see yesterday we talked on the phone and i keep asking her to speak coz i cant think up of any topic..
and my gf got made coz she was like being ordered to talk.. and whenever i keep asking further questions such as 'why' to a topic, she said im in too deep to the matter..
and we ended up quarelling..

so guys.. am i wrong to keep asking her to talk? and wat wud u guys talk about when ur on the phone with ur gf/bf..?

No spite intended please but how old are you? Really, because only then would we know what angle to address your "problem" from. Toungue tied gees have different reasons peculair to their respective age grade.

im 20..

Firstly If u called, you should of course know what to say. Why did u call then?
I sense "tension" between u both.
Anyway i think u should spend more time together in person first. That'll make u bond into urselves a bit. there when u call, topics would come naturally.

Thinkin about what u'ld say is enough to make u "speechless".

Hummm

You asked her to speak Cos you couldn't think of any "topic" - Gosh! that line made me laugh for some reason. what "topic"?
you guys just speak like you always speak...you know ask 'bout what she's been up to? she asks yours...you tell her you love her(that's if you do),you ask what's she doing at the moment(be interested), and lots of things you can talk about with your girlfriend on phone...it's a bit funny and weird asking her to speak Cos you couldn't think of a topic...anyways you guys just talk about what you would usually talk about? What do couples going out talk about on the phone...talk about that!!!

well yea i think tats lame of me for not having any topic to talk about.. T_T
anyway she got pretty mad yesterday coz i keep telling her to talk.. to find a topic..

keele:

well yea i think tats lame of me for not having any topic to talk about.. T_T
anyway she got pretty mad yesterday coz i keep telling her to talk.. to find a topic..

L.O.L yeah I can understand why she got mad...I'D get mad too if it were me...L.O.L

Hi keele,
  I feel ya . Did you ask her about money matter whether she is broke or loaded? Thats a topic most babes love to talk about but most guys avoid asking so why won't there be gist . By the way, why should you be thinking of what to say to your baby so if una marry na so una go think before una go talk. Maybe, the girl is not urs if not it suppose to flow naturally. Sha, next time before she picks up the phone, have a piece of paper and write down what you going to talk about. Sha, when she picks up the phone, just be looking at it, that way its going to flow. Just some tips by disney babe ok. I hope you be fine . .

NB: Also, when there's nothing to talk of on the phone, start using sexy sweet words like l love you , l want you, bla bla bla and she be gigling with laughter. .

here is a tip on what you can say when you ring her
Keele:hello baby
GF:Hello
Keele:how are you?
GF:I am fine
Keele:How was/is/your day/night?
GF:it was cool
Keele:did you think of me/dream of me
GFgiggles)
@keele,based on her reply,you follow her up...
Keele:well,I just called to find out how you were/or to wish you a lovely day.........
GF:oh thanks a lot
Keele:hope to see you today.Take care.I love you
GF:I love you too.
Well,this may or may not work for you ooo......there are no hard and fast rules.....

1. Keep conversations short
Whether u are a student or worker, u always want to give her the impression that u lead a full, active life. By keeping ur initial telephone conversations brief, u will give her the impression that u are busy and in demand. And as an added bonus, if u are always the one ending the conversations, it will keep u in a position of control, leaving her wanting more and more of ur time.

2. Leave on a high note
She'll always remember what u said last. Therefore, before ending a conversation, make an effort to leave on a positive note, such as with a well thought-out joke or a funny story. Even if ur entire telephone conversation went poorly, if u leave her smiling before saying goodbye, she is more likely to want to speak to u again -- and hopefully see/be with u in person -- which, of course, is ur ultimate goal.

3. Have a purpose to ur call
Don't just call to chitchat. I cannot stress this enough: preparation, preparation, preparation. Be armed and ready with a purpose to ur call (even if its just to hear her voice, tell her); this will give her the impression that u are assertive and thoughtful enough to think of a plan beforehand. This plan will also serve as a backup weapon should there be an awkward silence in the conversation or if her voice mail picks up.


