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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting (1522 Views)
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Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by DaySpringer: 8:16pm On May 25, 2019 |
I have finally admitted to myself that I am not very good at texting/chatting. Especially with ladies. We barely have anything to talk about and after the mundane questions about school work, family etcetera, the conversation just dies out. The only thing that revives the chat is a smiley face reply to my funny status updates. Guys that have ladies loving up just from whatsapp messages & DMs, how do you do it? Girls what keeps you interested in chatting with a guy? Help a guy out here. I look forward to the mature and helpful comments. 1 Like |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by Oyindidi(f): 8:20pm On May 25, 2019 |
Mtcheeeew |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by Nobody: 8:26pm On May 25, 2019 |
DaySpringer: Cook up a *fake but sweet* story & start from there. And don't ask *close-end* questions! 2 Likes |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by badadvice(f): 8:27pm On May 25, 2019 |
Oyindidi: you no just get joy o.
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Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by Oyindidi(f): 8:30pm On May 25, 2019 |
badadvice:I tire for him problem |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by Deepfeel(m): 8:54pm On May 25, 2019 |
Young girls are very difficult to chat with bro go for mature one's , young girls can't keep a conversation going for 10 minutes, mature minded ladies are more open to conversation 4 Likes |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by banjicom(m): 9:32pm On May 25, 2019 |
DaySpringer: See let me tell you something, Most of this ladies are dumb and don't really know how to chat themselves. What makes you thinks u are the problem, remember it takes two to tango. Am telling you some girls are so rigid that no matter what you say or do they will never respond. Stop trying hard to make a girl smile or chat with you bro, it should even be the other way round sef. If a girl is not flowing with your chat its not your fault dat she is boring just forget and move on. Try to change the circle of ladies u chat with, and you will understand what i am saying. life is too short to learn German my brother ![]() 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by PrimadonnaO(f): 10:57pm On May 25, 2019 |
Sometimes, it's not really about "knowing how to chat." You won't just connect with some persons. Personally, if I'm making an effort to talk to you, I wouldn't reply with "one liners." If you ask how my day was, for instance, I'd state specifically what the day was like... rather than just saying "it was fine." If you can't pick something from there to further the conversation...then you're on your own... or you don't give me responses that could strengthen a conversation, then of course the conversation trails off. But with some persons even when you do all these, the conversation almost always reaches a dead end. This could be because y'all don't have enough common interests or one person is simply not vibing with the other. 3 Likes |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by uthlaw: 11:37pm On May 25, 2019 |
don't bothered yourself,95% of girls don't know how to chat... |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by Vizzim: 11:52pm On May 25, 2019 |
PrimadonnaO: This is a matured comment. Op I hope you learn from this. 2 Likes |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by adeboi1: 11:58pm On May 25, 2019 |
DaySpringer: meet iLegendd here he has some ebooks that can help you |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by valdes00(m): 12:18am On May 26, 2019 |
Deepfeel:Nobody could av said it better... young girls are NO No when it comes to chat, its more like a question and answer... they will wait for you to ask the question and they will drop monosyllabic replies... when you get tired of asking the questions, the chat dies... I have a girl like that on my WhatsApp list... we hardly chat cos she can't even hold a proper conversation, she will always wait for u to ask and she will reply.... And I still av a matured lady, we can chat from morning till night without getting bored... instead of waiting for me to start another topic, she don start another topic herself... sometimes sef, na me dey use style dodge her hahahahah ... |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by Deepfeel(m): 12:37am On May 26, 2019 |
valdes00:Very correct bro I don't waste my time chatting young girls it's very frustrating |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by DaySpringer: 9:56am On May 26, 2019 |
PrimadonnaO: You've made some valid points. You actually make an effort to keep the conversation going but many girls don't know how to, they just wait for you to do everything. This lack of common interests is also a big factor as well. It leads to an end of topics that one can discuss about. 2 Likes |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by PrimadonnaO(f): 1:30pm On May 26, 2019 |
