Stats: 3,189,348 members, 7,937,057 topics. Date: Sunday, 01 September 2024 at 11:58 AM |
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / You Do Not Care. (3087 Views)
13 Ways To Get Over A Guy Who Does Not Care About You / Why You Should Not Care About What People Say About You / 13 Ways To Get Over A Guy Who Does Not Care About You. (2) (3) (4)
You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 3:56pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
So you meet someone and you both like each other, and over time the feeling started getting stronger and what not. The only downside is that distance is a big problem. I am not taking about Kano-to-Lagos type of distance, but Germany or Yankee to Nigeria type of distance. So once day, the guy was like you know what, while it is difficult for us to see each other at this point, I have no problem with you having sex with another guy if you want to. For the sake of argument, this guy was genuinely being upfront and do not see the fuss about sex if should the girl choose to do it. One of the many reasons the guy suggested this is because, the gal is fine and truth be told someone will eventually come along and try to sleep with her anyway and the gal may also need to have intimacy at some point. Anyway, the gal then turned around and said to the guy that she is shocked and appalled that the guy can say such a thing! She even went further to accuse the guy of not caring enough etc. Now nairalanders, is there anything bad in making such a suggestion? Bearing in mind that the guy actually cares, but do not want the issue of sex with other people be a problem at all. Also, will you allow this as a lady? If not, why not? |
Re: You Do Not Care. by kokoye(m): 4:05pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
I'm not quite sure how a guy will not mind his lady shagging other guys - especially once he really cares about and wants to marry. But then. . .that's just me. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Nobody: 4:06pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
ElRazur: Well, I think the guy went too far . . . somethings do not need to be said! It's like by telling her to go ahead and have an affair he's trying to appease his own consience. ![]() Personally, I dont think any guy that truly cares for a girl and wants to settle down with her will say something like that to her! ![]() Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying he doesn't care . . . but it looks like he has given up on the relationship already! |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Dyt(f): 4:07pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
2 my own take i ll blast d hell outta him even if i v 2 do it,it doesnt v 2 com 4rm him it only shows truely he neva cared |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 4:29pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
So what about people who like each other, but in the mean time have sex with other people as a stop gap? Let's be real, these things happen and the guy was only being upfront with his views? No? |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Dyt(f): 4:32pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Den it shldnt v cm 4rm him dat wz lyk a way of tellin er off its rude |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 4:39pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
The guy merely suggested it and said "it is up to her". I don't know about you, but I have a feeling that there is nothing suggesting the guy do not care, after all he was just pointing out the obvious. Abi I no dey see am from the ladies perspective? ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Dyt(f): 4:47pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Wat an unreasonable suggestions sm1 lyk me actually tk things in minor bt nt dis its uncalled 4 its sickenin its crazy its beta he tells me babe i think dis so called rel cant work,i think its best we all v it in drms n let it end dere i wont tk it infact i myt end d so called world instanta |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 4:48pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
How is it unreasonable? Do you mind explaining? ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Dyt(f): 4:53pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Simply cos it doesnt mk sense ow wld he picture it cmon think of it well as said earlier he wldnt feel a thing cos he neva truely cares n feels nottin inshort d dude is a slowpoke |
Re: You Do Not Care. by MrCork26: 5:03pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
ElRazur , did your chick run away? |
Re: You Do Not Care. by iice(f): 5:04pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Hmmm someone a long time ago asked me that question. I said i'd tell a person to do that. . .the someone got confused by my reaction ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 5:06pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
iice: Do you see anything wrong with what the guy suggested? |
Re: You Do Not Care. by iice(f): 5:09pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Not really. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 5:16pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
iice: Do you mind elaborating a little bit as to why you do not see anything wrong with it. This is very important please. ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by iice(f): 5:32pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Ha Ha. I'm a realist and a practical one. However this is subjective. He/she sleeping with another person can happen and i say can, because some people do happen to go a while without having to sleep with another person. Abstinence is hard but not impossible like it's been said in another thread. I can understand if he says i should do that. And if i know him, as i should. . .i wouldn't see it as him giving himself carte blanche to sleep around. I would see it as it being a practical thing. Doesn't mean i would do it, but i can understand. I've said time and again, i'm very mental about things. I suppose it seems like being in an open relationship. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by dayokanu(m): 5:34pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Thats the problem with distance relationships. I dont believe in it if both parties dont have a way of meeting physically anytime soon |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Nobody: 5:42pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
