout:

They want him to just go and say hey friend, just wanna tell you that your fiancee has yanshed half of the men in Oshodi , and continued to 79% of men in Ajegunle .

Na today gyal don dey yanshed before thinking of settling down No be wen she don yansh finish den u go dey form say u never see pesin Dyke before say na fresh blood she be.

marabout:

Maybe this is the chance for the lady to settle down finally. In all honesty, who can swear by any holy book that his fiancee or even wife was not a call girl in her university days?

Who is saying s/he here is 100% clean Besides not everyone who happens to be a wife today was once a call gyal so nor even sweat am.

marabout:

All these girls who fund going through university by selling themselves will one day marry somebody. Will any of them tell their future spouses about their past? Your guess is as good as mine

Abeg, na by force to go skool? Must dey make money off it even if dey must be yanshed Na una dey give all dese people reasons to dey come up with flimsy excuse. The whole idea of this thread if I am not mistaken is to arrive @ a basic conclusion, which is for the TRUTH to be known before a KNOT is tied for life before someone lives in a life of regrets. Capish!

Before you decide to do anything, put your self in your friend's shoe. What would be your reaction if this kind of news should get to you about your wife to be? I only hope you understand your friend enough before you decide to take this upon yourself.

you suspect she is in the uk for the re-virginizing operation and she lied that she was a virgin. those are not the actions of someone who has come clean. i think she is still her old self and is really going to deal with your friend when they marry. i think you should pressure her to open up to your friend herself or better still just tell the guy the truth about the girl he wants to marry. but please dont be too graphical about the details.

@ Poster,

Pls inform ur friend. This lady is a killer and should be avoided. I do tell pple that no one should indulge in any past he/she can not defend. The lady in question was an adult wen she committed this act. She can not tell me that she did not know the right from the wrong? So, if after knowing this, she still went ahead to "exploit" the world, then she should be ready to face the consequence. Some pple might av wrong interpretation of my point, but I will give an example to justify my point.

I was discussing with a lady sometimes ago and she told me she had slept with more than 50 men in her life. This lady is just 24yrs old ooooooo. When I showed some kind of disappointment, she branded me Old skool. She said that was the best way to feel among and I kept quite. About two months wen she joined my company, she started having affairs with other colleague in the office and guess what, all form of rubbish any one can think of was engaged in, ranging from fingering to Mouth Action and intercourse both in the office and the guy's car. Even while driving, the act continues. After about two months, she had misunderstanding with the guy and another guy came on board and so on .

Lately, she claimed her Mum sick and she took two weeks break from office. When she resumed, she came back with wedding ring!!!!!. One day, wen we were discussing, she told me she had not married. She said the supposed be husband lived abroad and the guy came home to give her engagement ring in order to drive guys away from her. From what we discussed that day, I was very sure she will still continue with her usual way of life.

Now, if some months to the real wedding, I discovered that the abroad guy was my childhood friend, wont I tell him what his fiancee's past was?

The moral aspect of the story is that, Ladies especially should be conscious of their way of life. What goes around will surely comes around.

@1st- Three days ago, i met the fiancee of my very close pal from Nigeria, she had come to the UK for a medical check up. Seeing her face to face shocked me to the marrows as i realised she was someone i had known way back
then- Two weeks ago my friend had told me his fiancee was coming for a check up and for some shopping here in the UK, he had told me a lot about her
So this is definitely a poem

kemisuga:

POSTER WHERE ARE U?
ARE U ON VACATION?

May be his revelation has back fired

MrWaters:

@1st- Three days ago, i met the fiancee of my very close pal from Nigeria, she had come to the UK for a medical check up. Seeing her face to face shocked me to the marrows as i realised she was someone i had known way back
then- Two weeks ago my friend had told me his fiancee was coming for a check up and for some shopping here in the UK, he had told me a lot about her
So this is definitely a poem

MrWatersICanDetectMyOwnErrors, what is your point since YOU closely read and re-read the OP's post over and over again.
1st, he saw her 3 days ago after he had heard 2weeks ago from his pal dat d babe wud surface. So wat is wrong wit it

He never knew the person face to face based on the hype as at the 2weeks he heard of her coming until about 3 days when he saw twas a familiar face. I wonder which kind language I go use take explain to u since na u like POEM pass.

@All: sorry folks, swiftycool has been poi_son:ed and k**l*d by d sl*t. She later married d friend and dey leaved happily "ever after!"
Watch out for season 2!!!:-)

So, whatever happened? Did he tell or not

Where is the OP, Did you finally spill the bean or not?

Maybe she is a change woman what God has join together let no man put assunder

If the guy is really in love with the gal what's your headache.
ALLOW SLEEPING DOG TO LIE BO,
EXCEPT YOU KNOW FOR CERTAIN THE DOG IS ONLY PRETENDING TO SLEEP

if u were ma friend, and i think highly of u enough to allowing u whateva responsibility in my wedding, and i latter get to know what u're hiding, and i know u know. I will HATE U more dn d lady in question. U have proof to back up ur talk and u are here still looking for advice

mr swiftycool,
wetin happen na? give us update on the outcome o!
abi the girl don silence u ni? hope u are still alive sha, lol

I mentioned it from page 1 of this thread. I hope it has not happened.
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-506077.0.html#msg6673898
mr swiftycool, if you are still alive and kicking. please log on to NL and let us know.

You obviously missed the memo. Swiftycool is dead and gone to his grave -hmm haaa gone to his grave!

Until swiftycool comes out of his grave, this is a lesson to everyone - keep your f-ing mouth shut, and MYOB!