DaySpringer: Correct. |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by iRepNaija1: 1:54pm On May 26, 2019 |
DaySpringer: This isn't the end to a conversation. It's the opportunity to learn more about each other, if you ask the right questions. |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by iRepNaija1: 2:43pm On May 26, 2019 |
OP, the reason you can't continue a conversation after the pleasantries is because you don't know how to expand the conversation from the information the other person has provided you. Here's an example: A: So do you have any siblings? B: Yes. I have two younger sisters and one older brother and sister. A: Wow. Big family. B: Yeah. A lot of people at this point would just stop talking, not know what to say, or change the subject and ask person B if have they eaten and bathed for the evening. Please don't be one of those people, especially since person B has given you information that can lead to at least three to four different questions (under the subject of family). If you're smart, you will continue like so: A: So were you the trouble-maker in your family, the goody-two shoes, the nerd or shy? B: Lol. I was the troublemaker. A: You? I don't believe it. You're always so put together and so professional at the office, I would've never guessed. [See how Person A dropped a nice compliment in the conversation?] B: Yeah, lol. I know. Most people would not suspect. A: You have to tell me a story, just one instance. ![]() B: Hmm. Well, I use to fight a lot in secondary school. My youngest sibling was teased a lot by this one stupid boy, always flipping her skirt up in front of their classmates. So I told her to start wearing shorts underneath her skirt and to tell me when she has a run in with him again. Lo and behold, he was bothering her the very next day and she texted me. Omo, the way I rushed him. I shoved dirt in his mouth after I punched him. From that day, it became my signature, shoveling dirt in girls' and guys' mouth after a fight. A: ![]() B: Don't judge me too harshly lol A: Can you be my older sibling? B: Lol. Don't you have older siblings? A: Me? Nope, just many younger siblings who ask me for school fees lol. But I'm serious o. Where were you when my classmates set books on my head because of my short stature? [Person A did two things here: used self-deprecating humor and revealed information about their own school life and family life. Person B can follow up with a question to get more information and reciprocate or the conversation can continue as is] B: Lol. A: You must be really close with your sister, right? [See how person A is using information already provided from the conversation to ask another, informed question? They're not changing the subject, they're not fumbling with what to say. They started off with a main question (do you have any siblings?) and went from there]. Other questions Person A could've asked: What do you and your family like to do for fun? Which sibling do you think you're closest to? What was it like growing up with your siblings? Were your parents strict or relaxed? This technique can be applied to anything you're talking about with someone. It hasn't failed me yet. Again, 1) just pay attention to what the person is saying and 2) use the information they provide you from the initial question you ask 3) so you can ask more questions. Good luck, OP. 4 Likes |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by damtan(m): 3:03pm On May 26, 2019 |
PrimadonnaO:You have said it all. Can I vibe with you?? |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by DaySpringer: 11:14pm On May 26, 2019 |
iRepNaija1: Can you give examples? |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by DaySpringer: 11:17pm On May 26, 2019 |
iRepNaija1: I don't think B is a Nigerian Girl. iRepNaija1: I follow what You have written here but in my case, after B admits to being the troublemaker and I give A's Response here, B replies "Yea, LOL" nothing else and then when I say tell me a story, B replies, I don't have a story to tell or I don't know which story to tell and then things get awkward and die. |
Re: Help Me Get Better At Texting/chatting by iRepNaija1: 1:46pm On May 27, 2019 |
DaySpringer: First, it doesn't matter if B is a Nigerian girl or not. Second, please stop trying to figure out who is the boy and who is the girl. Does that really matter? Third, you don't need to follow this exactly. This is just a guide to show you that you're supposed to ask a question based on the information they provide you. If they don't, there are a number of questions I listed in my first post that you could ask related to family life. Fourth, if they don't reveal more information, volunteer something about yourself or again, ask a question related to the topic at hand. |
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