pocohantas:


You always crack me up.
They want bride price in FCY.

It is a normal thing o, relatives that never bothered to check up on their late brother's children are always eager for traditional weddings.

I hope your dad has a will sha, this one will kill him and make you guys homeless

Pavore9:
That is a good advice but we know most men will not take such advice in good faith and some would accuse their wives of wanting them to die soonest, living in denial about the fact that men are more likely to die before their wives.

If she explains the reason why a sound will is a necessity, hubby would/should understand... Or better seek for ways to solve the obvious problem in his home.

What am I reading here.

Jolenejole:
On behalf of a friend who seeks your advice,

My Father's younger brother lost his job as a security guard in a hotel about 7 years ago. He was then kicked out by his landlord along with his wife and son from their rented one room apartment.

My dad took pity on them and allowed them to move into our boys quarters for free till he gets a job and is able to get a place to stay (that was the agreement).

Rule 1......if u are a married man or woman do not stay with your relative in the city, except if it is in the village, this was the 1st mistake your father made, he should have rent a house for them or buy a house for them instead of allowing them to stay with him in the same compound

Its been 7 years since they moved in and this man has refused to get a job! [/quote]

Your father is the cause why he refused to get a job, when u over help people they natural become lazy, is good to help but too much of everything is bad


His wife has birthed 5 more kids (6 in total) in the space of 7 years!
[/quote]

One funny thing about this kind of people is they are lazy to work but very energetic in the bed

Rule 2.....do not help any poor man with more than 5 kids, u lazy and u no get money but your penis no dey tire to Bleep abi? U go suffer


My dad takes care of their feeding, school fees and hospital bills [/quote]

Your dad is one of the reason why this man did not want to work, if it is u, another person dey feed u, pay your children school fees and hospitalized u, my sister u go like work? Talk true? Free things do not have value dey only make one lazy, it is good to help but do it with sense

Daddy has offered him 3 jobs but he refused stating the pay is too small to cater for his family, NOTE: this man doesn't even have a primary school cert. [/quote]

He did not reject the job because of the pay, he rejected it because he feel your father is taking care of them, so no need to stress himself again

Few years ago daddy gave him the sum of 250k to start a business of his choice but he used the money to pay his wife's bride price and hosted a big traditional wedding, his reason? So his wife's family would get off his back. [/quote]

Human being naturally like to show off when dey have little money, person when never fit feed himself and his family finish dey find big traditional wedding when he won do, all for another person(your father) head



My mum is at the receiving end. This man went to my father's kinsmen and told them my mother is a bad woman and she is jealous of his wife who has 4 sons as my mother has only 2 female kids. [/quote]

He is indirectly laughing your mother that he did not have a male child, pls u guys should be very careful ooo, this kind of person can kill your father, so that his children can inherit your fathers property since your mother did not have a male child, your father should be very careful with him

He told them my mother wants him and his family on the streets.[/quote]


This man is trying to play some psychological games, but the fact is dat In this life no one owns u anything, not even your parents, so even if your mum want them out of his matrimonal house, is your mums right

Mother has been nice to them, the only issue she had was his wife coming into our kitchen to take food or cooking items without her permission or her children watching TV and scattering our parlor.

Beginning matters alot, if someone is doing something u did not like just tell Dem from he beginning bfore it too late, u guys saw this signs earlier but decide to remain silent, TV no dey for boys quarter? Why Dem still dey come on parlour cone watch film?

Mum has stopped letting them into the main house because the day she scolded the kids, their mum accused her of cursing them.[/quote]

I said it earlier, is too late now

One day my mother cooked and served them 4 pieces of chicken and this man had the audacity to return the food telling my mother to take a look at his male children that they can devour a whole chicken but she won't understand as she has no son, his wife stood behind laughing.[/quote]

Why is he always reminding your mum dad she did not have a male child? Pls u guys should be careful of this man or, he fit kill your papa and take over that house



He has also advised my dad severally to get a second wife. He even brought a 'maid' once.

What is so special about a male child? Those 4 male child he have if not for your father, he for fit even train one of them for University? No be arm robber or yahoo Dem go later turn to, mtcheeeew

My mother has complained severally to my dad who feels obligated to take care of them as his brother sacrificed his education for him.[/quote]

Your dad can help dem Sha, but the mistake he did is dat he should have rent a house for Dem instead of allowing den to stay with his family in the same compound

My mother decided to push no further and has seen it as a test from her God.[/quote]

Test from God? I doubt

We usually travel overseas for holidays and this man has been pressuring my dad to take his family along.[/quote]

So many incidents I can't recount here...

Mum is getting depressed by the day and dad is strained. I want to stand up and take the bull by the horn, please help



[/quote]

See enh, your father can continue helping them, BUT he should not help dem in his matrimonal home, tell your dad to rent a house for them somewhere else and help dem there

or else If your father continue helping them in his house, your father may not last long, because Dem fit kill am and take his property and wealth, after all he did not have a male child


So u guys should be very careful

Your papa no serious at all!
250k na money to use start business?
Oya come make I give you 250k to go and start business odenni
I love the way my family is...my brother always say;thing weh pass You,comot your mouth for there.
Advise your papa to rent them a house and pay them off.na so den dey do.
If they like they can take it to your kindred and see what will happen.
In my place(nneni),brother weh see light must lead the others on,not a choice but a fact!that is how anambrarians grew so fast as a people.
Unless u b mbaise
Na den dey like make dia brothers dey call den brother brother and dey wash dis cars

Nigerians and their sense of entitlement

This is so annoying... Your dad better kick them out because he has done his best for his brother, he owes him nothing more!

Pavore9:
The issue here is the Dad, as he seems to be getting his validation from spoon feeding his brother. He sees no inconvenience nor the wildfire that would erupt when he is no more.....the brother is hanging around with no motivation to be independent as he is eyeing what his brother owns.

The wife should make sure, what the family owns in the urban area also has her name and daughters names on it.

Some men just do not see anything wrong in placing their wives and children at the mercy of their extended family members when they are no more despite the raw deal they are certainly going to get and how we get to see it happen often.

Knew of a similar situation, happened in the early 2000s where the man had 3 daughters and had his younger sister who had separated from her husband come live with his family with her children, the man taking full responsibility for them and this made his other siblings see his house as their family house , his wife and daughters relegated to the background.

When he died, his siblings took over and sold the house. The wife and daughters left with nothing, their saving grace was that the wife's family didn't abandon them. They are all now living with their mother in the Netherlands, 2 of the daughters are now married to Dutch husbands while their father's family have been disturbing them to bring their husbands to the village to pay their bride price, a village they last visited when their father died. They boldly told their paternal uncles that they will never come down for any traditional wedding nor are they going to even get a chicken from them.

I love a happy ending. Thank you

alphaNomega:


I love a happy ending. Thank you

Sadly, life do not always have a happy ending.