1. He is an employee of God, not the church
Every pastor, first and foremost, owes his service and duty to God. As a result of this, do not expect him to be spending the church money on you.

He may be supervising a large congregation, but the church money does not belong to him and you shouldn’t ever think that your marriage will never have financial challenges.

2. He will entertain ladies
Another key thing is to cut out any form of jealousy when you see your husband with other ladies. As a pastor, he is bound to entertain ladies and you will have to learn to accept that.

You don’t expect him to only speak to men, because he is a pastor for all, whether man or woman.

3. You must have a welcoming heart
Being a pastor’s wife is not an easy thing. Both of you have a reputation to maintain so you have to do everything to keep your husband going. To do that, you need to have a welcoming heart that accommodates everyone that comes your way.

Don't create enemies for your husband and for yourself as well through your attitude.

4. Learn to sleep alone
Another key thing every pastor’s wife must learn to do is to sleep alone.

Pastors are generally busy people due to their workload. This means that he could be engaged in frequent travels, leaving their wives and children at home most often.

I once remember a particular missionary journey that took me away from my family for about 12 days. Thank God for the grace upon my dear wife that was mightily at work.

5. Learn to be hospitable
A pastor’s wife is also expected to be very hospitable. People are bound to come to you for counselling and irrespective of their stories and backgrounds, you must welcome them.

6. Limited romance
As a pastor’s wife you should also know that you cannot have romance every day. This is because a pastor has many responsibilities at almost every point in time.

At one point he could be preparing a sermon note, at another point he could be fasting, and you can’t be ‘disturbing’ him with romance at such times. LOL!

7. Be the perfect wife
No human being is perfect, but when you marry a pastor, you are expected to be as perfect as you can get.

Expectations of you are higher and you must do well to keep those standards and not disappoint by the grace of God.
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Unfair expectations attached to some pastor's wife:

https://thomrainer.com/2017/09/ten-unfair-expectations-pastors-wives/

One wife told us that church members resent it when she is seen doing anything outside the church.





“Church members utilize me as a de facto assistant to my husband, giving me messages for him.” One wife shared with us that she received eleven messages to give to her husband after a specific worship service.


“I am still amazed how many church members expect me to function as an employee of the church.”


“I am always supposed to be perfectly made up and dressed when I leave the house.” A church member expressed her dismay to a pastor’s wife who ran into a grocery store without makeup. You can’t make this stuff up.

“I have no freedom at our church to be anything but perfectly emotionally composed.” This story really got to me. A deacon chastised a pastor’s wife for shedding tears at church four days after her dad died.


“I think some of our church members expect my family to take a vow of poverty"

I hope you also know that a pastor could also be a woman, so same also applies to men who want to marry a pastor. For instance:


2. She will entertain guys
Another key thing is to cut out any form of jealousy when you see your wife with other guys. As a pastor, she is bound to entertain guys and you will have to learn to accept that.

You don’t expect her to only speak to women, because she is a pastor for all, whether woman or man.