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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Religion / Fucking Church (369 Views)
Call It What It Is, Jehovah's Witness Is A Weird Fucking Cult / Jesus Christ Is Fucking Dead (2) (3) (4)
Fucking Church by Omaricha002(m): 7:30pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
CHURCH AND SCAN. Preacher 1 : If you want an accelerated financial growth within one month, come out and sow N250,000 in this alter. Member: You came out and sowed the money. In some cases, you borrowed money in order to redeem your pledge. Preacher 2: Instructs an usher to bring 20 plastic chairs in the alter. Afterwards, he would face the congregation and declare " I can see 20 angels of God seated on these seats at the alter. If you want them to carry all your problems, and you can afford N500,000, run to the alter immediately and sit on one of these seats". Member: You rushed to the alter, took a seat and sowed N500,000. Preacher 3: Grace is a five letter word. I can hear God saying that as many as can sow N5000, they would experience the grace of God in their life. If I am lying, know that God did not call me. Member: You joined others to sow N5000. Preacher 4: Come out and give your tithe. Malachi 3 says " test me with this and see if I will not open the windows of heaven and release blessings to you that there will not be room enough to receive. Member: You have always given a tithe of every dime you received. Preacher 5: If you can key into this church building project by donating bags of cement, blocks, roofing sheets, God said He will make you a landlord very soon; if you are a single lady, you will marry in three months time" Member: You came out and sowed money equivalent to the building materials. My friend (member), you have always been faithful in sowing these and many more for several years. Today: You are struggling to make both ends meet; You have a job but your income is nothing to write home about; You have not paid your house rent not to talk of being a landlord(as promised); You have not married (as promised ); You have piles of bills yet to be paid; and many more problems. My friend, what happened to those promises from those preachers after you sowed from your hard earned income? Why has none of them come to pass as they 'prophesied'? Why are you still giving and giving, and worshipping even the ground these 'men of gods stepped on? My friend, what happened to common sense? You are quick to castigate politicians for failing to fulfil the promises they made; and you would never want to caste your vote for them again because you believe that "if it does not work, it is not worth giving another chance". You throw your gadgets batteries away when they run down because "whatever does not perform it's function is not worth keeping". Despite these, your brain would stop working immediately you enter church. Why are you still believing some of these "men of money"? Why do you keep defending them whenever people like us try to make you see sense? I am sure that many people will attack me for this post, but I just don't care. I love you and for that reason I must tell you the bitter truth. The problem is not God. The problem is not that God does not want you to sow seeds or that God does not want us to build a place where Christians may gather to worship him and be edified. The problem is that your greed has so blinded you that you fall prey to these men who claim that "God said" when God has not said anything. They have used you to make themselves wealthy while you are still lavishing in penury. They twist scriptures and use them to their advantage. My friend, I was once in your shoes. I have seen it all. I was once in that bondage. It is high time you started using your brain and got delivered.......just as I am. Shallom. Note: (1)There are still very genuine men of God that rightly divide the Word of God and that speak the mind of God. You can identify them by what they preach about; their passion to win souls for Christ, and their selflessness. A genuine man of God would preach about Jesus Christ as the only way to salvation, and seek to project only Jesus Christ and not about himself or his ministry. 2) A man of money would often mention Jesus Christ, and spend more time preaching about the testimonies people had after coming in contact with him, his ministry and the money they sowed. They would conjure up flattering/ seducing words that would make you easily come out to sow your "last card" in your account. Their interest is to have more followers, more people to fill up the church building seats, etc. They take pride in how much money they have; their "progress in the ministry" measured by the magnificence of the church building, the properties they have, the number of members in each church service, etc. They spend time looking to make connections with popular pastors who can permit them to preach in their pulpits and win members/money for themselves. A genuine man of God is so carried away with doing the soul wining assignment God gave them than looking for these mundane things. 3) When you see a genuine man of God, they are worth investing on because one is certain that they would use the donations for pure soul winning and for looking after the poor in the neighborhood. When they ask for voluntary seed sowing (without mentioning specific amount or making promises of heaven and Earth to you for sowing), you would obviously see their passion. 4) Many men of money have often used the term "raising funds for evangelism" in order to entice more members to give. However, you would need to understand what they mean by evangelism. For many, evangelism means building a bigger church, beautifying the alter, buying a finer vehicle for the pastor for 'soul wining exercise, etc Be careful of these men of money. On the other hand, never give up believing in Jesus Christ, in some genuine men He uses, and in the Church. Shallom! From MC Omaricha smart. MC of all kinds of occasions, an educational educationist by professional professionist. 08037728124 2 Likes |
Re: Fucking Church by Omaricha002(m): 7:30pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
if you know, you know but you don't know |
Re: Fucking Church by psucc(m): 7:47pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
Op though your jokes are real the use of the word CHURCH is wrong. Leave the church for the owner. He is dealing with such men daily. Those who knows know where to worship |
Re: Fucking Church by Omaricha002(m): 7:50pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
Hmmmmmmmmm.... |
Re: Fucking Church by ziegurf(m): 7:55pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
..las las pastors na scammers, run away from them for your dear life |
Re: Fucking Church by CodeTemplar: 7:55pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
I have never encountered any of those preachers in such actions in my life. I only hear of them. |
Re: Fucking Church by Omaricha002(m): 7:57pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
5% discount for all your program this season. My name is MC Omaricha smart, an educational educationist by professional professionist, MC of all kinds of occasions, wedding anchor, traditional marriage ceremony, child dedication, naming ceremony, church dedication, music and book lunch ceremony, birth day celebration, bacholars night ceremonies, fund raiser, seminar anchor, work shop anchor, conference anchor and many more. call MC Omaricha smart on 08037728124 |
Re: Fucking Church by Nobody: 9:04pm On Oct 12, 2019 |
Do you think the victims are responding to the call of the pastors? Nah nah nah People only respond to the call of their personal yearnings; their thoughts and their greeds, manifesting in the voice of the clergy man/woman. If pastors don't collect it, someone else will do. Yeah, I have my arriere pensee as regards Christianity and the documents that established it, but I don't think any Christian or potential christian with 'ability to read' deserves any pity if scammed by any of these unscrupulous elements parading themselves as God of men. Your points are very valid only to a thinking man; not someone whose reasoning has been enveloped by greed and deliberate ignorance. They give, not because they love God or Jesus, nah, they give in exchange for something they want. Very few has the gut to follow Jesus I read about. Very tiny few are mad enough to forsake life in order to have life. People embraces Jesus to cover their vanity and shallowness, not knowing that Jesus is a symbol and not the goal. What can I say that has not been said before? I can only hope that people will start waking up from their sleep. Peace |
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