I think the guy is probably cheating on the girl, or he's planning to sleep with someone else. He don't want to take the guilt alone, so to be fair enough he's giving the girl the go ahead also ![]() There's no excuse for cheating whether long distance or near. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Nobody: 6:03pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
El stop trying to justify your actions. Just tell the girl you've met someone else and the distance relationship is not working for you and stop decieving her jor. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 6:09pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
iice: I think the point was to be upfront and to put across a practical approach to things. Thanks. (333*333*) Ujujoan: I never said this was about me lol. Also, I never mentioned in the OP that it was a relationship, I just stated they both like each other a lot. Trust female nairalanders to try and find meaning and motives for every thing. Ujujoan, have you ever been in a similar situation where distance was a barrier? If yes, how did you cope? |
Re: You Do Not Care. by johnterry1: 6:12pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
hmmm |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Nobody: 6:54pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
Can't see anything wrong with that. Seems deception and deceit are now part and parcel of relationships, otherwise why would she feign offence at his stating that which is already happening or can possibly happen? Seems the unwritten rule in relationships these days is 'see no evil, hear no evil, think no evil, suspect no evil, and believe no evil. . .even if evil surrounds you'. That is what most people interpret as 'maturity' and 'security' abi? Make dem dey deceive themselves. So when someone lets his partner know that he admits the possibility of poo happening, the partner 'forms' righteous indignation and accuses him of not caring? Yet if them say make she go swear for Babalawo Shrine say that thing wey the guy talk no go happen she go pick race pass Usain Bolt. As far as I'm concerned, a so-called serious relationship MUST be founded on hard truth, not unearned trust and mutual deceit. . .else it'll be nothing but a disgraceful sham. And I'll rather be in an honest open relationship than a mutually deceitful 'closed' relationship. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 7:09pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
pro01: Hard to ague against your points. Well said. 9.5 out of 10. ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by madlady(f): 7:26pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by livedit(f): 7:52pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
I would also have an issue with that too! ![]() ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 8:19pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
livedit: Would you rather he keeps mute and do it behind your back while maintaining a false approach with you? From what I can tell, they like each other and that is about it. But there may be possibility that a relationship may happen. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by Odunnu: 8:49pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
I'll definitely not find it funny. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by star4(f): 8:58pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
interesting, hmmmmm |
Re: You Do Not Care. by member67023: 9:20pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
STOP DECEIVING YOURSELF AND CALL A SPADE A SPADE. If there is no relationship, and only a "like each other a lot" friendship, then the guy does not have any business telling her to sleep with anyone. And if there is a relationship, i mean they both agreed to date each other exclusively, the guy is still wrong for asking her to sleep around just because of distance barrier. SO TELL YOURSELF THE TRUTH. |
Re: You Do Not Care. by ElRazur: 9:36pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
nakedwire: I'm sorry if what I am saying is not good enough for you. No vex. It is entirely possible for two people to like each other and not cross over into having a full blown relationship. Same way it is possible for two people to have sexxx with each other and not be in a relationship. The guy never asked the gal to sleep around but suggested that she can if she wants to due to the distance involve and the fact it may eventually happen anyway. You see,what you are saying is different from what I posted in the OP. ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by livedit(f): 10:01pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
ElRazur: If that is the case, then he could've just left things as they are. Everybody deserves to know where they stand in a relationship. So they are just talking and not in a committed relationship, then I think he could've worded alot better than that. Because you can go do whatever with whomever I won't be mad, I'd look at him like he is crazy! When you are only dating, of course I'd be like you are free to see whomever you want to see. Then once they call it exclusive then that is just what it means "exclusive". I appreciate all honesty in a relationship, but him telling me versus to me already knowing the deal, wouldn't make me feel any better. He just need to learn a better way to communicate his feelings. That is his only crime if this is the case. ![]() |
Re: You Do Not Care. by googles: 10:06pm On Nov 10, 2010 |
lol. . . . .not a nice thing to say |
Help!!! I Am In Love With My Friend's Mother! / 3 Types Of Women You Should Never Date Or Marry If You Want To Live Long / Two Types Of Gullible Girls
(Go Up)
Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 55 |