Remember the golden rule, if u nor get anything to yarn again, say bye. Dont allow up to 1 minute pause in a phone convo. It only describes ur dullness. u are the guy, u should be i control (U can be quiet and still in control)

i sense an overdose of male ego in point #1 of layi's post............
but the 2nd point sounds good
I like diseny's idea of writing out what to say to her on paper before you call her,(but what if she calls you)_{it dosen't matter} ..........so anyway, when talking to her on the phone, say words that show you're genuingly  interested in her well being. You could talk about your selves, you know, your families and friends. you could both talk about your hobbies,current affairs,school. You could both re affirm your love for each other by saying romantic words and stuff like that, u could take the lead on that one if she's too shy to. tell her things to make her feel special. Make her laugh and encourage her to make u laugh too. you could even tell her what goes on on NL  all the best sha.

layi:

Anyway i think u should spend more time together in person first. That'll make u bond into urselves a bit. there when u call, topics would come naturally.

I totally agree with that. It's easier to be romantic when you are actually looking into her eyes. Then you can pick up topics from your surroundings... like her having a new hairstyle (tell her it's nice then you can ask about the saloon, talk about how she feels when she's sitting down under a dryer for so long, does she read or does she sleep while she's under the dryer, from there you can talk about what type of books she reads and what type you read... etc, etc). Also, always be very sensitive and know when a particular topic is getting dry. Always think ahead and have another topic to replace it. Before she's finished answering a question, you should have thought ahead about the next question you're going to ask her.

If you can't see her and you have to stick to the phone, think up topics as you go along too. You could start with a joke, hide your number and tell her you're calling from a telecomms company and you've been instructed to cut off her line. Then when she starts acting confused, tell her your name (in the same official manner) and watch her laugh.

There are a lot more tips, but they are best learnt yourself. Practice makes perfect.

waw layi... ur an expert ya..><
those r some great tips...
thanks alot guys.. ill be trying those 'techniques' tonite
wish me luck...

is phone intimacy ok?

keele: all the best ok bro

some body is asking whether is phone intimacy ok? please before you answer that question, what is phone intimacy?
The idea i have about phone intimacy is the sexy words you say one phone to the one(s) you love.
I need your definition

@layi

Atimes, I wonder the way Layi advices all these dudes in relationship and yet you claim never been in any relationship before. I wonder how u get to know all these tactics work, without ever been putting it into practise.

I think It's all about maturity in a relashp.So get ur mind natured n go on speak your heart out to your babe.

operation successful... XD
thanks guys... really... thanks alot..><

dejiolowe:

is phone intimacy ok?

It's not just OK, it's perfectly FINE!

I see keele's problem has been solved. I don't need to contribute.

hot-angel:


I see keele's problem has been solved. I don't need to contribute.

What were you going to contribute? Please go ahead. Some of us want to learn more...

@kenflavor
I wonder how many banking/finace lecturers have actually worked in the bank.

layi:

@kenflavor
I wonder how many banking/finace lecturers have actually worked in the bank.

Or how many bank executives studied banking/finance?? lol

let me tell a truth, i dont like long coversation on the phone. i dont know why. the maximum i can talk on the phone is 5-7 minutes. i have problem on that and i think i should seek help. i love to see who i am talking to then we can tall all day. that is my life.

seeni4ever:

let me tell a truth, i don't like long coversation on the phone. i don't know why. the maximum i can talk on the phone is 5-7 minutes. i have problem on that and i think i should seek help. i love to see who i am talking to then we can tall all day. that is my life.

say the truth, u dont v credit...

@dejiolowe. i am not the kind of guy that cry about minutes. i talk anytime wherevever i am. i just dont like phone phone conversation and do u think every guy is a broke ass nigger like you

jst say sometin amusing n dnt ask her 2 talk loadz of gals dnt like dat
find a topic dat u thk interest her, maybe sometin aba ur relationship
whneva i talk 2 ma boyfriend, God,''do we eva stop talkin''?
deres always plenty 2 say, we mostly talk aba luv, us , da future stuff like dat
maybe da reason 4 ur is cuz u dnt knw very much aba her or u've only jst started goin out

U'll tell her things u would have done if she were around u @ dat moment, and how u are pissed off u cant do those things, (Even those u wouldn't do) lol

good one layi! that was some tip!!