I remember the first time I met Jackie Chan in the flesh. The president of our club was going for a conference in Hong Kong and I was privileged to be among the ten people he took along.

It was also my first time of traveling in the sky. I enjoyed every moment on the plane, watching films, eating different foods and staring at the beautiful Chinese hostesses.

Hong Kong is a beautiful city and very different from Nigeria. I was surprised that they spoke English there too. The venue of the conference was a very large hall. After the conference, we returned to our hotel and there I met Jackie Chan. He was not shooting a movie.

He was speaking with a woman and a burly man stood beside him. You would be surprised to learn that the Jackie Chan we loved in the movies had a bodyguard. He was so handsome, different from the movies; he also looked older.

We all stared openly at him and when he stood up with the woman and his bodyguard to walk towards the back of the hotel, I quickly stood up with my phone to follow him. I planned to snap several pictures with him to come and post it on Facebook and brag that I had met Jackie.

When I opened the backdoor of the hotel, I saw Jackie’s bodyguard on the ground with a knife embedded in his thigh; the woman was pointing a gun at Jackie Chan. Both of them turned to stare at me. It didn’t look like they were shooting a movie. I threw my phone at her and as she dodged, Jackie launched himself like he does in the movies and kicked the gun out of the woman’s hand and his other leg pushed the woman away.

“Kick her again, Jackie,” I told him.

“What? I don’t hit women,” he said.

“Jackie, this isn’t the movie; this is real life.”

Two men burst out with guns from the building next door. “Run,” Jackie Chan shouted.

I ran after him after picking up my phone. He ‘somersaulted’ over a large refuse drum like he did in countless movies. I tried to copy his move, but I landed hard on my buttocks on the other side of the drum. If my buttocks were rocks, the rocks would have crushed to dusts.

I saw Jackie Chan launch himself up a low fence and he waited for me there. The men began to fire. “Just jump up, I’ll catch you,” Jackie Chan said.

I jumped up and Jackie Chan lifted me up; I felt bullets thudding into wall below my legs. We jumped down and began to run. I heard the disappointed men say some harsh words.

“What did they say?” I asked Jackie as we ran.

“They said we are crazy,” he replied. He wasn’t sweating at all.

“Were ni won,” I said.

“What did you say?”

“That’s Yoruba for you; I said they are crazy too.”

Ten men appeared in front of us, each holding thick rods. One swung his rod at Jackie’s head; he dodged, twisted through the air and smashed his boots into two men’s faces. The first man was unbalanced on his feet so I smashed my knee into his face. Three down.

Jackie Chan used his right leg to clear a man off the ground. I did the same for another man but it seemed his leg was made of iron; I cried out in pain. As he made to hit my head with the rod, Jackie Chan came from nowhere and punched him in the face. 5 down, 5 to go.

Another man was rushing towards us. I turned and smashed a round kick to his face and I was gratified to see teeth flying out of his mouth. I collected his rod and used it to beat up two more. Jackie kicked another in the stomach.

The last man seemed to be a Kungfu master or something. He smashed a kick to my head. I saw stars somersaulting and that was the last I saw of Jackie Chan.

When I opened my eyes, I saw six pastors with Bibles praying fervently over me. I saw my mom beside me.

“Where am I?”

“In the church,” she said.

“What happened?” I asked weakly.

“A spirit entered you in the dream at midnight and you began to smash things. You destroyed your TV, DVD, tables, chairs, windows, bulbs and many things. We had to carry you to the church. It wasn’t until Pastor Debo knocked your head with a Bible that you became calm.”

Oh Lawd, so I had been dreaming. Anyway, whatever, I met Jackie Chan afterall.


Source: https://opinionsandstories.com/meeting-jackie-chan/

when persin mix tram with codeine and ganja, this is the kind of dream he will be dreaming

harkandey:
when persin mix tram with codeine and ganja, this is the kind of dream he will be dreaming

..........Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha..... thanks For giving me an early morning Laugh.

Deserving of a Pulitzer

Wow I laughed so hard when I read this