I great u all please I post this in this marriage group to please help me solve this problem when am 3 years old my father and mother has misunderstanding my mother left and my father went and marriage another wife .I was brought up by my grandma till I come I finished primary 6,my mother got married to another man and countinue her life now letter I came to Lagos I came Lagos when I was 14years after everything I learned work and I got a job in one phamacitical company in engineering department I am a mentanice office I work welder and fabrication or Al iron door bulgulary prove mixing tanks and industrial capping and filling machine I do serving and repair I started having some money until I get to again if 25 as a young man I don't want to life a way word life and i began to think how to get married I approached a girl and told her I want to marry her so after everything she told me how her brother have been matreated her she . she told me that she is looking for any man that comes on her way and ask for marriage and for me the is the FRIST girl I ever ask for marriage and out of pity and how fax I was after 2 months we travel for the traditional things now when I get to village I have to my father everything but for my greatest surprised my father refuse not to go with us rather he send someone to go with us to the girls village getting to her village for me I was like just pay the drowy and do other things later I camy back for other things. after everything the family collect the drowy from us as we come back to Lagos although I was planning to wedd but Christian way she didn't suppose to leave with me until after wedding so I told her to go and stay with her brother after some months we do our wedding but her brother rejected her and told her to go back to my house and is against the law in my church to leave with the girl u have not wedded so I send her to one of our village brother to stay with them until our wedding come but after everything she can't cop again that is how I call her to come and start living with me before u know she got pregnancy after everything she delivered I call her mother informed her to come she agreed to come but letter told me to send transport money I told her to come when she is going back I will give her back at the end she told me that she will not come again I was not happy about it I tell my father that my wife have delivered I was expecting him to call her but up till today he didn't call her this is 7 year my father don't call her after the second child I found out my wife is this stubborn type she is not obeydent well I coutunie but honestly I don't have peace of mind I can't go to church together with her if I comes back home I became angry we do qurel alot and settled but if I remember we're I come from and my baground I keep calm pushing the marriage but I don't have joy I tried to be getting dronk but I don't drink I focres my self but I could not sometime I prefer to stay outside than to come back home because I will not feel happy I began to see myself as am in borndega am getting angry for any moment I shouted every time am at home but went I go out I will be fine . this is how I have been living since 2013 to today 2019 I don't know what to do I don't want what happened to my father to happen to me afraid am not strong in church again I have not wedded come to my wife side know one call or even ask after her know one to call in-law oh my God help me this is not the kind of marriage I wanted in my life am deying I feel pains in my soul am living with out peace I can even have sex with her after that period I will be unhappy I am a leader in the church I work in the church as a minister but Al of a suddenly I cromble and not been active in church activities.when my wife give birth to my second child I called my mother inlaw again to come she now tell me that she will not come that am not there in-law I should come and finished every thing I suppose to do this the children belongs to them since then I began to think my worry's increase in December 2018 my mother inlaw died I was called to inform me after everything I travel to village to prepared for the burial my father agreed to go with us with my kindred people I sharted a bus to the burial ground when is the time to welcome in-law we came my beloved brother and sister that is Were is sei what I have not seen in my life one of the elder began to ask us who are we that the don't know who we are I try to explain but I don't know what to say after all they embarrassed my people and my people get angry and said even though if they want to do something like this is should not be pulbic disgrace like this when am about to go the family as me to stay back I told my father go go with my kindred people they called for a meeting there I noticed that the family is up to 20 people's I was surprised so the ask me if I have paid my wife drowy I said Yes the should ask my father in law when the ask my father in-law the man dined that I didn't pay for any thing to him I was like what is happening is this Yahoo Yahoo or am my dreaming I was like is this true after the meeting the told me that I have not married to my wife even though I do anything is concerned both too of us that the dorwy belong to the family not my father in-law that he have been eating other people own and this is his turn one of the man in that meeting Stand up and said if he didn't say anything that the Gods of there land we punish him he said that I paid for drowy to my father in-law but they conclude that the will hide it and denial that I didn't pay for it . from that meeting my mind was not in this marriage again and am not ready to go to my wife village for any thing I don't know what to do we travel come back to Lagos since we come back honestly I don't want to continue in this marriage but I don't want people to think is family problem and am afraid cures my wife don't understand what am passing through please I need ur adivce

For me to read this epistle and successfully understand it shows that you can still achieve a good home with that women despite your short-comings in the marriage rites.
the best thing you can do now is to love your wife. you both have only yourselves now and i think you'll be alright. those inlaws are just looking for how to take more money from you.
just find a place in your heart to love your wife all over again. you need peace in your home and it must start from you.

Which kind of long epistles be dis!
No comma,
No full stop
No paragraph
No space!

Na wa for you ooo.

Edited:

It is all your faults from the beginning, you can't leave your wife now after 2 children. Your problem is not even your wife, your problem is lack of money even if you go for divorce i am sure the same thing will happen again with another woman.

My brother please calm down. Just relax...all will be well.

I think you should first and foremost read the bible more on what happens to a man after marriage...he leaves his family behind to live/bond with his wife and she shall be his new family. You are married, you have two kids, please try to see the goodness in your wife and kids. You can change church so the two of you change start all over again and receive counsel in the new church. She obviously have no where to go, biko take things easy. May God bless your marriage.